Look I appreciate Shudder providing a platform for low-profile horror. But OH BROTHER. Nothing that happens in this movie is as scary as the rest of it is annoying. Lester is annoying. Whatever is goi...

"This part's transphobic." "Shut up." Schoenbrun has a distinct eye and sensibility for the surreality of nostalgia. Like the dreamlike quality of an 80s VHS Slasher set to music from the late 90s & 0...

I love how it resets the tragedy of Endgame with the sweetly naive In Memoriam, as only high school students can do. And I'm impressed how the film manages to keep that Teen Comedy vibe. Especially th...

John Hughes' Spider-Man. I love this film so much. Framing a Marvel flick as a Teen Comedy, especially with the 3 principles, just works so well. With an appropriately killer 80s soundtrack. Zendaya b...

Dug is, quite simply, one of the best characters in cinematic history, & a VERY GOOD BOY. There's a lot about Up that makes absolutely no sense, but it still manages realism in the emotions at its cor...

Sometimes the best workplace Rom-Com is 2 robots who can only communicate by saying each others' names. He loves musicals and she loves botany. He's a hopeless romantic and she's dedicated to her job....

People throw around words like "theft" & "robbery" but I submit to this court, your honor, that my client bears a striking resemblance to actor Leo Woodall, & is therefore TOO ADORABLE & CHARMING TO B...

Just weird & uncanny enough to be my kind of shit. The creepy power of liminal space filled with decayed memory. The idea of creating our own living prisons built from our own anxieties is REAL. I wor...

What was up with Lily jumping into the donation box? DRAMA QUEEN omg. Felt almost as messy as TS4 but with a stronger emotional core. Bonnie's anxiety was so palpable to me. And watching her finally b...

Forky as a character speaks to me because I am also trash. And so is this movie, kinda 😬 I don't want to sound too harsh but the 4th installment kinda shits on the entire ethos they spent the first 3 ...

The first film I'm watching fresh & HOLY SHT THEY ARE BRINGING THE PATHOS. So many just heartbreaking moments. Woody leaving Bullseye. Buster aging. Don't even get me started on the incinerator. Even ...

Teasing the Barbie movie 24 years in advance? Marvel could NEVER. Also predicted the Kelsey Grammer heel turn. Really ups the stakes, making the obsolescence of toys emotionally palpable. And the Zurg...

Few things in life have made me laugh as hard as the cult of aliens waiting & hoping for the day they're chosen by The Claw. Randy Newman music still a huge miss for me but it's a wonderful film.

The rural Welsh seaside, cold & windy & gray, is the perfect backdrop for a story of repression & longing. And when a hot married DILF mussel farmer meets a hot twunk deckhand, nature simply takes its course. It's bleak and beautiful in a God's Own Country vein, but with a worrisome subplot playing out in the background. This kind of sad gay tale is well-covered territory, but On The Sea is wonderfully acted, gorgeous visual melancholy, distinct enough to stand out. Both leads earn the secret-affair-to-tender-love progression. And it passed the cry test; I was weeping at the end. A fine addition

I don't think I'll ever get over Macho Grande 😔 There is a Leslie Nielsen-sized hole in this sequel. It hits a nice balance between fresh story & jokes, while still giving the people what they loved a...

The gold standard. After watching the latest Scary Movie & Stop! That! Train! I decided why not go back to the grandaddy. And it's evident what the newer films are missing. This is like a symphony of ...

Inviting comparison to Airplane! or The Naked Gun is just asking for trouble. And Drag Race acting challenges make me cringe with anxiety just thinking about them. So honestly, this impressed me. It's...

Look, it's terrible. But there's something comforting about the stupidity of these films. Dumb & obvious gags that still manage to elicit chuckles, in spite of yourself. That's always been the charm o...

There's a bit of a running joke between Gyllenhaal's Bronco & Cavill's Sid that they're actually a long-time couple. That's as much as we know about their personal lives & I'm choosing to believe. Bec...

I'm not mad but I am disappointed. It's... fine. But most of my interest was hanging on a CGI ahhh dog's fate. And I didn't enjoy that manipulation. It's not terrible per se, but I felt a distinct lac...

I was the perfect age when MTV (or actually Nickelodeon cuz we didn't get MTV) revived The Monkees TV series in 1986. A delightfully bonkers slapstick show about young musicians who, importantly, made...

In the future, Charli xcx will be in every movie for 15 mins. Bethany is the WOOOOOOORST! Like I just know that volcano joke shit was her idea. And as Claude says, "what's the joke? Volcanos kill peop...

Spoiler alert: at no time do ATJ & Theo kiss. Terrible decision. Starts as seemingly 2 movies, involving an unearthed WWII bomb & a bank heist. ARE THEY RELATED??? Lol of course they are. But it takes...

A movie that could have been a season 4 😕 The Mandalorian worked so well as a lower-stakes, serialized work, the kind that inspired Lucas in the first place. I'm sure Disney expected the franchise to ...

No idea how this film eluded me for 40 years. Given the director and the cast you'd think I'd have checked it out at some point. Once again Criterion comes in clutch. This feels less like a film & mor...

The kind of self-consciously edgy/quirky Indie film that makes people think they hate Indie films. The Royal Tenenbaums if Wes Anderson was a psychopath (wait that actually sounds too cool). There's.....

I am a sucker for a tale of a woman who can kick ass & scam her way out of a jam. YOU GO GIRL! Like the first ep she's getting hit from left & right, but you know what? SHE DOES THE DAMN THING. Taylor...

Feels like listening in on a cozy conversation between filmmaker & designer, long-time friends. But if you're looking for anything revelatory or salacious, Sofia isn't doing her bestie like that. Stru...

Pop Diva Anne Hathaway & Fashion Diva Michaela Coel having a perfectly reasonable Mother-off... & then it gets weird. Really weird. I already know there are homosexuals who WORSHIP this film. Should t...

Male Loneliness Epidemic: The Series. Starts off as what feels like a standard Murder Mystery (an unlikable one, at that), but slowly becomes something tragically beautiful. Over the course of 7 eps t...

Recently-minted Action Star Bob Odenkirk back at it again. This time... it's goofier. Very Fargo-coded. I had low expectations cuz I had heard it wasn't well-reviewed, but I fux with it. You can immed...

A worthy addition to the "YIIIIIIIIIKES 😬" Indie canon. A cam boy meeting a client is already a salacious premise, and that's BEFORE things get real. Looks its subject matter in the eye without flinch...

Decades later, & I'm never sure where we landed on Michael Jackson. "Complicated legacy" doesn't really begin to capture the MJ phenomenon. Anyone OF A CERTAIN AGE will already know the milestones of ...

The premise (Action/Comedy about spousal murder) is right up my alley! But what starts as somewhat clever quickly devolves into a bit of a mess (and that's not the blood splatter). It gets overly comp...

Girl, not Yoshi Binks. Not Jar Jar Yoshi. The only way I can describe this is the streaming-era equivalent of a direct-to-video sequel. Like in Family Guy when Stewie does that cutaway joke to Aladdin...

I HATE that cover of Inside Out. So obviously fck Charlie he doesn't deserve Emma but that final scene melted my heart a little idk maybe there's some hope for him. But DEFINITELY fck Rachel for tryin...

A sequel bold enough to proclaim that everything is terrible, quickly getting worse, & the best we can hope for is a temporary reprieve at the largesse of a billionaire savior 🤗 20 years later and And...

In 👏 this 👏 house 👏 we 👏 support 👏 Kathryn 👏 Newton 👏 getting 👏 a 👏 paycheck. Even if it's for this deeply stupid and oddly boring shark movie. One of the most ludicrously hilarious endings I've ever ...

Ah, to be young and insufferable. Spending your days and nights feeling vital and alive. But also constantly performing feeling vital and alive. The music scene of Montreal 2011 is a very specific set...

I'm sure the idea here was to do something similar to Barbie, a self-aware comedic reboot. I also noticed this thing has a pronounced similarity to Flash Gordon (1980), even outright cribbing a song f...

Goths. Real goths. Delightfully stupid. Complete nonsense. Riveting nonsense. I struggle to know what's real & what's movie magic. But then it's all magic, isn't it? And running just beneath the surfa...

Wow. A sometimes surreal, but always lyrical, revenge tale of twin sisters on a mission to find balance for their childhood trauma. It has all the requisite cathartic violence & gore. But it also has ...

I was one of those elder gheys who went absolutely mental over season 1 of Heartstopper. For 2 solid months I watched little else, burrowing myself in the pure, warm embrace of a show that didn't shy ...

I'm really annoyed at how y'all overhyped this SHUDDER original/Blumhouse trash (oh wait that second one IS ACTUALLY REAL). The coolest thing about this garbage is when the credits roll. Ok fine that ...

1. Nancy Meyers slop 2. Set to a "Moms Favorites" playlist 3. Redeemed by a cast making the most of multiple layers of cliché. There's also a pretty good ep 1 twist that hooked me. 1. Wall-to-wall Pin...

A suspiciously secretive woman in roller skates shows up to inspire 2 men to follow their "dream," without once mentioning their "dream" (an oddly fascistic roller disco) will likely be obsolete withi...

Murderin' the multiverse. A revenge flick with a subtle sci-fi undercurrent. It's maybe a bit long but kept me invested. McManus in particular makes a great avatar leading us through her world. Multiv...

I never saw the original Faces of Death. Even as a kid, the premise sounded awful. This high-concept reboot (someone is remaking FoD FOR REALSIES & the internet LOVES IT) does not dispel me of that no...

Knives Out, Babe. (I haven't checked yet but I'm certain I'm the first person to make this joke) Well that was fcking delightful. I honestly went into this film knowing very little. I thought it'd be ...