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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon

@raccoon.pizza
717 followers 159 following 8.2K posts

/ˈɛz.mi/ (She/Fae) Slightly radioactive nerd girl with the proportional size and junk food eating abilities of a raccoon. My art: #iDrewThis My Star Trek fan comic: RideByNight.com Avatar by the inimitable @monsterologist.bsky.social

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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 14h
some episodes are more difficult to watch than others. some are literally impossible. i haven't even turned the dvd player on yet and i'm already crying over this one.
title card for DS9 6x26 "Tears of the Prophets"

spoiler alert: it's the episode where Dukat murders Jadzia.
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 20/10/2026
Okay, let's do this. I'm going to be approaching this from a place of "in a society where full medical and surgical transition takes one day, and you're fully recovered the next day, and can fully reverse it the next day, it makes sense that anyone can just do it on request for any reason."
Title card for DS9 6x23 "Profit and Lace."
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 18/10/2026
just got done making it
a grilly cheese sammich
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 17/10/2026
i ran out of space for my books again so i built some shelves
photograph of a piece of my living room. behind the couch, against the wall, is a console table. on top of the table are 4 bookshelf trees, each with 4 shelves.

tree 1 is filled with knock-off choose your own adventre books (books in that style, but without the CYOA branding). trees 2 and 3 have 20th century name-brand CYOAs. tree 4 has 21st century CYOAs.
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 16/10/2026
"And what could be better than putting on some DS9 to watch while i eat my pizza? Which dvd am i up to?" ... "... oh."
photo of a tv screen showing the episode selection menu of a deep space nine DVD. the available options are: 

The Reckoning (pretty good episode)
Valiant (pretty good episode) 
Profit and Lace (worst episode in the franchise. yes, even worse than spock's brain. but i'm determined to try to see it with new eyes) 
Time's Orphan (not a good episode)
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 16/10/2026
// Food It's been 50 days since surgery and probably 52 days since the last time i ate pizza, but i think i'm ready again... Wish me luck!
photograph of a personal-sized pizza and some cheese bread. they come from pier 49 pizza, which is one of my favorites
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 15/10/2026
Dathon holds his arm out in front of JL Picard and says "Ocean friend, when he tore my arm off." From TNG ep Darmok.
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 13/10/2026
thanks for making me worry about my friend for no good reason, bluskis 🙄
screenshot of Ana's skeet, only the bluesky moderators have labeled it as self harm and hidden it
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 11/10/2026
Quote with your moon art. Which reminds me: it's probably about time to start thinking about what i want to draw for my solstice cards this year.
A picture i drew to use on my winter solstice cards in 2022. It's a picture of me sitting on a rooftop in downtown Salt Lake City, drinking some hot cocoa. I'm wearing an emerald green sweater and black leather vest, plus blue jeans and black leather knee-high boots. My hair is ginger red, fading to purple in this one.

It's night time in the winter. A waxing crescent moon is rising over the Wasatch mountains and snow is gently falling. There's a paper bag full of tacos next to me, and a nearby raccoon is rolling a stealth check in the hopes of stealing them from me.A black and white mini comic page, drawn by a human woman. It's also my winter solstice card from 2025.

Panel 1: Establishing shot. The sky is black with stars and a waxing crescent moon above snow-capped mountains. One of the stars twinkles particularly brightly.
 - Text: and then i asked that child why this night has a star.

Panel 2: We're on one of the snowy mountains. There are several birch trees that lost their leaves for winter, along with a few evergreens. A woman in a sweater walks thru the snow, following a small child in a sundress. The girl glows supernaturally and could possibly the woman when she was younger.
 - Text: and she said, so we'd know that we could see that far."

Panel 3: The woman holds an olde-timey oil lamp with both hands and the child's glowing finger reaches out E.T.-style and ignites the wick.
 - Text: "and for everything given, somthing is gained."

Panel 4: The woman holds the lamp aloft and it shines brightly, illuminating the space around her. She's in the ruins of some sort of church. The floor reomains and some pieces of walls, along with some stairs leading up to a dais on which stands the statue of the goddess Hylia. There are also several evergreen trees around. But the child is nowhere to be seen.
 - Text: "strike one match in the dark and all the world's not the same."

Footnote Text: Text adapted from Trans-Siberian Orchestra's *Dream Child*.
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 08/10/2026
of course you did? what else could you have called him? "Shed?"
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 08/10/2026
I think i might finish this a little early. I'm currently at 912/975 episodes and movies. Just Section 31 and 2½ seasons of DS9 left to go. And i love all of them in their own way (even the bad episodes (of which there are many)), but DS9 and Prodigy are just outstanding.
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 06/10/2026
2372: "i would not become a terrorist. it would be dishonorable." 2373: "i would rather become a domestic terrorist than enjoy a risian vacation with my beautiful trill girlfriend."
DS9 4x22: Worf tells Chief O'Brien that the Maquis are dishonorable for defending their homes from the Cardassians.DS9 5x07: Worf tells Jadzia that he's joined a group of domestic terrorists and sabotaged the global weather control system on Risa.
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 06/10/2026
975 episodes and movies and i think this one genuinely may be my favorite. I guess i'm a sucker for nostalgia bait.
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 05/10/2026
I don't really know anything about mecha, so there probably won't be more of this, but i thought it would be fun to do a Ride by Night mech AU sketch as i try to figure out how to draw again after my surgery. #iDrewThis
A sketchy drawing, drawn by a human woman of two human trans women in a mech hangar.

Woman A is wearing a pilot's uniform which is a skin-tight full body layer with a military style cropped jacket. She's holding a pointy-eared helmet under her arms.

Woman B is in mechanic's coveralls tied up around her waist. She's also got a bandage on her nose and a long, winding tattoo down one arm.

A is all up in B's personal space, pinning her against the leg of a giant robut. B is blushing hard at this. It's super gay, just like you if you read this alt text to the end. 

You're welcome.
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 04/10/2026
it bothers me that the Defiant always docks nose-first at the station, but there's no docking hatch there and it doesn't even line up with the hatch on the station
View of the Defiant docked at DS9 where it's plainly clear that the nose doesn't even cover the entire docking hatch on the station. From DS9 4x20
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 04/10/2026
Jack Ransom understand me.
Jerry O'Connell with brand new teeth that are too big for his mouth. From Lower Decks 4x02
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 03/10/2026
i don't remember if i watched this episode when it first aired. the local affiliate tended to postpone ds9 a lot for baseball games and things. plus my parents would have probably shut it off as soon as they figured out what was happening. but gosh, if it doesn't mean the world to me now.
Lenara Kahn and Jadzia Dax kiss. From DS9 4x06 Rejoined
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 02/10/2026
stop telling october to go back to school, it has too many degrees already
photo of my indoor/outdoor thermometer.

Outdoors:
87.2 F
22% Humidity
87.2 F Heat Index (i'm not entirely sure what this actually means. it generally just seems to be the same as the temperature.)

Indoors:
76.4 F
32% humidity
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 30/09/2026
// Food You'll never guess what day it is.
Photo of several ingredients for making chili: various canned tomato and chile products, spices, chopped onions, ground beef and pork.
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 29/09/2026
riding a train full of college kids is weird
Pavel Chekov: "i was never that young."
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 29/09/2026
there's about half a dozen species of mosquito that feed on human blood and spread deadly diseases to us and none of them seem particularly necessary to the environment
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 28/09/2026
Some episodes are harder to watch than others.
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 28/09/2026
i really want Jadzia's peldor festival dress
Jadzia reads over Morn's renewal scroll during the Peldor Joi festival. She's wearing a purple satiny sundress with dark purple leggings.
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 27/09/2026
My headcanon for Dax living all the way to the 32nd century is that it wanted to go back to Meridian when it reappeared and spend some time in its other dimension.
Lt. Illa Dax, a joined Cardassian/Trill hybrid speaks to SAM about confronting the unknown.
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 21/09/2026
i want to do a skirt variant of the army of light uniform. maybe even a skant version. and i always to lt commander for my rank.
promotional photo of Susan Ivanova in her black s3/4 Babylon 5 uniform
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 21/09/2026
Panel 1: We're inside the Captain's ready room. Captain Solana is ordering from a replicator. Lt. Cmdr. Idaris stands nearby, looking excited.
Solana: Coffee. Black. Can I get anything for you, Commander?
Idaris: Oh! Uh... Iced Andorian vanilla pumpkin spice Vulcan mocha latté raktajino.

Panel 2: Solana looks unimpressed. Idaris's confidence begins to waiver.
Solana: . . .
Idaris. Decaf. Please?

Panel 3: Solana is ordering from the replicator again, more sternly this time. Idaris knows she biffed it.
Solana: Vegetable broth. You need less sugar in your diet.

Text below comic: "Dammit, Ezmi, I'm your captain, not your barista!"
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 21/09/2026
😝
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 21/09/2026
What 4 animals am i? Just 4 of these, in a trench coat. Fun fact: raccoons can't really handle dairy, so don't feed them pizzas. Except for me.
This is a photograph of a raccoon sitting on a couch and eating a whole pizza.
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 18/09/2026
hmm... i do own a few star trek cookbooks....
i'danian spice recipes from Star Trek Cookbook (1999) and The Star Trek Cookbook (2022)
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 11/09/2026
saw this on Tumblr a bit ago and was baffled by the tags. like who sees THIS as such a moral imperative?
screenshot of a Tumblr poll

do you sneak food into movies?
Yes = 80.3%
No = 19.7%
final results from 1,239 votes

tags: #not just No #but Fuck No #i'd rather be shot dead #are you people for real? #i am increasingly convinced tumblr is a lie
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 08/09/2026
Sorry i don't have anything new to share for #StarTrekDay but here's a bunch of stuff i've done over the past few years. Most of it's for my OCs that i draw a comic about. I'm particularly proud of the skant that i sewed from scratch and the time travel comic. #iMadeThis #iDrewThis
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 04/09/2026
meanwhile, SLC doesn't even show up in my top 3 even tho i've lived here my whole life also very disappointed that i spent so long doing the full one and only got these very better limited results
screenshot of my results


Your dialect map

Redder areas talk more like you; bluer areas least.

You talk most like someone from California — about 55% of your answers match a typical resident.
mydialect — extended

Cities most & least like you

Interpolated from the nearest survey responses.
Most similar

    San Francisco, CA (55%)
    Los Angeles, CA (54%)
    Portland, OR (54%)

Least similar

    New Orleans, LA (45%)
    Nashville, TN (45%)
    Atlanta, GA (46%)
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 31/08/2026
only just now realizing i have a medical comic i could have shared, but i'm okay with that
Panel 1: Ezmi Idaris is wearing a medical exam gown and sitting on an exam table. Nearby, Dr Leonid Serebrov is checking some readouts on a tricorder.
Serebrov: I want to start you on benzocyatizine.
Idaris: I'm allergic. Besides, my isoboramine levels are normal for an unjoined Trill.
Serebrov: *No*, they're *not*. Even unjoined Trill need /some/ isoboramine for healthy brain function.

Panel 2: Ezmi points to her nose in illustration of her mixed heritage.
Idaris: But I'm half Bajoran. And the Prophets decided */I/* don't get to have Trill telepathic neurotransmitters. It's been like this since I was a baby. Did you even read my medical history?

Panel 3: Dr Serebrov consults a PADD
Serebrov: Fine. Let's see what makes /Lt. Commander Ezmi Idaris/ */so very special/*.
Serebrov: Hybridization irregularities, telepathic inertness, cybernetic implants, quantum signature variance... Gender dysphoria?

Panel 4: Dr Serebrov is surprised. Ezmi is irritated.
Serebrov: YOU'RE TRANS!?
Idaris: Literally the least interesting thing on that list.

Footnote text beneath the comic: Yes, I *hav* crossed the thin membrane that separates quantum realities. What's that? You'd rather ask about my penis? Cool set of priorities, dude.
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 31/08/2026
my lips are still so chapped at this point that i feel like the most appropriate who analigy would be the waters of mars
a photo from The Waters of Mars, a doctor who tv movie featuring humans who are taken over by ancient martians and express this through having severely chapped lips

at least i think that's what happened? it's been a few years since i've seen it
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 27/08/2026
The Moon is up to wish me luck.
The Moon, as seen by a cell phone camera out the passengers window of a moving car.
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 24/08/2026
hey, what's the normal number of keytars to own if you have no musical ability at all? asking for a friend who really wants to spend $500 she doesn't have on a vintage Casio.
photo from Wikipedia of a Casio AZ-1 keytar from the 1980s. it's probably a good thing they cost so much, i might have already bought one if they were under $200.

i mean my friend might have bought one! 

>.>
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 20/08/2026
Bought it from Media Play for $5, probably in '94. And it's a little scratched up, but i still have it. Track List: Superman (1) Star Trek Suite Alien First Men In The Moon The Black Hole Meteor Battlestar Galactica The Day Time Ended Moonraker The Lost Galaxy Star Wars
Photo of a CD:
Music From The Galaxies
ETTORE STRATA
The London Symphony Orchestra
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 20/08/2026
The only people who know are him and Garak, and i don't think either of them are talking. That being said, the whole thing being revealed by time travel shenanigans is a plot point in this book that came out earlier this year.
Star Trek Picard: To Defy Fate by Dayton Ward

It's basically the most Dayton Ward book to ever be written. And there's not enough Saffi in it.
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 19/08/2026
it is weird that Riker spends his holodeck time pretending to be a MACO. it's like learning that a guy you thought was cool is actually as call of duty bro.
William T Riker in the holodeck, wearing a MACO uniform, shooting his phase pulse rifle at some random aliens.
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 16/08/2026
The idea that it kills you is also a very western way of thinking about it. In Japanese philosophies, the question probably doesn't even make sense.
    "I remembered once, in Japan, having been to see the Gold Pavilion Temple in Kyoto and being mildly surprised at quite how well it had weathered the passage of time since it was first built in the fourteenth century. I was told it hadn’t weathered well at all, and had in fact been burnt to the ground twice in this century. “So it isn’t the original building?” I had asked my Japanese guide.
    “But yes, of course it is,” he insisted, rather surprised at my question.
    “But it’s burnt down?”
    “Yes.”
    “Twice.”
    “Many times.”
    “And rebuilt.”
    “Of course. It is an important and historic building.”
    “With completely new materials.”
    “But of course. It was burnt down.”
    “So how can it be the same building?”
    “It is always the same building.”
    I had to admit to myself that this was in fact a perfectly rational point of view, it merely started from an unexpected premise. The idea of the building, the intention of it, its design, are all immutable and are the essence of the building. The intention of the original builders is what survives. The wood of which the design is constructed decays and is replaced when necessary. To be overly concerned with the original materials, which are merely sentimental souvenirs of the past, is to fail to see the living building itself.

Douglas Adams, Last Chance to See
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 15/08/2026
The Acts of the Emissary is now a canonical book in my comic.
Skeet from Una McCormack
@unamccormack.bsky.social

“So I lied, I cheated, I bribed men to cover the crimes of other men. I am an accessory to murder. But the most damning thing of all, I think I can live with it. And if I had to do it all over again, I would.” Acts of the Emissary 6: 19.

She's quoting a skeet from
Jonathan Edward Durham
 @thisone0verhere.bsky.social

What’s your favorite Bible verse? (Wrong answers only)

11:29 AM · Aug 15, 2026
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 15/08/2026
// Food Okay so i asked on a discord if french bread pizza is a thing outside the US and Canadia and was SHOCKED that most the responses i got were people in america telling me they'd never heard of it. Is this just a food that's fallen out of favor so younglings these days don't know it?
A photo of french bread pizza, which is when you get a loaf of french* bread from the grocery store, cut it down the middle lengthwise, and use as a pizza crust.

* this is what we call it here, but i don't think it could be legally sold as bread in France
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 13/08/2026
It's also kinda similar to the visitor badge from PIC. My guess is it's either based on the Generations logo or is an early version of that.
Admiral JL Picard (retired) visiting Starfleet Headquarters.
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 12/08/2026
Your favorite Disney Princess (wrong answers only)
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 09/08/2026
I think it would be fun to do a Jenny Mudge cosplay, except that literally no human would recognize it. They'd just be like "are you dressed as the concept of 1979?"
An illustration from CYOA #9 Who Killed Harlowe Thrombey. There's 4 people here, but it's not super clear what their relationship is to each other is in time or space, so i'll just divide it into quadrants.

Top left: The Boy has been tied in a chair, but has managed to remove the towel that was wrapped around his head. Luckily for him, basically this exact same thing totally isn't going to happen again a year later in the sequal.

Top right: Jenny Mudge, The Boy's rival and the true genius kid detective of the book. She's got 70s curly blonde hair with a hairband, a white button-up blouse, a plaid midi skirt, and sneakers.

Bottom left: A cop points a gun at Dr Robert Lipscum's back.

Bottom right: Dr Robert Lipscum. Nobody likes Dr Robert Lipscum.
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 08/08/2026
"I'm gonna stop buying choose your own adventure books," she lied. Like a liar.
My shelf of interactive fiction books. There's about 150 of them, with maybe ¾ being Choose Your Own Adventure™ branded, and the rest coming from other publishers.

Both CYOA board games and the tarot deck are also in the middle, with the legos diorama from my profile banner sitting atop them.

Fun fact: i realized after taking this picture that my 2nd copy of Space and Beyond wasn't on the shelf at the time. So if you were worried that i don't have the 90s reissue cover that's trying to be a kid-friendly version of a Frank Frazetta painting, don't be. I definitely have it.
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 08/08/2026
i thought it might be something like that 🤭 i did try to invoke some GSL stuff in the design, altho i don't know how successful that was
The railroad causeway that splits the great salt lake. Water to the south is green/blue, water to the north is red/pink.
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 07/08/2026
This is a book cover i invented for @monsterologist.bsky.social for her birthday because she's kinda one of the coolest humans i know. #iDrewThis
A book cover vaguely in the style of a Choose Your Own Adventure™ book, but with different fonts and stylings so it's Legally Distinct.

It's a "You Determine Your Destiny" book titled "The Monstrous Mystery of Lake Bonneville." The illustration has the Wasatch mountains and Antelope Island and the Great Salt Lake.

Behind the mountains, dominating most of the scene is a huge kaiju pinkish red creature with a green underbelly and lots of little hairs flowing out of their back.

There's also a large Samantha in overalls, but she's only metaphorically large. It's not my intention that poison from the lake has grown her to kaiju size. Altho, maybe? I dunno.
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 05/08/2026
9. My favorite Choose Your Own Adventure book is The Enchanted Kingdom. It's everything you want from a CYOA: complex stories that actually make sense, choice points where your decisions matter, and amazing horrible child deaths! Plus: it teaches you about dealing with the fair folk.
Choose Your Own Adventure (Bantam) #56: The Enchanted Kingdom by Ellen Kushner. (You're the star of the story! Choose from 22 possible endings.)

The cover illustration features a non-binary child holding a cool sword. Behind them are some trolls, the fairy queen, a circle of standing stones, and the full moon.
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Revenge of the Pizza Raccoon @raccoon.pizza · 03/08/2026
it's not fair that they put her in a video game but never released an actual minifig
Doreen Green in one of the lego marvel superheroes video games
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