Matthew Perren @matthewperren.bsky.social · 6hIt’s a happy accident for him that he can cash in on his ugly character traits 010
Matthew Perren @matthewperren.bsky.social · 6hYou only say something is “perfectly normal” when you absolutely know it is not. 010
Matthew Perren @matthewperren.bsky.social · 8hThere’s a Brecht play about this. With songs by Kurt Weill 020
Matthew Perren @matthewperren.bsky.social · 9hThree mars bars and a maccies chocolate milkshake does it for me. I’m cutting edge. Living in the future. 010
Matthew Perren @matthewperren.bsky.social · 12hThe sooner we can get a universal agreement that killing people is wrong, the better There should be some sort of law or something. 000
Matthew Perren @matthewperren.bsky.social · 19hAI wrote the document and no one checked the output like any other AI mark. 030
Matthew Perren @matthewperren.bsky.social · 19hSomeone had the idea and went, yeah! Gave the spec to a designer who went, yeah! Handed it to a manufacturer who went, yeah! Who showed it to a retailer who went, yeah! A stylist saw it and went, yeah! And then he’s shown it as a potential fit and went, YEAH! That’s a LOT of folk with no class 000
Matthew Perren @matthewperren.bsky.social · 19hWhat disturbs me about this is that, at no point in the design process of the entire outfit, did anyone stop and say, “Wait. I think this might…just…look like shit.” 100
Matthew Perren @matthewperren.bsky.social · 19hThere’s really no excuse for any of it. Put on a shirt Put on socks Put on a not-gold suit PUT ON VISIBLE SHOES 120
Matthew Perren @matthewperren.bsky.social · 19hAnd they’re as shit at it as everything else they do 000
Matthew Perren @matthewperren.bsky.social · 08/10/2026I’m pretty sure, given a couple of hours and enough cheap cider, I could write an Allister Heath headline generator 040
Matthew Perren @matthewperren.bsky.social · 07/10/2026Jesus Christ. In the 70s it was safer to get off the train at Finsbury Park and get the Piccadilly Line than risk Kings Cross 010
Matthew Perren @matthewperren.bsky.social · 07/10/2026Is fantasy football where they are all naked or is that just me? 000
Matthew Perren @matthewperren.bsky.social · 07/10/2026He can smile all he likes but I still hide behind the sofa when he comes on telly 000
Reposted by Matthew PerrenSteve Mullis @stevemullis.net · 05/10/2026[car dealership waiting room] Me: [chanting] knobs, knobs- Other car buyers: knobs, KNOBS Car salesman: [pounding desk] KNOBS, KNOBS, KNOBS!forbes.comKnobs Returning To Some Automakers’ Vehicles, To The Relief Of ManyAuto companies are listening to the complaints of consumers, who want their knobs and buttons back. 21691861686
Matthew Perren @matthewperren.bsky.social · 06/10/2026This whole thing is a triumph of single-step-thinking. It’s a blight on current discourse. Tables have four legs. So do cows. Cows are therefore tables. 0110
Matthew Perren @matthewperren.bsky.social · 06/10/2026Archer was a cunt and that’s all that needs to be said. 110
Matthew Perren @matthewperren.bsky.social · 06/10/2026Andrew is 100% correct and it’s all the fault of whomever it was who invented Poetry Voice with its weird breathy emphasis and odd. pauses. in. weird. places. 010
Matthew Perren @matthewperren.bsky.social · 06/10/2026Jeffrey Archer is dead and we are eating fewer peas. It truly is end-of-times stuff. 020
Matthew Perren @matthewperren.bsky.social · 05/10/2026Oh…believed to have been created as a tomb. So that’s ok then. 050
Matthew Perren @matthewperren.bsky.social · 05/10/2026Should we accept bad things happening to Sam Altman? 030
Matthew Perren @matthewperren.bsky.social · 04/10/2026Good morning from the last person in Britain not performing their phone calls as outdoor theatre. 130
Matthew Perren @matthewperren.bsky.social · 03/10/2026His relationship is so great that he needs to publish everything about his life on social media so strangers can validate him What an arse 051
Matthew Perren @matthewperren.bsky.social · 03/10/2026Can we just not please? Let’s use grown up words this time, eh? 000
Matthew Perren @matthewperren.bsky.social · 02/10/2026I hate both of them. I hope they get married 000
Matthew Perren @matthewperren.bsky.social · 02/10/2026static.klipy.comFunny Hospital Explanation from Airplane!Alt: Funny Hospital Explanation from Airplane! 000
Matthew Perren @matthewperren.bsky.social · 02/10/2026Oh. Sorry. “Fight the urge” I never fight that urge 000