iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 12/10/2026

When they go low, we kind of crouch and scoop up the muck and kind of smear it on ourselves in hopes of evading The Predator like Arnold Schwarzenegger, even though it really stinks and doesn't work, and only attracts the Predators attention and also saps our health and also

010

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 11/10/2026

How awesome must it have been for the guys in Nirvanna when Weird Al called to ask them permission to do Smells like Nirvanna

000

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 11/10/2026

Can't wait until the Jurrassic Park movies finally bring a dinosaur to space and it's somehow a bad movie

000

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 10/10/2026

Find yourself someone who looks at you the way this random stranger looked at the 12ft tall skeleton at menards

000

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 10/10/2026

'Tis a poor craftsman that blames his tools, but man, these tools really are shit

000

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 10/10/2026

V/H/S MIXTAPE Man, this franchise has been hit or mix for a while, but who could've known GWAR was still a thing

000

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 10/10/2026

Is it just me, or has Ai slop really gotten a good foothold here in the last week or so? Feel like I'm blocking WAY more of it lately

000

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

Depends on the cat tho, doesn't it?

000

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 04/10/2026

Is Jimothy out National Hero? Could Jimothy be responsible for IT happening?

000

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 04/10/2026

I appreciate the inevitable doom, but I'd like a shorter timeline please

000

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 03/10/2026

[wakes up in a cold sweat] I need to get a corvette and paint it star wars colors and call it Boba Vette

010

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

MIL: Wow my daughter really is trying to ruin your life Wife: My mom is trying to break us up Me: Tell your mom to knock thay shit off Wife: Why can't you be more respectful of my mom's attempts to destroy us? It is *you* who are the problem!

000

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

Hello contractor friends and contractor companies! If you come out for a "free estimate," it's because I'm doing research. If you hit me with high pressure sales, it's over. I'm not using you. If you hit me with a "one time first visit special offer," I'm not using you.

100

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

This implies that the roadrunner *is* able to enter the coyote life, taking the coyote wife and children for his own, the ultimate power move.

000

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

Schmidt: "Are you conspiring to find President Trump GUILTY?!?" Kevin Smith: "I dont even know why I'm here?"

001

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

Schmitt "Mr Smith, is it TRUE you made several movies in the 90's that continue to be cult hits?!? Klobuchar: "You're thinking of KEVIN Smith"

000

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

He also doesn't have the legal authority to demolish the white house, among other things he's already done, so please fucking spare me

000

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

MIL only listens to country radio, and I swear to God this plays every other song. I'm jealous of yall that haven't had it

110

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

I know he has a name, but my wife and I only refer to that Ted Lassso actor as "Oi, cunt!" no matter what role we see him in

000

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

"Like past tech revolutions" meaning we all throw wooden shoes at it until it chokes and dies

000

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

Umm Maybe there's other disqualifying factors, like linking the wrong story

000

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

Muppet Lord of the Flies, but Miss Piggy plays Piggy and the movie ends very differently

000

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 24/09/2026

Trembling, I peek at the screen through my fingers, repeating to myself "it's just a show, its just a show, I should really just relax"

000

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

Once, an overworked frazzled cashier short-circuted and tries to tell me to "Have a nice day" and "Enjoy the rest of [my] day" and they told me to "Have a day" and I still think about it. It was so funny to see it in real time and know what happened because that happens to me all the time

100

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

Man, Trump was published in the files at least 3x It's shameful, but nobody cares. Its not the silver bullet you think it is.

000

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

I have a similar deal with spiders, "You're welcome to live here friend, but only if i never see you." Except jumping spiders because they're adorable; they're always welcome.

000

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

To paraphrase George Carlin "Think of how stupid the average person is? Half of them ate even stupider than that!"

000

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

Best advice i never took was "Dont get old" Passed it onto my kids, who've also ignored it

000

Reposted by I M P R I S O N

RoseInOregon @roseinoregon.bsky.social · 21/09/2026

This 100% 🇺🇸 Nothing he does makes sense unless you look at it from Putin’s perspective of dismantling our democracy. Who exactly is winning here?

26080142420

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

Why won't he drive writers? What a weirdo

010

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 20/09/2026

On the one hand, Fuck Ed Sheeran for not supporting his fellow artists, But on the other hand, Fuck Ed Sheeran for making me think about Ed Sheeran

000

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 20/09/2026

Once upon a time I had a game that wouldn't run on my laptop, so I asked a friend if he was a gamer, and he somehow thought I was calling him a GAY Mr and it didn't go well until I produced the game I wanted to give him

011

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 19/09/2026

Hello, Men. You might think the important thing about watching a show with your wife is tho bonding No The important thing about watching a show with your wife is the complete inability to relax It been a joke in the past, but there's nothing a woman hates more than watching a man fucking relax

000

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 19/09/2026

THERES EMPTY PARKING FOUR SPOTS AWAY, DARREN. JUST FUCKING PULL THROUGH. WALK AN EXTRA TWENTY FEET

010

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 19/09/2026

"Mom is want evil" "We've got evil at home. "

000

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 18/09/2026

Ive been calling her "Gal Godot, Genocide Enthusiast" Similar to how I call Jared Leto "Oscar award winning sex pest Jared Leto"

012

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 18/09/2026

It's sad to think that shitposters will never be on "Americas Got Talent"

000

I M P R I S O N @kamakaziebear.bsky.social · 18/09/2026

Billy Bob Thornton voice "Muh NAME. Is MAXimuss. DESSimuss. merIDIuss. HUSband to a murdhered WHYFE. FATHer to a murdhered SON. Ahnd AYH whill HAVE mah reVENGe ihn this lyfe ohr the NIXT!"

000