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The Despicable Lizard

@rosecouverte.bsky.social
12 followers 15 following 53 posts

She/Her. FFXIV alt of @tange9t.bsky.social. Main on Crystal, alts several expansions behind on Light and Primal. Au Ra face 4 enjoyer. I don't gpose and the only RPing I'm interested in doing is in the form of intense character building on a forum.

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The Despicable Lizard @rosecouverte.bsky.social · 07/07/2026
Healer: WHM>SGE>AST>SCH Tank: WAR>PLD>DRK>GNB Melee: MNK>NIN>VPR>SAM>RPR>DRG Ranged: MCH>DNC>BRD Caster: SMN>BLOM>PCT>RDM Favourites of all time for each role would be like, current WHM, StB DRK, HW DRG, ShB DNC and start of this expac BLOM
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The Despicable Lizard @rosecouverte.bsky.social · 11/06/2026
i got very annoyed about how long it's been since we've done anything in the black shroud on account of "I started there 13 years ago" and crunched some numbers, it's fucking dire
bass the instrument pervert — 9:41 PM
alright i ran the math
it's very upsetting no matter how you slice it
counting just like, main content, it has been 24 major patches since we had anything in the black shroud at all, the last thing having in fact been baelsar's wall
if you want to really stretch and count like, sylphstep, you can bring that down to 16 major patches between 3.5 and 6.3
at an EXTREME stretch you could count the rivenroad section in UCoB and say it's "only" 14 between 4.11 and 6.3
bass the instrument pervert — 9:49 PM
if we work off the just main content numbers, the longest stretch thanalan has had is 12 between the gold saucer (2.51) and the masked carnivale/hidden gorge 1-2 punch (4.5), which comes down to 8 if you're working off of the "being generous about ultimates" numbers since both UCoB and UWU hit Thanalan and is much lower if you consider every new feature they stick in the saucer, while limsa's biggest drought in terms of only main content is a tied 9 between sirensong (4.0) and castrum marinum (5.4) or island sanctuary (6.2) and present day (probably increasing in 8.0), both of which come massively down if you're being generous to only 5 apiece between UWU (4.31) and Ocean Fishing/Falling City of Nym (5.2) or the last Island Sanctuary update (6.5) and the new fucking air force one map they added in the cieldalaes??? (7.4)
but what's REALLY upsetting
is that the main content gap currently ongoing in the black shroud
is longer than the gap between world of darkness and troia, which was 22 major patches
(2 skull emoji reactions)
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The Despicable Lizard @rosecouverte.bsky.social · 04/06/2026
it's always really funny to me to hear people talk about the game being unplayable if your ping goes a tick over 100, I used to be stuck on 180-200 in NA (it's abt 150 now) and even if I go to EU now it's still about 110 because the servers are so far lmao, I wish I could know your experience
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The Despicable Lizard @rosecouverte.bsky.social · 27/05/2026
excited for evercold for when we fight ramiel and it's just ozma 3.0
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The Despicable Lizard @rosecouverte.bsky.social · 25/05/2026
Wrote a chapter of an ff14 fanfic, first time doing anything longform like this or fanfiction in general in about 20 years o please be gentle archiveofourown.org/works/854815...
archiveofourown.org
Variations Upon Exodus - Chapter 1 - LrnLcrtn - Final Fantasy XIV [Archive of Our Own]
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
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The Despicable Lizard @rosecouverte.bsky.social · 13/09/2025
it's gonna be crazy not raiding next tier, last one i fully missed was back in stormblood
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The Despicable Lizard @rosecouverte.bsky.social · 21/08/2025
Listen I don't want to kick people while they're down even if I'm personally upset about it but like, y'all clogged a zone for weeks and wouldn't shut the fuck up about it publicly, IDK what anyone thought was going to happen other than "they go after the thing that enables this in the first place"
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The Despicable Lizard @rosecouverte.bsky.social · 21/08/2025
Controversial take but I hope the Monster Hunter trial is actually designed like FF14 content this time so i can like, actually play it on my ping and also ideally not have the same problem as rathalos of "WHM (my main) is a completely non-functional class when the only heals that work are shields"
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The Witful Thinker @tange9t.bsky.social · 17/05/2025
nah mate that's alright
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The Despicable Lizard @rosecouverte.bsky.social · 07/04/2025
damn this tier got hands lauren that was just the first fight
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The Despicable Lizard @rosecouverte.bsky.social · 10/02/2025
better late than never to end the tier
the raid group lined up in our monowheels from biggest to smallest
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The Despicable Lizard @rosecouverte.bsky.social · 18/01/2025
gnot my goofy ass staying up several hours extra for raid on the day it was well established ahead of time that we would be missing 5 people lmao
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The Despicable Lizard @rosecouverte.bsky.social · 13/01/2025
weezer going thru ARR be like "oo-wee-oo we are running halatali"
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The Despicable Lizard @rosecouverte.bsky.social · 08/01/2025
hey congrats on clearing In From the Cold (it was harder in 6.0) idr the rest of the copypasta genuinely though having only done it pre-nerf it was a really cool experience
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The Despicable Lizard @rosecouverte.bsky.social · 11/12/2024
return to cobbers imminent probably
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The Despicable Lizard @rosecouverte.bsky.social · 11/12/2024
im like jon taffer except instead of having inarticulate rage at people running disgusting bars in need of rescue mine is directed at the youtubers who have been posting the exact same "the problem with healing in ffxiv" shit every month or so for the past 5 years
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Maya 💎 @mayannaiseyay.bsky.social · 09/12/2024
Just WATCHING my wife go through FRU prog made me delve into madness long enough to make this
Pokemon edit, where professor oak is talking to a seel and saying "A feeble Seel pro-tects nothing."
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The Despicable Lizard @rosecouverte.bsky.social · 08/12/2024
god i remembered the ala mhigan side of stormblood being way worse than the othardian side but id blocked out just how much of it is sitting around a table opposite raubahn in an unvoiced scene being told either what you're doing next or all the things that happened off-screen
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The Despicable Lizard @rosecouverte.bsky.social · 04/12/2024
me when they get me
Krile from FFXIV looking sad (they got her)
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The Despicable Lizard @rosecouverte.bsky.social · 04/12/2024
i wish it was easier to like, use c+ to make your wol fat without giving them the hugest ass known to man in the process. obv some bodies have extra sliders for that kind of stuff but like, that doesn't help when u don't have upscales and get so frustrated trying to diy in blender that u explode
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The Despicable Lizard @rosecouverte.bsky.social · 04/12/2024
the outrageous oronir and deplorable dotharl have once again decided to increase my miseries exponentially with yet another calamitous contest while i am trying to sleep, as is their wont. typical
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The Despicable Lizard @rosecouverte.bsky.social · 03/12/2024
yall ever run the fastest leveling roulette of your life bc i was not expecting to instapop gubal for a 10:37 run
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The Despicable Lizard @rosecouverte.bsky.social · 03/12/2024
running the 97 dungeon on black mage and something just clicked in my brain about a quarter of the way through the second boss. i think i get it now. i unlocked 1% of the black mage freak brain
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The Despicable Lizard @rosecouverte.bsky.social · 03/12/2024
fuck i just realised way too late i could've made a joke about the red dot in that one clear screenshot being the secret final phase, skogs FRU
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The Despicable Lizard @rosecouverte.bsky.social · 02/12/2024
i know when they do beastmaster in ff14 there's a fairly high chance they just do the expected thing and give it a whip but i cant lie i really want them to follow through on what was already established with lyon and pagaga and make it a maiming/striking class with an axe and a shield
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Siwon | read ICCUIGTL!!! @siwonwrites.bsky.social · 02/12/2024
m4s defeated!
my static's clear screenshot of m4s. we are all posing in front of the treasure chest. i am doing /showleft to show off my friends.
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rory (moved) @mooncattes.bsky.social · 02/12/2024
m4s down! 🎉
clear screenshot from m4s in front of the treasure chest
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The Despicable Lizard @rosecouverte.bsky.social · 02/12/2024
we killed despite so much scheduling prog caused by such things as "i moved house this tier"
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The Despicable Lizard @rosecouverte.bsky.social · 29/11/2024
sometimes executive dysfunction means you level your EU alt when you should be capping tomes on main instead to finally get your hat and pants several months too late
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The Despicable Lizard @rosecouverte.bsky.social · 29/11/2024
TYPO IN THE LAUNCHER GET THEIR ASS #ffxiv
Text reads "28/11/2024 [Recovery] [Dynamis] Recovery from Kralen World Technical Difficulties (Nov. 28, 29). Kralen is a typo, as the world in question is actually named Kraken.
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The Despicable Lizard @rosecouverte.bsky.social · 23/11/2024
0 clue how much im gonna use this account but it is here
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