iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 25/12/2025

i hope anyone who ends up seeing this is at least doing alright; this time of year is always hard enough as it is…

⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 25/12/2025

still alive, btw ;-; bluesky keeps logging me out my phone, so i end up not coming onto here… but i’ve somehow made it through another year—despite everything :,) … ugh,… live has really been so, so hard still to cope with, but… i’m still trying to push through..

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 22/06/2025

so hopefully something good comes of that. idk there’s just so much shit wrong with me. and with the world. and i just want to be able to live again. and for everyone else to be able to live again.

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 22/06/2025

… but after not getting an answer since february about it, i finally have a meeting scheduled to speak with my voc. rehab counselor this upcoming wednesday to update my case’s details and my needs/medical status (as my health has deteriorated significantly since our last meeting back in 2023)

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 22/06/2025

i’m just in borderline-unmanageable pain (when it comes to emotional distress & frustration and depression surrounding my current state & reality) and there’s many other negatives about my current situation

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 22/06/2025

i have had to get 4 separate imaging tests done (an x-ray of my hips and for my spine; an mri of my hips; a pelvic ultrasound) i’ve had more med changes/additions i have to get an injection in my right hip i have been unable to sit upright for much longer than an hour at a time

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 22/06/2025

btw: when stating “things have been worse” i meant that in the past things have felt worse than they felt upon making this post that being said, the past few weeks have been… somewhat worse.

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 22/05/2025

hello bluesky …. i keep forgetting to come on here ~_~ … things have been a lot busier for me lately and medication changes have been going on fairly consistently but overall, things have been… worse, i guess ? but i am still alive so there’s that :,) wishing for the best

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 11/03/2025

i’ve kept fighting and working on getting adequate help for myself and for what?… it hasn’t changed anything much—i’ve just been deteriorating slightly less fast

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 11/03/2025

don’t know what to do anymore. just end up crying by the end of most days. hope for the improvement of my wellbeing feels less and less likely to happen

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 11/03/2025

not kidding when i express how my health just keeps getting worse and worse—so unbelievably suffocating…

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 11/03/2025

had to have a small-ish operation last thursday which is making me limp even worse than i already was.

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Reposted by ⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎

inder 🍎 @rednimi.bsky.social · 08/03/2025

🐶🤖

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Reposted by ⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎

Pegushi 🔜 SacAnime Summer AA153 @pegushi.bsky.social · 24/02/2025

Throw back to the very first stamp washi I made #merch #fish #nightmarket

Stamp shaped tape on envelope, with pictures of coral, mackrel, crab, giant clam, swordfish, waves, shrimp, nautilus and tai on various stamps

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Reposted by ⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎

binary sunrise @clarascintilla.bsky.social · 24/02/2025

Southern skies

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 24/02/2025

if i ever for whatever reason actually do have kids of my own i hope and pray to god i never fucking end up treating them the way my mother treats me.

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 19/02/2025

this world just keeps proving it isn’t a place for me

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 19/02/2025

i want to live happily and be safe and love but it’s all just not meant to happen for me and my family everyone is suffering and so are too too too many others and it’s all too suffocating and i can’t handle anything anymore

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 19/02/2025

not to be ultra depressing and su*c*dal but i just don’t want to be alive so so so badly because they life i have been living is miserable in many many many ways my family and i cannot fuckijg catch a break everyone is sick and dying and unwell and it wont stop and i cant handle it very much more

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 19/02/2025

there’s just… horrifying implications based on what i’m symptomatically experiencing and it makes me too my stomach with fear and frustration and grief and pain

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 19/02/2025

yeah so trying to look up info about (h)EDS is literally the most gut-wrenching shit because of too many reasons to explain but part of why it hurts is because there really are no solid answers. no cure. no specialists—at least, none that are nearby and won’t cost an arm and a leg.

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 19/02/2025

i’ll ask my dad tomorrow or something about that to see what he thinks i guess i also am probably going to try a different pain management place then my hospital’s referral bc of a few reasons… but idrk how to go about the timing of that??…. idk i’m just still confused on when to do things…

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 19/02/2025

i don’t know if im good to reschedule with the PA now???…… or not….?? cause she said to reschedule once i had the MRI and labs (bloodwork) done but idk if i need to wait for them to process the results yet for the bloodwork b4 trying to reschedule???

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 19/02/2025

② i got some bloodwork done (as ordered by the same lady who ordered the MRI to check for like 8 inflammatory markers/etc).

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 19/02/2025

(i’ll try to look for the report one of the patient portals tomorrow and see if it’s there to try and learn more info)

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 19/02/2025

a couple updates: ① the doctors office called me this morning (when i was still asleep) and left a voicemail saying that according to the MRI for my spine, i have disk bulging in “the L4 to L5 and L5 to S1”… sooooooooim going to be referred for physical therapy (yet again). so that’s…… yeah idk

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Reposted by ⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎

yappari @yappari.bsky.social · 19/02/2025

💙 #commission #art #illustration

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Reposted by ⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎

Embra✦Vol @embraquil.bsky.social · 17/10/2024

this came to me in a dream last month... #Neopets | #Fanart | #HatsuneMiku | #Teto

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 11/02/2025

it’s hard to give a solid answer as there’s many variables, but it’s… not cheap, for sure

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 11/02/2025

i feel like i’ll probably end up dying soon if things keep getting worse and almost no one will notice or know and it’s really sad and terrifying but i deserve that for disappearing because of my issues

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 11/02/2025

i dont know why i keep posting updates because i mostly post them to try and give context to others and also keep track for myself but i know most everyone doesnt want to read them or anything

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 09/02/2025

it’s only been 26 days since my last physical therapy session… not even a month and my entire body and pain level has gone to shit i don’t know what to do anymore staying in bed will make me even weaker but i don’t have any other options

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 09/02/2025

so even when i try to rest my spine and crochet in bed my right hand + arm is not doing well i just… almost can’t do anything, let alone anything i enjoy without worsening my pain and it’s gotten so much worse so quickly i’m really really so so terrified and tired of all of this

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 09/02/2025

i’m really really hoping the MRI i’m having for my spine this thursday helps me understand what’s wrong also, i need to figure out how to address the issue with my right pointer finger as i tried drawing last week and that has left me with more pain from my finger down my forearm…

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 09/02/2025

i’ve been becoming increasingly bed-ridden for the past week… it’s getting to be too painful to endure sitting upright due to my spine & shoulder blades and my hip is making standing / walking very difficult… its affecting both of my knees and my left foot (as of how i have to limp when walking)

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 07/02/2025

this is probably too vague to really make much sense but essentially my health is worse than a lot of health professionals want to be transparent about (aside from the lady i saw yesterday who is my general doctors’s assistant). which is… both validating and terrifying

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 07/02/2025

also i don’t want to go into detail but i had another (general) doctors appointment yesterday and there were some very very troubling things i was informed about in regards to my health that the cardiologist decided to not tell me about... but in some ways i also received validation for things

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 07/02/2025

i feel like it says a lot that my brother made my ringtone be the song that plays when you find a crying toad in luigi’s mansion

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Reposted by ⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎

Rafael Motta (encomendas abertas) @rafamotta.bsky.social · 06/02/2025

Mais uma ilustra da minha oc, Bisq #art #BRart #oc #manga

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 31/01/2025

again i’m sorry for all of this im just so scared and have no answers for pain management yet even though it’s been years and i just want to be okay

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 31/01/2025

i have to leave the house tomorrow for therapy but i don’t want to go because im so drained but i already had to reschedule this appointment so i don’t want to not go

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 31/01/2025

i have to try and sleep because it’s almost 1am and i’m so exhausted been awake since before 6:30 this morning because i couldn’t fall back asleep and cried far too much from stress today already and i keep just crying

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 31/01/2025

i’m sorry for all of these words but i’m really terrified and scared because this gut feeling is getting strong and stronger as the years of this pain start passing by with no proper help

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 31/01/2025

doctors keep not listening to my words and they are never thorough and don’t believe how severe this all is i don’t want to have to fall apart in front of their eyes for them to believe me

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⛓️★•🚏levi ⛲️☀︎ @sleepylev.bsky.social · 31/01/2025

i really need to get help and don’t know how to or where to go because scans are expensive even with insurance and i don’t want to put my parents in debt because of my health im so scared

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