Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 02/10/2026After experiencing the Phoebe phone-free show I have to say, I’d pay good money for a marathon with a Yondr pouch policy. 200
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 01/10/2026Tonight I will do important research: Will Phoebe make me put my Garmin in a Yondr bag? 001
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 01/10/2026OTHER MOMMY trailers during the MLB playoffs when kids will clearly be watching, diabolical 000
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 27/09/2026Myles walking up to “Closing Time” for game 162. I love you, my Millenial anthem king. 011
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 26/09/2026(I’m sure someone has made this joke before but:) The only Claud(e) I acknowledge is Kishi. 010
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 26/09/2026Have the Blue Jays declined since Lukes stopped using “Vertigo” as his walk up 152
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 16/09/2026Stilettos* *reeboks and broken* *water bottles 000
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 15/09/2026I feel very fortunate to live in a time where we get to read and listen to Hanif Aburraqib. 020
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 12/09/2026Halloween costume idea: an 8-leg parlay, an octopus if you will 011
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 02/09/2026Do not ask how the cold open to today’s 60 Songs Sade episode is about “let’s remember some guys,” just embrace it (cc @mrisold.bsky.social) 110
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 27/08/2026This picture I took of my kid running looks like it belongs in a pro runner’s post about switching to the roads. 000
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 22/08/2026Did some Ontario travel this past week and I’m thrilled to report that Sudbury has some great running/cycling infrastructure and the Laurentian U track is just open to the public to run on? Also good murals! 110
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 19/08/2026I’m gonna say that the Tempo mascot Dot is like, short and detached. 110
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 17/08/2026No one tell Doug Ford you can just maintain a Moriyama science centre instead of closing it 141
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 13/08/2026It’s Youth Baseball Day at the SkyDome and I’m sharing my row with an entire U10 team and I have never done this much sitting/standing/up-and-downing with the kids coming and going. It’s a tie game in the 6th. They’re starting the wave. 000
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 03/08/2026Not ready to say goodbye to Daryl Watts and Kevin Gausman in the same year 000
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 03/08/2026Toronto Tempo third jersey blue is so perfect 110
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 01/08/2026I watched Angine de Poitrine while the Blue Jays won their third in a row nobody can tell me anything 040
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 01/08/2026If they add Angine de Poitrine to the bill on the day I’m taking my kid to Osheaga for Tate McRae, I will truly be God’s favourite 110
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 30/07/2026This and not thinking about the 2026 Toronto Blue Jays 010
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 25/07/2026My kid just spent a month at summer camp with an Irish counsellor, and now she asks all questions with a perfect lilt 000
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 23/07/2026Incredibly glad to have watched The Invite instead of the Blue Jays tonight. 030
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 21/07/2026My friends and I decided to cheer for Little like he was closing out game 7 and it worked, dropped that ERA below 23 baybeeeee 120
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 16/07/2026Saw Muse and Bloc Party in summer 2006, saw Muse and Bloc Party in summer 2026. 010
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 15/07/2026Tonight I lived the dream (showed up to trivia with co-workers for the first time and COOKED in the music and movie questions). 010
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 11/07/2026This Padres pitcher’s warm-up music appears to be “Baba O’Reilly” and unfortunately I like that a lot. 000
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 06/07/2026Sorry but 🏴🏴🏴🏴🏴 000
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 04/07/2026Sneaky Dee’s saved. Kyle Lowry retiring a Raptor. Kawhi coming back. Portugal loves Toronto. Cease shoved in Seattle. What the hell, let’s win a soccer game. 031
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 04/07/2026Toronto blue jays winning in Seattle could heal me 000
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 01/07/2026We sang “Right Back To It” at karaoke for Kawhi 020
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 01/07/2026Jays continue to suck but I got a new tattoo so 010
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 25/06/2026Okamato walking up to “Iris” is important to me 000
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 24/06/2026My first time lining up for a Jays giveaway and I secured the bag (it was meant to be) 130
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 17/06/2026Sceptres getting a player nicknamed Simsy, I’m all the way up 010
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 17/06/2026Death, taxes, and Davis Schneider at Fenway. 000
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 15/06/2026I let my 10 year-old daughter stay up to watch the defeat of Carter Hart and instead she had to hear Ron McLean make a roofie joke. 020
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 13/06/2026I saw this sky on the morning the new Olivia came out and my daughter got her first jewelry box and then the Jays went up by 5, June in Toronto forever. 030
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 11/06/2026I need people to understand the very basic fact that any faults Toronto shows during the World Cup are not Olivia Chow’s fault - she inherited the low tax legacy of Ford/Tory. 0102
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 03/06/2026Global Running Day is fake but this is nice 010
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 24/05/2026ISTG my kid would be a goated Jr Jays future announcer, what do I have to do? 020
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 21/05/2026Gotta say that’s one of the best skies I’ve seen in years 000
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 12/05/2026The 2026 Blue Jays are the answer to the hypothetical about risking it all for one shot at greatness 000
Lauren Simmons @laurendorphin.bsky.social · 30/04/2026If Books coming for Angela Duckworth, I used to pray for times like this 000