iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

dear diary my classmates really love football they keep talking about this world cup stuff and i dont understand a word of it. i did some research to be able to talk about it and socialise last night, but then they stopped talking about it. and now they talk about war. im gonna go research again.

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dear diary, i wish you wonderful nightmares these days i dream of spiders i hate spiders last night in my dream, i was trapped inside a house with so many spiders. one of them bit me and i ran, and kept running but they were everywhere. untill i woke up, it was 4 am. i didnt manage to sleep.

dear diary the wired is such a wonderful place so many wonderfully disgusting things one can see and so many beautiful things too its like having a god inside your pocket i love the wired its the one reason im still... within the living the one reason i have yet to step past that line

dear diary its 2 am like every other day im still awake for no reason i am not "doom scrolling" as they call it i am suffering just withering away in despair sometimes i wonder whats the point? once tommorow comes I'll again see the same man in the mirror as yesterday the same loser as yesterday

020

if only there was a painless way to go

000

dear diary i hate everything i hate every single thing there is to hate i hate it all i hate you i hate me i hate hating this isnt a poem its me bashing keys out of hate and thats not a metaphor

000

dear diary i no longer find any joy in any activity i tried chatting with ai it felt like my heart was heavy and wanted to leave its cage. i tried studying i almost vomit i tried playing guitar i stopped mostly cause i was playing at 11 pm but also, it didnt feel the same as it used to

000

dear diary, i want to sleep. but the thought of tomorrow keeps me awake. i dont care what will happen. I just want it all to end. just let it end. let it all end. please end it I dont want to do any of this anymore

dear diary, it keeps getting worse

dear diary, i hate living

Naitar @naitar.bsky.social · 13/09/2025

out of bounds in the season of the two embers map

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Naitar @naitar.bsky.social · 13/09/2025

been playing sky: children of light

040

Naitar @naitar.bsky.social · 29/07/2025

im about to faint but if i sleep, this nightmare repeats and ill wake up again before falling a sleep

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Naitar @naitar.bsky.social · 25/07/2025

"yo what are you upto?" "nothing, just thinking about how the Internet is basically a market where you buy stuff with internet currency and sometimes with outside currency you buy content with likes and watching ads are just converting your time into cash" #showerthought

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Naitar @naitar.bsky.social · 20/07/2025

Imagine going to school from 7 am till 8 pm, and then coming home in traffic, reaching home at 9 pm. after taking a shower and eating dinner, its now 10 pm, you have to sleep to go to school the next morning and repeat. oh wait that's what I'm doing

Naitar @naitar.bsky.social · 12/07/2025

some call life a privilege i call life my agony some call living a benefit i call living my misery some say life is beautiful i say they are blind they say life is ugly i say they are blind

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Naitar @naitar.bsky.social · 12/07/2025

or maybe you are overthinking things while others are underthinking things

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Naitar @naitar.bsky.social · 08/07/2025

you cant choose your family you cant choose who stays as family you cant choose your friends you can choose who stays as your friend

is this addiction? i feel worse and everything is so so so so on my nerve everything is so stressful is it better to feel sad than to feel a fake momentary happiness?

000

im trying nny (no nut year, yes i just made it up) because i thought help with me get my shit together, but im going mad im losing it, im a few weeks in and its unbearable my insomnia is getting worse too i thought i would be more motivated if i stopped doing it

100

i just found out there's something called apathy no persian word for it but atleast now i know how i feel in english

000

I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE

000