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Josh "cortex" Millard

@joshmillard.bsky.social
651 followers 99 following 1.3K posts

Artist and weirdo and etc. from Portland, OR. Fractal fixation. Online to a deeply unfortunate degree. Ran MetaFilter for a while. Today in Tabs idiot. Blaseball will never die, RIP Blaseball.

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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 6h
Realized watching Bakeoff that the torturous framing of their voiceover transitions is basically Yoda grammar. "Also adding a tropical flair to his poundcake is Jaleel." Sure thing little buddy, now help me get this ship out of the fucking swamp.
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
Fighting and dying in the trenches to protect the three day work week, as an LLM Infantryman in the 17th Modal Auxiliary
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
Fascinating to think that this one small idea in the mid 20th C. would eventually lead to the CueCat-dominated consumer economy we all take for granted today
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
god we're old
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
sitting absolutely still in the La-Z-Boy of Heaven
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
choosing to believe this is about an alternate ending to The Fly where Gina and Jeff find a way to work it out, settle down, raise several million kids,
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
do you think paw patrol ever shows up to the wrong house and shoots someone's pet human
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Aw fuck. RIP.
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
Was in a band called Unstable Isotope, but we broke up pretty quickly
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
Gonna write up a critical essay about AI-generated Art Content, title is “The Aesthetics of Extrusion”, the opening paragraph will be me just barfing uncontrollably on every dipshit excited about hyperscaling the excision of humans feeling things and being weird from the process of making shit
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
in before "they got robbed"
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Mr Beast: [finds out about bread lines] huh. Okay but stay with me: what if only ONE of them gets the bread
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
I fucking KNEW him, Horatio
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Iron Literal Maiden
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
How's the world treating ya, Mr. Big Dumb Dad
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
in another time this is roughly what Carson would have said while holding up an envelope
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
the preserve my mortal form in WOIMS
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
Franchise Experiments: Lain
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
I adore it
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
Yeah, yeah, the suddenly profoundly hot Nathan Fielder, we’ve all seen it
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
Bryan Cranston, eight mechanical arms unfurling behind him to menace Spider-Man:
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
Not gonna lie, before I scrolled down to the quote post I had started fully believe this was about a GGR-themed idle game and I’m a little sad now despite otherwise being pleased by sharez0ne content
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
Hell yeah. I would say less redundant than self-reinforcing. Something delightful about approaching a thing from multiple overlapping and conceptual layers in consonance. Fuckin' ley-line ass artwork.
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
man why did they take this picture on a dark night
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
Large Language Marges
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
Knowledge of the context - still has not come - came in a social media post - came in a detailed sociopolitical analysis - came in a fluff piece
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
Pancetta! At the Disco
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
"Bananas in the breakroom"
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
looking forward to finding out whose preordered copies did and did not come
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
the internet is just a giant collective rolling hospice for Not Having To Have Known About That, and we're all running out one or another clock
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
just grab a hammer and whack on your patio floor a bit in solidarity
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
is that what the kids are calling it
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
once again experience one of life's great reifications of irony: having a sore back from putting together the chair I bought because the old chair was giving me a sore back
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
yessss
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
you can remember this with the straightforward mnemonic of imagining 90s Torontonian rap sensation Snow singing "helico pter pter down"
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
An unraveling Gene Hackman sitting on the floor of his dismantled apartment, playing Trombone Champ
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Somebody torch-a my spaghet
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Death Cab For Charcuterie
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
Press this button and you will get zero dollars but someone you don’t know will be annoyed
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
Any chance we can throw Google out of a bar
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
you're right about a lot of things, but this is one of them
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
[somberly] diesel's nuts
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
aw man fuckin' Cameron's, I used to walk past that every morning for a shitty job in the early 2000s
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
The Torment Loose Federation of IoT Emplacements
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
just learned from a random TikTok of the existence of the 1984 film Invitation to Hell, directed by Wes Craven (!!) and starring Robert Urich and Susan Lucci (!!!!!) and god help me I'm gonna have to find and watch this fucking thing
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Too hot to handle Too cold to hold It’s called dry ice and You’ve got serious frostbite
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
alt.bub.snikt.snikt.snikt
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Roko's Parasocial Fixation
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
somebody about to get bananned
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Josh "cortex" Millard @joshmillard.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
“You steal those impressionist paintings yet?” Sure thing, boss. Really shitty, just like you asked.
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