iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Let's have a moment of silence for all the men who lost their girlfriends in the Ukrainian attack on Russian data centers.

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I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but the hard truth is that literally everyone is judged by their appearance long before they are judged by their words. It's true for both men and women. Men who dress and look like a Chippendales dancer get treated the same as women who dress like pole dancers.

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No, we aren't embracing Socialism because we know the truth: true socialism cannot function without some type of leadership structure, and leadership structures almost always end with a single individual making all the decisions

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Let's have a moment of silence for all the men who lost their girlfriends in the Ukrainian attack on Russian data centers.

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Nyx Fluffpaw @nyxfluffpaw.bsky.social · 12h

Not much better. Still a shitty solution.

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Most of us don't want to risk a felony conviction that will stay on our record for life and make it impossible to even live. There is no guarantee that the next President will pardon anyone who "stands up".

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Nyx Fluffpaw @nyxfluffpaw.bsky.social · 12h

Just like turning your electronics off and turning them back on again doesn't fucking solve the problem.

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Nyx Fluffpaw @nyxfluffpaw.bsky.social · 12h

Let's have a moment of silence for all the men who lost their girlfriends in the Ukrainian attack on Russian data centers.

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"Shock Jocks" appeal to some people, apparently. Look up how many fans Howard Stern has.

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If that hard truth makes you uncomfortable, that's on you. I have understood that truth for a very long time. Knowing that I cannot stop men from getting horny isn't "blaming the victim", it's being realistic and understanding a hard truth about life.

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It's just like with aggressively horny men. You're never going to stop men from getting horny, but you can make sure they don't find you sexually attractive.

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Did you not read what I was saying? I'm saying that you're never going to stop thieves from stealing, but you can make sure they don't steal from you.

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That's not "blaming the victim", that's making the victim more aware of themselves and how they are perceived by everyone else.

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You want to stop a thief, you literally have to think like them. Likewise with aggressively horny men - you want to stop them, you have to think like them and understand what about you they find so attractive, then make yourself less attractive to them.

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Anything that screams "there's money and valuables in this house" visible from the street, makes you a target for thieves.

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Boy toys visible from the street by anyone jogging past your house? It's eye candy to a thief. That big super-ultra-mega OLED TV on the wall in your living room? If you can see it from the sidewalk outside your house, so can a thief.

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Thieves' minds are simple: if they don't see it, it doesn't exist. Hide your valuables and you won't have to worry about them being stolen.

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Blaming both people is the point: "if you had not left your valuables in plain sight, a thief would not have broken your window and stolen them"

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Take theft, for example. Thieves are never going to stop stealing. You're wasting your time if you think thieves will ever develop morals. So when someone leaves valuables plainly visible in their car and a thief breaks the window and steals the valuables, we blame both parties. 2/2

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Here in Kansas City, we don't call it "blaming the victim", we call it "raising awareness of how you are making yourself a target". 1/2

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You're not going to get very far in life by having an "I don't care what people think about me" attitude and fragile emotions that make you feel uncomfortable with insults or hard words.

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If you don't respect yourself, why should people respect you?

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Here's the thing that you have to understand: people who grew up in the middle and upper classes know cheap clothes and cheap suits when they see them. We don't need clothes with the brand name or logo on the outside because we "just know". We expect people to put effort into their appearance.

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Maybe you should do the same.

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I live my real life in such a way that I am boring and forgettable. Dismissed the moment people turn their backs on me. But guess what? I have never had to deal with anyone sexually harassing me.

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When you spend every waking moment of your life trying to be the most obvious person in the room, you should not be surprised if and when you get unwanted attention. Sometimes being the most boring person in the room is better and less stressful.

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And this experience isn't just about women - it applies to men, too. Men who dress and look like a Chippendales dancer get the same treatment as women who dress like pole dancers.

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So yeah, my own personal experience in this experiment showed me that when you dress in revealing clothes, you will get treated like someone who works at a strip club. Likewise, if you dress like people on "the people of Walmart" satire website, you will get very poor treatment.

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So I speak from experience on this topic, not to defend anyone else's comments on the topic.

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It showed me the hard, uncomfortable truth: you are judged by your appearance long before you are judged by your words.

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I went from buying the cheapest clothes I could find and not caring if they had holes in them to paying for good clothes like khakis and polo shirts and a military style haircut, and got treated much better in middle and upper class venues.

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Then I decided to do a personal experiment to see how people reacted when I actually started caring about what I wore. It was a stark contrast - when I walked into places like Macy's or Nordstrom wearing discount store bargain basement clothes, I was treated worse than when I wore good clothes.

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Who said I was defending it? I was simply stating a truth: that people are judged by what they wear and how they present themselves, even before they start talking. I actually speak from experience on that because I used to be the type of person who didn't care what people thought of me.

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Apparently many people think SNL is meant to be taken seriously. It's a comedy show. Hurling insults at people is how they do things.

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You act like I care what you say. I do not.

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Even as an adult, I still get treated badly because of my neurodivergence and how it makes me process the world.

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That "hurt so badly I became antisocial" didn't happen overnight. It has been happening most of my life. I grew up in the 1980s and 1990s, back when not much was known about neurodivergence. People actually believed "it's just an excuse doctors use to explain out of control children".

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I'm a blue collar worker. Hurling insults at each other is just a fact of life among blue collar workers. You have to grow some skin and learn not to let words hurt you.

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It's not my job to coddle to people's fragile emotions. If people can't handle shit-talk or "hard words", that's on them, not me.

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Oh, so you want me to be a kiss-ass then. No. Fuck off.

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