Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 06/03/2026I really loved the idea of moving and re-decorating until I realized one pillow is literally $25 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 05/03/2026everyday i wake up shocked that i haven't lost 15 pounds overnight from the side salad i ate with my pasta dinner 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 05/03/2026If I had a chip on my shoulder I would just eat it I love chips 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 05/03/2026Hey, I'm not one to come to social media to brag about myself, but I just finished my shampoo and conditioner at the same time. Thank you. 010
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 04/03/2026To all the parents. Do you remember your child's first joke? The idea of a baby suddenly being capable of humor is really funny to me. 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 04/03/2026Just because God feels silent, doesn't mean He's absent. 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 04/03/2026We're all headed down to the dmv to cough with our mouths open if you don't have plans tonight 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 03/03/2026why do i have to wear a seatbelt but the garbage man can hang off the back like that 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 03/03/2026Most unrealistic part of cooking shows? They just slide a whole baking sheet into the fridge like it's Narnia in there. 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 02/03/2026"you're so funny" thanks, socialising has felt like a stage performance since i was 6 years old 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 01/03/2026The person who invented the "skip intro" button deserves a Nobel Peace Prize. 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 01/03/2026hello sharks, I'm here asking for enough money to take a year or two off so I can just think for a minute 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 01/03/2026I will never understand how a needle on a record translates to music 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 28/02/2026As a child, I assumed Martha's Vineyard was owned by Martha Stewart 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 28/02/2026Cleaning your house before you travel so you come back to a clean house >>>>> 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 28/02/2026I love being home in my bed breathing my introvert air. 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 27/02/2026The highest privilege ever is to talk to God without needing an appointment. 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 27/02/2026How long would you go WITHOUT showering if you were paid $10,000 per day 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 27/02/2026"Are you an adult?" Me: Yeah, but not like on purpose or anything 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 27/02/2026Therapist: When did your anxiety start? Me: In elementary school. counting ahead to see which paragraph Id have to read out loud 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 26/02/2026As soon as you actually need a red light to do something in your car, every light suddenly turns green. 081
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 26/02/2026it's fascinating how dogs have their own little bedtime routines 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 25/02/2026i hate it when you're heating something up in the microwave and it starts to go snap crackle pop so you take it out but it's still completely cold. shut up then?? 020
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 25/02/2026Being a reader sometimes means rereading the same sentence 4 times because your brain went on a side quest. 010
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 25/02/2026Imagine you run from the cops at night & your Sketchers start to light up 010
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 24/02/2026Sometimes I feel like my name fits so perfectly like yes that is exactly me. 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 24/02/2026Maybe hot chocolate wants to be called beautiful chocolate just one time 032
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 24/02/2026If I could have any super power it would be to sleep uninterrupted when l'm supposed to sleep and to have energy when l'm supposed to be awake. 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 23/02/20261 out of every 3 blueberries is an absolute nightmare 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 22/02/2026A roll of paper towels doesn’t stand a CHANCE when I’m in the kitchen. 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 22/02/2026let's play a game called how far can I lean off the bed to grab the thing 010
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 22/02/2026Unfortunately my nervous system doesn't know the difference between being chased with a knife and being told to put my car in neutral at the car wash. 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 21/02/2026I don't know who needs to hear this but; you can re-park if you don't get it right the first time. Like, you can try again. 001
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 21/02/2026I will go 2-3 days without spending money & be proud of myself then blow $500 in one hour on the 4th day. 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 21/02/2026no, that's my emotional support pile of unread books 010
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 20/02/2026I’m definitely the person you meet through other people. I’m not outside enough for you to just stumble upon me. 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 20/02/2026At Target, you just gotta accept your total & go with it🤣 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 20/02/2026Never wear headphones while vacuuming. I just finished the whole house and realized I forgot to plug it in 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 19/02/2026laying in bed with the nervous system of someone going to war 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 19/02/2026"your package is out for delivery" ok where because i'll meet them halfway 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 18/02/2026AirBnB is hilarious because imagine paying to travel somewhere and then sitting down to read the host's little list of rules like you're on an episode of WifeSwap. 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 18/02/2026I hate when ppl email back too quickly. i just ticked that off my todo list, now i gotta add this to the list again 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 17/02/2026The best reading experience is finding a sentence so good you have to close the book and stare at the wall for a minute 000
Koreydior @koreydior.bsky.social · 17/02/2026ADHD be like: I didn't forget, I remembered 20 times... just not at the right time. 010
