iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 30/05/2026

[spending weeks scaling the mountain] Me: oh wise monk, thank you for granting me this audience. Please tell me: what is the meaning of life? Monk: ངས་དབྱིན་སྐད་མི་ཤེས། Me: Me: shit

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 24/05/2026

Why should I care if China has my data. They're all the way over there. I'm more worried about America having my data, which is where I am like every day

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 18/03/2026

Me: I don't know how to describe it, I just feel Bad Doctor: I've seen this before. You have low HP Me: what Doctor: *hands me a glass of red liquid* here, drink this Me: is that a health potion? Doctor: it's Gatorade with a shot of vodka Me: Doctor: so yeah, kinda

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 21/02/2026

[naming the months] Me: ok what comes after June Guy who came up with the 12 hour clock system: how about January PM

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 19/02/2026

I miss Websites. A website could be just one video. You could go to "look at my horse my horse is amazing dot com" and listen to a song about a horse that tastes like raisins and turns into a plane. And that would be the website.

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 12/02/2026

Just came up with a new one time verification code 232871 @amazon @apple @microsoft just in case you're interested

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 30/12/2025

"if I pronounce a word wrong, it's because I learned it by reading," I say through tears as my wife's step son roundly mocks me for saying "The Wizard of Ounce"

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 10/12/2025

Overheard at a bar Guy, flirting: all you gotta do is make a roux, a- Woman, drunk: I'm not gonna make a fucking roux ok

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 28/11/2025

For a guy supposedly called my "brother" I've never seen him make broth even once

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 14/10/2025

Overheard: a woman telling her dog "no, no no no, we don't eat gummy worms. You are not a gummy bird"

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 19/09/2025

Me: hey windows can you delete this file please Windows: you got it, j-... omg there's actually a program using it right now Me: omg who 😳 Windows: omg I can't say 🫣

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 07/05/2025

If you're ever in a situation where someone is asking for advice and you don't know what to say, just give a piece of unrelated advice and hope they take it as a metaphor "Man if your car starts sliding, just make sure the wheels are pointed in the direction you're going"

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 11/04/2025

Boyfriend: *Owen Wilson voice* wow Girlfriend: *Jennifer Coolidge voice* wow

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 07/04/2025

Boyfriend: *Owen Wilson voice* wow Girlfriend: *Jennifer Coolidge voice* wow

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 04/04/2025

Came up with the phrase "another feather in my dunce cap". Now I just need to wait until I do something stupid. Shouldn't be long now

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 10/03/2025

*billionaire explaining hard work* imagine standing for 2 hours

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 09/02/2025

Da Vinci assigned to uncle Kyle for Calm Down Time

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 07/02/2025

"Take pronouns out of your email signature, just use the obvious ones" - someone who has never emailed anyone named Taylor

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 20/01/2025

Me: why should I use your dish soap Dawn: look how good it cleans this duck Me: ok well how does it do on dishes? Dawn: again, I can't stress enough how clean this duck is

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 22/11/2024

If a dog wore sandals, they'd probably be Bark-enstocks lol :) Every day it gets harder and harder to get out of bed

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 20/11/2024

The moniker "Mister President" is deeply funny to me. Very 5-year-old coded. Like saying Mister Doctor

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 07/11/2024

You guys hear about the election over here? Crazy stuff

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 14/09/2024

There's a bit of sadness when you're at a restaurant and the food isn't delivered by Your Server. "and who ordered the Alfredo?" You don't know us at all. Jenny would know. Jenny would know who ordered the Alfredo.

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 30/11/2023

Me: I'm sick can you take my shift? Coworker: sure thing me; thank you so much1

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 25/11/2023

They should sell edibles at the airport with the slogan "make every flight a red eye". This would make approximately 600 billion dollars

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Reposted by Kyle 🌱

Lynn Nothegger @lynnnothegger.bsky.social · 26/10/2023

Honestly, I’ve been laughing since yesterday at this.

A screenshot of a Twitter post showing a cow on a beach. Tbe user added the comment ‘mood’, to which another user replied. ‘It probably did’.

(The guy who made the joke is @KylePlanEmoji who should be named cause he’s made me laugh for hours at this)

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 18/10/2023

The difference between cows and cattle is that a cow wont use a litter box, but a cat'll

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 04/07/2023

[first day at Domino's] Manager: oh and one more thing: don't fuck the pizzas Me: haha Asst Manager: seriously, don't fuck them Cook: dont fuck the pizzas dude Me: I'm n- Customer: that guy's not gonna fuck my pizza is he? Manager: not if he wants to keep his job he wont.

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 11/05/2023

I "graduated" handler training at the raptor center and they gave me a falconer glove keychain, which is amazing, but also I love imagining a little imp or a gnomey feller using it to handle like a hummingbird or somethin

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 03/05/2023

Photoshopping in a blue check that I don't have on a screenshot of my to get more engagement on your instagram is weird as fuck

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 28/04/2023

I give them permission to do all this actually. They can also spit in my mouth and tell me I need to work harder if I want mommy's approval

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 27/04/2023

Feels like these days everyone wants to shit but no one wants to wipe. This is, society

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 27/04/2023

I don't think this place is for you friendo

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Kyle 🌱 @kyleplantemoji.bsky.social · 27/04/2023

So far everything here seems all well and good but I'm really wishing there was some way I could pay 8 dollars for this. Anyone looking into this?

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