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Loving BDSM

@lovingbdsm.bsky.social

279 followers 12 following 152 posts

We help kinksters have happy, healthy power exchange relationships by focusing on the reality of what being in a D/s dynamic can look like. Hosted by John Brownstone (he/him) and Kayla Lords (she/her) Find everything here: linktr.ee/lovingbdsm

Posts Replies Media

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

Grab the Kink Bundle before it’s gone - TONIGHT at 11:59pm PT! 💜 30+ trainings, courses, ebooks, and memberships 💜 Over $2,000 in value 💜 You get it at a 95% discount Learn more and sign up here: bit.ly/kinkbundle2026

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Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 21/09/2026

The Kink Bundle is all you'll need to fully explore BDSM, kink, and the Dom/sub lifestyle. Learn more and sign up here: bit.ly/kinkbundle2026

Kink Bundle | Purchase The Kink Bundle - Dom Sub Living

Visit Dom Sub Living to purchase our Kink BDSM Bundle. Our Kink BDSM Bundle package offers everything you need to fully explore BDSM, kink, and the Dom/sub lifestyle. Purchase our Kink BDSM pack…

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Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

Learning about the kink lifestyle can be so overwhelming. But we're here to help you take your power exchange to the next level. Learn more and sign up here: bit.ly/kinkbundle2026

Kink Bundle | Purchase The Kink Bundle - Dom Sub Living

Visit Dom Sub Living to purchase our Kink BDSM Bundle. Our Kink BDSM Bundle package offers everything you need to fully explore BDSM, kink, and the Dom/sub lifestyle. Purchase our Kink BDSM pack…

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Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 12/07/2026

📢 Free BDSM bootcamp starts tomorrow! 📢 ✨ What if this is your time to master your Dom/sub dynamic and achieve a fulfilling BDSM lifestyle? ✨ Just a few steps away from confidence and balance! ✨ Join Dom Sub Living’s FREE 4-Day Bootcamp! Starts tomorrow, July 13! buff.ly/tZgw4u6

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 07/07/2026

Want to master your Dom/sub dynamic in the next few weeks? The time is NOW! ⏰ Mastering it can be a game-changer. Join Dom Sub Living’s FREE Jumpstart Your BDSM Journey Bootcamp! Starts July 13. buff.ly/tZgw4u6

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 02/07/2026

"I don't know if I can balance BDSM with my daily life." We’ve all thought that too, but you can still have a thriving Dom/sub relationship. Join Dom Sub Living’s FREE 4-Day Bootcamp and start your journey! Starts July 13! buff.ly/tZgw4u6

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Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 17/06/2026

It's Wednesday, June 17 and we're going live at 8pm ET. This week's topic comes straight from my (Kayla's) doom scrolling and will be a winding, chaotic conversation on the evolution of kink terms, labels, etc. youtube.com/live/gnXMYAS...

Kinky Language Changes (for better or worse)

YouTube video by Loving BDSM

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Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 10/06/2026

It's Wednesday, June 10 and we're going live at 8pm ET. We have no idea what the topic will be and it might end up being an extended bonus section. youtube.com/live/K_xRUoo... If you can't watch live, the video playback will be available, and the audio podcast will be out on Friday.

Loving BDSM podcast live stream

YouTube video by Loving BDSM

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Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 03/06/2026

It's Wednesday, June 3, and we're going live tonight at 8pm ET! This week's episode is a kinky Q&A. We asked for questions on Fetlife, IG, and YouTube. youtube.com/live/Z_W54FY... If you can't watch live, the video playback will be available, and the audio podcast will be out on Friday.

YouTube video by Loving BDSM

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 27/05/2026

It's Wednesday, May 27 and we're going live at 8pm ET! This week's episode is a BDSM Reddit response. youtube.com/live/339ARXG... If you can't watch live, the video playback will be available, and the audio podcast will be out on Friday.

BDSM Reddit Response

YouTube video by Loving BDSM

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Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 20/05/2026

It's Wednesday, May 20, and we're going live at 8pm ET! This week, we're finishing up our series on conflict in D/s by talking about what to do after you're no longer upset with each other. youtube.com/live/-Fi1f6L...

Lessons Learned and What to Do After Conflict | Dealing with conflict in D/s series

YouTube video by Loving BDSM

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 06/05/2026

It's Wednesday, May 6 and we're going live at our summer stream time: 8:00pm ET! This week, we're continuing our series on conflict in power exchange by talking about what comes next when conflict happens. youtube.com/live/MoQ4IHA...

What to Do When Conflict Happens (because it will) | Dealing with conflict in D/s series

YouTube video by Loving BDSM

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Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 29/04/2026

It's Wednesday, April 29 and we're going live at 3pm ET. This week, we're starting our new series on dealing with conflict in D/s by talking about what can cause conflict in your power exchange. youtube.com/live/Scu21Dq...

What Causes Conflict in D/s | Dealing with conflict in D/s

YouTube video by Loving BDSM

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Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 22/04/2026

It's Wednesday, April 22, and we're going live at 3pm ET. This week, we're talking about the fact that sometimes a Dom says no or doesn't give a submissive what they want when they want it. youtube.com/live/5njZnpq...

When a Dom Says No

YouTube video by Loving BDSM

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Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 15/04/2026

We're going live at 3pm ET today, Wednesday, April 15. This week, we're sharing some of our own kinky peeves and reacting to some that were shared with us. youtube.com/live/gX_y5xV... If you can't watch live, the video playback will be available and the audio podcast will be out on Friday.

Kinky Pet Peeves | Sharing ours and reacting to your pet peeves

YouTube video by Loving BDSM

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Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 08/04/2026

No live stream today. JB isn't feeling well.

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Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 01/04/2026

It's Wednesday, April 1, and we're going live at 3pm ET - because YouTube let us out of the corner! This week we're doing a BDSM Reddit episode because we could use a (possible) rant or two. youtube.com/live/QHdhWEc...

BDSM Reddit Response

YouTube video by Loving BDSM

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 25/03/2026

YouTube still has us in the corner so we can't live stream this week. 😫 We decided to take a break and not record a podcast episode at all this week. Allegedly, we'll be out of the corner by next week, and we'll get back to our regular schedule.

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 20/03/2026

Tonight was supposed to be our virtual munch live stream but YouTube put us in the corner (AGAIN) and hasn't responded to our appeal yet We've won this appeal in the past we're hopeful this is temporary but if not, we won't be able to stream for two weeks This has been me (Kayla) since it happened

media.tenor.com

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ALT: a close up of a cartoon character with a very angry face and a tie .

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 18/03/2026

It's Wednesday, March 18, and we're going live at 3pm ET! This week is me (Kayla) asking "Is spontaneity possible in a power exchange or any kinky relationship?" (The boring answer is "Yes, probably" but I'm interested in the convo more than the technical answer) youtube.com/live/xD52Jx8...

Can You Be Spontaneous in a Kink Relationship?

YouTube video by Loving BDSM

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Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 11/03/2026

It's Wednesday, March 11, and we're going live at 3pm ET This week's topic is on feeling disconnected in your power exchange and what to do about it. youtube.com/live/P3b5vX-... If you can't watch live, the video playback will be available, and the audio podcast will be out on Friday.

Feeling Disconnected in Power Exchange (and what to do about it)

YouTube video by Loving BDSM

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Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 04/03/2026

It's Wednesday, March 4 and we're going live at 3pm ET! This week's episode is a kinky Q&A. We asked for questions on IG and YouTube, and we might ask for questions during the live stream. youtube.com/live/GvGIaD9...

Kinky Q&A | Answering Questions from IG

YouTube video by Loving BDSM

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 25/02/2026

It's Wednesday, February 25, and we're going live at 3pm ET. This week, we're taking the opportunity to reconnect in our relationship, while working on our love maps, by answering random, silly, and/or lighthearted relationship questions we found on IG. youtube.com/live/01cvBo6...

Reconnecting and Building Our Love Maps by Answering Relationship Questions

YouTube video by Loving BDSM

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 18/02/2026

We're going live at 3pm ET today (Wednesday, February 18). This week's topic is on emotional intelligence, emotional regulation, and power exchange. If you can't watch live, the video playback will be available, and the audio podcast will be out on Friday. youtube.com/live/ZGG6yOC...

Emotional Intelligence, Emotional Regulation, and Power Exchange

YouTube video by Loving BDSM

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 11/02/2026

It's Wednesday, so we're going live starting at 3pm ET. No topic. We'll chat and take questions from YouTube live chat. youtube.com/live/TJ_i8oI... If you can't watch live, the video playback will be available, and the audio podcast will be out on Friday.

Chatting and Taking Questions from Live Chat

YouTube video by Loving BDSM

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 04/02/2026

It's Wednesday, and we're going live at 3pm ET. I know I (Kayla) could use a good rant, and I'd love to see if JB might get ranty, too - so let's do a BDSM Reddit episode. youtube.com/live/f-wRIl_...

BDSM Reddit Response

YouTube video by Loving BDSM

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 30/01/2026

In this week's episode, we talk about *gestures broadly at the world* and share resources and ideas for anyone who hates what's going on but feels overwhelmed by what to do. We also answer: Can you do D/s with someone when you don't agree with their politics? lovingbdsm.net/2026/01/30/k...

Let's Talk About *Gestures Broadly at the World* (Episode 470) • Loving BDSM

Consider this a political episode, but instead of going over headlines, we try to offer options for how to get involved (and more).

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 28/01/2026

We're going live at 3pm ET today Consider this our "political" episode but we're NOT debating politics. Instead we'll share resources/ways to get involved to help people affected by *gestures broadly at the world* & answer a question about D/s relationships & politics. youtube.com/live/MYes0Qj...

*Gestures Broadly at the World*

YouTube video by Loving BDSM

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 21/01/2026

It's Wednesday, January 21, and we're going live at 3pm ET. This week's topic is on the importance of friendship in long term D/s relationships. youtube.com/live/wDOwPiL... If you can't watch live, the video playback will be available, and the audio podcast will be out on Friday.

The Importance of Friendship in Long Term Power Exchange

YouTube video by Loving BDSM

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 14/01/2026

It's Wednesday - we're going live at 3pm ET! This week we're discussing a fear some new Doms have: that they might get carried away with big D dominance, either with their partner or outside of their relationship. youtube.com/live/M19azI9...

Self Control and Power in Dominance

YouTube video by Loving BDSM

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 09/01/2026

BDSM Reddit Response Happy New Year! We're back from our winter break and starting 2026 with a Reddit response episode! In this episode: Thanks to silentwinged for sending over most of these Reddit posts. Am I the only one who enjoys caregiving dominance more than sexual dominance? We tried BDSM…

BDSM Reddit Response

Happy New Year! We're back from our winter break and starting 2026 with a Reddit response episode! In this episode: Thanks to silentwinged for sending over most of these Reddit posts. Am I the only one who enjoys caregiving dominance more than sexual dominance? We tried BDSM for the first time, and my partner was sad afterwards. I feel disconnected from my submissive.

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 07/01/2026

We're back from our winter break and coming in strong with a BDSM Reddit response for our first episode of 2026! The stream starts at 3pm ET today (Wednesday) youtube.com/live/L6JwAmn... If you can't watch live, the video playback will be available and the audio podcast will be out on Friday.

BDSM Reddit Response

YouTube video by Loving BDSM

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 19/12/2025

It's the last episode of 2025, and we decided to keep it chaotic and weird, so we're answering 10 silly relationship questions and exposing each other's weirdness, lol.

Answering 10 Silly Relationship Questions

It's the last episode of 2025, so we're keeping it casual and chaotic with a bit of silliness. In this episode: This month's virtual munch live stream is this Friday, December 19 starting at 9:30pm ET! We’re taking two weeks off for the holidays. The last newsletter of 2025 will be emailed this Friday, and we have a couple of Patreon events over the weekend.

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 17/12/2025

It's the last podcast live stream of 2025, and we're keeping it silly and chaotic! The stream begins at 3pm ET. This week we're answering silly relationship questions we found on IG. youtube.com/live/5R0dRyy...

Answering 10 Silly Relationship Questions (that we found on IG)

YouTube video by Loving BDSM

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 12/12/2025

At the beginning of the year, we decided to focus on our power exchange and reconnect. This week, we're talking about what we did and learned, and where we go from here.

Our D/s Life in 2025

We made a goal to reconnect and become more intentional in our power exchange this year. Now that we're near the end of the year, let's talk about how it went! In this episode: The Kinkery is having a sale! Get free shipping when you spend $35 or more (US orders only). Our 2025 Links from the episode: Shop at The Kinkery…

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 10/12/2025

It's Wednesday, December 10 and we're going live at 3pm ET! This week, we're giving an update on the goals we set for our relationship this year, primarily our goal of reconnecting. youtube.com/live/CsLihnw...

Our Power Exchange in 2025 | An Update

YouTube video by Loving BDSM

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 05/12/2025

How to Achieve Your Kink Goals for 2026 This week, we're looking forward to 2026 to how to achieve some of the kink goals a lot of kinksters have (including us!). As always, you don't have to wait for an arbitrary date to work towards new goals. In this episode: We actually have a plan for the…

How to Achieve Your Kink Goals for 2026

This week, we're looking forward to 2026 to how to achieve some of the kink goals a lot of kinksters have (including us!). As always, you don't have to wait for an arbitrary date to work towards new goals. In this episode: We actually have a plan for the month of December before we take our two week break for Christmas and New Year’s…

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 03/12/2025

We're going live at 3pm ET today! This week, let's talk about how to actually achieve some of your kinky goals for next year - or whenever you're ready to work on them. youtube.com/live/qVF-l-L... The video playback will be available, and the audio podcast will be out on Friday.

Planning Your Kink Goals for 2026

YouTube video by Loving BDSM

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 26/11/2025

We're going live tonight at 8pm ET because we aren't doing a regular episode this week. We expect to be bleary-eyed and delirious which should make this interesting, lol. youtube.com/live/8U7ir6N...

Thanksgiving Eve stream

We're bleary-eyed and delirious, but we're here. Visit us at https://lovingbdsm.net Find all of the sites we recommend here: https://lovingbdsm.net/recommended-products/ BlueSky: https://bsky.app/pr...

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Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 24/11/2025

For this week only, we're not going to have a Monday Q&A episode or a Wednesday stream/Friday podcast episode. We WILL go live on Wednesday night at 8pm ET for a chaotic, Thanksgiving Eve stream. No topic, just vibes. Hope you can join us!

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 21/11/2025

You can thank YouTube and it's weirdness for the lack of topic this week, lol. Plus we share some of the thoughtful and helpful comments we received on previous podcast episodes.

Bonus Section Episode

Even though YouTube doesn't impact the podcast, what they do to our channel does impact our plans. That's why this week's episode is a bonus section episode, lol. In this episode: Join us for our virtual munch this Friday, November 21 at 9:30pm ET. YouTube grounded us but we’re back! Responses we’ve received to last week’s episode on soft BDSM …

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 19/11/2025

We're going live today, Wednesday, November 19 starting at 3pm ET. This week we'll go over some of the thoughtful responses shared from recent episodes while also making this a bonus section episode. youtube.com/live/AFI7GCL...

We're just happy to be here | A bonus section stream

YouTube video by Loving BDSM

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 14/11/2025

After trying to do some research on this term, I (Kayla) am left with a question: WTF is soft BDSM? It's definitely used by some kinksters but trying to piece together a clear, consistent definition and origin wasn't easy.

WTF is Soft BDSM?

Trying to figure out what "soft BDSM" even is took us on a journey. Let's talk about it. In this episode: Our Holiday Cricket tier - and holiday party sign up - ends on Saturday, November 15! Disclaimer: We don’t have to like a term for it to be valid for someone else Why does this even matter? Common understanding of terms…

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 12/11/2025

It's Wednesday, so yes, we're going live at 3pm ET. This week's topic is on the concept of soft BDSM. youtube.com/live/0AfyDcj... If you can't watch the live, the video playback will be available and the audio podcast will be out on Friday.

WTF is Soft BDSM??

YouTube video by Loving BDSM

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 07/11/2025

This week, we share our thoughts on soft kink shaming, play vs abuse, heartbreak and breakups, and more.

BDSM Reddit Response

This week, we're responding to situations shared on the kinky side of Reddit! In this episode: Join us through Patreon for a special holiday tier and get extra perks! Soft kink shaming Got dumped by my Dom who lied to me and his wife for three years The difference between intense play and abuse What is the "normal" amount of scenes to have in kink?

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 05/11/2025

It's Wednesday, and yes, of course, we're going live at 3pm ET. This week, we're responding to posts from the kinky side of Reddit. youtube.com/live/fRJfC1F... If you can't watch live, the video playback will be available, and the audio podcast will be out on Friday!

BDSM Reddit Response

YouTube video by Loving BDSM

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 31/10/2025

The term "love maps" used for non-kinky relationships, primarily marriages. We wondered if it could be applied to power exchange, too.

Love Maps and Power Exchange

The idea of love maps comes from the Gottman Institute in their studies on relationships, specifically marriage. We wondered if it could be applied to power exchange, too. In this episode: Join us through Patreon for a special holiday tier and get extra perks! This week's trans-affirming resource is QueerMed. Who developed the concept of a love map? Dr. Gottman from the Gottman Institute…

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Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 29/10/2025

It's Wednesday and we're going live at 3pm ET. This week we're talking about the concept of love maps and if/how they might work with power exchange. youtube.com/live/nf_0zth... If you can't watch live, the video playback will be available and the audio podcast comes out on Friday.

Love Maps and Power Exchange

YouTube video by Loving BDSM

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 24/10/2025

A kinkster asked for our take on D/s, domestic discipline, and trad wives. So we compare and contrast them in this week's episode.

Power Exchange vs Domestic Discipline vs Trad Wives

This week's episode is from a question a kinkster sent to us. They wanted to know our take on power exchange, domestic discipline, and trad wives. In this episode: It's the 5th Anniversary sale for the Kinkery! Join us for holidays on Patreon. Send in your questions for our Q&A episodes. This week's trans affirming resource is Trans Life Line.

Loving BDSM @lovingbdsm.bsky.social · 22/10/2025

It's Wednesday and we're going live at 3pm ET. This week's topic is from a question sent to us. A kinkster wanted to know our take on power exchange vs domestic discipline vs trad wives so that's what we're talking about. youtube.com/live/iuwnz_K...

Power Exchange vs Domestic Discipline vs Trad Wives

YouTube video by Loving BDSM