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ShortEye

@shorteye.bsky.social
307 followers 570 following 455 posts

'Hey Alex, you know the great thing about television...if anything really important happens anywhere in the world, night or day, you can always change channel.' NUFC 🖤🤍🖤🤍🖤🤍

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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
Now there’s an incentive to row/paddle that little bit quicker!! Mind you, nothing makes me swim faster in a river than a piece of floating, pink toilet paper!!
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
On the bright side #nufc, we’re winning the hair stakes! From keeper to manager, some shocking barnets in that Leeds dressing room!
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
There is no getting away from the fact that Gabriel really is a proper knob!
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 30/08/2026
Other than the Ipswich defence, is Old Trafford’s drainage system still leaking as well?
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 30/08/2026
Pawson man, get in the fucking bin….! You’ve single-handedly done #itfc dirty there!!! The Greek Policeman’s favourite pats it down into his own path, you had FECK ALL ELSE to look at, and you still can’t blow?!?!
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 30/08/2026
Unashamedly stolen from FB!! 🤣🤣🤣 #nufc
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 30/08/2026
Wifey just came and asked why I haven’t got out of bed yet…… I went full-on Savio and blamed it on ‘muscle fatigue’….! 🤣🤣🤣
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 30/08/2026
I think I may have unearthed why Spurs are having issues…..!!! This spectacular example of spunkonionship may have something to do with It. Maybe concentrate your efforts elsewhere, bellend!! #nufc 🤍🖤
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 30/07/2026
In football, things like this are inevitable, and the reasons can be debated to the moon and back without ever knowing the truth. Sir Eddie and his team did us proud for a while. Celebrate that. Very few people had him on their ‘new manager bingo card’. Gaffer, best wishes for the future, & thanks
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Count Binface @countbinface.bsky.social · 27/07/2026
Here it is. My manifesto for the 2026 Clacton By-Election. It's a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. Join me, clean up Clacton and let's make 13th August Bin Day! #VoteBinface #VoteyMcVoteface #YesWeTinCan
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 23/07/2026
Mull never disappoints!! Slianté!
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 11/06/2026
I hope this game isn’t as long and drawn out as those two anthems! #worldcup
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 05/06/2026
Some serious digging in and building a lead by England here……..!!!! 🤷🏻‍♂️🙈🤬 That said, I’ve prepared a better track in my back garden!!!
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 19/05/2026
#IPL Sooryavanshi is the Luke Littler of cricket!
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 12/05/2026
“I would love it if Tripps starts in goal against West Ham!”
static.klipy.com
Kevin Keegan's Passionate 'Beat Them' Rant
ALT: Kevin Keegan's Passionate 'Beat Them' Rant
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 10/05/2026
If CaVARnagh is sent to look at that, he can then see Rice fouling first. Holding, not once but twice before any arm across Reyes. Not once, but twice….!!! He rules out the goal to give the pen and books Rice! 🤷🏻‍♂️ Explain it to me otherwise!
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 06/05/2026
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 24/04/2026
Alex Neil pleading foul for that Souter goal #LCFC 🤣🤣🤣🤣! PROPER HEADER!!
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 24/04/2026
In fairness, I’d be as chuffed as he is if I dropped that amount of 💩 after a long day hiking!!
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Mandeville was cavendish_maid 📎 🇺🇦 @mandeville24.bsky.social · 15/04/2026
Keep voting! www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article...
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 12/04/2026
#nufc
media.tenor.com
a red sign says self destruction imminent please evacuate facility
ALT: a red sign says self destruction imminent please evacuate facility
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 09/04/2026
Gorgeous out there again today.! The dogs are out there somewhere, but rabbits are far more interesting apparently!
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 23/03/2026
Add up injuries, suspensions, loss of form for some, but never overlook this one, undeniable fact. The one person where it took the seriousness of pneumonia to prevent him working. 3 matches he missed, 3 matches!! He has lived & breathed this club since the day he walked in. Show some respect! #nufc
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 04/03/2026
Peter Wankes and Paul Tierney are the Laurel and Hardy of PGMOL! #nufc
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 22/02/2026
So all this bollox about #nufc felt that BDB ‘may have’ been pushed into an offside position…….! No ‘may have’ about it. Clear as day.
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Omg. WTF is Happening? @lalahaenzy.bsky.social · 05/02/2026
Sir Ian McKellen performing a monologue from Shakespeare’s Sir Thomas More on the Stephen Colbert show. Never have I heard this monologue performed with such a keen sense of prescience. Nor have I ever been in this exact historical moment.TY Sir Ian, for reaching us once again. #Pinks #ProudBlue
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 30/01/2026
My wife got 2 cinema tickets for Melania yesterday. While walking the dog this morning, I ceremoniously nailed mine to a tree! Went back tonight and someone has nicked the nail!!!
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 18/01/2026
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 14/01/2026
Humour me…. If Gyokeres doesn’t withdraw his knee it deflects into the goal off him. However the act of withdrawing said knee isn’t deemed going active! This in comparison with the farce that arose out of Haaland/Thiaw smacks a little bit of double standards!
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 13/01/2026
I wasn’t up with the Trafford boo boys tonight, but jealousy gets you nowhere fellas! His footwork for the Wissa header save, and the distance he gets kicking off the floor is streets ahead of Popey. It wasn’t a bad volley technique either!
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 13/01/2026
2-0 is always a dangerous lead. Next goal wins…! BDB hat trick!!
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 13/01/2026
Wissa mate, what the actual fuck are you about tonight?
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 09/01/2026
I just followed a Keith Downie #nufc link about Fab’s ankle. Unfortunately it took me to the festering grokspot. Within 4 posts it reminded me why I left. What an absolute cesspit!
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 08/01/2026
Dear Newcastle United, Please can I apply for this man’s stewarding role. He is clearly a Mackem, or some other form of imposter. Either replace him, or remind him that if he was that up-close-and-personal after that, he should at least have a fucking smile on his face! #nufc
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 07/01/2026
The noise when that went in was insane! Just hope Brenda 3 seats down was hanging her head in shame on Barrack Road after leaving on 95 minutes!
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Memecastle United FC @memecastleunited.bsky.social · 07/01/2026
You score 3? We'll score 4. That one's for you Kev 👑
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 30/12/2025
Justin Hood, I’m coming for a Kung Po on opening night!! #pdc #darts #doubletrouble
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 29/12/2025
OK..!! You got me!! #pdc #darts #paddypower
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 18/12/2025
Hats off David Munyua!!!!! 🇰🇪 That was brilliant!!! #pdcdarts #darts
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 13/12/2025
Norwich Shitty fans singing, ‘You’re not fit to referee’ when they’re winning as a result of him missing the handball that gave them the lead, is as amusing as it is ironic!
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 13/12/2025
Happy 100th Birthday to the man responsible for my favourite Dick Pic! Congratulations Dick Van Dyke!
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 11/12/2025
This is insane!!!! The Orange Man Baby will probably fill it with all his pals! Anyone remember Berlin 1936!! www.bbc.co.uk/sport/footba...
bbc.co.uk
World Cup ticket prices: Fifa's prices a 'monumental betrayal' says Football Supporters Europe
Fans' group Football Supporters Europe says it is
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 10/12/2025
Gordon does NOT deserve to start ahead of Barnes on the left..! January window, straight swap for the Egyptian 🐀.!
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 02/12/2025
My cricketing idol, Portsmouth net buddy, Bournemouth relationship advisor, and Cowherds ‘swift half’ companion. Sleep well Judgey, RIP. 😢
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 26/11/2025
There’s nothing that says you’re getting old as when you spend more in a week on ibuprofen as you do on alcohol.!
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 25/11/2025
Or as the French say, ‘Newcastle away’!
media.tenor.com
a man and a woman are standing next to each other and the woman is asking the man if he ever had deja vu
ALT: a man and a woman are standing next to each other and the woman is asking the man if he ever had deja vu
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 25/11/2025
I’ve got half a dozen idiots in my Y9 class who have a better grasp of experiential learning than some of our lot..! #nufc
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 25/11/2025
The Metro doesn’t usually sound like this! #nufc
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 09/11/2025
#nufc worth pointing out that Attwell got 2 penalties wrong, and VAR failed to put those wrongs right! 🤔
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ShortEye @shorteye.bsky.social · 09/11/2025
#nufc this is on Howe. Hall should have been on 20 minutes ago! I love BDB, but he was screaming sub me from the end of the 1st half. Fuck me I’m fuming!!!!!
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