iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Most of my memories of her aren't positive, she's alive yet I've grieved her like she's already dead, she is not the mom I need and she will never be. I wish I could forget everything and go back to being a child sleeping on the couch with her but I can't and I miss her and am so angry at her

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I miss my mommy I wish I wasn't uncomfortable around her and I wish I never knew what my mom thought of me I wish she could just apologize for everything she's done and acknowledge that it happened I wish she would stop drinking and I wish she never got cancer

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For me to think that of them

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I know at the end of the day my friends don't miss me or think of me as much as I do of them and that's okay and it's also probably really unfair

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They've said before that if anything were to happen to me or our other friend they wouldn't know what to do but I think that they only mean our other friend and they just added me in to make me not feel left out or they don't mean it as much which is horrible to think about her

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I don't know why but I feel like my ability to interact with people like disappeared, I suddenly like become an awkward dog around people I'm close with or want to be close with like wow I have nothing to contribute ever to anything

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Listen to the Strokes guys

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Sometimes I think I have no personaliy

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Watching a new show recently and it's negatively affecting my school life because I'm too busy watching it

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Fuck it we ball I've been to two parties and I've been twerked on in BOTH and each time I have NO IDEA WHAT TO DO

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Update: watched it some time ago, it's actually worse.

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Again partly my fault, I haven't always been the greatest friend and I can admit that, but I think I changed a lot and put a lot of effort into being a better person for my friends and loved ones and I don't think anyone would do the same thing for me ultimately it's okay tho I love them

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I do kind of wish I was someone's person though idk even my closest bestest friend has someone they would rank higher than me in a friendship chart and I know that it's not good to quantify relationships but idk

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I am okay btw if anyone reads this, I was just thinking about it and wanted to put them down somewhere

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I feel like if you asked any of my friends who their best friend is I wouldn't even be on the top 5 for a lot of them and if they had multiple best friends I wouldnt be one of them, which I think is ironic cause I consider all of my relatively close friends my bsfs which like damn ur pathetic

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I think I make it easy, I'm not unpleasant I don't think but I don't feel like I really have something holding together my friends and I and if I didn't reach out I'd never be talked to, which is partly my fault but i just get a little sad thinking about it sometimes

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Sometimes I feel like I have no significance in people's life and that if I didn't reach out to people no one would care or notice and I don't think Ive ever really been anyone's best friend in recent years, not necessarily a bad thing per se im not all that torn up about it I'm used to the thought

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It feels like I'm finding products authentically I love it

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I don't care that it's all advertisements I'm eating these up on my goooddd

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I RIDNT KNOW ULTA SENT OUT A MAGAZINE??? IM SO HAPPY OH YM GAOOAOAOABAHAGAH I LOVEAHAZINES

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I have pretty dry skin all over my face and I use grippy primers usually so when my makeup separated on my nose I just assumed it was just like the consequences of existing outside but no turns out it's The Oil

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GONZO the Ca'at @gonzo.bsky.social · 30/05/2026

I know no one cares and this is kind of a known thing but my nose is oily and would be the first part of my makeup to separate so I used Milanis blurring primer just for my T zone and my makeup is ON! How I didn't clock that a matte primer would be better for an oily part of my face I don't know

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Reposted by M

Behaviores Report; 100% goode!

Orange and white cat, much too close to the camera. His behavior report is 100% good.

33105965 1.1K

M @roacher1.bsky.social · 27/05/2026

RIP Henry Clerval, you would've loved ragebaiting

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I need someone I can go see horror movies with

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Food is here! Very happy

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Shout-out to my Grandpa for passing down the only Indian trait that I have! (hyperpigmentation!) Bc this girl is white and pasty let me tell you

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Like I'm being so fr she's juicy idk if I'm just not using a lot but she's persistent in my life

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In my experience its been fine however I've heard that other concealers are better and so I'm like looking for concealers to replace it once it's finished which probably won't be for a long time bc I've been using this one concealer since like junior year in hs

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So when I do my makeup I do a total of three layers one color correcting bc I have hyperpigmentation LOL then one like base concealer thats a similar shade to my skin tint then the palest whitest concealer I have which is ELFs camo concealer in fair rose but I heard that that concealer is lowk butt

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Also Chitan liked this I'm on top of the world

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M @roacher1.bsky.social · 23/05/2026

Sister too busy playing deadlock to finish her order of food #mysisterhatesmeandwantsmetodieofstarvation

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I don't know why she had a fan that worked perfectly well?

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M @roacher1.bsky.social · 23/05/2026

My mom just fucking stole my fan from my room???

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M @roacher1.bsky.social · 23/05/2026

My sweet beloved roommate whom I miss very much taught me the joys of having music playing 25/8 so now it's all that's happening in my room

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My sister said she wouldn't get me a joint 😔😔 she hates me (this is a joke this is a joke this is a joke for legal reasons this is a joke)

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Update: Don got her pregnant and she had twins, they got into a relationship however he's kind of a bum

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She's a secret agent btw

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I'm doing a Lepacy thing and I'm on the first generation and my sims name is Deirdre and she's beautiful but she's been alive for a total of a week and she's already hooked up with Nancy once, has a current hook up situation with Johnny and is in the development of a situationshop with Don

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I love playing the sims (sucks it's owned by EA I can't wait for paralives) and it's so eventful so far

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RIP Henry Clerval, you would've loved Psychology

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Reading Frankenstein and Robert Walton gay as hell

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