iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him) @rjbayley.bsky.social · 03/10/2026

'Could this've been a text?' is my 'could this've been an email?'

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RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him) @rjbayley.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

Did You Know?: When someone says they are 'standing in their power' it means they've blocked the toilet.

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RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him) @rjbayley.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

Well done to Czechia for having a more dreary national anthem than England

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RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him) @rjbayley.bsky.social · 24/09/2026

Please do not approach any man when he is in open flatch.

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RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him) @rjbayley.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

When you've done as many specials as I have, the themes start getting a bit weird. September's Metal Empire Monthly Special only contains songs with air raid sirens in them. You can listen to the broadcast recording HERE: www.mixcloud.com/rjbayley/mon... #Metal #HeavyMetal #HardRock

A grid layout featuring a central promotional graphic for the radio show "RJ Bayley's Metal Empire," surrounded by a collage of various heavy metal and hard rock album covers and band artwork.
Center Graphic: A portrait of RJ wearing top hat, sunglasses, and skull face paint behind a broadcast microphone, next to a illuminated red "ON AIR" sign. Text above reads "RJ BAYLEY'S METAL EMPIRE" alongside broadcast times: "WEDNESDAYS 8 AM ET / 5 AM PT / 1 PM UK / 14 CET". Overlaid at the bottom in bold red and white lettering is the show title: "THE MONTHLY SPECIAL: AIR RAID WARNING," with the subtitle "AN AIR RAID SIREN IN EVERY SONG (I TOLD YOU LAST WEEK IT WAS GOING TO BE A WEIRD ONE)".
Surrounding Images: A grid of heavy metal album covers and media assets, including: LP/Single artwork from bands such as Starkill (Walk Through Fire), Mustasch (Parasite!), Girlschool, Not Enough Space (Devil Left Me On Read), and Arch Enemy. Band logos, dark thematic art & a Mixcloud interface screenshot listing recent episodes.

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RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him) @rjbayley.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

I went to Germany last month and I've already booked my holiday there for next year. I love Germany. G E R M A N Y.

static.klipy.com

Crazy German with Flag Car

ALT: Crazy German with Flag Car

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RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him) @rjbayley.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

Delighted that first audiodrama for #TTCombat came out. A vampiric horror set in the world of #Carnevale. Written, produced & sound designed by me. I also play Radu alongside some great voicework by TTCombat staff. Good audience feedback so far! Another is coming very soon! youtu.be/Q-dez2HYSw4?...

youtu.be

Carnevale: Radu Basarab Audio drama

YouTube video by TTCombat

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RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him) @rjbayley.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

From now on I'm going to call every historical wargame that involves swords 'very low fantasy'.

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RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him) @rjbayley.bsky.social · 19/09/2026

Thoughts and prayers for all the news anchors who have been pronouncing his name like 'Mack L'amour'.

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RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him) @rjbayley.bsky.social · 10/09/2026

• 1756: Salzburg, January 27th, Wolfgang Amadeus is born. • 1761: At the age of five Amadeus begins composing. • 1773: He writes his first piano concerto. • 1782: Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart marries Constanze Weber.

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RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him) @rjbayley.bsky.social · 08/09/2026

Suggested new Bond film titles: Glamourpig Ghost Of A Whiff Silverstank Forever A Perve ClusterFace He Who Smelt It To Chuff A Poison Bowelfail A Lovely Lie Down Never Sniff A Wet One Moisthand Last Scab To Pick Porcelainbreaker Deathponce A Shirty Lady CrapSword In A Velvet Guff Always Flush Twice

static.klipy.com

James Bond Gun Barrel Sequence

ALT: James Bond Gun Barrel Sequence

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RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him) @rjbayley.bsky.social · 06/09/2026

Still very upset about the end of my very realistic dream about being cast as the new James Bond and being best friends with Clive Myrie.

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RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him) @rjbayley.bsky.social · 04/09/2026

If I get pulled over by the police for speeding I will also cry 'entrapment'.

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RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him) @rjbayley.bsky.social · 01/09/2026

So kind of you to say, thank you! I'm lucky to narrate a lot of brilliantly written audiobooks.

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Reposted by RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him)

Tru Skies @trudieskies.readindiefantasy.com · 01/09/2026

After a few years of hard work, The Chosen One Con is out now on ebook with paperbacks to follow soon! Available on Kindle, Kobo, Itch and more to come. books2read.com/thechosenone... But of course, I couldn't publish this book without help, and I have a lot of people to thank! 👇

A promo image for The Chosen One Con, out now on Kindle, Kobo, and Itch. It shows the book cover to the Chosen One Con (a young white man in a trench coat holding a glowing blue potion bottle as though trying to steal it) and the following text: Magic spoke to me, whispering promises of fortune and fame. It spoke when I switched on the old MV and the screen came alive with the blue glow of magic, the faint spark and pop of aether flowing through the cables.

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RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him) @rjbayley.bsky.social · 31/08/2026

Thank you so much! I'm lucky to have narrated a lot of fantastic books 🙏

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RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him) @rjbayley.bsky.social · 28/08/2026

Stop thinking of no-longer-supported wargames as 'dead games', start thinking of them as 'completed games'. Play it, get people into it and never worry about the rules changing on you.

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RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him) @rjbayley.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

You think 'Writing's On The Wall' by Sam Smith was a poor song for Spectre until you find out they almost went with Daniel O'Donnell's 'What If James Bond Had To Fight A Ghost?'

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RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him) @rjbayley.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

I'll tell you what, Grim Reaper, you're really turning the metalheads against you at the moment.

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RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him) @rjbayley.bsky.social · 24/08/2026

Rest assured, I will have your back - if you get caught I will use some of the reward money to donate to that fund.

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RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him) @rjbayley.bsky.social · 20/08/2026

It was such a pleasure to narrate and produce @timhardieauthor.bsky.social's fantastic fantasy adventures!

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Reposted by RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him)

Tim Hardie @timhardieauthor.bsky.social · 11/08/2026

If you want to buy the audiobooks of Hall of Bones and A Roll of the Dice direct at a discount, ensuring I get the full list price, you need to head over to AE Audio Outlet before the 13 August. Narrated by the awesome @rjbayley.bsky.social 🔥⚔️🛡️ shop.audiobookempire.com

Experience the Brotherhood of the Eagle on Audio!
Hall of Bones & A Roll of the Dice by Tim Hardie
Narrated by RJ Bayley
Discounted audiobooks now available directly from Audiobook Empire
LAST CHANCE!

“Don’t get me started on the incredible talents of Mr RJ Bayley, whose narrative breadth of character work is astounding.” – Hall of Bones

“in audio form each story is only around 15 minutes and, in that short time, Hardie crafts tales of a fascinating world populated by in depth, well-rounded characters. It just draws you in and spits you back out wanting more.” – A Roll of the Dice

“RJ Bayley … brings exactly the right level of gruff whilst still delivering a great range of nuance for the broad cast of characters.” – Hall of Bones

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RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him) @rjbayley.bsky.social · 10/08/2026

How satisfying it is to get someone to take their bag off the unused seat next to them on a train so you can sit on it.

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RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him) @rjbayley.bsky.social · 03/08/2026

"Crap, we need to distract from Tice, he's in trouble with the Parliamentary Commissioner for Standards, wheel out Farage." "But he's also in trouble with the Parliamentary Commissioner for Standards!" "Make him threaten to use military force against migrants?!?"

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RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him) @rjbayley.bsky.social · 03/08/2026

You can actually see the desperation dripping off Nigel Farage. An increasingly nervy press conference announcing hypothetical military "Operation: Fortress" all because he's fighting a bin.

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RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him) @rjbayley.bsky.social · 29/07/2026

The next James Bond villain should be a cannibal and Sir Ian McKellen.

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RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him) @rjbayley.bsky.social · 28/07/2026

I'm glad the XTC song Making Plans For Nigel is trending. It's a solid song with good social commentary. youtu.be/n-X3Wy-svIY?...

youtu.be

XTC - Making Plans For Nigel

YouTube video by XTCVEVO

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Reposted by RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him)

Tim Hardie @timhardieauthor.bsky.social · 24/07/2026

It was fantastic to work with you as well, which sounds sarcastic now I've written that, but that's not my intention at all! 😆 I really hope we'll be able to complete the series some day... 🙏

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RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him) @rjbayley.bsky.social · 24/07/2026

This is a fantastic opportunity to get two fantastic audiobooks at a fantastic price. Tim has worked magic with these characters, these stories and this world and it was my honour to narrate them for him and you.

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RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him) @rjbayley.bsky.social · 19/07/2026

FFS not one of these commentators have referred to Medina as funky and cold. #worldcup

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RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him) @rjbayley.bsky.social · 19/07/2026

I always like it when a player doesn't notice they're being taken off for a substitution so they have to send the trained rat on. #worldcup

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RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him) @rjbayley.bsky.social · 09/07/2026

I know they don't normally do this for by-elections but never have I wanted a televised debate more in my life. #CountBinface #Clacton

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RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him) @rjbayley.bsky.social · 04/07/2026

If Peter Sutcliffe was still alive and you saw his car would you jack the Ripper?

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Reposted by RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him)

Masterpiece of Turkey Cleverness @turkeycleverness.bsky.social · 03/07/2026

I still don't dare reach up for the airplane lights...

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Reposted by RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him)

OmandOriginal @omandoriginal.bsky.social · 25/06/2026

My brain is now repeating 'arsemergency' to the tune of the Countdown clock. Thanks.

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RJ Bayley, Voice Actor & Writer (he/him) @rjbayley.bsky.social · 25/06/2026

In England, instead of saying 'can't stop the bum rush', we say 'unable to prevent the arse hurry'. For short we might call this an 'arsemergency'.

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