iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 16/05/2026

Zoomers have just now discovered Sneakers O'Toole

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 15/03/2026

My theme song is "Hikari no Pants-Shitter".

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 12/02/2026

Kitten: *takes a drag off a cigarette* "Name's Poopdick. Doctor Raymond Poopdick III. That's what my humans used to call me."

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 31/12/2025

BROADCAST: Yo, if I asked for a ban from your RPG forum recently, it's because you're either bitch-ass gatekeepers or your staff's been staring me down for donations like crackheads. I just wanna let you know, I hope your Tiefling Bard or Deathstalker Fighter get rocks fall'd on.

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 19/12/2025

a Tolkien Orc named Dikgâsh "OI WOT WOT, MY NAME'S DIKGÂSH, SPAWN OF CÚMSLUG."

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 02/11/2025

It's something I notice only among the CharOp crowd, too. Like, no one else freaks out except for them, and they're also the people who tend to ghost out on games the minute they realize they're not going to be able to top the GM from the bottom or push the other players around.

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 02/11/2025

I'm also gonna say this: If you NEED twenty-five books to play your character or they can't function, and seeing someone go, "Well, maybe two books for Players?" on a request for a game that that you don't have to play in sets you off, go count your fuckin' dick, man.

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 02/11/2025

Posted a request on Giant in the Playground, Generic Classes UA v3.5. Guy CRASHES THE FUCK OUT and starts bitching about how "bad" they are. I got his post removed, and internet be internetting, but I don't shriek at people who play WFRPG or PF2E even though I dislike those?

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 28/10/2025

My god, I forgot how GOD DAMN CUTE Thelma Lou from The Andy Griffith Show is, she has the prettiest eyes.

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 10/10/2025

I got my electric trike in the mail and I'm gonna put it together later today. If anyone's engagements break off after tomorrow, it's because your fiancée saw me cruising and couldn't resist me. I will not apologize. I will pull more ass than a brush at a petting zoo. 😼😼😼

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 09/10/2025

Boss: *slams fists on table, externally visible vasovagal response* "I'M THE BOSS OF Gossip HARBOR, WHY DID YOU PUT ADS ON OUR GAME?! IT IS A HEARTFELT, WHOLESOME GAME ABOUT HOW A SINGLE MOTHER FIXES UP A HOUSE! PLAY IT NOW!" Employees: *look at each other* "...huh?" Boss: *fart*

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 09/10/2025

Evony I remember when the advertising for this was at least quasi-honest, and they'd steal Daily Deviations from deviantART, and not use bullet hell gameplay to... What the FUCK are these companies smoking? What's bullet hell gotta do with a Civ clone?

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 09/10/2025

one game that "buys things for stray dogs" Everyone in this ad looks like they've destroyed at least one toilet at my job and then bitched at me to clean the bathroom while I'm heading in to do just that.

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 09/10/2025

"HAVE HER TAKE HER CLOTHS OFF!!!!!" Dude, it's a picture of Kelly Brook, and I can guarantee you you can find A LOT MORE, and better, with just a five-second search.

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 09/10/2025

dating sim thing but where you molest your subordinate after getting her drunk >:|

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 09/10/2025

Gossip Harbor Fucking unhinged ads with some guy screaming about how he's the "BOSS OF GOSSIP HARBOR" and how it's got heartwarming gameplay. Provided a stroke victim didn't write the script... what the FUCK? also the mom is stupid

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 09/10/2025

those GenAI ipcture things "MAEK GIRL OF YOUR DREAMS" and it's a pirate chick Just use ChatGPT, man, you can get deergirl pirates.

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 09/10/2025

Wizardry Variants Daphne My phone crashed. I love Wizardry, too. ;___;

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 09/10/2025

those horny GenAI chat things I like how everyone either looks like a Bratz doll or some weird combination of K-Pop idols and gangster anime fuckboys.

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 09/10/2025

Rocket Money Who CALLS services to cancel subscriptions, just click buttons. Ads are targetted at Zoomers, and based on two-thirds of every conversation I've had with them, they don't like talking on the phone to begin with and so would naturally know how to cancel with buttons.

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 09/10/2025

RAID: Shadow Legends Umm, so, it started out with interviews with mobs or whatever, and then it'd segue into the orc woman with huge boobs, and now we're getting guides on the "META BUILDZ!!!!!" for people that want to play games but not learn anything other than one-buttons.

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 09/10/2025

DUMB MOBILE ADS I SEE, A COLLECTION

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 08/10/2025

I think Eegah! was an alright movie.

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 28/09/2025

If your sole source of news is podcasts, just shut the fuck up. My uncle watches those motherfuckers and the only thing he's capable of doing outside of working is crashing out because someone who ALSO Didn't Do The Research shrieked about their hunches in front of a boom mic.

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 20/09/2025

Mobile Game Ad: *snorts cocaine* HI, I'M THE BOSS OF GOSSIP HARBOR.

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 14/09/2025

You look so cool, Gonzo! I wanna smoke and drink and listen to jazz music just like you!

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 14/09/2025

Ooh, neat, thank you! I've gotta tell my sister.

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 11/09/2025

The only appropriate response to Minsc when he's on his shit.

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 11/09/2025

*to a naval authority* "I have my letter from Mark, right here." *gets arrested*

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 11/09/2025

inspired by stupid mobile game ads

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 07/09/2025

Don't Look in the Basement is the most misleading horror movie ever, when Sam looked in the basement there wasn't a single LoL streamer or Magic player in sight.

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Reposted by SCARY WIZARD

Jason @envinyon.bsky.social · 01/09/2025

very direct evidence that video game piracy is important in the preservation of video games

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 01/09/2025

If I was on Hey Arnold!, I would have solved Stoop Kid's problems but pushing him off his stoop and peeing all over it so he couldn't sit on it again because it had pee on it.

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 01/09/2025

*unzips pants* I know what will.

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 30/08/2025

*kicks down the door* HI, I'M ERNEST BORGNINE, AND I GOT YOUR WIFE PRRREGNANT!

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 26/08/2025

*watching a movie with Jany Clair in it* I'd better not feel anything funny! *feels everything funny* look she has really pretty eyes

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 23/08/2025

*goes Through the Portal of Time to England in the 1940s* *holds an MP3 player with a compilation of Jeff Boomhauer dialogue up to J.R.R. Tolkien's ears* TREMBLE, MORTAL, AND DESPAIR! FOR THIS IS THE ULTIMATE BASTARDIZATION OF YOUR BELOVED LANGUAGE!

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 22/08/2025

I don't know why no one hasn't beat that purple barefoot elf lady in WoW with socks full of soap and razorblades yet. Fuck's Liadrin praying for when she could just like... fill a sock with soap and razorblades and go "lol improv flail".

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SCARY WIZARD @scarywizard89.bsky.social · 17/08/2025

if they put Alias in new Forgotten Realms books, they could just say "she's baby" and people would like her and maybe stop fawning over that droning-assed vampire and Random Cheese Monkey hamster-clutcher

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