Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 17/07/2025So, have they stopped eating the dogs and eating the cats? I’m curious if all this ICE action has resulted in a cat and dog population boom. 1211
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 15/07/2025Doctor: Your blood pressure is a little high. Me: I have 4 kids. Doctor: Your blood pressure is a little low. 1415
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 28/06/2025Jeff Bezos’s wedding cost $50 million. In related news I wash plastic forks so I can reuse them. 5419
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 15/06/2025Me [whispering]: It's my wife's birthday so I was wondering if the staff could sing Happy Birthday to her? McDonald's Cashier: 1130
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 13/06/2025Daughter is texting me to complain about how hot her classroom is so it's a good thing I can control the high school's air conditioning from my iPhone. 0180
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 11/06/2025Wanna feel old? One year ago, Jon Bon Jovi was on the cover of AARP Magazine. 1211
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 06/06/2025Trump and Elon divorce stuck on who gets legal custody of this photo. 0152
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 05/06/2025I feel like I’ve stumbled upon Duolingo After Dark. 0130
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 31/05/2025My son starts his first full-time job on Monday and I’m not looking forward to watching the light go out in his eyes. 1314
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 30/05/2025I’ve reached that age where birds get mad at me for waking them up. 0110
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 29/05/2025Just when you think all the Trump taco talk ended with the Stormy Daniels situation. 050
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 29/05/2025Me: These are getting a bit snug, can you take the waist out a few inches? Tailor: These are sweatpants. 0173
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 28/05/2025Quite possibly the greatest playlist title of all time. 091
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 27/05/2025Me: [trying to fall sleep] My Apple Watch: Would you like to log this workout? 0121
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 26/05/2025My wife’s desire to sleep in on weekends and my seasonal allergies are in a constant battle with each other. 1130
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 25/05/2025AI but for my television so it knows to mute or change the channel whenever Trump appears on screen. 1304
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 24/05/2025Ate a lot of vegetables last week to make room in the drawer for this weekend's beer. 0160
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 23/05/2025Son's College: Consider giving a gift to the Alumni Association! Me: [sends them back his $34,000 tuition bill with a bow on it] 1111
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 20/05/2025Not sure Home Depot thought through the tagline of their app. 2151
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 13/05/2025Me: Finally we can enjoy some nice weather. Seasonal allergies: hey wassup 0285
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 12/05/2025Me: I don’t think I could hate watching the news more. The news: 0120
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 11/05/2025Laptop: Change your password Me: [changes password] Laptop: Your password is too short Me: [changes] Laptop: Your password is too long Me: [changes] Laptop: Your password needs a number Me: [changes] Laptop: Your password must be uncrackable by the Enigma Machine Me: [quits job] 0150
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 11/05/2025Don’t forget to continually remind your children not to piss mom off today. 0296
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 09/05/2025I didn’t plan on eating at midnight, but the wife and I didn’t start discussing what to do for dinner until 5 PM. 1152
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 09/05/2025First American-born Pope debuts BBQ, Salt and Vinegar, and Flaming Hot flavors of Eucharist. 2202
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 08/05/2025News: Massachusetts Attorney General is suing CVS. The complaint is outlined on only a single page, but it’s 6 miles long and has some coupons at the very end. 0153
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 08/05/2025Me: Wow, honey. Great job on dinner. Wife: You like it? Me: Yeah it actually tastes good. Wife: Me: Gooder. Wife. Me: Gooder than its usual goodness. Wife: Me: I’ll sleep on the couch tonight. 0130
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 07/05/2025If I was a cardinal at the Vatican, I’d be the one always writing in Bart Simpson as a write-in candidate on the Pope ballot. 4244
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 06/05/2025My favorite thing about jet lag is falling asleep during dinner and waking up in time to catch The Late Show. 0122
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 05/05/2025Life is all about balance, which is why after a week in Greece eating the freshest vegetables, tastiest dishes, and most flavorful foods, our first stop for dinner after landing in the US was at a Popeyes Chicken. 0130
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 24/04/2025Me: What is the opposite of Right Whale Day? Is it Wrong Whale Day or Left Whale Day? Wife: Do you ever shut off? 1171
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 23/04/2025JD Vance shown holding the original 15 Commandments. 072
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 23/04/2025News: Food dyes to be removed from US food supply. Related: Skittles, Froot Loops and Fruity Pebbles are now official sponsors of the “50 Shades of Grey” series. 1142
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 23/04/2025Me [packing for Greece]: How many Tupperware containers should I pack for bringing home feta cheese? Wife: I’m going alone. 0141
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 22/04/2025Maybe Melania should turn her anti-bullying campaign's focus towards what her husband is doing to Powell. 0142
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 22/04/2025Now I’m at the Greek lesson where we talk about bartenders. 1132
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 21/04/202598% of the week leading up to vacation is spent looking at pictures of other people there right now to see what they’re wearing so I know how to pack. 0130
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 20/04/2025It is so windy this Easter that if Jesus had risen today, he would’ve landed three towns over. 0120
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 20/04/2025I'm sure 4 kids fighting about who found the most eggs at 7 AM is exactly what Jesus had planned for today. 1201
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 19/04/2025Child: What’s Greek Easter? Me: It’s when the Easter Bunny hides baklava all over the house. Child: Me: Child: I’ll ask mom. 0171
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 18/04/2025I legit thought that was Walton Goggins on the right. 160
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 17/04/2025With prices the way they are, we have decided to forgo the traditional Easter egg hunt, and will now be hunting for something slightly less expensive: gold bars. 191
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 17/04/2025Wife: What should I crochet next? Me: Oooh make one of the dragons from Game of Thrones. Wife: 3190
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 16/04/2025Hostess: Party of two? Me: Yes, but we need a table for six. Hostess: Oh, expecting more people? Me: No, I’m ordering fajitas tonight. 1120
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 16/04/2025Now I’m on The Handmaid’s Tale episode where the Commander repeatedly institutes and then scales back tariffs to manipulate the stock market. 1203
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 13/04/2025Child: What's that? Me: My high school senior photo. Child: Wow. You were pretty good looking. Me: Thanks. Child: Me: Child: What happened? 1140
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 11/04/2025Now I’m at the Greek lesson where we discuss how I handle stress. 0151
Rodney Lacroix @rodlacroix.bsky.social · 11/04/2025If there was an Executive Order to outlaw waking up before the alarm I would have been deported by now. 2171