Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 03/03/2026Such a lost opportunity for drug companies advertising injectable GLP-1s not using an upbeat cover of Elliott Smith’s “Needle In The Hay”. 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 13/02/2026Why is it always abstenence-only sex education and not anal-only sex education? So many men would discover the joys of pegging early on in life instead of during your first prostste exam at 40. 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 23/12/2025My wife: [feeding our cat] here’s your surf and turf. Me: you can also call eating someone’s ass and pussy “surf and turf” My wife: 🙄 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 19/12/2025Nevermore: a Paramore cover band where everyone is dressed as ravens. 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 08/12/2025My latest midlife crisis: a senryu I’m starting a band called Panic! at the Costco; I like savings not tragedies. #comics #costco #emo #dadjoke 010
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 05/12/2025I wanted the cool cyberpunk dystopia, like getting bionic arms and shit, not this current lame ass cyberpunk dystopia where we can die from measles while watching the latest porn sponsored by Polymarket. 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 24/10/2025Back in my day, we used call Fleshlights edge cases and we liked it. 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 05/10/2025My favorite thing about One Battle After Another is how it aligns the worst holiday with white supremacists. 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 04/10/2025Waiting for the inevitable Taylor Swift / Morgan Wallen duet. 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 03/10/2025I’m disappointed that The Life of a Showgirl was not a musical reimagining of the classic 1995 erotic drama Showgirls. #TaylorSwift 010
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 01/10/2025Poets: let’s write poems about the moon. Hades II: let’s nuke people with the moon. 000
Reposted by Jesse Bradley-AmoreWhiskey Tit Press @whiskeytit.com · 18/09/2025@jbradleyamore.bsky.social is coming to Philly— baby's all grown up. Go see! 032
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 06/09/2025Me: [Looking at my hair in the mirror] Christ, I need a haircut. My wife: He can’t help with that. Me: Who…oh. My wife: *jazz hands* 020
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 18/08/2025Me: [after hearing my wife talk about how parents of intersex kids request surgery to make them the gender they want] Ambiguous Genitalia is my new slam poet name. My wife: You should go back to doing poetry slam and do really cringy poems. Me: I already did that in my 20s. 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 15/08/2025When my cat rubs his face on things, it’s adorable. When I rub my face on things at a Best Buy, they call the cops. 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 11/08/2025I stopped writing fiction because I got tired of predicting the future accurately. 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 08/08/2025I injured my hand from playing video games; better than from jerking off. #poetry #poem #poetrycomics #videogames #senryu #haiku #comics #comedy #aging #middleage #middleaged #doodle #doodling #selflove #jerking #masturbation 041
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 02/08/2025It seems like I was running through a lot of your minds because I ran 10 miles today. 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 01/08/2025DeSantis declared today as “Hulk Hogan Day” in Florida. To celebrate, make sure to do some steroids and be casually racist. Don’t forget to end every sentence with “brother”. 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 29/07/2025Can’t wait for that inevitable Sydney Sweeney Isotoner ad where she says “hey, my heil’s are up here.” 010
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 11/07/2025I tried getting into a threesome with a Sith couple. They refused. The Rule of Two I guess also includes what happens in the bedroom. 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 09/07/2025My wife: Could you turn on the light? Me: [Turns on the light]. I had to do it this way because the other way wouldn’t have worked. My wife: What other way? Me: [Looking at the light sexually] “You’ve been a very bad light, haven’t you?” My wife: *shakes her head* 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 08/07/2025Pro-lifers are pro-life until a facehugger uses its proboscis to implant an embryo in them. 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 07/07/2025I get dirty looks from people when they see me wearing a KN95 mask because they think I’m ICE. I correct them by telling them what masked ICE agents really look like: a walking uncircumcised penis with an American flag foreskin tattoo. 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 07/07/2025My solo show, How I Learned (NOT) To Drive, comes to Harrisburg Fringe next week. Get your tickets at howilearnednottodrive.com. 010
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 03/07/2025The great thing about the Big Beautiful Bill is that we’re going to get an American version of the Diary of Anne Frank. 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 03/07/2025Ever wanted to sell your body to pay for your healthcare? Thanks to the Big Beautiful Bill, you soon can. Pay your copays by the pound and feed your fellow poors with your flesh. Mmmm Mmmm. Taste that freedom. 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 02/07/2025Listen up, queers. Pride is over. The only thing you’re allowed to be out and proud about this month is America. I better see you deep throat a glizzy without gagging while a bald eagle watches in a cuck chair made in the USA. 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 30/06/2025I thought we already had an Alligator Alcatraz in Florida. It’s called Gatorland. 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 23/06/2025If I was playing a drinking game based on the “um’s” and “utilized” said in this all hands meeting I’m in, I would be as dead as Dylan Thomas. 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 14/06/2025My 7th grade math teacher, Mrs. Stickler, pulled me aside after class one day. She pointed at my limp wrists and said “you need to work on not walking like that because people might think, y’know?” Jokes on her though because I fucked her husband 27 years later. #pride 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 14/06/2025Why be scared of Friday the 13th when you can be scared every day. #comic #comics #cartoon #cartooning #doodle #doodling #poetry #senryu #haiku #poetrycomics #maha #rfkjr #cdc #vaccines #vaccinessavelives #covid #covid_19 #pandemic #horror #fridaythe13th 020
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 10/06/2025I too would love to be offered enough money to betray my values like CM Punk. 010
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 02/06/2025As I’m about to put my mask on to head into a Kroger: Guy: “Smart man wearing a mask. It’s (COVID) coming back around again.” Me: “It never left.” Guy: “That’s real shit right there.” 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 15/05/2025I’ve been banned for life from Williams Sonoma. I’m disappointed that they turned out to be so vanilla. It’s not my fault that I’m pansexual. 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 04/05/2025May the Forth be with you or something. #maythe4th #maythefourth #maythe4thbewithyou #maytheforcebewithyou #abortionishealthcare #abortions #abortionaccess #plannedparenthood #starwars #sith 010
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 01/05/2025It’s Gonna Be May. #comic #comics #cartoon #cartooning #doodle #doodling #poets #poem #nationalpoetrymonth #poetry #april #may #meme 030
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 19/04/2025My love, We celebrated the second day of American Jesus’s stand against his betrayers by playing paintball. I drew the bullet that blessed me to be American Jesus You’ll be proud to know all the shots I made were to the face, unlike the Jesus everyone else in the world celebrates. #tradewarletters 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 18/04/2025Apparently it’s National Anal Sex Day. However, it feels like that every day under the Trump Administration because we’re all getting fucked. 010
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 17/04/2025Based on that Roman Reigns interview, I feel like we might get our first “loser gets kidnapped to a different country” match in the WWE. 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 14/04/2025White men do extreme sports because it’s the only way they experience existential fear. Everyone else experiences this the old fashioned way: merely existing. 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 08/04/2025Dearest husband, We watched people get raptured today back to where they belonged. “Why isn’t it happening to us,” our son asked. “Because America is already Heaven,” I said. We celebrated by offering American Jesus spent bullet casings. #tradewar #tradewarletters #vss #project2025 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 05/04/2025I’m gonna start a charity called Make a Wish but instead of granting wishes, it would grant kids the chance to remake Nine Inch Nails’s “Wish”. 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 16/03/2025Here’s me doing my best Dom Toretto impression to get you to come see my solo show, How I Learned (NOT) To Drive at @pghfringe March 27-29. Use the link in my bio to get your tickets. #PGHFringe #PGHFringe25 #PittsburghFringe #PittsburghFringe25 #FringeFestivals #Pittsburgh #PittsburghPensylvania 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 14/03/2025I am doing my solo show tonight for FREE at Breakthrough Theatre. RSVP using this link: www.eventbrite.com/e/how-i-lear... #orlando #winterpark #theatre #soloshow #orlandofringe #fringefestival #oviedoeventbrite.comHow I Learned (Not) To Drive - Solo Show Filming (FREE)Can a 40-year-old man with a learner's permit save his marriage by finally conquering his fear of the open road? 010
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 12/03/2025My love, Our fearless leader offered our squad the right to purchase cars made by his junkmancer. “We must each buy one to make American Jesus proud,” our squad leader said. “But my family will starve,” Private Jones said. Those were his last words. #tradewarletters2025 #vss #tesla 010
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 12/03/2025My love, Today, our son came out as wanting to be a bullet. I asked him: “Why not a gun?” “The bullet is how American Jesus was purified on the cross. A gun is just a hammer.” We celebrated his new identity with ice cream and target practice. #tradewarletters2025 #vss #tradewars #canada 010
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 08/03/2025Dearest husband, Our son built a diorama of his school to practice destroying ideas he disagrees with. “What will you learn from the ruins,” I asked him. “How to be a winner even when I’m the only one left.” #tradewarletters2025 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 06/03/2025My love, We infected ourselves today with American Jesus’s latest blessing. He’s asked for a new family because He’s bored and lonely and we always do what He wants. Our throats are raw from all this coughing but we can still say Amen. #tradewarletters2025 #measles #measlesoutbreak 000
Jesse Bradley-Amore @jbradleyamore.bsky.social · 05/03/2025My love, Our son learned the value of betrayal today. He told the police about witnessing a woman stealing a pregnancy test at the dollar store. The police rewarded our son by promising him he can name the child the woman will give birth to in prison. #tradewarletters2025 000