janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 11/04/2026i love [current year] i love modern technology i love being on the phone with someone and not saying anything to them and just texting them instead even though im still on the phone with them 000 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 02/04/2026Boys vs Girls game night but there's one genderfluid person constantly switching teams so they never lose 020 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 11/03/2026what's the deal with airplane food? one time I was on an airplane and the food was SO BAD that 9/11 happened 000 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 08/02/2026i have found every luigi in those "find luigi" minigame posts. and i don't wanna hear anyone say that pausing the video is cheating. i have an undefeated instagram find luigi record and i didn't get it without using all the tools at my disposal 000 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 30/10/2025would you rather have gay son that bites hair or stew that makes you blind for a day 010 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 29/09/2025kids these days and all their devices and all their chargers... when i was your age, a battery charge was an $800 bail 010 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 25/09/2025being afraid to call ppl "twin" in case they take it as an insult 010 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 29/08/2025the game im best at is "never have i ever". i have literally never done anything 010 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 26/08/2025every interaction i have w horoscope ppl: them: what sign are you? me: guess them: *4 wrong guesses* me: no them: *correct guess* me: yes them: omg that makes so much sense me: ok 010 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 06/08/2025whoever has my voodoo doll, kindly please stop throwing it against the wall as hard as you can, or otherwise forcing it to experience sudden drastic changes in g-forces 000 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 25/07/20253 stooges learning to use modern phrases Mo: you cooked, diva Harry: you ate, queen! Curly: girl, you shat 000 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 03/07/2025there will be a day where you will think about the game for the very last time 000 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 01/07/2025an article online: "sneezing is not dissimilar to the feeling of an orgasm" me after my 38th sneeze in a row, feeling number 39 approaching: i wish i were dead 000 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 28/06/2025when are you gonna release the full version of your hit song "too many melons" 000 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 22/06/2025i just hiccuped twice and then it was over absolutely wild. never happened before next time i'll try for only once 000 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 18/06/2025"just know if you're every having a bad day, [inserts story of someone having an comically terrible day, often with horrific repercussions that still affect people decades later] hope that helps :)" 000 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 17/06/2025calvin harris: "i feel so close to you right now, it's a forcefield" thats so cutesy lemme just look up what a force field does real quick 000 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 27/05/2025jesters have an obvious reason to wear silly little bells. what is a cowboy's excuse for always wearing clinkety little spurs on their boots? who are they entertaining? 010 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 24/05/2025me holding up a [REDACTED] confronting my husband when he comes home from work: who is she? 010 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 17/05/2025of all the games they play on whose like is it anyway, they never once have played zip zap zop 010 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 15/05/2025people always look so cool when they have a cigarette or a toothpick or smth hanging out of their mouth, but when i have a little worm in my nose people just say hello to him 010 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 08/05/2025i like to think that every time there's a fly in my house, it's actually someone who wished to be a fly on the wall during that moment like ok slay, obviously me cooking macaroni right now meant a lot to someone oh fuck they just flew into the glue trap 000 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 05/05/2025japan is living in the year 2050 bc their yogurt doesnt stick to the lid of the container gurt: yo 000 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 03/05/2025do you do your part to fight crime? i do my part to fight crime. if im in a public bathroom, and the toilet paper is on the wrong way, i fix it and the world is just a little brighter because of it 000 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 03/05/2025of all the things ive seen on the internet so far today, thing that really.... TICKED ME OFF the most was someone claiming there's no dill in ranch look up any recipe for ranch, the third or fourth ingredient is freaking dill you fool 000 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 28/04/2025feces would be such a cute baby name if it didn't mean shit 000 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 27/04/2025acab except the doggies. they can be saved. they sniff so good 000 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 18/04/2025just blew my partner's mind. i told her that water isn't blue 000 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 17/04/2025jamais vu is the funniest thing ever. say the word jungle 50 times and tell me it doesn't sound like something roald dahl came up with 000 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 17/04/2025#YIAYdie Reactbot, is there anything you felt the need to say? 000 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 12/04/2025theres a special place in hell for people who dont ask for directions and they will NEVER find it 000 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 01/04/2025book club but we talk about the new fnaf book book club but we talk about the dictionary book club but we talk about an actual matchbook church is just book club for the bible i think im getting somewhere hold on 000 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 30/03/2025therapist: do you find it difficult to make choices on your own? me: concentrate and ask again therapist: put the magic 8 ball down 010 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 22/03/2025i could never be the first to comment on a post. no way. im not there yet. maybe one day. 000 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 22/03/2025if bluesky didn't have a character limit, no one would be safe from my long rambling thoughts. they may be funny. but they would be long. i would weave endless tapestries of odd musings. they would take up the entire real estate of your feed. seamlessly snaking through and around other poor posts wh 010 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 20/03/2025why does everything have to have a different method of cleaning. i wish i could take everything in the bath with me. then we could all be clean all at once. 000 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 08/03/2025yk some trees are self-pollinating. that means i can tell people to "make like a tree and go fuck yourself" 010 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 08/03/2025dear god stay out of it this does not concern u i'm handling it just fine 010 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 08/03/2025the word "cyclists" can apply to more than just people with bicycles. there's motorcycles, unicycles, menstrual cycles, the water cycle 020 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 08/03/2025i love water. sometimes i like to say I can't live without it! 110 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 04/03/2025how do italians have such clean kitchens? they're always throwing salt over their shoulders and throwing salt on things from far away and just throwing things in general (mainly salt) 010 0
janey @kksloth.bsky.social · 28/02/2025im okay if god sends another worldwide flood upon us. bc i know spongebob would be okay. he probably wouldn't know it even happened. 010 0