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James Linzel

@jlinzel.bsky.social
491 followers 2.5K following 1.4K posts

Whatever garbage you read here, let it be known that it was at least vomited up by a genuine human brain

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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 54m
Also, actually playing the music is a very joyous, human thing to do even if everybody hates it and you suck because not all music-making is or ought be about audience pleasing, money making, fame/respect obtainment, demonstration of technical mastery, or production of some lasting artifact
Calvin in bed with Hobbes: "Nothing spoils fun like finding out it builds character."
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 13/10/2026
When your annual synth budget is in the thousands of cents
A Yamaha portasound pss-80 stacked on a Yamaha portasound pss-130. The pss-130 is an older model so the 80 actually has significantly more features
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
Good morning to the the creepies and/or crawlies
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Oh shit shoulda waited for the zoom out
A shot from further back in the same production, showing the full array of dangling microphones
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
I don't know who the sound engineer is here, but I respect the hell out of 'em for doing the best they can with what they got
A still from a bengali production, where the sound guy has just hung every sm-58 style mic in the house from the rafters by their xlr cables
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Morning gastropod derby, courtesy of underneath the recycling bin
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
Truly galaxybrained to post about your fear of invasion and desire to protect the british race underneath the handle "Craigus Decimus" Like, "Hello, I'm Hamdrew "Rockbarrier" Jacksonson, I'm here to talk to you today about landback"
User "Craigus Decimus" pitches buck standard replacement theory nonsense. Quote: That is your opinion Sarah and I respect it. But at least try and understand that many of us simply oppose the level of immigration and see Farage as the only way to stop the demographic replacement of the British race. Would you really, honestly want this in your community? End quote. Below, a depiction of 350 Piddington residents in a field compared to "1250 migrants being moved there."
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
I was just enjoying some beverages from under the kitchen sink and goddamnit
A recall notice from the Consumer Product Safety Commission website for Clorox Puerto Rico's Mistolin and Lestoil multipurpose scented cleaners, which may contain bacteria including Pseudomonas aeruginosa.
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 01/09/2026
"I want the CEO with the biggest chin you have ... "
Hans Moleman from the Simpsons, in a phonebooth with broken glass and birds flying aggressively around. The punchline is "No, that's too big."
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 21/08/2026
Two men posturing aggressively at each other in a wedding chapel, in suits with the arms torn off at the shoulders, from the classic HBO nonsense Mr. Show with Bob and David, the wedding scene from the Spite Marriage sketch.
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 01/08/2026
Achewood comic strip, wherein a character arriving says, "Hey guys! guess who just got yelllled aaat!"
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 31/07/2026
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 19/07/2026
I saw Jurassic Park at just the right age to be severely traumatized by guy getting chormped off the toilet
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 23/06/2026
"But Sirhey is a dude's dude, who really knows what dudes want to hear when they're imagining talking to a chick!"
John Ennis from "Mr Show with Bob and David" over a phone number 1-800-55-GYRLZ, providing a testimonial for Glenn Peterson's sex hotline operating skills from Season 4 episode 3 "Rudy Will Await Your Foundation"
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 30/05/2026
Presently at the America 250 planning bunker:
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 07/05/2026
Obviously an early form of leech storage, a la another post going around:
A bright green ceramic urn with a perforated lid, labeled "LEECHES" in gold painted print
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 22/03/2026
Milwaukee is a pioneer in the field:
Ad for Milorganite, with the product logo and the slogan "For Better Results." Milorganite is a portmanteau of Milwaukee Organic Nitrogen and is produced from material from the Milwaukee Metropolitan Sewer District.
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 14/03/2026
Dennis Reynolds of It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia, midframe while saying "TWooooooooo wars?" in an extremely exaggerated manner
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 08/03/2026
Recent video of SecDef Hegseth
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 28/02/2026
Seen in Milwaukee, WI
A sticker saying free Palestine over the image of a domed building surrounded by a crowd in silhouette
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 28/02/2026
Seen in Milwaukee, WI
A sticker say free Palestine across the top and stop the war machine across the bottom surrounding a picture of a tank with its barrel twisted into a knot
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 05/02/2026
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 10/12/2025
Mono courier, all caps anything more is vanity
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 30/11/2025
THERE IS NO CEILING, ONLY STRONG FLOOR
Dana Barrett in Ghostbusters (1984) professing there is no dana, only zuul.
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 17/11/2025
That's why you ALWAYS leave a vote
The one-armed man from Arrested Development frequently employed by George Sr. to teach his sons lessons
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 13/11/2025
To answer my own question... yes!
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 10/11/2025
A time traveler walks among us...
Side by side comparison of Malcolm Cowley, pictured in the linked article, and Paul F. Tompkins, looking like the spitting image of same.
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 08/10/2025
There's a thing for that
The website splash for the Florida Department of Transportation Inspector General's Waste Fraud and Abuse Accountability Hotline with phone number 1-800-255-8099
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 04/09/2025
They're taking my office toaster oven
Milton Waddams from Office Space, who suffered a mental breakdown partially precipitated by removal of his favorite piece of office equipment
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 12/07/2025
Jack Donoghy from 30 Rock is talking to Plankton from Spongebob. He says: "It's not because you're a, I'm sorry. What do you call yourself?" Plankton replies, "A plankter." Jack says, "No, I know you can say that, but what do I call you?" Plankton again replies, "A plankter!" Jack finally responds, "Wow, that does not sound right."
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 30/06/2025
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 01/06/2025
Yup.
Kramer and Neuman from the television show Seinfeld have their game of Risk violently overturned by an angry Ukrainian man on the subway
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 26/05/2025
If you're around the Milwaukee area, stop on by Vegga's Pub on June 8, have a drink, play some dice with the bartender, and listen to a song or three performed by Hunter Park (She Returns From War) and the inimitable Lily Slay (of the Royal Tinfoil). These ladies never disappoint!
A poster advertising a show at Vegga's Pub in Milwaukee: She Returns from War and Lily Slay, Sunday, June 8th, 5 pm, ages 21 plus.
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 14/05/2025
It's always fun to be reminded that amidst all the truly amazing and delightful students we have the pleasure of teaching, there are some truly sociopathic little shits that I usually just try to forget exist
The Policies and Resources for Instructors page summarizes vital information to support you and your students at the end of this semester. If you are assigning any F grades this semester please pay special attention to the ‘F’ Grade Policy, accurate recording of student F-grades is critical, as failure to document participation can result in substantial financial liability for UWM.
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 20/04/2025
A bunn, chillin'
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 28/03/2025
It's familiar territory
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 18/03/2025
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 22/02/2025
63 years later, their closing paragraph has pretty much come true. Sure, you have to steal all the world's literary output and boil off a few rivers, but you can yell at a computer and it'll talk back now.
Another page of text, titled "How A. B.'s poems are written." The article reveals that A.B. is an "auto-beatnik", an early foray into the AI space, and the poems are essentially procedurally generated from word lists.Another page of text, the continuation of the A.B. article. The final paragraph: "We believe that a computer can be programmed to write meaningful and relevent sentences in proper English. And we hope to tackle the problem of conversing with a computer in purely natural speech, as we would with a person. At first, of course, the "talking" will take place by means of an electric typewriter, but eventually a true man-machine dialogue should be possible."The cover of the magazine containing the A.B. article: Horizon, May 1962
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 22/02/2025
Found in a 1962 issue of Horizon: some uncanny poetry.
A page of text: "A new American Poet Speaks: The works of A. B."A page of text, consisting of nine poems. One of them is titled "Bassoons" and reads as follows: Ah, so apologetically did their small rowdies cringe beside a tramp. 
Beneath a ballad, should a rooster harangue like the prostitute?

The remaining  poems are of similar quality.
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 07/02/2025
How I think I look when teaching / How I actually look
Charlie from Its Always Sunny In Philadelphia in front of his mailroom conspiracy wallBarry Zuckercorn, the lawyer from arrested development, making airquotes and saying I'm not quote super prepared unquote
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 06/02/2025
Jeopardy style:
George Costanza from Seinfeld exclaiming "What is papier mache?" in frustration at his pretentious girlfriend
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 14/01/2025
Prior to the inaugural balls, plural?
A man in a suit says "Those are balls." It is a scene from the television show Arrested Development featuring The Fonz as Barry Zuckercorn, the family lawyer for the Bluths.
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 10/01/2025
Alright, Judge Merchan, you know what to do
A pair of legs with a comically large boot, from the Simpsons episode "Bart vs Australia"
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 08/01/2025
All thanks to the Stonecutters
A scene from The Simpsons, wherein the Stonecutters are at a table hoisting steins and singing a song about all the conspiracies they are involved in. The verse shown is "Who makes Steve Guttenberg a star?" which is followed by "We do! We do!"
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 07/01/2025
MLK Jr Blvd a few minutes ago... Somebody's getting yelled at for this one #MKE
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 12/11/2024
Heh, good luck with that. Maybe it'll stick, but the current lingo is pretty sticky already.
An anonymized interaction claiming the local terminology for posting here on bluesky is "flutters" and "reflutters"
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 01/11/2024
And the number nine is.... pretty specific...
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 01/11/2024
I don't know or want to know what his voice sounds like in real life, but in my head, all these quotes are read in "Ross Gellar in his most annoying moments" voice
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James Linzel @jlinzel.bsky.social · 30/10/2024
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