Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 29/09/2026These days Sheena is branch secretary of her local W.I. 050
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 28/09/2026I once caught Jay Z staring at me and asked if he had a problem. That was a fucking mistake. 020
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 27/09/2026Young people, do you ever feel so tired that the simplest of things seem too much effort? That’s what middle-age feels like. You’re welcome. 140
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 26/09/2026One of my silly friends reckons I should buy a thesaurus. What a silly idea! Why would I want a silly thesaurus? 260
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 25/09/2026Hunting, but with the dogs ripping to pieces anyone wearing a riding hat and red coat. 030
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 24/09/2026Someone gave me a book about anger management. I lost it. 0102
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 24/09/2026I'm - it's now a long sigh before I get to my year of birth in drop-down menus - years old. 110
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 23/09/2026My drama about The Red Arrows has been commissioned by ITV3. We hope to start filming a pilot in November. 170
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 23/09/2026WHAT DO WE WANT? SAFER OVERHEAD LETTER FIXINGS! WHEN DO WE WANT THEM? OW! 040
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 23/09/2026Sadly, I found the definitive way to decide whether you want children or not is to have some. 170
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 22/09/2026My wife keeps saying I look better without glasses. It wouldn’t bother me but she’s the one who wears them. 070
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 22/09/2026When you’ve loaded the dishwasher to your wife’s liking. 050
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 22/09/2026I'll never forget grandad's last words to me: "What bus?" 170
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 21/09/2026I've had no alcohol for seven days. I've learnt two things from this: 1. I'm not dependant on alcohol. 😊 2. Life's fucking dull without alcohol. 😔 141
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 21/09/2026Daddy bear: My porridge is too hot! Mummy bear: My porridge is too cold! Baby bear: Bacon tastes great hot or cold... just saying. 4625
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 20/09/2026Things my wife thinks you can't have too many of: Candles Shoes Cushions Tupperware containers Skin creams Past grievances 071
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 20/09/2026I suspected my ex-wife had Tourette's, but it turned out that she just hated me that much. 070
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 18/09/2026I'm fairly sure I could be happy if I didn't drink beer. But it's not worth taking the chance, right? 151
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 18/09/2026I always think it's a great shame Wall's Magnums don't have chocolate moustaches. 020
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 18/09/2026The inventor of Sainsbury's basics toilet paper, Arthur Fingerthrew, has died. #RIP 190
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 17/09/2026Apparently, responding "mostly cunts" is considered "offensive and unhelpful" when asked to describe colleagues in a team building exercise. 041
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 17/09/2026I bought the Metallica range of paint brushes. The largest is far too big and makes a terrible mess, but nothing else splatters. 010
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 17/09/2026I know far too many people who like to “make a long story short”, but fail every fucking time. 030
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 17/09/2026I have IBS like my mum and grandmother. Runs in the family. 070
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 16/09/2026Don't be cruel and ignore people. Let them know where they stand and just tell them to fuck off. 061
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 16/09/2026“I was told my grandad served on a mimesweeper during the war.” "Shouldn't that be a minesweeper?" “I don't know, he'd never talk about it.” 151
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 16/09/2026I’m having a crisis because I’m now too old for my midlife crisis. 230
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 16/09/2026The Ra Ra skirt was designed by Rasputin, lover of the Russian Queen. 191
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 15/09/2026If the schooldays were the best days of your life, you really are doing life wrong. 160
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 15/09/2026I like most birds but I think the thrush is an irritating twat. 250
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 14/09/2026I'm - our school toilet paper was so shiny you could end up with skid marks up to your shoulder blades - years old. 020
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 14/09/2026I've started an anal bleaching business. Give me a ring if you're interested. 1101
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 14/09/2026I sat in a Newcastle pub yesterday afternoon wearing running gear and a tinfoil cape while strangers bought me beer. Works every year. 😉🍻 181
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 13/09/2026Someone should do something about my inability to take responsibility. 010
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 11/09/2026Pretend you're in the 'Thriller' video by visiting a Wetherspoons at 11am. 052
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 11/09/2026Snow Patrol’s Gary Lightbody was blown away when he found out I was a big fan. 161
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 10/09/2026You say potato, I say potato. You say tomato, I say tomato. You say aluminum and I beat you to death with an Oxford English Dictionary. 040
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 10/09/2026I once took a Lidl bag for life into Waitrose. I think they would've been less horrified if I'd got my cock out. 190
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 09/09/2026I'll never forget the day I realised the words joking and choking sound very similar. I miss grandad. 080
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 09/09/2026All free men have the right to purchase chocolate covered ice cream on a stick. - The Magnum Carta. 061
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 09/09/2026I bought a Citroen Oxo. It's like the Saxo, but built for stock car racing. 2121
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 08/09/2026When you’ve loaded the dishwasher to your wife’s liking. 082
Ian Power @ihpower.bsky.social · 08/09/2026This is your regular reminder that you are only responsible for what you post, not what the replier understands. 010
