iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 14h

Ummm who is the sponsor on the jersey? I don’t like this for him.

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CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 20h

Had an eye exam yesterday and was told in this order I have a high cup to disc ratio <winning> which can be a precursor to glaucoma <crashing out> but my intraocular pressure was normal so I’m “at less risk for glaucoma” <winning or …?>. I went in for new glasses but I got a roller coaster ride.

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CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 09/10/2026

Our son has moved out for college but it was awesome at the end of his hs years when he’d be like “<Name redacted> came to my work. Do we like her or is she a weiner” and we’d both be on the same hating page like WEINER or non-hating page with Nah she’s cool.

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CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 08/10/2026

I’m told that sparkly gel pens summon evil less often than blood-red fountain pens.

CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

If you only have one day in Frisco, do like those busy busy Silicon Valley technologists do and snort the dry seasoning pack.

CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 06/10/2026

Two cats. One is flat. You cropped out the other cat and we only see the fat oops I mean flat one.

CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 06/10/2026

Is my freakum dress also tactical is something men do not have to worry about when they dress up.

CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 04/10/2026

Ah yes the Glomar response. I hope a good time was allegedly had by all undisclosed sources.

CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 03/10/2026

After sexual assault, each party just has to say do over no take backs and then pinky swear and then it’s like nothing happened no court would convict

CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 03/10/2026

Our cat Stingray aka Stingy (rhymes with dinghy) Boy’s song is to the tune of Frank Sinatra’s “It Was A Very Good Year.” Stingy Boy is a very stingy boy A very stingy boy The stingiest boy who ever stung And if you saw him sting On soft summer nights That’s as far as I’ve gotten on the lyrics.

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CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 03/10/2026

We call that the “love me paws”.

CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

He’s like “How did you even gEt hEeeeRe?!”

CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

This is the fridge of someone who is relating to you as a human being.

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CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

Muscular Christianity and the hot topics are decoding this year’s Starbucks holiday cups and why the Pope is wrong, very bad, and no good.

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CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

Mine ends with booboo beebee booboo (pause). Boo. Boo. And yes the final two boos do sound sad.

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CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

Whomst among us has not been a Bumgas?

I did the exact same thing and I had just come back from a road trip to an Italian deli that sells their frozen lasagnas, sauces, pastas, soups etc. and stocked that freezer with our haul. Idk what lesson I was supposed to learn from this one.

Please respect Zoosha’s need for privacy during this difficult time.

Trying to remember if he turned off the stove before he left the house.

I can’t unsee it now. The muzzle-ish looking part of his face and the tiny eyes! Long neck too.

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After we watched the Temple Grandin movie, I told my husband he needed to get the blueprints for the squeeze machine that Temple built for her dorm room. There are some days he needs my weighted blanket (aka Warren Weighty) AND me to lay on him when he gets home.

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Time for my annual McSweeney’s rabbit hole. I always end up at that essay about alternate names for Ruth’s Chris Steak House and I usually read it all the way through.

CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

Rated R for disturbing images, brief dongzilla, gussy THROUGHOUTTTT

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CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

I feel like my sleeves get slimy and wet when you fuck things up every single time. Did I do it right?

CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 21/09/2026

Sautéed kimchi is so good and it develops a faintly buttery taste when you sauté it. It was right there and she missed it.

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CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 18/09/2026

My kid is a college freshman & I told him this is a magical time when most of your friends/hangouts are within walking distance and to treasure those group strolls to Trader Joe’s to get yogurt. After college, it’s cars & alienation.

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CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

Can this guy run for Senate in Maine?

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CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

Step 1) pin dad down Step 2) be very heavy Step 3) profit

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CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

I went to one in East Palo Alto that had at least two drug deals go down a few yards away from face painting and a booth that specialized in fermented foods and kombucha. Only in EPA.

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CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

I’m torn. Shailene was engaged to a vaccine skeptic NFL player who has publicly stated the government created HIV/AIDS & who has coyly hinted that 9/11 didn’t happen. But she told him she wanted to fuck another guy before the wedding, so they didn’t get married. Problematic fave/queen/MAHA?!?!

CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 11/09/2026

Reminds me of the time a friend complained about being fired for falling asleep at Important Meeting C & he was pouting because “I fell asleep at Important Meetings A & B, but not C!”

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CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 11/09/2026

I’m only interested if Dean Cain or James Woods endorses this machine, your research is all done with the first Google AI result, and it uses petroleum, not any renewable energy source.

CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 10/09/2026

Cat 1 when we go on vacation: my in-laws can’t find him until I tell them to look *inside* the recliner, where he doesn’t go any other time. His end of the world bunker Cat 2: several pics of him soliciting belly rubs or video of him making biscuits on Grandma Adonis seems to be a Cat 2.

There was a Father’s Day weekend when my husband ate 6 hot dogs in one weekend at a few cookouts. That Sunday evening, he had a headache and he had to move his wedding ring to his pinky finger due to swelling. We stopped eating them after that. Sorry for skewing the stats, America!

Jiggly bellies are way better for cuddling.

I’m not saying I *never* used my foot to jiggle my baby bouncer. However I didn’t push my baby as far away from me as possible while twisting most of my body away from him, while trying to be Kaa in the Jungle Book hypnotizing my next meal.

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Ah yes, CDN YB4 CME which is open 27/5 in the Big Fruit That Always Is Alert.

Screenshot of garbled letters that appears to read CDNYB4CME275

CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 08/09/2026

Hope you didn’t eat it. That’s how RFK is doing recall notices now, by telekinetically messaging individual consumers.

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My trauma response is jumping out of my skin when my son or husband walk into a room when my back is turned. Then apologizing even though they tell me I don’t need to. Not lying to an advisory board I formed, venture capitalists, CVS, Walgreen’s, and my hundreds of employees for 15 years. And CMS.

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CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 07/09/2026

The beauty routine abides.

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CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 07/09/2026

He guesses he’ll just die now.

CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 05/09/2026

Any man who calls women females should be duct taped to a chair.

CB Raider @lpsoto.bsky.social · 04/09/2026

Once you see it, you can’t balloon knot see it.