EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 11hPrimeape is the safety that will shoot through the A-Gap on 4th and 1 and take the running back’s life. 020
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 14hYou either die wondering who the fuck that is on the mic or live long enough to become the person to be singing Adele’s ‘Hello’ at 8:37 in the morning while shoving a shotgun directly up the strike boss’ ass. #Destiny2 000
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 16hI’m resilient as all get out. Couldn’t stay down if I tried. 110
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 07/10/2026I’m sorry in advance for what you’re about to see. 010
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 07/10/2026He was. Then his health went, and he’s almost single-handedly derailed our offense for four straight weeks. 210
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 07/10/2026Enjoy your new Center! I haven’t the faintest idea how Howie got 2 picks out of this, but I’ll take it. 110
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 07/10/2026Ben Johnson is going to be the head coach of this team for at least the next decade. 010
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 06/10/2026God, I can’t wait to read the headline that Nick is fired. He doesn’t do the most basic shit!!!! 000
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 06/10/2026Enjoy your retirement, you absolute legend. They’ll be fitting you for a gold jacket sooner than later. GO BIRDS! 000
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 04/10/2026You must consider: Braden Mann is that fucking guy and the Rams’ special teams is still ass. 000
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 02/10/2026Isn’t great. But we’re still gonna find a way! Now that Vic is done watching the Phillies’ perennial first-round exit, he’s going to lock in. 000
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 02/10/2026This whole coverup shit has to go. There’s no adversity, HE IS A SEX PEST. #NFL 000
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 01/10/2026It’s because TMac is so good that we Cokeheads are eating as well as we are. Pulls defenders like nobody’s business! 000
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 01/10/2026For what the words are worth, you absolutely are worthy of love. And you’re also cool as hell! I hope you keep going. 000
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 01/10/2026If David Attenborough were at the gym with me, I imagine it’d sound like this: “With sweat on her brow and hunger in her belly, the beast stalks her prey: the free machine.” With me huffing and puffing after the leg press. 000
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 30/09/2026It ought to be the standard, followed by prison time. 000
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 29/09/2026He’s going to watch how Flores turned the Bears’ offense off like a lightswitch and still stick with the light box. I’m dreading it, but also, Jalen can win us a shootout against the Bears efense (no D to be found; the Vikings don’t count.) Go Birds!! 000
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 27/09/2026Jacoby Brissett is so funny. What do you MEAN he’s throwing 10 more completions than most QBs throw attempts? What do you mean he has 10-15 more attempts than that???? #Cardinals #NFL 000
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 27/09/2026It appears the solution to the Mike Mac defense is old QBs. 100
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 27/09/2026Josh Allen looks like absolute shit, dear god. #NFL #Bills 010
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 27/09/2026No. No, we don’t. -An eagles fan since childhood. 000
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 25/09/2026It’s batshit crazy. I was like ‘lol, they might lose to the falcons’ and THEY ARE DOWN BY THREE TOUCHDOWNS. 020
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 24/09/2026Greg Rousseau is going to punch the ball out of Omarion Hampter’s hands at least twice. I’m calling it now. Also, I pick option 2; videos are going to be made about this game. We’re gonna look back and be saying things like Josh Allen pulled the plug out of the wall. 001
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 23/09/2026Bi visibility day carries the feeling of being a squirrel that someone is shining a high-powered flashlight at point blank. But it’s also nice, thank you! 011
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 23/09/2026The Ben Johnson offense being completely dismantled by ‘send the fucking house, that’s it, that’s the playbook’ is so goddamn funny. 130
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 22/09/2026Then the saying applies: ‘never interrupt your enemy when they’re making a mistake.’ 010
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 22/09/2026Torn between calling my adult friends ‘adorable’ and worrying that it’s too infantilizing. 000
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 22/09/2026I don’t know if surviving the falling-apart Giants—who are at the mercy of Harbaugh and the MetLife turf demon at the same time—gets them out of the ‘potential fraud’ zone. 000
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 21/09/2026People hit the easy targets while they’re warming up. And when haven’t we been the ‘easy targets’? 030
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 21/09/2026I’m happy we won, but Cam Jurgens needs to get off the field. Awful blocking all game and he caused Jalen’s second interception. The DLine is also worrying, especially because we’re up against the Bears next—who are absolutely going to lean on the run just like they did last year. #Eagles #NFL 000
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 21/09/2026He’s saved our ass from the awful OLine play two games in a row. That second pick was Cam Jurgens’ fault!!! 010
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 18/09/2026As Raw Room’s King Dunlap says, ‘it’s only holding if they throw the flag.’ 101
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 18/09/2026I think they’re cooked. And the Dan Campbell era is crashing and burning before our very eyes. 000
EnbyousPancake @pancakerider.bsky.social · 18/09/2026On one hand… I’m sorry for what you’re about to witness. On the other... my team that lives and dies on Jahmyr Gibbs is notably less sorry. 000