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Mark A. Rayner

@markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy
200 followers 1 following 404 posts

Human-shaped, monkey-loving, robot-fighting, pirate-hearted, storytelling junkie, Mark is an award-winning author of satire and science fiction. (alt texts: avatar […] [bridged from mas.to/@markarayner on the fediverse by fed.brid.gy ]

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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 16h
No, that's just the disembodied skull bebop you're hearing. #scoobydoo #daphne #fred #humor #humour #spooky
Daphne and Fred from the scooby doo gang, looking worried while a skull plays the trumpet in the background with the caption: There's something mighty spooking going on around here.
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 01/10/2026
"Is Canadian conspiracy." #rocky #bullwinkle #cartoons #humor #humour
boris and natasha from rocky and bullwinkle show saying to trump:
"Tell them is fake news, work of moose and squirrel."
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 30/09/2026
It's not an oxymoron, it's a superposition! #dickens #quantum #humor #humour #schrodinger
Dickens: It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.
Schrodinger: Nice
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 29/09/2026
Spooky season is almost here. #soon #skeleton #october #humor #humour
giant skeleton holding up a sign that says "soon"
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 28/09/2026
Wow, that guy really wanted that last parking space. #monday #mondaymotivation #humor #humour
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 27/09/2026
Are you crying? There's no crying in *checks notes* in the Zipper! markarayner.com/the-zipper #carnies #rides #humor #humour
sign that says: rid will only be stopped by an emergency (crying is not an emergency)
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 26/09/2026
Yet another confusing #caturday for this kitten that thinks it's a duck. #cat #cats #catsofmastodon #humor #humour [video description: a little black kitten meowing in a store, sounding more like a duck than a cat]
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 25/09/2026
Do you get fries with that? Or is that more of a mashed potatoes dish? #dystopia #weird #signs #humor #humour
restaurant sign that says:
Today's specials
crushing dystopian sadness 2.55
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 24/09/2026
"Wacky with a sustaining thread of raw existential angst. .. Mark A. Rayner juggles it all in his black humor, satirical multiverse romp layered over the big questions of identify, meaning and what matters when everything is jumbled up." –Lynda Williams, author of the […] [Original post on mas.to]
5 star-review
Wacky with a sustaining thread of raw existential angst.

Ever been troubled by the mess a multiverse would make of your identity, life, and the meaning of a special night together in a tent? Or wondered what different versions of you might have in common. Or not.

Mark A. Rayner juggles it all in his black humor, satirical multiverse romp layered over the big questions of identify, meaning and what matters when everything is jumbled up.

A fun read that's occasionally poignant in a nippy way. cover art for alpha max by mark a. rayner
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 24/09/2026
Just kittens? Surely, puppies too? And what about baby otters? #cat #cats #kittens #humor #humour #catsofmastodon
sign that says: nuclear war is bad for kittens with a picture of a kitten reaching a paw upwards
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 23/09/2026
Yeah, yeah. The time knife. We've all seen it. [video description: Eckhart Tolle discussing how the future does not exist over pretty images of sunsets, etc ... ] #thegoodplace #eckharttolle #time #existentialism #humor #humour
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 22/09/2026
This setup really puts the "loo" in ballooning. #prollyAI #balloon #loom #humor #humour
balloon basket with a toilet inside and a roll of toilet paper on the outside.
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 21/09/2026
Same here vending machine. You got this. #monday #mondayvibe #humor #humour #darkhumor
food vending machine that has a sign on it that says: the light inside is broken but i still work
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 20/09/2026
Sunny Day Sweepin' the tanks away Looking for cookies to eat Can you tell me how to get, How to get to Ka-i-ju Street #cookiemonster #grover #thatTail #kaiju #godzilla #humor #humour
toy that looks like gozilla's body, but with cookie monster's head, and grover's face on the tail -- all blue, not green
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 19/09/2026
It's another brotherly #caturday! #cat #cats #catsofmastodon #humor #humour
a grey cat squishing an orange cat inside a shoebox
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 18/09/2026
Very weird dogs have a cute case of the zoomies! #Iknowtheyarebovines #bovines #cattle #dog #dogs #humor #humour
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 17/09/2026
Uh, guys, I know you're operating out of a former fast food joint, but typography still matters. #Taintstore #TaintGoodDesign #humor #humour
a former pizza hut repurposed into a paint store with a sign that reads "Taint" store
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 03/09/2026
Some days you just need to say "fuck it" and go for a walk in the rain with an ungulate. #deer #Ithink #antlers #ungulate #humor #humour
a young man with a blue umbrella standing on a busy sidewalk in the rain with a deer with antlers
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 15/09/2026
Today's Pirate Ontology is all about dark humor and why we need it. (Especially these days, but I'd argue humans require it always.) It's an essay you can check it out on my website directly: markarayner.com/what-is-dark-comedy… […] [Original post on mas.to]
a gallows with two hanging nooses, with the sun shining brightly from behind
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 15/09/2026
I'm not sure what's happening here, but this lady's milliner is certifiable. #sillyHat #verySillyHat #namethatmovie #humor #humour
a woman holding a golden ax wearing an extremely silly hat
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 14/09/2026
If you like to review books, are a librarian, a bookseller, or in the book trades generally, you can get an advanced reading copy of Beta Max, the second novel in the Tundraverse series. It's chock-full of Maximilian Tundras, this time featuring a few dinosaurs and […] [Original post on mas.to]
cover art for beta max by mark a. rayner
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 14/09/2026
The irony police have been alerted. #robot #sweeping #humor #humour
a woman sweeping the floor of a robotic vacuum shop
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 13/09/2026
When the company is finally fed up with the ballet master's perfectionism. #ballet #master #rifles #humor #humour
ballerinas holding rifles in a black and white picture, probably rehearsing the nutcracker
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 12/09/2026
If my brother is doing it then I'm doing it too
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 12/09/2026
Just hanging out on another super-normal #caturday! #cat #cats #catsofmastodon #catstodon #humor #humour
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 11/09/2026
Robot existentialism. (Art by Eric Joyner.) #robot #robots #existentialism #theThinker #humor #humour
an old-fashioned robot sitting on a plinth like rodin's thinker -painting by Eric Joyner
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 11/09/2026
Some fabulous writing by Tom Junod about the Falling Man and 9/11: www.esquire.com/news-politics/a4803… #911anniversary #fallingman
esquire.com
The Falling Man
Do you remember this photograph? In the United States, people have taken pains to banish it from the record of September 11, 2001. The story behind it, though, and the search for the man pictured in it, are our most intimate connection to the horror of that day.
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 11/09/2026
Robot existentialism. (Art by Eric Joyner.) #robot #robots #existentialism #theThinker #humor #humour
an old-fashioned robot sitting on a plinth like rodin's thinker -painting by Eric Joyner
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 10/09/2026
The cosmic ballet goes on. #gull #sheep #apotheosis #humor #humour
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 11/08/2026
Sharing this insightful review by Shannon Pilcher of The Gates of Polished Horn in full. "Intelligent, original, and consistently entertaining, Mark A. Rayner's collection will resonate with readers who appreciate literary fiction infused with speculative imagination […] [Original post on mas.to]
Goodreads review by Shannon Pilcher, august 3, 2026:
5 stars
The Gates of Polished Horn: A Collection of Stories is an imaginative and thought-provoking collection that effortlessly blends literary fiction, speculative fiction, satire, and philosophical inquiry. Mark A. Rayner demonstrates remarkable versatility, crafting stories that entertain while inviting readers to question the nature of reality, morality, and human consciousness.

What immediately stood out to me was Rayner's ability to balance intellectual depth with wit and accessibility. Whether exploring artificial consciousness, time travel, existential identity, or the fragile line between truth and illusion, each story presents provocative ideas without sacrificing compelling characters or engaging storytelling. The collection consistently surprises while remaining emotionally grounded.

I was particularly impressed by the recurring exploration of perception and reality. Inspired by Homer's metaphor of the Gates of Polished Horn, the stories ask readers how they respond when confronted with unsettling truths. Rather than providing definitive answers, Rayner encourages reflection through humor, irony, and inventive speculative scenarios that linger long after each story concludes.

Ultimately, The Gates of Polished Horn is more than a collection of short fiction, it is a celebration of curiosity, imagination, and the enduring power of storytelling to challenge the way we see ourselves and the world around us. Intecover art of the gates of polished horn a collection of stories by mark. a. rayner
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 09/09/2026
When your goblin enjoys your beverage more than you. #cat #cats #catsofmastodon #catstodon #humor #humour
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 08/09/2026
It's the fall, so that means a-woo school starts again. #husky #awoo #dog #dogs #dogsofmastodon #dogstodon #humor #humour
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 07/09/2026
It's hard to stay hydrated when you're really confused. #FartFreeWater #humor #humour #badDesign #weird #signs
a badly designed sign that says free water twice, but reads more like w - fart -free-water
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 06/09/2026
Weird dog, making its own Jacuzzi . #IknowitsABear #dog #dogs #bear #humor #humour [description: a black bear frothing up a large tub of water like its a jacuzzi.]
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 05/09/2026
Wow, this is a really judgy #caturday. #surveillance #cat #cats #catsofmastodon #humor #humour
an orange cat looking extremely suspicious as it stares from behind a surveillance camera
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 04/09/2026
A modern-age Tantalus. #balls #roof #childhood #tantalize #humor #humour
a boy looks longingly at a roof filled with rubber and soccer balls
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 03/09/2026
Some days you just need to say "fuck it" and go for a walk in the rain with an ungulate. #deer #Ithink #antlers #ungulate #humor #humour
a young man with a blue umbrella standing on a busy sidewalk in the rain with a deer with antlers
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 03/09/2026
ICYMI, here are my (initial) thoughts on the retro-futuristic tyranny of the unitard: markarayner.beehiiv.com/p/the-retro… #humor #humour #sf #sciencfiction #onsie #unitard #jumpsuit #flightsuit
markarayner.beehiiv.com
The retro-futuristic tyranny of the unitard
Why were 70s predictions of the future so obsessed with jumpsuits, onesies and unitard-like uniforms?
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 02/09/2026
Brushing your teeth with this is exhausting. #thedude #thebiglebowski #probablyAI #sorry #humor #humour
a black and white image of an open and sqeezed tube of nihilish toothpaste - no flavor - no color -nothing, along with a toothbrush. possibly (probably) and AI image
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 01/09/2026
If you haven't signed up for my newsletter yet, this is the kind of thing you risk missing: The retro-futuristic tyranny of the unitard markarayner.beehiiv.com/p/the-retro… #sciencefiction #SF ##humor #humour #newsletters
women dressed in red unitards with gold/silver helmets and epaulets, holding whips -- image from space 1999
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 01/09/2026
September! The spooky season is on its way! #elvira #pumpkins #pumpkinspicy #humor #humour
Elvira mistress of the night walking with two enormous pumpkins held in front of her
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 31/08/2026
This book seemed extremely far-fetched when I started writing it. Even in the age of ozempic, it still has lots to say. The Fatness - a novel of epic portions - www.goodreads.com/book/show/3612181… #satire #humor #humour #comedy #darkhumor #SFF #book #books #bookstodon
Cover art for the fatness a novel of epic portions by mark a. rayner
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 31/08/2026
Every Monday morning. #coffee #morning #monday #mondayvibe #humor #humour
a cartoon by bannerman of a pot of coffee surrounded by figures worshiping it
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 30/08/2026
In defiance of all the secret societies, I'm posting the schematics of the first RoboPope. #sundayfunday #robopope #robots #silly #humor #humour
Futuristic cyborg pope schematic with left half showing exposed mechanical internals and labeled tech parts (motors, sensors, battery, digestion organ pot, gun holder, ground sensors, retractable needle) and right half armored, holding a multi‑phasic Satan‑busting crosier with a stabby bit.
Oh, and he also has an all-in-one wireless pope hat
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 29/08/2026
It's Ichabod #Caturday! #cat #cats #catstodon #catsofmastodon #humor #humour
Grey cat's startled face peeks over a wicker basket rim while a calico's body is hunched into the basket, creating a humorous cramped-fit scene that makes it appear as though one cat's head is in the basket.
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 28/08/2026
Free on Kindle! Dr. Maximilian Tundra and his breakfast are the only thing standing between humanity and the collapse of civilization. A Milkshake Apocalypse -- a short story from the Tundraverse mybook.to/Milkshake A silly and easy way to Skip into the […] [Original post on mas.to]
Cover art for A Milkshake Apocalypse - a short story from the tundraverse - by Mark A. Rayner
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 28/08/2026
The father of science fiction was a serious nutcase. #sf #sciencefiction #thiswasreal #hugoGernsback #humor #humour
The Isolator by Hugo Gernsback Member American Physical Society 

Author wearing a bulbous helmet with eye ports and a front tube hooked to a pressure canister, seated at a cluttered desk writing — a staged demonstration of "The Isolator" noise‑eliminating study hood.
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 21/08/2026
In all fairness, there should be a sign or something. #dog #dogs #dogsofmastodon #humor #humour
tweet by 1997 ford fiesta @skoookum
he didn't know you're not supposed to lick the uber driver's elbow

picture of dog with ears back, looking upset
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 27/08/2026
Free on Kindle! Dr. Maximilian Tundra and his breakfast are the only thing standing between humanity and the collapse of civilization. A Milkshake Apocalypse -- a short story from the Tundraverse mybook.to/Milkshake A silly and easy way to Skip into the […] [Original post on mas.to]
Cover art for A Milkshake Apocalypse - a short story from the tundraverse - by Mark A. Rayner
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Mark A. Rayner @markarayner.mas.to.ap.brid.gy · 23/08/2026
The goblin requests more sustenance. #cat #cats #catsofmastodon #food #humor #humour
a little white cat covered with food residue with an empty plate and crumbs beside it
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