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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 1h

Alden's Laws: (1) Giving away baby clothes and furniture is the major cause of pregnancy. (2) Always be backlit. (3) Sit down whenever possible. [definitions/34]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 7h

Sic transit discus mundi -- From the System Administrator's Guide, by Lars Wirzenius [linux/81]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 13h

1 bulls, 3 cows. [miscellaneous/0]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 19h

Caution: Write-protection will not prevent a cartridge being erased by bulk-erasure or degaussing. -- HP Ultrium tape drive user's guide, page 12 [computers/1048]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

Children are like cats, they can tell when you don't like them. That's when they come over and violate your body space. [kids/26]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

What did you bring that book I didn't want to be read to out of about Down Under up for? [art/426]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

if (argc > 1 && strcmp(argv[1], "-advice") == 0) { printf("Don't Panic!\n"); exit(42); } (Arnold Robbins in the LJ of February '95, describing RCS) [linuxcookie/39]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

Mencken and Nathan's Second Law of The Average American: All the postmasters in small towns read all the postcards. [definitions/610]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

In every job that must be done, there is an element of fun. Find the fun and snap! The job's a game. And every task you undertake, becomes a piece of cake, a lark, a spree; it's very clear to see. -- Mary Poppins [songs-poems/294]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

Chaos is King and Magic is loose in the world. [magic/3]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

"I would rather spend 10 hours reading someone else's source code than 10 minutes listening to Musak waiting for technical support which isn't." (By Dr. Greg Wettstein, Roger Maris Cancer Center) [linuxcookie/34]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

Q: What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? A: "The elephants are coming over the hill." Q: What did he say when saw them coming over the hill wearing sunglasses? A: Nothing, for he didn't recognize them. [riddles/56]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

Nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be understood. [wisdom/249]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

Experience Experience is a riverbed, Its source hidden, forever flowing: Its entrance, the root of the world, The Way moves within it: Draw upon it; it will not run dry. -- Lao Tse, "Tao Te Ching" [tao/7]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

Do not worry about which side your bread is buttered on: you eat BOTH sides. [food/28]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

Come quickly, I am tasting stars! -- Dom Perignon, upon discovering champagne. [drugs/30]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

A wife lasts only for the length of the marriage, but an ex-wife is there *for the rest of your life*. -- Jim Samuels [men-women/63]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

Woman was taken out of man -- not out of his head, to rule over him; nor out of his feet, to be trampled under by him; but out of his side, to be equal to him -- under his arm, that he might protect her, and near his heart that he might love her. -- Henry [men-women/542]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

Q: What do you call a principal female opera singer whose high C is lower than those of other principal female opera singers? A: A deep C diva. [riddles/67]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

Trifles make perfection, and perfection is no trifle. -- Michelangelo [art/402]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

We wish you a Hare Krishna We wish you a Hare Krishna We wish you a Hare Krishna And a Sun Myung Moon! -- Maxwell Smart [songs-poems/640]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

All men are mortal. Socrates was mortal. Therefore, all men are Socrates. -- Woody Allen [humorists/8]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

A critic is a bundle of biases held loosely together by a sense of taste. -- Whitney Balliett [art/5]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

Lucy: Dance, dance, dance. That is all you ever do. Can't you be serious for once? Snoopy: She is right! I think I had better think of the more important things in life! (pause) Tomorrow!! [art/231]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

Another war ... must it always be so? How many comrades have we lost in this way? ... Obedience. Duty. Death, and more death ... -- Romulan Commander, "Balance of Terror", stardate 1709.2 [startrek/13]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

Debian Hint #32: The package 'doc-debian' contains some general documentation about the Debian project. It is also available in Spanish (doc-debian-es), French (doc-debian-fr) and Ukrainian (doc-debian-uk). [debian-hints/31]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

Neurotics build castles in the sky, Psychotics live in them, And psychiatrists collect the rent. [medicine/43]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

Reunite Gondwondaland! [politics/431]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

* doogie is turning into manoj <Overfiend> doogie: eventually, we all turn into Manoj <Overfiend> Manoj is Debian's iron <Overfiend> ultimately, we all decay to Manoj [debian/48]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

Wait for that wisest of all counselors, Time. -- Pericles [miscellaneous/579]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

Beauty and harmony are as necessary to you as the very breath of life. [fortunes/35]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

Oh, well, I guess this is just going to be one of those lifetimes. [miscellaneous/413]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

WYSIWYG: What You See Is What You Get. [definitions/1103]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

For some reason a glaze passes over people's faces when you say "Canada". Maybe we should invade South Dakota or something. -- Sandra Gotlieb, wife of the Canadian ambassador to the U.S. [ethnic/28]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

Proper treatment will cure a cold in seven days, but left to itself, a cold will hang on for a week. -- Darrell Huff [medicine/48]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

The telephone is a good way to talk to people without having to offer them a drink. -- Fran Lebowitz, "Interview" [drugs/164]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 24/09/2026

The surest protection against temptation is cowardice. -- Mark Twain [literature/200]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 24/09/2026

It's not whether you win or lose but how you played the game. -- Grantland Rice [sports/75]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 24/09/2026

"Protozoa are small, and bacteria are small, but viruses are smaller than the both put together." [science/382]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 24/09/2026

There are some things worth dying for. -- Kirk, "Errand of Mercy", stardate 3201.7 [startrek/161]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing. -- Redd Foxx [medicine/28]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

As someone pointed out, you could have an attribute that says "optimize the heck out of this routine", and your definition of heck would be a parameter to the optimizer. -- Larry Wall in <199709081854.LAA20830@wall.org> [perl/183]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

Oh, I don't blame Congress. If I had $600 billion at my disposal, I'd be irresponsible, too. -- Lichty & Wagner [politics/369]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

To be loved is very demoralizing. -- Katharine Hepburn [love/132]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

For God's sake, stop researching for a while and begin to think! [science/151]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

<wolfgang> the problem with the 'go find a real girl' admonition is that so few of them actually have naked transformation sequences <reality> Dude, my girlfriend changes like four times a day [debian/28]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

Life without caffeine is stimulating enough. -- Sanka Ad [food/106]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

We all like praise, but a hike in our pay is the best kind of ways. [work/569]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 21/09/2026

Adam and Eve had many advantages, but the principal one was, that they escaped teething. -- Mark Twain, "Pudd'nhead Wilson's Calendar" [kids/7]

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Linux Fortunes @linuxfortunes.bsky.social · 21/09/2026

Depend on the rabbit's foot if you will, but remember, it didn't help the rabbit. -- R. E. Shay [wisdom/53]

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