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lord help me im guzzin again

@poobletoods.bsky.social

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ouhhhhhg. a

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 13/08/2026

ok bye bye for another 4 months probably lmao

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 13/08/2026

fungal evolution case study

Five drawings of different versions of LDG. The first is pre-death, and she is known as [NAME EXPUNGED]. She is a young human woman with light brown skin, deep brown eyes, and dark hair in a pair of intricate buns. She wears a colorful huipil and a large gemstone earring in the shape of a beetle. The second is freshly dead, and she is called Scarab. She is now pale and gaunt, and there are streaks of white in her hair. White tendrils climb up her body, some disappearing into her skin. Her eyes are wide, with dilated pupils and a blue glow that also emanates from her nose and mouth. She wears ceremonial attire, including an intricate headdress with quetzal feathers and a carving that resembles a beetle's head. The third is her canon design, LDG. The fourth is post-canon, in which she is a grey husk. She still wears her broken glasses over dark, empty eyes, and a button up shirt that's a bit too big for her. The fifth is an alternate universe design that mostly resembles canon LDG, though this version goes by Lily. She wears a smaller style of glasses with rims on the bottom rather than the top, and the black streaks in her hair are now grey. She has blue irises, lighter yellow sclera, and slightly more saturated blue skin. Her cheeks show a slight flush, something absent from all other versions except [NAME EXPUNGED].

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 13/08/2026

*chiikawas your bigtop burgers*

Bigtop Burger characters as little Chiikawa animals. Cesare is a pointy-eared dog, Steve and Munkustrap are cats, Conrad is a cow, Allen is a mouse, Frances is a weasel, Penny and her daughter are bunnies, Billie is a bat, and Tim is a koala.

Caligari and LDG in the same style, as a sheep and a beetle respectively.

lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 13/08/2026

love the fungus keep the fungus

ldg holding onto caligari's hand while looking grumpy, ldg lying across cal's hand while he holds her up to his face, and L kissing between his thumb and forefinger

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 13/08/2026

im still hoping they have another baby before jigglefig is at capacity

Kenji the caldg baby. he looks a lot like LDG, but with slightly deeper blue skin and shorter curlier hair, and bright blue sclera. he has LDG's hair streaks. next to him are doodles of LDG and caligari. LDG is gesturing to him and saying "behold our flawless offspring," and caligari has a cigar floating vaguely near his face.

drawing of a young child kenji sitting on the floor looking at his baby sister, who has a giant mushroom for a head. she is declaring "BA."

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 13/08/2026

LIKE A HAAAAAAAAAAAALOOOOOOOOOOO

A drawing of LDG and Caligari, with only Cal's hands being seen. LDG lies on her back in the palm of Caligari's hand, dangling partially between his fingers to smile vaguely at the viewer. Her clothes and glasses are gone, leaving her hair to hang loosely and exposing the glowing holes in her chest. Her mycelium stalk wraps around Caligari's wrist and disappears into the darkness. Around her neck is a thick steel chain, which Caligari's other hands are pulling into the shape of a heart around her. One of her arms reaches out to grasp the chain, while the other holds onto one of Caligari's fingers. Caligari's hands are made visible only by the light emanating from LDG's chest, and the glowing spores peeking out from under his gloves.

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 13/08/2026

oh god she smoked the forever weed

LDG after getting way too high. Her hair is in two messy buns and she's wearing casual clothes. She's lying in the palm of Caligari's hand, grasping his fingers for dear life. With big teary eyes, she asks, "Ajaw, would you still love me if I was a worm?" Caligari hesitantly replies, "O-of course, my dear."

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 13/08/2026

safest place to be is in the arms of a monster that loves you

A drawing of Caligari, holding LDG in his hands lovingly as he pets her head with one finger and she holds one of his hands close. She looks up at him with a content smile. Around them are written various nicknames that he has for her: my beautiful butterfly, my loyal keeper, my precious pearl, my scarab, my pet, my dear one, my masterpiece, my queen, and my little diamond.

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 13/08/2026

snorrrrrk mimimimi

calla lily au caligari and LDG sleeping in bed, with L lying on top of cal.

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 13/08/2026

fungus field trip

A drawing of LDG standing in a rainy forest, looking up into the sky and holding her hands out to feel the rain. She has a slight smile and is soaking wet.

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 13/08/2026

akathisia

A drawing of LDG lying on her back with her arms splayed out. She appears as she does at after Caligari is killed, grey and slightly withered. Below the torso she has a mass of ripped filaments that are oozing blue liquid onto the ground around her. Two sets of footprints are tracked through the liquid, arranged in a pattern that indicates two people dancing in a circle around her. She looks up at nothing in particular, her eyes blank and her glasses cracked.

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 13/08/2026

theyre soooo good at communicating

Post-canon LDG and Cesare glaring at each other viciously, each with one hand clenching Cesare's cane, which he seems to have been using to point at her. L is sitting in a wheelchair and her glasses are cracked. She's screaming at Cesare, "He loved me more than anyone has ever loved you, you worthless rat!" with her dialogue written in the type style usually used for Caligari.

LDG and Cesare sitting at a table or bar with drinks in their hands. They are both beaten up. Cesare has a bloody nose, a black eye, bruising around his neck, and bite marks on his hands. L has three big gashes on her face, likely from Cesare's fingernails, and bruises on her face and knuckles. They are both scowling, Cesare is looking at L but she is staring into the distance.
L: I despise you with every fiber of my being.
Cesare: Then leave.
L: Fuck you.

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 13/08/2026

ahehe. giggle.

Caligari holding LDG while they look at each other lovingly. L is hooking a finger through his bowtie flirtatiously. She's also dressed in casual clothes, and one of Caligari's hands is slipping under her shirt.

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 13/08/2026

......do i know you from somewhere

A drawing of a woman in a cave, examining the blue-capped mushrooms on the walls. She has light brown skin and dark wavy hair, and is wearing a colorful huipil and an earring shaped like a beetle. Her hair is in two buns that each have a tuft sprouting from their center. She is holding one of the mushrooms in her hand and looking over her shoulder curiously. Behind her, we see the glow of hundreds more of the mushrooms in the surrounding cave.

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 13/08/2026

hold wife like burger

the meme of a cartoon bulldog holding a kitten in one fist while putting a hand to his chin in thought, next to a drawing of the same thing but with caligari as the dog and LDG as the kitten

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 13/08/2026

my fucking beloved

LDG sitting in the palm of Caligari's disembodied hand. She has one arm around his thumb and is smiling smugly. There are tiny blue hearts in her eyes.

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 13/08/2026

go my sappy au bullshit

Caligari and LDG in their humanoid forms. L looks like a normal person, but Caligari has a bunch of glowing hollow mushrooms where a head would be. He's also covered in tiny feathery filaments that resemble body hair. They both appear to be naked at least from the waist up. LDG is draping an arm around Caligari from behind and holding onto the largest of his mushrooms while she kisses it. He is using one of his six arms to gently hold her comparatively tiny hand. Puffs of heart-shaped spore clouds dance around them.

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 13/08/2026

whoaaaa you can do so many images at once now

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 13/08/2026

completely forgot i made this account. hi <3

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 20/03/2026

favoritism

LDG standing in front of a collection of drawings pinned to a board, showing various weapons, as well as sketches of Cesare's watcher hammer. She looks away from it to ask, "Your thoughts?" Caligari's disembodied voice replies "Yesss... brilliant work, my scarab."

Caligari uses his threads to lower a stack of books from the ceiling, saying, "The tomes you... requested... dear one." LDG reaches for them and says "Ah, wonderful," looking pleased.

LDG lying in the palm of Caligari's hand, lounging like a cat in a tree. Caligari is stroking his fingers along her back affectionately.

Caligari commanding Cesare, "Spider. Go collect more garbage to entertain the doves." Cesare, holding a shovel, walks in the direction Caligari is pointing, grumbling "yes sir." He looks less than thrilled.

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 20/03/2026

rome ants

Three sketches of LDG and Caligari. In the first, Caligari is scratching under L's chin while she giggles happily, and in the second she is kissing one of his fingers. In the third he's brushing swirls of his mist over her neck and face while she leans into him and whispers, "ooh, ajaw..."

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 20/03/2026

kissies <3

Caligari holding LDG while she sticks her face into the empty space where his head would be. Puffs of blue smoke or mist or spores shoot out from beneath his hat.

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 20/03/2026

this is how most of their encounters go i imagine

Cesare slides into view to greet a customer from inside the Zomburger truck. He is mortal and old. His hair is a bit softer and curlier than in canon and he is dressed in a v-neck, jacket, and choker. He's also got tiny skull earrings. "Aaalright, how can we ruin your day, valued custome--"

He stops, annoyed, as he looks down and sees whoever is outside the truck. "Oh. This shit again."

LDG looks up at him, unimpressed. "Hello, Cesare."

Cesare leans out of the truck window to look at her, saying "Looks like you figured out the legs. Good for you." LDG replies, "Indeed. And rather unfortunate for you."

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 19/03/2026

what the hell is ever happening on this website

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 19/03/2026

gotta take good care of your wifesona <3

three sketches of LDG. in the first she is trying to stretch out her back, thinking, "Grrrghh, why can I even get sore?" in the second, two giant fingers reach into frame and rest on her back as she peeks over in surprise. in the third, one of caligari's arms gently massages her as she sighs and thanks him.

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 19/03/2026

new neighbors

A drawing of Caligari and LDG as they appear in an AU. Caligari is a tall, faceless fat man with six arms, dressed as he is in canon with the addition of some nice pants and dress shoes. LDG also looks mostly the same as her canon appearance, but with legs and a pair of boots. They are holding hands. Text in the image reads, "Mr. & Mrs. Caligari." Janus and Lily, a couple of totally normal people who are not planning anything evil or sinister. (Don't ask why Janus has no head and six arms and too many joints in said arms. That would be a very rude thing to ask.)"

lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 19/03/2026

he's a softie for exactly one (1) person

A drawing of Caligari and LDG. They both have legs and are generally humanoid, though Caligari still has six arms and no face. He's tipping his hat and offering L a bouquet of rotting wood, moldy food, and animal parts. She is blushing with a silly little smile and flipping a hand at him coyly, saying "Oh, you."

lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 19/03/2026

can't kill her in a way that matters

A drawing of LDG. In the middle of a thunderstorm, she has climbed out of the hole in the ground that the other characters emerged from. She's standing unsteadily on two patchwork legs woven together by the loose threads of her torso, and is bracing herself on the broken handle of Cesare's hammer. Her hair is down, she is soaked by the rain, and she is staring at the viewer with one crazed eye that glows bright blue. Wrapped around her body are the tattered remains of Caligari's coat. In the dark sky behind her, there is a flash of lightning shaped suspiciously like his threads.

lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 18/03/2026

ok ill do the rest later im tired

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 18/03/2026

bad news babygirl she IS the upper management

A drawing of Caligari and LDG. LDG has legs instead of the mycelium stalk I usually draw her with, she's wearing pants that match her blazer and big chunky boots. Caligari is leaning over her and using two of his hands to dip her as if they're dancing. She holds onto the loose ends of his bowtie as she leans back, exhaling a trail of his spores. She smiles subtly at the viewer, and in unison she and Caligari say, "Oh, Cesare... Did you think you had an ally in me?"

lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 18/03/2026

photos taken moments before disaster

A simplistic four-panel comic of LDG. In the first panel, she sits calmly at her desk rifling through papers.

She suddenly shouts "Then die!" and slams her fists on the desk, scattering her papers. The style of her dialogue indicates it is Caligari's voice coming through her.

She stares blankly after the outburst as the papers settle.

Back to being calm and collected, she picks up the scattered papers while saying, "Well, someone up there is about to get it."

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 18/03/2026

he loves herrrrrrrr haha nerd

Four sketches of LDG interacting with Caligari's hands. In the first, she is reverently kissing one of his fingers. In the second, she is holding onto his thumb while he pats her head with his index finger. In the third, he is using one hand to pin her to a wall in a sensual manner. She is smiling seductively and her mycelium stalk is wrapping around his arm. Small artist's note next to this drawing reads "prettier pinned up, huh?" embellished with a smug smiley face. In the fourth drawing, L is lying on the floor resting her head in Caligari's palm. She appears to be asleep, and he has used a second hand to remove her glasses.

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 18/03/2026

god's favorite princess vs a wet rat they pulled out of a gutter

A drawing of LDG and Cesare. LDG is sitting at her desk with a smug smile. On the wall behind her is a plaque that reads "Employee of the century," under which are a bunch of photos of her from different eras. The most recent photo is her canon design, while the rest are based on historical clothing and hairstyles. Cesare stands next to her desk, looking annoyed, saying, "Rigged."

lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 18/03/2026

oh this is gonna be a long one. au where

Extremely sketchy drawings. In this one, Caligari directs LDG by saying "go my scarab" as she stumbles around on the surface with a new pair of legs. An arrow pointing to her is labeled "hasn't had legs in thousands of years." L is thinking "what the fuck"

LDG driving a car with a humanoid Caligari crammed into the back seat. His arms are either folded in front of him or hanging out the open windows. They are both thinking "I want that twink obliterated."

LDG hugs Caligari's somewhat humanoid body and sadly says "I miss your sexy spider bod." A thought bubble shows she is thinking about Caligari's canon form. Caligari pats her back comfortingly.

A version of Caligari's humanoid form in which LDG is sitting inside him, almost like a mech pilot. He has only two arms, and with LDG's head where his would be, they almost resemble a normal human. Text reads, "They can do this if they need Cal to have a face and a normal number of arms. They're still massive but it's a little more convincing. Maybe if they have a change of heart about beating Cesare's ass and imprisoning cryptids they can just live on the surface like this, Garnet style." A smaller doodle in the corner shows Caligari standing behind LDG to show their relative scale. He is several feet taller than her.

lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 18/03/2026

cesare is so done with them

A drawing of LDG and Caligari. LDG is lying across the back of Caligari's hand as he lifts her up to the empty space where his face would be. She is affectionately twirling his spore cloud with one finger, her head resting on her other hand. She looks calm and content.

A much messier and less detailed version of the same scene, this time with Cesare in the background. He is frustratedly yelling, "You are two cloves of the same freak ass parasitic portobello." The mycelium stalk that connects LDG to Caligari is also visible now, illustrating Cesare's point. There are a few lines on Caligari's "face" to indicate a blush.

lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 18/03/2026

and here we see me enter of the gap moe era of my caldg madness

A three-panel sketch comic of LDG. In the first panel, she sits at her desk, writing. In the second, her free hand reaches out and grasps at the air of its own accord. She looks at it in confusion. In the third panel, she smiles a little and says, "That's one of mine, dear." From somewhere unseen, Caligari says, "Ah. Apologies, my Scarab," and her hand is returned to her control.

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 18/03/2026

dressing up to go to her dumbass employee's 37th wedding and scowl at everyone there

A drawing of LDG wearing a dress loosely inspired by the fashions of the early twentieth century. It has short puffy sleeves and a long skirt that drags the ground, hiding her lack of legs. It's mostly black with white stripes, and a sheer blue-grey section covers her upper chest and her arms down to her wrists. Instead of her usual glasses, she has more old-fashioned round spectacles with gold accents. Her hair is up in twists and adorned with a golden leaf-shaped accessory. She is also wearing three necklaces of varying length, each with a single nebulous shape charm.

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 18/03/2026

i think he likes to just fuck with them sometimes

Bigtop Burger fanart. LDG stands next to Caligari, who is pointing at someone off screen and saying "Count how many rock is here, spider. That is your first assignment." LDG is glancing at him, confused.

An unnamed watcher, who looks tired and broken, says "Okay." and begins counting, presumably looking at the rocks on the floor.

Caligari listens with a hand under his nonexistent chin as the unseen watcher continues to count in the background. LDG, enraged, stares at Caligari and clenches her fists. Through clenched teeth, she says "Why the fuck would you make him do that?"

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 18/03/2026

quality on these is gonna be dusty dog ass cuz i'm literally just copy pasting from tumblr because im bad at naming files

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 18/03/2026

interrupting their freak time. die.

A drawing of Caligari and LDG. Caligari's coat and shirt are slightly opened, revealing a cluster of glowing mushrooms inside. LDG lounges on top of these mushrooms, comfortably disheveled, with her glasses off and her hair down. Her coat is unbuttoned and is starting to slide off her shoulders. From the waist down, her body consists of a twisting mass of mycelium that extends to the floor. She is glaring at the viewer and exhaling clouds of Caligari's spore mist through her nose. Two of Caligari's hands are folded neatly on the ground in front of him and the others are off screen.

lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 18/03/2026

✅ erotic spore inhalation

A drawing of Caligari and LDG. Caligari is holding LDG delicately with two hands around her body and one cupping her head. She is pulling him in by his suit collar. The mist that makes up Caligari's body is swirling into her mouth as she breathes in, tilting her head as if kissing him. Her eyes have a faint blue glow at the edges.

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lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 18/03/2026

do yall tag stuff here. #bigtopburger. go my mushroom freaks

Fanart of LDG and Caligari from Bigtop Burger. Caligari holds LDG up with one hand at her "hip," and is holding out three other hands to her with only a finger or two extended. She holds one of his fingertips delicately, with her other hand taken gently between his finger and thumb. She holds her arms as if she is dancing, about to be spun. Caligari tilts her face towards his lack-thereof with the back of yet another finger and says, "THE PRETTIEST BUTTERFLY IN MY COLLECTION…" The tail of LDG's speech bubble trails fondly around his shoulders as she points out, "I am literally you."

lord help me im guzzin again @poobletoods.bsky.social · 18/03/2026

alright. prepare for caldg.