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alyssa 😬

@lyssaz.bsky.social
300 followers 203 following 486 posts

Weird blend of reverence & irreverence, but still trying to live an undivided life, even if it means I'm stretched wide in the process. Into Jesus, justice, prayer, & laughter. Ennea 5w4. From the land of WCT on the 🐦 app.

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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 17/09/2025
It honestly isn’t fair that I can’t just take all my ear innards out, soak them in a warm vinegar, Dawn, and water solution, scrub them with baking soda on a toothbrush, rinse them off, and then put them back in place again.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 21/08/2025
My therapist’s therapist is named Skip, and I don’t like that at all. That is a sitcom name. I’m supposed to tell my trauma to someone who goes to Skip for support? C’mon.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 07/08/2025
I’m tired of doom and memes about doom. What have you been learning about God recently?
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 26/07/2025
Texting with a friend.
Texts from me that say “they had a really good selection of balsamic vinegars at their house. Conservatives shouldn’t be allowed to have good balsamic vinegar.” A response that says “no they deserve distilled white vinegar only. Good balsamic is for us” and then me saying “amen”
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 09/07/2025
You know what makes me angry? I’ll tell you: When you login to your insurance webpage & try to find a new provider & it asks you to select which insurance plan you have. EXCUSE ME? I just made an account where I had to give you my member ID & now you’re pretending not to know my plan type?
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 01/07/2025
Thanks to everyone who encouraged me in this. I did it! Two friends and I memorized Psalm 19. We had lunch to recite it to each other and celebrate yesterday! I’m shocked to say it was easier than I expected, despite my lil brain lesion, and I love that those words are within me now.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 29/06/2025
“The mountain is out today!” “Wow the mountain is gorgeous today.” “Look at the mountain!” - conversation during every day with a cloud break in the Pacific Northwest
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 24/06/2025
I need a tutorial on how to keep a chair in your room without it always being covered in clothes. This is a deep mystery that I’m surprised the science community hasn’t spent more time investigating.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 16/06/2025
Just ran into my therapist while walking down the street. Bless her. Running into a client on Father’s Day has got to be the stuff of a therapist’s nightmares.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 14/06/2025
I want to grow up to be one of the little old ladies out there protesting. Give me an oxygen tank, a cane, a heart for justice, and a hope and imagination for a better tomorrow.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 08/06/2025
Two years ago I was housesitting for my pastor and his fam and I hid 100 tiny pictures of myself in common areas of their house. Now I still continue to get random texts like this. Highly recommend.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 01/06/2025
I know it is grainy, but I just passed these two owls while I was on a walk 🥹 followed them from tree to tree for maybe thirty minutes. So incredible. Great horned owls, I think? I forced every passerby to look at them, too.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 27/05/2025
Finally watched Severance and felt like I was sitting at a brutal IFS boardroom session.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
I can’t believe we lost people to Threads. It’s awful over there.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
What are we all having for dinner tonight?
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 23/05/2025
THIS is the ideal style for earbuds, but it is nearly impossible to find high quality ones in this format. I don’t want $200 earbuds that I’ll lose in my pocket in ten minutes. I want to be able to lay them around my neck and take them on and off quickly for conversations w/out fear.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 23/05/2025
My mother’s parents and father’s parents had all passed before my 14th birthday, so now as an adult 20+ years later, I’m absolutely shocked every time my friends lose their grandparents. How the heck do you still have those?? I thought those were a special childhood treat!
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 22/05/2025
When it’s May and you’ve already reached the catastrophic coverage level of your insurance for the year, so your prescriptions are free
media.tenor.com
a woman in a black jacket is asking the question " yay "
ALT: a woman in a black jacket is asking the question " yay "
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 22/05/2025
Some days I feel poor but then I remember how my depression era grandma always bought us the Thick Nalley’s chili so she could water it down and make it last longer And she absolutely reveled in treating herself by going out to eat once a month. …to Burger King. For a single Whopper Jr, with water.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 21/05/2025
When you’re the prayer deacon and you’ve gotta schedule people to be available for intercession at the end of the service.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 20/05/2025
What are your favorite mindless, migraine-friendly hobbies? Particularly if you aren’t good at art stuff.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 18/05/2025
Can we all agree together that absolutely nobody wants to guess our age? Please stop asking people to guess your age. I also don’t want to guess how much you spent snagging that amazing thrift find. Pls stop making me guess things. It makes us both feel awful.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 17/05/2025
Had one of the worst hospital experiences of my life this week. And I’ve had a lot of hospital experiences. I’ve made every effort to protect myself from this treatment, but it wasn’t enough. My condition is documented in my med charts, explained in my wallet…
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 17/05/2025
I love the Pacific Northwest, because it’s 59°F right now and I just opened up my door to let the breeze in.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 07/05/2025
I NEVER get to have a lock in overnighter with all my bros at the Sistine Chapel 😞 Feeling jealous. I bet they’re gonna play sardines. #conclave
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 06/05/2025
Therapy is just desperately protracted custody court between myself and myself, and my therapist is the mediator. Hopefully I win 😭
Tweet from @daveybad saying “get full custody of your inner child”
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 28/04/2025
If someone was going to memorize one full chapter of Scripture, what chapter would you recommend? The hope for it being general spiritual formation, friendship with God, non-anxious presence, grounding truth to preach/repeat/pray over one’s self, etc.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 25/04/2025
Trying to convince my therapist to get a felt board/flannel graph to use for sharing her therapeutic tools and analogies.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 24/04/2025
There are SO MANY vile and horrendous things that need to be mentioned in the history books as they are written. But I hope the history books also take at least a couple sentences to mention Four Seasons Total Landscaping.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 23/04/2025
If you had told me as a kid that one day we’d all be able to buy a 50+inch tv that connects to the internet and can play pretty much anything at any time and you could buy it online with two clicks for a couple hundred dollars and also it only weights 30 lbs I would have laughed in your face.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 21/04/2025
Alas, I am relearning that just because Christ is risen from the dead does not mean I don’t still need to get on Planning Center and schedule volunteers for the next several weeks 🫣 oops.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 21/04/2025
I’ve heard the “John outran Peter” joke about 5000000 times now, but I know pastors still have to include it because it seems to get the same uproar of laughter from the congregation every single time.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 19/04/2025
Nothing can ruin a warm spring day quite like the sound of a neighbor using a leaf blower for hours on end.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 18/04/2025
Shout out to pastors who are out there trying to write for a Good Friday service and for an Easter service at the same time. That Easter Joy is real hard to come by when you’re in a dark room surrounded with candles and images of an ancient torture and death device.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 17/04/2025
El Salvador means “The Savior” and I can’t shake the thought that that’s where Jesus would be if this was the time in which he took on flesh. Violently taken, humiliated, stripped, and placed in modern day concentration camps, convicted of nothing but making the government uncomfortable.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 16/04/2025
I am not economically or politically savvy. I abhor trump and his cruelty and his policies. That is an important disclaimer. But I do have a tariff question that I feel afraid to ask. I’m asking it anyway. It feels like all of us who are against tariffs because “companies will just raise prices…
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 15/04/2025
I think about suburban sprawl a whole lot more than I thought I would when I was young. I thought I would think about suburban sprawl zero times.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 15/04/2025
Friendly reminder as you walk through Holy Week that this week is not mostly about times you denied God or ways you’ve been greedy, etc., etc., etc. Rather, it is about the extravagant love of the God-man Jesus who who went lower than low, beyond the depths of hell, to heal humanity through love.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 12/04/2025
Just went down a very brief spiral about how tariffs could impact prescriptions and I deserve all the treats in the world for making myself close that internet tab and stop.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 12/04/2025
The fact that Cory Booker wore the Hoka Clifton 9 shoes for that incredible feat on the senate floor is honestly the best advertisement for a pair of shoes I could imagine… Which is why I’m incredibly disappointed that I find them so desperately ugly.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 11/04/2025
We continue to sing the praises of a God we’d condemn to hell if given half the chance. Lucky for us, he’s already been there, and he unlocked the doors.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 10/04/2025
Trying to up my fiber intake to help keep my blood sugar more stable, which I guess means that I just permanently have chia seeds and broccoli stuck in my teeth now.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 10/04/2025
If I have to open one more google doc I will break.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 10/04/2025
At the point in Easter prep where I just absentmindedly looked up my own phone number in Planning Center.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 08/04/2025
Pickled red onions are so easy to make, and they make almost every meal better. When I made them this week I started a second jar and put half a bag of frozen corn in the same vinegar mixture… 10/10 highly recommend. So good on tacos, salads, in soups, on sandwiches, pretty much everything.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 05/04/2025
What are your favorite poems for the days and stories of Holy Week?
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 05/04/2025
Being in ministry just before Easter.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 05/04/2025
A lot of people say, “if you know, you know,” but as it turns out, I usually do not know.
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 02/04/2025
When people say they want to make America great again, I always assume they mean they want to go back to the age of Crest Whitening Expressions Vanilla Mint Toothpaste. It’s so disappointing every time when I realize they actually just want to go back to more racism and misogyny again 😞
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alyssa 😬 @lyssaz.bsky.social · 02/04/2025
While I was standing at a bus stop last week…
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