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John Pendal

@johnpendal.bsky.social
155 followers 166 following 106 posts

I'm an online coach helping English speaking adults all over the world. I specialise in kink and neurodivergence. Coaching website is www.johnpendal.com ... other sites: linktr.ee/JohnPendal

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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
We're getting regular photos from home while we're away. This is Tommy being cheeky as usual.
Photo of a cat sitting by an open door, staring at the camera and sticking his tongue out. It's a very cheeky expression
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
On Sunday 1st November I'll be teaching an online workshop on "Pain Management". I'll be giving some background on what pain is and why it's possible to change it, along with practical tips to try afterwards. There will be a handout you can download to read at the time or keep for later.
A square image that says "1 Nov 2026. Pain Management with @KinkyLifeCoach ... PAIN .... with John Pendal"
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Some thoughts on autism assessments, and whether or not I think you need one to be able to say that you're autistic. #autismassessments #actuallyautistic
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
I've always felt shame about my poor spatial awareness, until I found out that autistic folk are more likely to struggle with proprioception: your body's ability to sense its own position, movement, and location in space without having to look. #proprioception #spatialawareness #actuallyautistic
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
My latest blog post is a list of Autism and ADHD resources by people of global majority. If you'd like to take a look it's at www.johnpendal.com/blog.html ... or if there's anything you'd like me to include please let me know. x x
johnpendal.com
Blog posts from John Pendal
Blog posts from John Pendal - mostly about autism, ADHD, Alexithymia and some other forms of neurodivergence
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
I've been interviewed for The Sanctuary podcast about autism and kink. The Sanctuary Podcast Website: www.thisisthesanctuary.com/the-sanctuar... YouTube: youtu.be/VxH2vZRdnfU Instagram: www.instagram.com/p/DcyprgWxeCx/ Also on Spotify, iTunes, Google, and other podcast services
thisisthesanctuary.com
The Sanctuary Episode 176: John Pendal – Online Coach/ Kink Educator – The Sanctuary
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
I've just added a list of support resources around ADHD and AuDHD to my blog at: www.johnpendal.com/blog.html #adhd #audhd
johnpendal.com
Blog posts from John Pendal
Blog posts from John Pendal - mostly about autism, ADHD, Alexithymia and some other forms of neurodivergence
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
Just got home from another Kink Convention in Denmark. It was an amazing experience connecting with friends and learning new points of view. One of my new experiences was being loaned dinosaur headgear at lunch on Sunday. I genuinely had no idea how deliriously happy it would make me.
Photo of John smiling at the camera, wearing a foam and fabric dinosaur head. It also has a set of teeth under his chin held with a velcro strap, so his face is looking out of the dinosaur's mouth.
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
If you're autistic and you love Lego and dinosaurs I can recommend Billund Airport in Denmark.
A large blue T-Rex sculpture made of blue Lego, holding a large yellow Lego suitcase with a baby T-Rex poking out of the case.
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 06/08/2026
Tommy is up for playing through the bannisters today.
A photo through bannisters to a hallway landing, where a cute cat sits tall looking wired and alert.
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 04/08/2026
Last week I posted a reel sharing some of my thoughts why autistic people might drink alcohol in social situations. Someone commented that what I was describing was the disease of alcoholism. I've thought about that a lot & took a test at www.drinkaware.co.uk/tools/drinki...
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 31/07/2026
We saw 𝐒𝐩𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐫-𝐌𝐚𝐧: 𝐁𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐍𝐞𝐰 𝐃𝐚𝐲 last night and LOVED it. There were lots of posters up in the cinema saying "please don't give away any spoilers" and I agree. We enjoyed it more not knowing - so please don't say any plot points in the comments.
A still from the movie: Spiderman kneels on a top of an armoured trunk driving down a street. He's wearing a bright blue and red lycra suit, with metal web launchers on each wrist.
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 29/07/2026
Some thoughts on why autistic people might drink alcohol. #actuallyautistic
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 20/07/2026
Trying to answer the question: "What is Autism?" #actuallyautistic
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 14/07/2026
This year I've heard politicians from both left and ring wing parties say that autism assessments are out of control and putting pressure on our health services. This is my response. #actuallyautistic
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 06/07/2026
𝐈𝐬 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐲 𝐌𝐞𝐭𝐚𝐥 𝐚𝐧 𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠? In my first year of coaching I was struck by how many autistic people are into Heavy Metal music. Here are some of the reasons they gave.
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 03/07/2026
The face of adorable cuteness or contemplating evil? You decide.
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 29/06/2026
We saw "Supergirl" at the cinema last night. It wasn't as bad as the reviews made out. It was passable. I don't regret watching it. Let's start with the good points: Milly Alcock and David Corenswet are perfectly cast as Supergirl and Superman.
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 23/06/2026
If you're wondering why all my clothes have cat hair on them ....
A cat looks up out of a cupboard. The cat is squeezed in, sitting on top of a pile of clean clothes.
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 22/06/2026
It's a fan-made trailer and not actually advertising a real series ... but I love this: www.youtube.com/watch?v=ARdZ...
youtube.com
DOCTOR WHO New Series Trailer 2027 - KIONIC
YouTube video by KIONIC
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 20/06/2026
𝐍𝐞𝐮𝐫𝐨𝐝𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐯𝐬 𝐀𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐬𝐦. I've seen some people ask us to stop using the word neurodivergence, as it's such a broad category it's almost meaningless. This is my response.
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 17/06/2026
Panda and I saw "Disclosure Day" last night. Although I've tried to avoid spoilers I'm aware that half the reviews I've seen have loved it, and the other half didn't. I'm in the latter category.
A still from the movie. Emily Blunt is standing in a child's bedroom with a light on her. She is looking up into the light. We can't see what she is looking at.
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 11/06/2026
𝐏𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐚𝐫𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐜𝐥𝐨𝐮𝐝𝐬 My partner and I have struggled with timekeeping. I normally see times as fixed and he often sees them as moveable. Here's our solution. #pillarsandclouds #ActuallyAutistic
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 07/06/2026
Panda and I have just seen "Tuner" at the cinema, starring Leo Woodhall and Dustin Hoffman as a pair of piano tuners in New York. Leo Woodhall's character has hyperacusis, so any loud noise is physically painful and he lives wearing earplugs and headphones.
An image from the movie. Dustin Hoffman and Leo Woodhall are standing side by side in an open doorway, ready to walk in and tune a piano. Leo's character is wearing large noise cancelling headphones.
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 01/06/2026
Having a Social Safe Word When I met my partner he struggled with the fact I would overstay at parties out of loyalty to him, then disappear without saying goodbye because I'd exhausted my social battery. Here's our solution. #actuallyautistic
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 31/05/2026
We've found the entrance to an underground bumblebee nest in our lawn today. Lots of comings and goings. #beelife
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 28/05/2026
We've had a hive for solitary bees in our back garden for a few years - without any interest. A month ago we moved it to the front of our house and today I noticed two of the bamboo poles have been blocked with fresh green leaf material. It's made me very happy. #leafcutterbees #solitarybees
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 25/05/2026
Hope you're all surviving the heatwave in the UK. For those that don't understand, anything over 25 degrees C in the UK is more unpleasant than 100 degree F weather abroad. I don't know if it's the humidity, the way houses are built or the lack of air conditioning, but the UK is not built for this.
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 24/05/2026
Last night we endured watching the new Jack Ryan movie on Amazon: 𝐉𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐑𝐲𝐚𝐧: 𝐆𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐖𝐚𝐫. It became a hate-watch in the end. We finished it, but both gave it 4/10. Despite saying that John Krasinski co-wrote the story and the screenplay, it honestly had the feel of being written by AI.
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grandstrandaffair.bsky.social @grandstrandaffair.bsky.social · 09/05/2026
Come see @johnpendal.bsky.social at our classes at #GrandStrandAffair this November in Myrtle Beach! #BDSM #LeatherCommunity #Kink #Fetish #LGBTQ
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Thriving Autistic @thrivingautistic.bsky.social · 08/05/2026
One of our members David O'Bryne has built an app for clients to capture their thoughts during the week between sessions The app/data is 100% private, all stored on the user's phone with no accounts, sign-up or cloud storage Download for free in the app stores now www.therapy-tracker.com
therapy-tracker.com
Therapy Tracker — Know what to say in therapy
Therapy Tracker helps you capture thoughts between sessions so you walk into therapy knowing exactly what to say. Free on iOS and Android.
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 08/05/2026
A week's holiday in Spain in statistics: 12 gluten free baguettes eaten 11 hours sleep on second night here 4 Supermarket chains visited looking for gluten free goodies 3 workouts at the gym 2 Reacher books read 1 gluten free tiramisu
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 04/05/2026
Panda and I are back in Nerja, Spain for a week - so we get to go to our favourite gym: South Fitness Nerja. It's clean, with a good selection of weights and a very inclusive crowd: men, women, old, young, sports athletes and new beginners all getting on. #fitat50 #gymonholiday
Photo of John standing outside the open door of South Fitness gym in bright sunshine. He's smiling at the camera. You can see a glimpse of the gym through their open doorway.
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 28/04/2026
We took our cat Lizzie to the vets this morning for sedation and tests. She passed them all and is back home now ... but definitely plotting to kill us x
A grumpy looking cat stares directly in the camera with evil on its mind.
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Thriving Autistic @thrivingautistic.bsky.social · 24/03/2026
Re-sharing some of our fabulous short neuro-affirming animations created by our team at Thriving Autistic Discovering You're Autistic shares the strengths and possibilities that come with understanding yourself and finding belonging. Find out more thrivingautistic.org/autistic-exp...
thrivingautistic.org
Educational Animation Videos about Autistic Experiences
Our two new neuro-affirming educational animation videos celebrate Autistic experiences and perspectives.
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 22/03/2026
We saw Paddington the Paddington The Musical last night. It was one of the best things we have ever seen at the theatre. Magical and joyous. It follows the plot of the 2014 Paddington movie very closely with all your favourite moments recreated, with added songs.
A photo of the outside of the Savoy Theatre. Anm old London building is adorned with a brightly lit blue and red sign for Paddington the Musical, with a smiling bear's face under a bright red hat.
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Una McCormack @unamccormack.bsky.social · 21/03/2026
Pure love for this.
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 21/03/2026
We saw "Project Hail Mary" at the cinema last night. Brilliant, brilliant film. If you liked Gravity, Arrival or The Martian you'll love this. It's hard to review without giving away spoilers. It's definitely better the less you know going in.
A scene from the movie. Ryan Gosling is strapped into the pilots seat of a spaceship, surrounded by panels with yellow lights. He's looking worried.
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 20/03/2026
I've just uploaded a new blog post, with tips and suggestions for people who struggle with certains sounds and smells: www.johnpendal.com/blog.html
Photo of John smiling at the camera. He is wearing Bose Noise Cancelling headphones and holding up a small orange box containing Loop Engage earbuds.
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 02/03/2026
I'm making a list of things people say when they think someone else might be autistic. So far I have: On the Suspectrum Autingle and 'Tism Tickle Do you know of any others? x x
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 23/02/2026
We saw "Good Luck, Have Fun, Don't Die" last night ... the new time travel film directed by Gore Verbinski starring Sam Rockwell. The set up: a crazy look man walks into a diner claiming to be from the future wanting to save the world. Beyond that, it's best you avoid all spoilers.
A still from the movie. Sam Rockwell is at the front, three other cast members behind him. They are looking shocked and terrified. Sam is wearing a weird plastic coat covered in electronics. The whole image has a green hue.
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 14/02/2026
Posting on behalf of an autistic student researcher completing a Level 8 dissertation at ATU. They are looking for autistic adults aged 40+ to take part in a study exploring how nature and outdoor environments support identity, wellbeing, and self-regulation.
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Thriving Autistic @thrivingautistic.bsky.social · 06/02/2026
Aged 18-24years? Newly Identified Autistic, or maybe you have clients you'd like to refer to our Discovery Programme? 6 weeks starting 18th Feb 2026 Neuro-affirming Find out more about your Autistic identity Build community support Funded spaces available thrivingautistic.org/discovery-pr...
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 07/02/2026
I was given a dinosaur egg to hatch as a Christmas present. I haven't had one before. You put it in a bowl of water for 14 days until it hatches. I don't think anything has given me this much joy (except for my wedding day, my husband pointed out.) #autisticjoy #dinosauregg
A small, rubber, yellow dinosaur stands next to a broken orange dinosaur egg. They are both submerged in a bowl of clear water.
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 22/01/2026
Arrived safely in Chicago. First stop was a beard trim from Mitchell at Father & Son barbershop (fatherandsonbarbershop.com). Next stop hitting up a gluten free bakery or two before the temperature drops to minus 20 C/ minus 4 F!!! #beardtrim #beardlife #cantbelieveitsthiscold
Two beared men: barber Mitchell and John, smile at the camera with arms around each other in the middle of a barbershop.
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 20/01/2026
There's a new post now available on my blog. This has a list of support for neurodivergent families, at www.johnpendal.com/blog.html
Things to say when are kids are anxious or scared: I'm here and I've got your back ... what questions do you have? What are you wondering about? ... we'll take it one step at a time and focus on what we have control over ... even though we don't have all the answers, when we know more I'll let you know too ... let's see how we can take good, kind care of your feelings.
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 15/01/2026
Found a frame for my favourite Christmas card. The card says: "Dear Santa, Please define 'good'. Thanks." Yep. That's about right.
A card is in a black and gold art deco frame. The card has white writing on a dark green plain background. The writing says: "Dear Santa, Please define 'good'. Thanks."
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 12/01/2026
Panda and I saw "Song Sung Blue" at the cinema last night. It's a jukebox musical using the songs of Neil Diamond, loosely based on the plot of a real life married couple Neil Diamond tribute act.
A still from the movie: "Song Sung Blue". Kate Hudson and Hugh Jackman singing together at a piano.
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 01/01/2026
Happy New Year's Day! Wishing you all a peaceful and calmer 2026 x x
John wrapped up warm on a cold beach on New Year's Day. He's wearing a furry hat and red jacket
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John Pendal @johnpendal.bsky.social · 24/12/2025
Happy solstice, Christmas, New Year .... whatever you celebrate (or don't) - wishing you all the best for this year and next. Hugs, John
John outside in the dark, sitting on a box. Behind him is a pair of large rainbow colour angel wings lit up casting a glow on his face.
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