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Sela: Calamitous

@sela.bsky.social
1.8K followers 937 following 523 posts

we are the new world and we will win happily married to my incredible wife

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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 13/10/2026
There Will Be Blood for Tax Purposes
Daniel Day Lewis as Daniel Plainview in There Will Be Blood, a white man smoking a pipe with a face covered in crude oil looking happily into the sky because he's gonna be so rich
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
realizing i need to add at least one more word to make it stick
tired old yoda, about to die in bed
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
hey hey uh hey uh what do you mean by this
"where gamers of any background, nationality, race, sexuality, or political affiliation are welcome."

"or political affiliation" is highlighted. any political affiliation? ANY political affiliation? ANY POLITICAL AFFIILIATION???
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
Steve Coogan as Alan Partridge with a speech bubble implying he's saying "Sensify by Brembo" in the most British voice possible
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
yeah well i can sing I am the Very Model of a Modern Major General alone in the park but you don't see me bragging about it
Trending

1. Andy Burnham gives lectern-free speech
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
they're calling it the New Triforce
1.2k comments, 1.2k reposts or quotes, 1.2k likes
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
john wick i'm thinking i'm back meme in which john wick is yelling in a chair that he's back
yeah i'm thinking
future me is based
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
oh yeah totally
AI Overview
Fire Emblem: Fortune’s Weave
Survival Game
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
Metroid Ravenous logo featuring Samus munching on an unfortunate alien but instead of title it says "An onion on my belt"
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
a friend pointed out samus' outfit for the new game plus her power hand means she is wearing the trans pride flag colors and: based
Samus Aran, the protagionist of the Metroid series. She is in her Metroid Ravenuous form. She is a tall woman in space armor with a red helmet and green cannon arm. She also has blue shoulders and legs, a white abdomen and arms, and a pink glowing hand (so, the trans pride colors).
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
NOW
that's what i call
A LOT OF PEOPLE I BLOCKED IN THE REPLIES
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 06/09/2026
mond! mond! mond! mond! mond!
Grond but it's Mond. Look I'm not proud here but it's Saturday night and we all gotta entertain ourselves somehow.
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 30/08/2026
Somehow,

Pittcourse returned 

(It’s because armpit + discourse = pittcourse. get it. get it. do you get it now. now do you get it. now do you get it. do you get it. do you get it now.)
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
Immortan Joe from Mad Max Fury Road talking about how you don’t need water, actually!!!!
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
Doctor Doom stands ominously in front of the Avengers Doomsday logo but it says PANTS? OPTIONAL
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
Welcome to Bluesky. Please familiarize yourself with the following accounts to understand the range of opinions it is acceptable to express:
Nine Destiny 2 helmets in 3 rows of 3. The emotions each expressed are inscrutable. What do they think about Discourse? Who could say.
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
they’re talking about green swamp monsters women find atractive and calling it shrekking when this king exists
swamp thing, a giant man-shaped creature made of plants, holding a lamb because he CARES without needing a bunch of free work from his friends to convince him to give a shit unlike fucking SHREK
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 22/08/2026
i'll see your bet and raise you Tom of Gnocchi
A Tom of Finland drawing of sexy leatherman except his head is now a plate of delicious gnocchi
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 21/08/2026
Digital Spy UK: James Bond writer tempted to set next 007 movie in surprise locationToontown from Who Framed Roger Rabbit. It's a chaotic cartoon landscape. The buildings are alave and have eyes. There's a car crash. A cartoon traffic officer is not even trying to deal with it. There's little cartoon guys running around. And the only person who can figure out what SPECTRE's plan here is...Bond. James Bond.
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
no actually i'm pretty sure they're using the glasses as intended
Trending:

1. Teens misuse Meta AI glasses
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 17/08/2026
Sad Winnie the Pooh: 50 state strategy
Happy tuxedo Winnie the Pooh: Fleecing the elderly
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 11/08/2026
btw this is the sprite in question that makes the person asking for the “SFW” mod uncomfy which they attribute to their autism, and not the actual cause, their misogyny
A sprite-based image of a white woman sorceress with long purple hair wearing a top that shows some cleavage and her midriff, the type of outfit you might see someone wearing out and about in the summer, at a club, at the beach, etc. In other words, a normal outfit for normal places.
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 11/08/2026
a transphobe says what?
Warning label that says "Muted by 'A Very British Bigotry'"
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 10/08/2026
Gordon Ramsey saying “delicious, finally some good fucking news”
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 09/08/2026
LOST GRACE DISCOVERED elden ring message except it says ETERNAL LESBIAN VICTORY
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 07/08/2026
Now That’s What I Call Music title card but it says

SO
I tied an onion to my belt which was the style at the
TIME
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 31/07/2026
i saw this posted on reddit and i'm cracking up because it's true, lestat is the nice one of the four of them, the most like a golden retriever himself
loumandaniel user post:

the iwtv diabolicule is louis, armand, and daniel sitting in a room being psychosexually weird with each other while lestat's out in the back garden playing with the dogs. lestat interrupts their discussion on the degradation of self to tell them he taught little buster how to roll over and shake and they all go, "that's great, lestat :)"
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 27/07/2026
Four-panel "boo! get better material!" meme

top left grey bird in front of a microphone speech bubble has screenshot from Tom Holland lip sync with two backup dancers

top right crowd member says "boo! get better material!"

bottom left bird sweats in fear

bottom right bird is looking through cards and they're all tom holland lip sync pictures
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 27/07/2026
Post a perfect album from the 90’s that isn’t Nirvana, Soundgarden, Pearl Jam, or Alice In Chains
Cover of The Breeders album LAST SPLASH
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 21/07/2026
The Jim Downey on Conan meme of "Jeff Epstein, the New York financier" but the text says "hugging face, the jerkwads who scraped all of bluesky without permission?"
020
Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 17/07/2026
one thing that's great about destiny is you can make some absolutely stupid-ass looks
my destiny 2 titan wearing a darth vader crossover helmet and the hallowfire heart exotic which has fire on the inside which is like, darth vader's always burning you know, it's poetry, it rhymes. also my character is wearing white armor with pink undertones or in other words, i made girlboss darth vader. e would've fixed anakin, this is a darth vader who gave up the dark side.
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 16/07/2026
RETVRN
The Rankin-Bass Gollum, a green figure who looks kind of like a human frog, and is objectively similar in design and performance to Serkis' awful screeching coughing "Gollum"
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 15/07/2026
don't worry there's a Plan
Reddit post from user smellyfingernail
18 hours ago
"reminder all they have to do is capture a 10 trillion dollar asteroid to bail me out"
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 08/07/2026
THE BABY HASN’T MANIFESTED, COOP
David Lynch yelling
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 08/07/2026
Anakin upper left: Honestly you picked the best time possible to buy and start actively wearing a Mets cap

Padme upper right: It’s only up from here right

Anakin lower left: …

Padme lower right: It’s only up from here right
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 07/07/2026
TMNT logo but it says "Lifetime Trauma Tummy TROUBLE"
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 15/06/2026
<deep sigh> yeah
Neon Genesis Evangelion Test with results that I'm mainly most similar to Rei although somehow? also evenly split across 3 other characters (Shinji, Misato, and Kaworu)???
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 19/05/2026
tim robinson explaining things from the "coffin flop" sketch from "i think you should leave", he's a white man with arms spread out in a blue button down shirt with an expression of intense concentration as he speaks
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 12/05/2026
gold all-caps elden ring victory text but it says STELLA FOREVER
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 08/05/2026
Fake book cover / poster that shows a white man with a beard looking said at a mirror, his left hand is on the mirror as he looks at himself, with the caption "Did I just argue with a joke? Part of a Bluesky educational series"
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 08/05/2026
Dark Souls "You Died" text that says "Discord Down" because Discord is down
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 07/05/2026
He-Man and the Masters of the Universe logo with Simpsons quote:

BIG TEXT: I tied an onion to my belt
Small text: which was the style at the time
BIG TEXT: Now, to take the ferry cost a nickel
Small text: in those days, nickels had pictures of bumblebees on 'em. "Gimme five bees for a quarter," you'd say. Now where were we? Oh, yeah. The important thing was that I had an onion on my belt, which was the style at the time
020
Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 15/04/2026
“David Lynch’s ghost, what happens when we die?”
LYNCH: [Laughs] [Does not answer]
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 08/04/2026
screenshot of tweet from wint (dril):

"im not owned!  im not owned!!", i continue to insist as i slowly shrink and transform into a corn cob
7:20 PM · Nov 10, 2011
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 30/03/2026
Painting of Vlad the Impaler, the Voivode of Wallachia and an inspiration for Dracula
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 27/03/2026
YouTube thumbnail of Northernlion, a white male bald Canadian streamer who some refer to, because of his appearance, as an egg (not that kind) wearing black headphones looking shocked, placed in front of a screenshot from Road to Empress, a game in which you should NOT accept the soup, showing the protagonist looking shocked shortly before being forced to eat the deadly soup by her evil Aunt who at first appeared to be nice but turned out to be not so nice
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 24/03/2026
Cyberpunk 2077 poster with female V main character with grandpa simpson quote:

So I tied an onion to my belt, which was the style at the time. Now, to take the ferry cost a nickel, and in those days, nickels had pictures of bumblebees on 'em. "Gimme five bees for a quarter," you'd say. Now where were we? Oh, yeah. The important thing was that I had an onion on my belt, which was the style at the time. They didn't have any white onions, because of the war. The only thing you could get was those big yellow ones...
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 23/03/2026
i have an award for Mr. Baker
That's right it's the "Fell for it again award"
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 22/03/2026
mean girls "stop trying to make fetch happen" meme except the white woman in a santa hat is saying "stop trying to make crimson desert happen"
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Sela: Calamitous @sela.bsky.social · 20/03/2026
Dune movie poster using Dune movie font with Grandpa's quote from The Simpsons:

So I tied an onion to my belt, which was the style at the time. Now, to take the ferry cost a nickel, and in those days, nickels had pictures of bumblebees on 'em. "Gimme five bees for a quarter," you'd say. Now where were we? Oh, yeah. The important thing was that I had an onion on my belt, which was the style at the time. They didn't have any white onions, because of the war. The only thing you could get was those big yellow ones...
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