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Mike Ely

@social.taupehat.com
16 followers 1 following 853 posts

Technologist, dad, author, ally if you want one. Writing site used to update weekly. "The limits of what you are willing to imagine are an epitaph you wrote for your […] 🌉 bridged from ⁂ social.taupehat.com/@me, follow @ap.brid.gy to interact

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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 08/10/2026
It's true. There's a box in my garage that has to be maintained at 9/8th capacity or else the world will stop spinning on its axis.
Product Preferences 
Maintains consistent electronics and cable inventory
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 04/10/2026
#Halloween decorations starting to come together.
Four mock tombstones glow with vivid colors under a UV light. They read, in order: 
Gone 4 now
For rent
RIP
See you soon

Behind the mock tombstones is a raised bed with flower pots in it. Atop one of the pots is a skeletal cat, back raised and apparently snarling. Nearby a skeletal bird sits watch over a nest with a pair of skeletal chicks, and off to the side is a creepy doll with a button for one eye. The cat, the birds and the doll's eye and hair all glow brightly.A closer look at the cat and birds from the previous photo, in which it can be seen that the bird's head was replaced by a human skull.A wreath consisting of a couple dozen tiny ghosts chasing one another in a circle glows bright green under a UV light
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 25/09/2026
At this point I have done this so many times.
Back to school bingo card.

Row 1:
"Can you all hear me?"
PTA wants money
"This is my first time doing this "

Row 2:
PTA wants volunteers 
Mention of school mascot (free square) 
"I SPEAK REALLY LOUDLY"

Row 3:
Tepid applause (x50)
You're in the wrong classroom
Teacher pretends to know your kid
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 24/09/2026
When the boss says "follow the instructions exactly as I wrote them" and I do:
A curb in Laramie, WY is being painted yellow by a city employee who is visible wearing high-visibility gear in the distance. The curb is painted yellow, along with significant portions of the sidewalk, street, gutter, a plant growing between the cracks in the pavement, the wheels of a couple bicycles locked up on the sidewalk, etc.
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 22/09/2026
One of my favorite pastimes on social media is blocking Trump supporters. Say something that supports him, I block you. Click the like button on a post supporting Trump, I block you. So as you can imagine I see a lot of profiles of guys holding dead fish […] [Original post on social.taupehat.com]
Partially redacted Facebook profile of a person named Roy, who lives in California.

Business description:
"Owner-Operator at The Third Reich Motorcycle Restoration and Owner/Operator at (redacted) Motorsports
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 13/09/2026
Here's how I imagine the conversation went: "Your time is up. You're eighty years old, you've had at least one stroke, your health is failing, your final term ends in two years, and you are in competition with Vladimir Putin as the most despised person […] [Original post on social.taupehat.com]
Screencap from RTÉ with headline reading "President Connolly expressed 'strong view' of Irish people on war and genocide to Trump"

Photo shows Donald Trump walking ahead of Catherine Connolly as both leave Áras an Uachtaráin. President Connolly has a bit of a grin or slight smirk on her face. President Trump looks acutely uncomfortable and angry.
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 11/09/2026
At least this one is solvable, even if a bit too much so...
Tweet from Aanya @xoaanya:
"insane levels of vibe coding"

Screenshot:
Account Verification
We have just sent the code 435841 to your
phone number: xxx-xxx-6521
Please enter the code below to access your
account:
(six empty text frames appear)

Retweet from Monoculture Debatteur @NotADebacle:
"Zero factor authentication"
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 11/09/2026
I feel bad for people who need diesel for their work vehicles. On the other hand I am enthralled at the impact this has had on the coal-rolling douchebags around here. Gasbuddy, filtered for diesel fuel:
Map from gasbuddy.com showing diesel fuel prices in and around Santa Rosa, CA. Prices range from $7.69 to $8.69 per gallon.
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 09/09/2026
I was always a big fan of Spock's approximate precision. #startrek
Four-panel photomontage from Star Trek: The Original Series. The upper panel, lower left, and lower center panel all show Mr. Spock leaning over to peer into the "science vizor" - a device which shines bright blue light onto his face. The bottom right panel shows him still leaning over but with his head turned toward the camera. A caption has been added which reads "Captain, the Romulan vessel will impact Enterprise in approximately 12.4397 seconds."
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 02/09/2026
In this episode of "Stuff you don't see every day" or, why it's good to have an ear for unusual aircraft noises
A large white airship lumbers through a cloudy sky. Some trees and phone lines are visible in the foreground.Screencap from https://globe.adsbexchange.com/?icao=a06751 showing the flight path of N125LT, an airship described as "2023 Pathfinder 1 LTA Research and Exploration LLC"
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 31/08/2026
Walking away from Google like
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 31/08/2026
I did enjoy telling them that I was leaving.
Google search box. Search query is "migrate custom domain from gmail to proton"
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 27/08/2026
"colder"
Weather forecast: 
90°F in Santa Rosa tomorrow 
4° colder than today
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 26/08/2026
This has been puzzling me. Not that I care much about this dumbass rich guy or his inability to get laid without paying $140 to someone working out of a trailer park in Ohio but... based on my experience rich guys have a fixer to procure prostitutes […] [Original post on social.taupehat.com]
A 46-year-old white man with short dark hair and several days of beard growth stands for a mugshot wearing an orange top. An image caption reads "San Francisco 49ers owner arrested"
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 22/08/2026
[uspol] I finally figured out who Scott Bessent reminded me of.
Scott Bessent is wearing an American flag pin on the lapel of his grey suit with grey tie and white shirt as he speaks outside in front of a cluster of microphones. Inset to the right of the photo is a headshot of the character Overseer Benjamin from the Fallout TV series. Leaving aside the fact that Overseer Benjamin is a cyclops with one eye in the center of his face, the resemblance between the two men is striking.
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 19/08/2026
Rohnert Park, California. Holden SS-V. Rebadged or real? #cars
Dashcam snapshot of a black Holden Commodore SS-V at a traffic light. To the left of it is a white California Highway Patrol cruiser also waiting on the red light.
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 17/08/2026
[#uspol mention of drug abuse] The President of the United States is a crackhead.
"Truth Social" post from Donald Trump:

Based on my very good relationship with Kim
Jong Un, of North Korea, I am not happy with the
fact that the United States has, long ago, agreed
to participate in Joint Military Exercises with
South Korea. These exercises are not only costly,
with much of these costs paid for by the United
States of America (as usual!), but send a signal
that is totally inappropriate and hostile, to a
Country that, as long as Donald J. Trump has
been President, has been unthreatening and
respectful. Therefore, and based on the fact that
it is too late to cancel, I have instructed Secretary
of War, Pete Hegseth, to substantially reduce the
Joint Military Exercises! While somewhat
unrelated (?), I recently asked the President of
South Korea if they would like to join us in the
Denuclearization of the Islamic Republic of Iran,
and they said, “No thanks!” Thank you for your
attention to this matter. President DONALD J.
TRUMP
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 13/08/2026
Not like us.
4-panel meme template. Left column is Drake doing the "avoid/welcome" meme. Top right panel shows Donald Trump asleep in the Oval office asleep with the caption "Staying awake during boring work meetings." Bottom-right panel shows Trump alertly watching a very young girl at the Patriot Games with the caption "Staying awake with preteen children around."
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 12/08/2026
I'm so sick of this stupid fucking thing. Shouldn't it go in for a C-check or something? It's CONSTANTLY in the air over downtown. How much fuel cost does it absorb?
Screencap from adsbexchange.com showing N108SC, a Bell 407, circling at low altitude for fucking ever over downtown Santa Rosa, which is pretty much does 24/7
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 06/08/2026
So the other day I actually read the sign at the gym about locker room rules (sign is outside the locker room, don't worry). One of those rules is not like the others, all I can say.
A blue sign on a beige wall reads as follows:

Locker Room Rules:
Cell phone use is not allowed
We're not responsible for lost or stolen items
Absolutely no photography
Lockers are to be used daily and during workouts only. Unauthorized locks will be clipped nightly
Don't forget to put on clothes before exiting
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 31/07/2026
It's getting funky, getting funky! #woodsidefire
Map from purpleair.com showing absolutely deplorable air quality in and near Santa Rosa, California
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 31/07/2026
This thing kept alerting tonight and it's a browser-only interface. Turns out I don't have the right browser for it though, so I took it out of production. #sysadmin #bofh The right browser:
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 27/07/2026
One of my favorite places in the world, still lovely after all these years.
A panographic photo of a beach. Visible in the far distance to the left and emerging from the mist is the hulk of Morro Rock, and slightly to the left of that are the three smokestacks of the retired power plant. To the right is a low bluff with a few houses, which appear to be a few hundred yards away. The sun is setting over the Pacific ocean below clear skies. Despite the beach stretching on for miles, there are perhaps a dozen people visible in the entire photo.
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 25/07/2026
The bureau at this completely lovely vacation home is making me go 😦 Tell me this isn't OCD...
A nice wooden bureau with sixteen ornate pulls, five of which are installed in an opposite orientation to the rest.
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 24/07/2026
Anyhow the vacation continues as intended.
A large black lab mix trots happily through the shallow water ahead of an ocean wave on a beautiful, nearly-empty beach.
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 23/07/2026
A sand dollar (Dendraster excentricus) test sits upon the sand of a beach somewhere.
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 18/07/2026
Beancounter: "We can save buckets of money by using AI to pick thumbnails for news headlines." Bari Weiss: "Ship it!"
Headline from CBS News: "Taylor farms pulls iceberg lettuce linked to cyclosporiasis outbreak"
The accompanying photo is a picture of Taylor Swift hugging Travis Kelce in a football stadium. Based on what people are wearing, the weather is cold, the crowd is very sparse and Kelce is wearing a t-shirt rather than his uniform, all suggesting the photo was taken either before or after a game.
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 10/07/2026
My daughter asked me if I was still at the gym. My reply:
A selfie of a middle-aged guy wearing a black t-shirt and glasses. He has a full beard on the shaggy side and long hair pulled up in a messy bun. Behind him is a bunch of gym equipment.
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 15/06/2026
When #git tries to tell me I should do a "git pull" right after a rebase. #sysadmin
A monarch butterfly flutters through the air, with nothing behind it but blue sky. Meme text surrounding it says "Last time I ate one of these I got hella sick"
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 15/06/2026
Pretty sure Steven Cheung wrote that response to The Weather Channel. He can suck it lol.
Tweet from The Weather Channel:
The Weather Channel @weatherchannel - 4h
UFC Freedom 250 is facing a chaotic weather setup on the White House South
Lawn, with a 60% chance of thunderstorms, heavy downpours, and wind gusts
up to 34 mph threatening to delay the outdoor fights. On top of the storm risk,
brutal D.C. humidity is driving a triple-digit heat

Quote-tweeted by Rapid Response 47, with the accompanying text:
Rapid Response 47 @RapidResponse47
This event is about celebrating America’s unmatched greatness after
250 years — which apparently doesn’t sit well with the friendless loser
who wrote this bullshit clickbait headline.
Rain or shine, we're celebrating our great country no matter what. GOD
BLESS AMERICA! UFC Freedom 250 logo above text saying "Event delayed due to weather"
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 12/06/2026
[uspol, also kinda gross (but very funny!)] The Texas GOP apparently thought it would be a good idea to bring the symbol of their party into the convention hall. Said creature clearly expressed its opinion of the experience. #uspol
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 10/06/2026
Some #dogs are terrified of the robot vacuum. Ours is an obstacle alert. He's pretty permanent, so I'm not sure if he's an obstacle at all...
Roomba app asking about an "obstacle" showing the vacuum camera view of a room with a large black dog laying around looking unbothered. The classification options given from the app are: "Temporary obstacle here," "Add Keep Out Zone," "No obstacle here" and finally "I'm not sure"
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 08/06/2026
"aunty and them" shoulda known better. Guess which finger. 😅 #genx
Text message and reply:
"aunty and them say you look like jerry garcia"
"Tell them I have one too many fingers to look like Jerry."
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 28/05/2026
Today in "Fuck you Atlassian" we have "haha can't type a perl module without it getting turned into a smiley haha, isn't that great for communication?" #sysadmin #angrysysadmin
Snippet of text from a Jira entry which should have read "IIRC it looked like Data::Dumper output..." but stupid fucking Atlassian turned it into "IIRC it looked like Data:😀umper output..."
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 26/05/2026
Our storage hardware: #sysadmin
The musician Nas with the word "true" captioned above him.
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 23/05/2026
This is like the Stroop Test of reaction memes:
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 22/05/2026
Does look like the face of a man who would deliberately drive his Cybertruck into a lake? Does this look like the face of a man whose actual government name is "Jimmy Jack McDaniel?" If you answered yes to both, you're right! […] [Original post on social.taupehat.com]
A mugshot of a 70-year-old white man. He is nearly bald, with whisps of white hair and a neatly-trimmed mustache and beard. He is wearing rectangular wire-rimmed eyeglasses and a striped polo shirt.
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 13/05/2026
The office free table today. I'll note that what we do has absolutely nothing to do with automotive repair. Nor do I know what this alternator would fit.
An alternator sits in a box cushioned by bubble wrap upon a wooden table in an office.
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 08/05/2026
Classic #dog move: put what's important to him with the things he believes are important to his people. I thought he was just nosing around in the dirty clothes hamper like he often does. Nope - he was sharing!
A nearly empty washing machine containing a few items of (clean) clothing and a bright green dog ball (also clean).
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 30/04/2026
(found media elsewhere) This is actually accurate, in the sense that the white streaks in the sky you see behind airplanes are pretty much pure dihydrogen monoxide. #avgeek
A half-liter clear plastic bottle is held in the hand of someone. In the background and slightly out of focus is a medium-sized business jet, specifically a Bombardier 650. The red label on the bottle advertises its contents as:
Chemtrail Fluid
Aviation Use Only
Dihydrogen Monoxide
There is then a NFPA diamond describing the content hazard levels as 0 health, 0 flammability, 0 instability. In the special hazard square, the chemical formula H2O is displayed. Below that there are six checkboxes which could be used to indicate the purpose of the "chemtrail fluid" including: mind control, sterilization, memory erase, cloud seed, paranoia and covid-19. Below the checkboxes is the text:
Property of US Government
Natural Spring Water 16.9 FL OZ (500 ML)
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 27/04/2026
Guess we're walking!
Google maps output showing trip times of 15 hours by bus, 5 hours by foot.
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 24/04/2026
Happy Friday fellow #sysadmin types.
Very dramatic cartoon-style tableflip with stuff flying around and people fleeing. The table being flipped is labeled "tailscale" and the person doing the flipping is labeled "me"
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 23/04/2026
How dare I try to mount a 2.5GB ISO image from a vendor? Fuck #Windows - if this software ran on literally anything else it would be.
Snip from Windows Task Manager showing Antimalware Service Executable dragging 18.3% of CPU, by far the top user.
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 22/04/2026
"I am an extraordinarily brilliant person." Dunning and Kruger nod and take notes...
Post on "Truth" Social

@realDonaldTrump
A RIGGED ELECTION TOOK PLACE LAST NIGHT IN THE GREAT
COMMONWEALTH OF VIRGINIA! All day long Republicans were
winning, the Spirit was unbelievable, until the very end when, of
course, there was a massive “Mail In Ballot Drop!” Where have |
heard that before — And the Democrats eked out another
Crooked Victory! Six to five goes to ten to one, and yet the
Presidential Election in November was very close to a 50-50
split. In addition to everything else, the language on the
Referendum was purposefully unintelligible and deceptive. As
everyone knows, | am an extraordinarily brilliant person, and even
I had no idea what the hell they were talking about in the
Referendum, and neither do they! Let's see if the Courts will fix
this travesty of “Justice.” President DONALD J. TRUMP
1.37k ReTruths 4.22k Likes Apr 22, 2026, 1:34 PM
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 22/04/2026
[uspol/antisemitism] #california will always live up to its reputation. This is in the paper voter's guide for the 2026 election. Yes, this man is on the ballot. Sorry ladies and gents, he's taken! 😂
TW: ANTISEMITISM.
Candidate statement from the 2026 California Voter Guide for one Don J. Grundmann, no qualified party preference.
Statement:
Kirk murdered by shaped-charge bomb Israel used. Government knows. YouTube—Why Kirk had to die. Israel murdered Liberty sailors. Israel “art students” wired Twin Towers for 9/11.controlled demolition. Planes did NOT destroy towers. Israel did. 3,000 murdered to create new “Pearl Harbor” to justify fighting wars for Israel. “Dancing Israelis” (Mossad agents) prove knowledge of attack. Government knows. Israel (our greatest enemy), NOT Iran, will suitcase nuke U S. via “Samson Option”—false flag attack to blame on Iran/Russia and permanently end our nation. Israel, the REAL terrorists, created and funds Hamas via Qatar. Countless war crimes by Israel/Netanyahu. No further funding for Israel. They call Palestinians AND Christians AND America “Amalek”—their sworn forever enemy. We are “goyim” (less than human animals/cattle) that they will enslave. We are stupid chumps. Israel rules our conquered Republic. Talmud—their Bible—says Christ boiling in in Israel allowed/planned/promoted Hamas attack (they murdered their own people) to justify genocide and steal billion$ in Gaza oil/gas rights. Christian Zionism = soul poison. Talmudic “Judeo-Christian values” don’t exist . . . (several websites, mostly antisemitic, follow)
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 21/04/2026
Official topic item for this week's meeting agenda. Gotta slow our roll a bit, getting sloppy. #sysadmin
Photo of Mark Zuckerberg with the quote "Move fast break things"

Overlaid is a sloppy red X and the word "no!"
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 19/04/2026
I mean, goatse is still a thing right? No need for computer malware, wrecking the brain of some asshole works even better! Put that on your QR code t-shirt for extra good times. Meta creeptacles not required.
Photo of Meta smart glasses. Caption:
"Meta sparks privacy fears after unveiling $299 smart glasses with hidden cameras: 'You can now film everyone without them knowing'"

Response from millenianthemus:
"I want a shirt that has a QR code for some kind of horrible malware so that if anyone ever tries to film me in public their phone will automatically scan the code and be reduced to a functionless brick"

Reply to that from iwasrightaboutthesun:
"Modern day Medusa"
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 19/04/2026
Somebody put this out at my daughter's birthday party. I've been wanting to do this for years. (See alt text for clue if needed)
A bowl of (mostly) m&ms sits next to a bowl of (mostly) Skittles
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 17/04/2026
I just want to thank the archaic stuck-in-the-1800s-literally US banking system for making this the most reliable way to pay for a used car that you're not financing. It was hella fun carrying this on BART, let me tell you.
95 $100 bills are fanned out across a grey background.
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Mike Ely @social.taupehat.com · 15/04/2026
Today in "stuff you probably don't see everyday" we have a helicopter suspending a basket with line workers maintaining a transmission tower.
A blue and white helicopter hovers just above an electrical transmission tower. A line hangs from the helicopter suspending a basket (largely obscured by the tower) containing two people who are doing maintenance on the tower.
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