lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 08/10/2026what? no, no. I haven’t been a Satanist for over…pfffff…10 weeks. 000
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 20/09/2026pretty weird they never show alien washrooms in star wars. 000
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 09/08/2026Been bulking up. Injecting other animals' muscles into my muscles. 000
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 09/08/2026can’t decide if i’d rather have a sunken living room or a sunken heart. 000
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 08/08/2026told my new co-workers my parents had recently been killed by a lynx who’d been feasting on alcohol-soaked fruit from the alley behind Cactus Club. 010
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 01/08/2026you’d be surprised how quickly salted butter melts on my window sill. 000
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 04/06/2026Dear Johannes. Feeding your wife eels you caught in a horse's head off the north coast of Germany seems ill advised at this juncture. Hold off for now. Best. lilooet 100
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 04/04/2026One of my primary rules about dating is please don’t spill things on me. my last gf spilled things all over me every day and i was miserable. 010
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 30/03/2026i got drunk and spent $206 to purchase two barrels of Brent crude oil. 061
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 22/03/2026Hello. i would like to purchase one of your mercury ingots please. 020
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 22/03/2026Hello. I am writing to inform you that your national anthem has grossly exceeded the maximum permissible number of rhetorical questions. 000
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 31/01/2026to be honest i don’t know what a lot of things mean. i just want to keep cruising through life and not get shot i the neck with an arrow. 030
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 30/01/2026The ocean is like a weighted blanket but you never wake. 000
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 12/01/2026i was trying some new vests and the zipper got stuck. i couldn’t get it off. i was trapped in the mall for hours. so i’m sorry i missed your picnic. 010
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 05/01/2026i don’t want to ruffle any feathers but i can’t stop throwing these chickens in the air. 000
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 01/01/2026anyone who’s been eaten by a shark can tell you just how annoying it can be. 000
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 26/12/2025hard to talk WWii with millennial when most of them have never watched Schindler’s Boot. 010
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 24/12/2025every time i go to new jersey i meet new guys eating relish in the forest. 000
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 21/12/2025No one in my family visits me because my rates are so high. 000
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 23/11/2025I always turn down wedding invitations because I know one of the bride or groom will eventually succumb to my lurid eyes, my suggestive remarks, my emails, and my poster campaign and it's not right. 010
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 22/11/2025Are bugs killing me? i think bugs are attempting to take my life. 000
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 09/11/2025if you think im buying 200 lamb lolliops for 14 of my children, you are absolutely right. 010
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 08/11/2025If you need calcium, kissing is a very good gateway to teeth. 010
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 07/11/2025quite a few contacts scream that i am not atable emotionally but all of them aknowledge that i am shelf stable. 000
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 30/10/2025Can you make pizza pops in an air fryer? No one will give me a straight answer. It’s like being in Limbo. 000
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 12/10/2025A lot of feedback I get from job interviewers is that I am too erotic to work at the airport. 011
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 11/10/2025Sometimes getting parts of your body removed has unexpected costs, which are approximately $300. 010
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 08/10/2025Ozem pic is fine but I’ve always lost weight just by having my teeth extracted. 000
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 05/10/2025Sometimes when I’m down, I tell my kitchen staff just to broil everything. 000
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 28/09/2025Suspenseful, timely baseball-film director? (6, 5, 5) [cryptic] 000
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 22/09/2025Neighbourhood Dad (S01, ep 06) Neighbourhood dads race against the clock to dry the mayor's dishes but end up jerking each other off for 17 hours. 111
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 22/09/2025Your nape is like finely, finger-moulded garlic butter. Your shoulders are like those of a lobster. Your hands are also like lobsters. 000
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 18/09/2025I’m sorry I legally re-named two of your children Slobodan Milosovic while you were away. 010
lilooet @lilooet.bsky.social · 13/09/2025A part of my brain wants to order a chimichanga. But reading my notepad, I have very clearly written Do NOT order a chimichanga. 010
