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Justin

@suckminimally.com
345 followers 536 following 453 posts

I'm here because the billionaires aren't. I write code, make user interfaces, drink coffee, read, and try to make things a little better for people. (he/him) Known as "monitron" in some places. suckminimally.com

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Justin @suckminimally.com · 16/09/2026
There's always a king bean. First among beans, safe up on his throne. When the grinder roars awake, he looks down with pity on his doomed brethren. But, what can be done? Fate blessed him with his place, as it doomed them to theirs. Forever he will reign, even as his subjects dwindle. Yes. Forever.
A low-angle photo of the smoked plastic bean hopper of my espresso machine. The machine is black and the backsplash behind it is made of teal tiles in a cube pattern. The hopper is full of medium roast coffee beans. In the center of the hopper is a gray plastic handle used to lock or unlock the hopper from the machine. On top of that handle rests a solitary coffee bean.
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 07/09/2026
Just a reminder that going down Wikipedia rabbit holes is way better for your mental health than doomscrolling, and it’s equally endless
A screenshot of the Wikipedia page “List of lists of lists”
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 04/09/2026
This Bluesky Trending item appears to be 100% fabricated by @bsky.app ‘s LLM. I can’t even find any posts that it could be referring to, and it certainly isn’t true in my map apps.
A screenshot of the Bluesky iPhone app Explore page. The #4 trending item is:

Maps revert Lake Ontario name
Google and Apple Maps reversed course, restoring Lake Ontario’s name after backlash.
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 18/07/2026
Honey stop the car
A big sign with trees in the background and various attention-getting decorations on the periphery. The sign says “Never Buy A Lemon Again - MAKE SURE IT IS Ai CERTIFIED - AiCertifiedUsedCars.com”. It also has an AI generated illustration of an android looking like a cross between a Transformer and Iron Man. He is holding a shield that says “AI Certified Used Cars.” His right foot is on the hood of a much smaller car that is somehow also a lemon (as in the fruit) - rounded and yellow with a pebbly texture and a small green leaf sprouting from its hood.
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 09/07/2026
Do you think people with dually pickups will get mad if I compliment them on their trucks’ “child-bearing hips?”
A view of a pickup truck from the rear. It has two wheels on each side of the rear axle. The body has been widened to accommodate these, leading to a distinctly humpy appearance.
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 29/06/2026
Brands, take note. If you don't get the response you want at first, you can ALWAYS TRY YELLING
a crop from an iPhone screenshot showing two notifications from the Domino's app.
The first, from Saturday 4:22pm, says:
Build the exact pizza you want—choose your crust and up to 7 toppings, then feed the craving. Terms apply.
The second, from 4 minutes ago, says the exact same thing BUT IN ALL CAPS!!!
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 26/06/2026
Sounds about right. I feel like the near 50-50 Techbro/Neo-Luddite and Hopepilled/Doomer splits explain a lot about me. It’s been forever since I’ve taken one of these. If you want to try: britmonkey.com/2020s-politi...
Quiz results indicating that my closest match is Zohran Mamdani. I’m apparently 91% Woke (vs Chud), about half and half Techbro/Neo-Luddite, half and half Hopepilled/Doomer and 80% Davos (vs Dubai)
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 20/06/2026
Oh, thank you! Unfortunately looks like it’s region locked for some reason. I like Libro because some of the money goes to a local bookstore, but I’ll get it on Audible if needed…I don’t want to miss it!!
A screenshot:

Get Ahead of Being Dead
by Evie King

Due to publisher restrictions, this audiobook is unavailable for purchase in your selected country.
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 09/06/2026
Oh, sorry lol – it's a reference to the opening spoken part of the song, and it's been stuck in my head for 27 years:
[Intro: Tim & Matt]
Hey, Matt
Yeah, Tim?
Hey, you talked to Marc lately?
Uh, haven't really talked to him but he looks pretty, uh, down
"He looks pretty, uh, down?"
Yeah, well, maybe we should cheer him up then
What do you, uh, suppose we should do?
Well, does he like butter tarts?
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 03/06/2026
Gmail, what in the ever-loving fuck are we doing here? Oh wait, sorry, it's cool, they're "for research use only – not for human consumption." I didn't realize.
A montage of four screenshots from the Gmail app on my phone. At the top of my inboxes, multiple sellers are advertising peptides, antibodies, nicotine-free mushroom pouches and whole protein lysates.Details of some of the advertisements once tapped on. Each product tile shows a vial of research chemicals, peptides and blends thereof. They are marked "For research use only." The most recognizable ones are Semaglutide and NAD+. The goofiest is called "GLOW Blend."
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 31/05/2026
Would you believe this cat is almost 19 years old?
A low angle photo of a calico cat lying in a cardboard crate that used to contain strawberries. She is lit by bright sunlight through a window. She’s staring right into the camera with narrow slits for pupils. One white paw is visible through a notch in the bottom of the crate.
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 11/04/2026
Planarian
Microphotograph of a planarian, a kind of flatworm. It is looking particularly fat and sassy, and if you squint it kind of has cat ears
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 10/03/2026
It keeps happening!! I'm glad/sorry that it's not just me
Collage of 3 screen snippets from GitHub's web interface showing lines of code added and removed in pull requests. One shows +4264 -183. Another shows +4840. A third, bigger, shows +31780 -634!
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 25/02/2026
Comic panel of Batman breaking a gun in half. “This is the weapon of the enemy.” he says, “We do not need it. We will not use it.”
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 16/11/2025
Oh boy, this is a tough one. I’m totally against age-gating laws but anything that lets us pump the brakes on this terrifying societal experiment is a good we desperately need. Give the poor kids a chance to develop critical thinking skills before they outsource their brains to LLMs.
A screenshot from OP’s linked EFF article. It is headed:
Young People’s Access to Legitimate AI Tools Could Be Cut Off Entirely.
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 01/09/2025
Here’s a source: www.nyc.gov/html/sirr/do... …looks like OLTPS was the name of an office, not a computer system.
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 21/08/2025
I said I'd stop posting GLP-1 updates, but right now I'm just happy to have something to be happy about. I just got new bloodwork, and my lipids, liver enzymes and cardiovascular risk have all continued to improve, nearly all into the normal range. Still feels like magic. I'm so grateful.
Time series charts of 8 lab tests (Apolipoprotein B, AST, ALT, Cholesterol, HDL, VLDL, Non-HDL, Triglycerides) showing marked improvement from December 2024 to August 2025. All measures have gone from abnormal values to normal values, apart from HDL which is still a few mg/dL away from normal. The most surprising is Triglycerides which have dropped from 568 mg/dL to 122!
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 04/07/2025
I hung on to this too long because I (perhaps naively) believed they would stop getting worse at some point. As it turns out, no.
Screenshot of an email from ordercs@nytimes.com to me from 12:26pm today. The New York Times logo and wordmark are shown. The subject line is "You've canceled your subscription." There's nothing informative in the email body.
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 20/06/2025
Specifically this stuff is elite. Even the diet version isn’t bad!
A can of Dr. Brown’s Original Cream Soda - “flavor favorite for generations!”
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 03/06/2025
What a tremendously silly thing to be especially good at. I'd trade this skill for almost any other!
A screenshot from the typing test at keybr.com. It says I typed 110.6wpm with 99.6% correct keystrokes, which puts me in the top 1.02% for speed and 0.49% for accuracy.
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 10/05/2025
Yes, this is what we in the culinary arts call 𝒎𝒊𝒔𝒆 𝒆𝒏 𝒑𝒍𝒂𝒄𝒆
A gathering of items in a kitchen, including a box of off-brand mac & cheese and its open bag of white cheddar powder, a bottle of hot sauce, a tiny measuring cup with milk, and a glass prep bowl with two tablespoons of margarine. And in case my stupid Unicode characters play havoc with your screen reader, it says "mise en place" in a pretentious italic typeface
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 10/04/2025
I am grateful I can get this medicine but there has to be a more efficient way to ship 2mL of liquid..
Four teeny tiny vials of Zepbound on a kitchen counter. Behind it is a mountain of packing material including a box and styrofoam cooler, bubble wrap and five paper inner boxes. You could fit hundreds of those vials in the cooler!
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 01/04/2025
Self-care
A gray plate with two halves of a toasted sesame bagel. Both are topped with cream cheese, smoked salmon and a thin slice of beefsteak tomato.
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 07/03/2025
Another GLP-1 update, just over two months in. I've lost about 17lbs, and my sleep apnea seems to have decreased significantly. How can I tell? I'm waking up a lot less at night (woo!) and my watch seems to corroborate this. Some of my clothes have begun to fit a little bit better too. (🧵1/4)
A chart of my weight. It shows a relatively steady decrease from almost 300lbs to a little over 280lbs. At the top are some numbers: Trend Line -1.8lbs per week, -17.0lbs in 66 days.Two screenshots of the Breathing Disturbances chart in the Apple Health app. The left one shows mostly elevated levels of disturbances between 10/21/2024-11/20/2024. The right one shows mostly not elevated levels between 2/15/2025-3/17/2025.
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 01/03/2025
I'm back on my bullshit again. This time with added prosciutto.
A small margherita pizza on a gray plate, with prosciutto and an egg on top. It's cut to show the egg is done medium. There's a little more cheese on top this time to tie everything together. It's perfect!
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 01/03/2025
Well shit, now what?
The top half of a page of instructions for building something I bought. It says:
KINDLY SUGGEST: THIS PRODUCT SHOULD BE ASSEMBLED BY A STRONG PERSON.
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 25/02/2025
I invested in an egg to top this Costco mini margherita pizza and it’s so good I’m gonna start trying to make everyone call me “chef”
A small margherita pizza (or the Costco version thereof) in the sunlight on a gray plate. It has a just-set egg on top of it. A slice has been cut out, revealing some yolk.
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 06/02/2025
How’s everybody doing?
A screenshot from Futurama. Bender (a robot) is telling Fry (a human) “I’m emotionally and electrically drained.”
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 02/02/2025
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 28/01/2025
Thank you for this. I am trying to read it but this button is stopping me :/
A screenshot of the article linked by the parent post. A blue “Sign up to be a member!” button obscures the first two or three letters of each line.
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 28/01/2025
This is unspeakably horrible, but all I can think of right now is that Matthew Lesko must be furious
The cover of the book Matthew Lesko’s 101 Best Government Grants in America. The cover is garish and themed like American paper money. In the center is a shield with the Stars and Stripes on a field of Lesko’s signature question marks. Superimposed on this is Matt himself, dressed like Uncle Sam, who appears to be screaming with some unidentifiable emotion as he hands you a red, white and blue gift-wrapped box. As if that wasn’t enough, it’s “As Seen On TV!”
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 27/01/2025
Just noticed Google Maps is helping shitty ghost kitchens hide their actual location by allowing them to appear as a delivery area geofence on the map with no location pin and no physical address.
A Google Maps screenshot from my browser, centered on Columbia, MD with an irregular polygon highlighted inside of a dashed line. At left is a sidebar for Mr. Beast Burger (3.4 stars with 78 reviews, delivery only, open 24 hours) featuring a web address and phone number, but no physical address.
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 20/01/2025
Here’s a suspicious breadstick I was served at a chain family restaurant.
A plate of dubious shrimp pasta with a suspiciously phallic breadstick on the side
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 17/01/2025
I had no particular subject in mind when i did this latte “art” but in hindsight I think I made an electric butt.
A steel mug of coffee next to a plate of cinnamon raisin toast. The foam on the coffee has the oddly distinct shape of a butt and lower back from behind, with what I see as an electrical cord snaking away from its left shoulder area. You’re welcome
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 14/01/2025
This week Slack joins the cacophony, with "sign up for AI" calls-to-action appearing intrusively throughout the interface. I am just so tired. Why should I bother writing carefully-thought-out stuff on Slack, Notion, etc. if people are only going to "read" an incorrect AI digest of it?
A crop from a screenshot of the Slack app interface. It says:
(stars icon) Summarize any conversation with Slack AI
Save time catching up on the 5 unread messages in this channel in just one click.

Below is a "Request Slack AI" button and a secondary link that says "Not now"
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 05/01/2025
New Gadsden flag just dropped
Printing on the top of a box shipped to me from China. It says “NO TRAMPLING” next to an illustration of a boot breaking a board with a circle and slash through it.
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 05/01/2025
I have always enjoyed this metaphor!
A TV news graphic. The left half is labeled “Taco Watch” illustrated by a number of ingredients for a (rather American) taco such as tortilla shells, cheese and an avocado. The right half is labeled “Taco Warning” and displays a finished taco ready to eat.
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 28/12/2024
After two decades of struggling with my relationship with food, my health and body image, I'm grateful to be able to finally try something different. Please wish me luck!
A vial of Zepbound (tirzepatide), a colorless injectable liquid, 2.5mg/0.5mL
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 26/12/2024
Fancy that, @kagi.com knows that it's Christmas!🎄
A screenshot of the search engine Kagi. The query is "is today christmas." The first result is a quick answer from Wolfram Alpha displaying "= yes"!
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 10/12/2024
Haha disregard that, I am no longer having fun
An error message:
ERROR in src/reader/stores/page.ts:37:9
TS2589: Type instantiation is excessively deep and possibly infinite.
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 02/12/2024
Expiring? Serves you guys right for making me a sandwich without asking me first when I’d be available to come eat it.
An iPhone notification from the Potbelly app. It says “Your free sandwich is expiring soon. So get it while it's still hot, but mostly while it's FREE, because you know, it's always hot. Tap to order”
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 17/11/2024
Is it possible for Bluesky to have *too much* juice?
A screenshot of my phone with the Apple App Store’s Free Apps chart. Bluesky is in the #1 spot. Threads is #4.
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 11/11/2024
Yesterday I hung out with @districtofkatya.bsky.social and played pinball for the first time. It was so cool. Much like my cat, pinball machines have no idea who the president-elect is, which is very comforting. Plus I got a MULTI-BALL!
A lineup of pinball machines such as Total Nuclear Annihilation, Eight Ball Deluxe, Memory Lane and Lord of the Rings
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 08/11/2024
Snakes... @nytimes.com, why did it have to be snakes?
A, let's say, creatively designed map visualization from the New York Times that is supposed to illustrate the swings of votes over the last 3 presidential elections, but instead just makes it look like the country is being overrun by snakes.
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 07/11/2024
I hadn't posted over there since 2021 but it still feels like a nice symbolic step.
A screenshot of my deactivated twitter/X.com account
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 07/11/2024
I’ve been trying to warn people about macroplastics IN OUR FOOD
A bowl of fried rice with a big jagged piece of clear plastic in it
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 05/11/2024
A photo of my Maryland “I voted / Yo voté” sticker.
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 28/10/2024
(In the style of the early ‘90s AT&T ads) “Have you ever sat in a virtual waiting room and a real waiting room…at the same time? You Will.”
Screenshot of a MedStar Health webpage stating “You are now in the virtual waiting room. Please hold while we connect you to your care team.”
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 25/10/2024
If anyone has thoughts on a less cowardly and ideally non-billionaire-based news source I could support, I'd love to hear.
A screenshot from the Washington Post website - "We've canceled your subscription"
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Justin @suckminimally.com · 17/09/2024
Late to the party, but very happy to be here. Maybe I’ll even start posting something now and then.
I’m Bluesky user number 3,028,138
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