Garry Myrwold @honeybunny123.bsky.social · 23/11/2024Families should be able to trade people, just like professional sports teams. 000
Garry Myrwold @honeybunny123.bsky.social · 23/11/2024The first time I see a jogger smiling, I’ll consider doing it. 000
Garry Myrwold @honeybunny123.bsky.social · 23/11/2024There are only two types of honest people in this world.....small children and drunk people. 000
Garry Myrwold @honeybunny123.bsky.social · 23/11/2024I wish I could Google "things to eat in my fridge" so I wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed. 000
Garry Myrwold @honeybunny123.bsky.social · 22/11/2024Yawning is the body`s way of saying `10% Battery Remaining`. 000
Garry Myrwold @honeybunny123.bsky.social · 22/11/2024You mean to tell me people run? On purpose? When nobody is chasing them? 000
Garry Myrwold @honeybunny123.bsky.social · 22/11/2024Do you realize that a woman`s "I`ll be ready in five minutes." and a guy`s " I`ll be home in five minutes." are exactly the same? 000
Garry Myrwold @honeybunny123.bsky.social · 22/11/2024You don’t truly know someone until you see how they react to their bag of chips getting stuck in a vending machine. 000
Garry Myrwold @honeybunny123.bsky.social · 21/11/2024You don`t get to complain about life until you move out of your parent`s house. 000
Garry Myrwold @honeybunny123.bsky.social · 21/11/2024Sometimes I`ll catch my reflection in a mirror and I`ll be like, "oh no, that can`t be right." 000
Garry Myrwold @honeybunny123.bsky.social · 21/11/2024Is it rude to throw a breath-mint in someone`s mouth while they are talking? 000
Garry Myrwold @honeybunny123.bsky.social · 21/11/2024Hate having friends? Just chew with your mouth open. 000
Garry Myrwold @honeybunny123.bsky.social · 20/11/2024Such a relief when things I`ve been meaning to do become things I meant to do but now it`s too late. 000
Garry Myrwold @honeybunny123.bsky.social · 20/11/2024I`ve eaten enough chinese food in my day that my fortune cookies have started to contradict one another. 000
Garry Myrwold @honeybunny123.bsky.social · 20/11/2024I`m not sure if I actually have free time or there are things I`m forgetting to do. 000
Garry Myrwold @honeybunny123.bsky.social · 20/11/2024There aren`t enough love songs about the moment you see your luggage appear at baggage claim. 000
Garry Myrwold @honeybunny123.bsky.social · 20/11/2024When someone tells me how old their kid is in months, I ask them to rephrase it in days, so they know what I just went through. 000
Garry Myrwold @honeybunny123.bsky.social · 19/11/2024FACT: The "sometimes you feel like a nut, sometimes you don`t" is not really a good defense in court. 000
Garry Myrwold @honeybunny123.bsky.social · 19/11/2024Sometimes it’s just better to buy new Tupperware than to risk opening the leftovers. 000
Garry Myrwold @honeybunny123.bsky.social · 19/11/2024If there wasn´t a last minute I´d never get anything done. 000
Garry Myrwold @honeybunny123.bsky.social · 19/11/2024I’m cutting the sleeves off my Snuggie because it makes me look more badass. 000
Garry Myrwold @honeybunny123.bsky.social · 18/11/2024Note to Self: These Note to Selves don’t work. 000
Garry Myrwold @honeybunny123.bsky.social · 18/11/2024I’m in big trouble if my coworkers find out that I really don’t have Tourette’s. 000
Garry Myrwold @honeybunny123.bsky.social · 18/11/2024No matter how old you are, If a little kid shoots you with a toy gun, you pretend to die. 000
Garry Myrwold @honeybunny123.bsky.social · 18/11/2024We should`ve let the guy who named oranges keep naming other stuff. 041
