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Structured Success

@structuredsuccess.ca
2.7K followers 104 following 1.7K posts

ADHD Coach & Academic Strategist | Guiding ADHD, autistic, and neurodivergent clients through lived experience | they/her | #AuDHD | www.structuredsuccess.ca

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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 07/08/2026
We need to stop seeing neurodevelopmental conditions (and mental health conditions) as character flaws. However, the response shouldn't be to frame them as gifts or superpowers. They can and do have negative impacts, but they can and do have neutral or even protective elements too at times
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 06/08/2026
Executive functioning isn't one skill, it's MANY that overlap and interact with one another. Learning to cope with executive dysfunction isn't as simple as learning one skill or accommodating one developmental gap. It's repeated, constant learning and adaptation over an entire lifetime
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 05/08/2026
Just like with all emotions, the goal can never to be stop feeling one emotion or exclusively feel another. The goal must be to identify when our anxiety or excitement is serving us and when it isn't; and when it isn't we need tools to mitigate the negative impacts they can bring (4/4)
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 05/08/2026
Excitement can be incredibly motivating, filling us with joy and creativity. However, it's motivating powers can encourage us to take risks that we might not otherwise. Excitement can also hyperfocus us, causing us to lose sight of our routines or day-to-day responsibilities (3/4)
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 05/08/2026
Of course, neither anxiety nor excitement is purely good or purely bad. Anxiety can be protective in some situations, encouraging us to be more risk aware and deliberate in our decisions. However, too much can be paralyzing, preventing us from making decisions or acting on our plans (2/4)
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 05/08/2026
Anxiety and excitement are two sides of the same coin. They're both energizing emotions often fueled by adrenaline. The difference is that anxiety focuses us on our worries, fears, and our past giving us energy to spiral, while excitement focuses us on our hopes, dreams, and our future (1/4)
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 03/08/2026
Everyone tells themselves a story to explain their thoughts, behaviours, and emotions. Recognizing that we're neurodivergent, or being diagnosed, changes this story; it can re-frame what we thought were moral failings as expected challenges or new strengths and weaknesses
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 02/08/2026
Some of these factors are outside of our control. Other's we can change with more or less difficulty. If we don't like an action that we've taken, assessing these influences on our behaviour can help us identify whether we can change it and how go about doing so.
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 02/08/2026
Behaviour does not occur in isolation. Internally, behaviour is affected by our goals, values, thoughts, feelings, and even bodily sensations. Externally, behaviour is affected by the situation, environment, social structures, and even social power.
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 01/08/2026
ADHD'ers tend to experience big, fast emotions that are more intense and easier to trigger than non-ADHD'ers. This also means that our emotions in response to other people's emotions can be bigger and faster too. If we aren't careful, this can make for vicious cycle that escalates conflict
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 31/07/2026
Social norms can be so hard for autistic folks. We know social norms exist, and we try to make rules based on our understanding of them. But they often feel like moving targets, like a complex, changing puzzle we need to constantly figure out
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 30/07/2026
The stories we tell ourselves to explain our thoughts, feelings, and actions are often more important than labels and diagnoses, I feel. If our stories disempower us or frame our struggles as moral failings, this can have major implications for our mental health and self-esteem
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 28/07/2026
As neurodivergent people, our first mission is to stop seeing ourselves as failed neurotypicals. Neurotypical standards are so ubiquitous that most neurodivergent people have internalized them to some extent. Measuring our success against these standards dooms to failure
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 27/07/2026
Being stressed, in pain, or emotional can make anyone emotionally vulnerable. For ADHD'ers, this is on top of our executive dysfunction, intense emotions, and rejection sensitivity. Sure, checking ourselves and emotionally regulating early and often helps, but it sure is exhausting
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Paul Howard @phoward8020.bsky.social · 25/07/2026
Awesome ideas! To add one of my own: for those of us who enjoy the shower experience but struggle with time blindness, get a waterproof digital clock with a countdown timer!
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 25/07/2026
The shower can be such an overwhelming place for folks with sensory issues, such as autistic folks. Remember! You're allowed to make it a better sensory experience. You can add music, incense, or galaxy projector. You're allowed to turn off the lights, reduce water pressure, or use a shower chair
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 25/07/2026
That is my lives mission: to know many things <3
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 24/07/2026
If you only do everything you "should" do, you will never have time for anything else… and you probably won't even finish everything you "should" do. It's just not possible. So why feel guilty for not finishing all of the things you (and others) tell yourself you should do?
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Lawyer in Beta dot com @lawyerinbeta.com · 23/07/2026
A big mindset change that’s helped me: accepting that I can change strategies! Accepting that a thing that used to work no longer works, bc something in my life changed! (This was a huge revelation! it feels so simple now in hindsight!)
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 23/07/2026
Finch is amazing for exactly that~ It's such a great tool
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 23/07/2026
And that's the kicker! Executive function supports aren't just for neurodivergent folks, either. They are for everyone! They help everyone! I'm so glad that y'all have found a system that helps keep goals visible, rewarding, and fun :) This is the best
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 23/07/2026
I completely and totally agree. Executive function supports are helpful for everyone too, not just neurodivergent folks, so having these tools in a way that isn't condescending would have such a huge audience, imo
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 23/07/2026
It's not childish to adapt child-focused ADHD strategies to work for you as an adult. Visual schedules, sticker charts, token economies, and other strategies get talked about as if they are only for kids, when they could help so many adults as well
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 22/07/2026
Autistic folks: Very few people actually care if you wear the same thing every day. Buy the 5 copies of the correct jeans. Get the comfortable shirt in every color. You got this.
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 20/07/2026
Hello boss...? I can't make it in today. The brain weasels won today and I am entirely at their mercy. ...please send help.
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 20/07/2026
In neurodivergent households people often have very different needs and struggles. Sometimes one person's needs can end up getting so much of the attention that other people's needs are left unmet. This can have long-term, lasting impacts on functioning
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 19/07/2026
Managing ADHD successfully isn't about being or acting like a neurotypical. Successful ADHD management is about accepting that we work differently, using our different strengths and weaknesses, and making progress towards our goals and living up to our values
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 18/07/2026
A lot of autistic people make internal rules to help reduce changing expectations and add predictability to unpredictable situations. Unfortunately, sometimes those internals rules can outlast their usefulness, and make us feel weird doing things we are very much allowed to do
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 16/07/2026
It's mindblowing how good my ADHD brain is at remembering that I forgot something, but NOT WHAT I ACTUALLY FORGOT. WHAT!?!
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 15/07/2026
Everyone likes to feel like their actions impact the world around them. Unfortunately, this can lead us to misattribute external factors beyond our control as direct consequences of our actions. This misattribution is fundamental to some experiences of OCD
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 14/07/2026
It's so weird how we moralize other people's behaviour, even when it's not harmful to anyone. People are lazy when they prioritize rest. People are careless because the don't prioritize the things we expect them to. It feels like we're talking about something else entirely, doesn't it?
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 12/07/2026
We need to plan for the life we have first, before planning for the one we want. We aren't going to wake up a different person tomorrow, so if you regularly need extra sleep, plan that in. If it needs to feel urgent to get out the door, set the remind 5 minutes before not an hour
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 12/07/2026
I feel the same way. In fact, it's one of the reasons why I have given up on trying to fight impulsivity directly ^^;
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 11/07/2026
My ADHD brain moves FAST, and that means that I can easily crowd people out of conversations if I'm not careful. To prevent this, I have to be super intentional about letting other people respond before I speak again, ESPECIALLY when I'm interested, passionate, or emotional
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 11/07/2026
Me: I've been wanting to do this for ages. Can I please just do it? Just a little bit? My executive function: No do. Only guilt.
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 10/07/2026
Being autistic changes how we communicate, how we solve problems, and how we navigate daily life. Learning that we are autistic, or being diagnosed, often changes all of this over again as we develop a better understanding of ourselves and how our brain works
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 09/07/2026
Why does this feel entirely accurate? It feels like a game of buff, if you can buff successfully, you can get away with it, but if you can't, you have to follow the rule
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 09/07/2026
Them: The rules are the rules… My autistic ass, making notes: *nods* Them: …unless they're more of a guideline… Me: *nodding slows* Them: …or everyone knows that it's not ACTUALLY a rule Me: wait… WHAT!?!?
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 08/07/2026
Wild take. Taking care of yourself is better than not taking care of yourself. There are plenty of times we think "it'd be better if I did it in the morning" or "it'd be better if I did it when I…" STOP! Taking care of yourself now is better than putting it off for some idea of perfect self-care
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 07/07/2026
Yes, I lost my keys again. That's the consequence, but what led up to it? Was it distraction, limitations in our working memory, a subconscious drive toward efficiency? Rather than fighting these, can we change the steps so they are less likely to derail us?
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 07/07/2026
We need to stop focusing exclusively on consequences when it comes to managing ADHD. We need to understand how we got to that outcome. If we change these, we may be able to change the result for the next time. For example:
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 06/07/2026
I didn't catch that typo because I rely on a screenreader to read, and they sound the same when read aloud. Unfortunately, once you pointed it out, there really isn't much I could have done about it. I couldn't edit the post, for example
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 06/07/2026
If you ask me, the hardest part of accommodating the way your neurodivergent brain works isn't finding the strategies or tools. It's learning to accept that you need the strategies or tools and that it doesn't change your value as a person
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 05/07/2026
Hi. What were you trying to accomplish with this reply exactly?
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 05/07/2026
It's almost never only one person who has ADHD in a family. When one person is diagnosed, it's SO common for parents and siblings to also figure out that their ADHD too. This is the power of knowing what ADHD actually looks like… and, well, genetics
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 04/07/2026
Psst. There is no rule that you have to do self-care in a specific way. If it helps you, do it. Yes, even if that means drinking coffee because you can't get yourself to drink water. Yes, even if you brush your teeth at 2pm rather than in the morning
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 03/07/2026
Welcome to ADHD club. The first rule of ADHD club is store things where you're going use them~! ...did you think I was going to say something else?
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 03/07/2026
A lot of ADHD'ers process information verbally. It can be a super effective strategy, but it also a vulnerable state because our thoughts are still forming and changing. Choosing when, where, and with whom it's safe to be this vulnerable is key to it's success
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 02/07/2026
Neurodivergent success can't be only be measured by neurotypical standards
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Structured Success @structuredsuccess.ca · 02/07/2026
I use three: 1) Move my hand like I'm writing something. That's my right hand 2) Imagine I'm driving, if I have to turn across traffic, that's left 3) Find my only non-double-jointed finger. That's my right hand Of course, this doesn't work for everyone. I don't know what a universal tip would be
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