Sign in

Shane Almgren

@shanealmgren.substack.com
489 followers 15 following 451 posts

Author, speaker, entrepreneur, musician, comedian, storyteller, endless purveyor of nonsense and practical jokes with a propensity for incarceration. Banned for life from the Nashville zoo.

PostsRepliesMedia
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 14/02/2026
It’s really neat what U.S. Congressmen are having to post on social media in Trump’s America.
000 0
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 08/02/2026
This image from the Epstein files is a draft press release from August 9, 2019 announcing Jeffrey Epstein was found dead in his jail cell. Not particularly noteworthy. Except that Epstein wasn’t found dead until August 10.
000 0
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 04/01/2026
Who remembers this little gem?
010 1
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 29/12/2025
No lies detected here.
000 0
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 08/11/2025
Define IRONY: The man who coined the term "Sleepy Joe" peacefully napping in his office chair...behind the Resolute Desk...in the Oval Office...IN THE MIDDLE OF A FREAKING TELEVISED PRESS CONFERENCE
100 1
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 20/09/2025
I guess we’re just threatening war with everyone now?
000 0
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 20/09/2025
010 1
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 07/09/2025
I guess we’re just pro war crimes now?
000 0
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 06/09/2025
The “President” of the United States of America is on social media threatening to go to war with an American city.
000 0
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 04/09/2025
Who woulda ever in a million years thunk that Speaker Moses Mike was covering for a wealthy donor?!?
000 0
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 04/09/2025
Your president*, ladies and gents: “As previously mentioned, we are giving serious thought to taking away Rosie O’Donnell’s Citizenship. She is not a Great American and is, in my opinion, incapable of being so!”
000 0
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 31/08/2025
For the record, the U.S. has so far taken in about $136 BILLION from tariffs, which I supposed is better than nothing. Who remembers back to 2024 when our Country was completely destroyed and our military power was obliterated thanks to no awesome tariffs? Don't all raise your hands at once.
000 0
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 31/08/2025
Here's what Trump was doing with his Saturday: posting AI pictures of himself on social media. Really, these are precious. You could steal an old lady's purse directly in front of this lard ass and escape his meaty justice by slowly jogging up a small flight of stairs. Judge Dread he is not.
010 1
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 29/08/2025
A sharp-eyed DIY’er has uncovered evidence of what many of us suspected - Trump is a cheap bastard with a fetish for gold spray paint.
000 0
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 21/08/2025
Folks, we are witnessing political satire for the ages! Since MAGA loves to hijack our terms and repurpose them for their own bad-faith arguments, I say we start returning the favor. I hereby declare that MAGA now stands for Make America Gavin Already. MAGA!!!!!!
000 0
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 15/08/2025
Gavin Newsom is the best SNL Trump ever. Prove me wrong.
010 1
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 14/08/2025
010 1
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 14/08/2025
President Newsom continues the epic trolling of Convict Trump
000 0
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 13/08/2025
Trump’s latest polling numbers just came out showing his National Approval rating at 37%. His net approval rating is at -8.6 for August, and has even fallen 9% points among Republican voters since taking office. Trump’s response? “Wow! Highest polling Republican President in HISTORY! Thank you.”
210 2
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 13/08/2025
Newsom has apparently discovered his calling in life.
000 0
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 13/08/2025
Define “narcissist”: Convicted felon Trump fires the head of the Kennedy Center, appoints himself chairman, then shares a post of the Center he’s the self-appointed head of thanking himself for “restoring the grandeur” of the thing that was already perfectly fine before he showed up and ruined it.
000 0
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 12/08/2025
Apparently, Trump is now at the FAFO stage of his presidency.
000 0
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 11/08/2025
“I’ll take ‘Things Nobody Has Been Asking For That Distract From The Epstein Files’ for $600, Alex.” “A Statement from Donald J. Trump, President of the United States of America: Gold will not be Tariffed!”
010 1
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 09/08/2025
Apparently the internet is just now finding out what Trump did to the Oval Office door. Can we maybe get this guy tested for meth?
110 1
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 09/08/2025
It turns out we actually can all agree on a some things.
010 1
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 03/08/2025
The very stable genius is having a midnight meltdown.
000 0
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 02/08/2025
000 0
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 26/07/2025
Sweetheart, you didn't need to tell us who you voted for. All you had to say was you were a "wite Suburian" and we could've figured out the rest.
110 1
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 25/07/2025
020 2
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 25/07/2025
"TO JEFF – YOU ARE THE GREATEST! - Donald" – A heartwarming message in Epstein's copy of Donald Trump’s book “Trump: The Art of the Comeback”
000 0
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 24/07/2025
No commentary needed.
121 2
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 24/07/2025
NEVER FORGET: Donald Trump is president for “all” Americans! 🤣😂😅😂🤣😂🤣 It’s so incredibly baffling why so many people don’t like this guy.
020 2
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 24/07/2025
If you’re curious what Massie did to deserve Trump’s ire, well…um…he co-sponsored a bipartisan bill to require the release of the Epstein files. WHAT A…SLOW MOVING…LOSER!!!
010 1
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 21/07/2025
Yes, convicted felon Donald Trump just posted an AI video of Obama getting arrested.
000 0
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 21/07/2025
This is why reasoning with MAGA is futile. They’re like two brain cells from child sacrifice by fire at this point.
200 2
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 20/07/2025
MORE EPSTEIN DISTRACTION NONSENSE
000 0
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 20/07/2025
GREAT NEWS, EVERYONE!!! America was completely DEAD a year ago, but now it’s the “hottest” and most respected country in the world. All thanks to Trump…who apparently ended a bunch of foreign wars NOBODY EVEN KNEW ABOUT!
100 1
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 20/07/2025
Convicted felon Donald Trump is so desperate to turn America’s attention to literally ANYTHING other than Epstein that they’re actually floating the idea that Russia interfering in the 2016 election was **really** Obama tampering with the election to “subvert the will of the people.” In 2016.
001 1
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 20/07/2025
Elon has a point.
000 0
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 14/07/2025
America 2025 is officially a Jerry Springer episode. Stephen Miller just called a CA judge a “communist” for making a ruling he didn’t like, and Gavin Newsom’s office responded by calling Miller a “fascist cuck” (because Miller’s wife ran off with Elon Musk).
000 0
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 14/07/2025
Things you will find all over Trump’s social media account: Donald Trump with athletes, celebrities, and Glorious Odes To Himself Things you will NOT find: Donald Trump with working-class Americans, victims of tragedy, or anyone else who doesn’t have the $1 million Mar A Lago initiation fee
010 1
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 13/07/2025
Trump just got ratioed for the first time in his Truth* Social history. (If you're not familiar with the term "ratioed," it refers to a social media post that receives more backlash than likes or re-shares.)
130 3
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 13/07/2025
Just filled up my Bingo card!
000 0
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 13/07/2025
Donald Trump’s tiny brain just officially broke.
000 0
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 12/07/2025
30% tariffs on Mexico!
000 0
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 12/07/2025
It will always remain baffling that MAGA simply can’t understand why people call Trump a threat to democracy. He’s now threatening to take away Rosie O’Donnell’s citizenship, an American Born Citizen:
010 1
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 11/07/2025
From the official White House Twitter/X account
000 0
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 10/07/2025
This is why people are still talking about that “creep,” and why convicted felon Trump very much wished they’d stop.
010 1
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 06/07/2025
020 2
Shane Almgren @shanealmgren.substack.com · 06/07/2025
020 2