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Chris Tannhauser

@hivegod.bsky.social
405 followers 127 following 610 posts

finger firmly on the pulse of the void author of SCREAMS LIKE MEAT 🤖🍖

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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 2h
the most unfortunate definition of love
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 5h
#dreams
I’m in art class, and the group project ideas are stupid.  And not stupid-cool, either.  I throw out an offhand option and, surprisingly, the entire class agrees we should do it:

We build a sturdy box of wood, big as a dinner table and tall enough that the average man has to go on tippy-toes to look inside.  We place the box, unpainted, in the center of the gallery space where patrons of the arts wander with glasses of wine and fat wallets.  We then stage a fake mass shooting, and we bar the door, against which the fake shooter rails and bangs.  We encourage everyone to hide in the box, and the art part is where we see how they cooperate (or not) to climb inside, how they pack themselves so everyone can fit, and how they manage the single leftover little girl (who’s in on the performance).  Will they shift and contort to make space?  Or just pile her on top where she will surely give them away?  The door splinters and the madman enters—

Various x-ray machines snap images of the box so we can later review the tangle of skeletons in detail.
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 6h
oh shit it’s actually from 2000
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 6h
From waaay back in ‘08, Minus Love & Deadward in
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
We had a dinner party where I put it on repeat to see how long it would take for anyone to notice; somewhere during the seventh go someone finally piped up.
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
But what if I brought two straws?
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
all I really want at my funeral is for the vocalist to say “guitar” just before the face-melting solo
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Reposted by Chris Tannhauser
Eize Basa @eizebasa.baby · 30/09/2025
Tomorrow is October 1st, a great time to start reading Roger Zelazny's excellent A NIGHT IN THE LONESOME OCTOBER! There's a short chapter for every day of the month, like a literary Halloween advent calendar. It's a charming supernatural mystery told from a dog's POV.
Illustration for the cover of A NIGHT IN THE LONESOME OCTOBER
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
“American cultural output? Drill baby, drill! It's Sheridan time!” That one stung like a Vaseline® face slap.
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Today was feeling samey until I remembered this existed
m.youtube.com
Sigue Sigue Sputnik - Love Missile F1 11 (Official HD Video)
YouTube video by Sigue Sigue Sputnik Official
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Slipstream is when the Tastemakers™ declare that a story about a ghost robot has literary merit.
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Reposted by Chris Tannhauser
Jennifer O'Toole @cellsdividing.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
You're free!
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
the future is stupid
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Currently enjoying My Gifts Are Hungry!
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Reposted by Chris Tannhauser
Here, the ghost is me. @highway62.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
*Duke Nukeum voice* Come get some.
My setup for the Sinister Book Fair.
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Who could have guessed that survival of the species was a team sport?
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
C’mon Dangle! C’MON DANGLE!!!
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
Torrey Pines State Beach
San Diego, California
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
Which beach? (Resident San Diegan here.)
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
Share the last 4 TTRPGs you played and expose your gaming habits (do it, it’s like flexing and spitting bullets out of gunshot wounds) Traveller (Classic) Eat the Reich DCC Dying Earth Cyberpunk 2070* *homebrew
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
We have a sack of severed heads, silent, heavy, unwieldy. When we get the angel’s head—golden-haired and halo-plucked, with an unending snarl—someone throws it in with the rest where its thrashing and seeping resurrects the entire mass into a chorus of wailing. #dreams
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Reposted by Chris Tannhauser
Johan Nohr @nohr.se · 15/09/2026
Talked so another dad at the kids’ climbing today. We got along fine talking about old Swedish roleplaying games and heavy metal. Really clicked. Then he told me he was listening to some kind of audiobook/graphic novel story made entirely by ai, so I kicked him in the dick and everyone applauded.
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Happy Breakaway Day! With special recognition for the episode that put a big dent in my childhood…
Space: 1999 S1 E4 “Dragon’s Domain” — NEVER SLEEPING AGAIN
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
Well, the Appalachians *are* older than bones, so they’re nubbed down considerable.
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
This is who I’m hiring for my next book cover, no contest.
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
Last four characters you saved on your phone are your D&D party
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
It was an eye-opener, that’s for sure.
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
That’s seven times. He is not going to be okay.
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
GODDAMMIT
Kamandi, a child, out cold AGAIN
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
It’s not water—it’s wolf piss. Alphas would understand.
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
AI is like drinking from the spittoon.
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
doomthinkequations.blogspot.com
The Doomthink Equations
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
I assured him I could swap out in real time with the best of them, like a Tarantino broadcast edit. "A stuck hatch you say? Well ain't that just a monkey flogger."
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
Just before we were set to record, I asked about profanity—as the adventure had a fuck-ton of swears in it (clean space jockey cosmic horror isn't a thing)—and the host said it was a clean show, one he wanted his nieces and nephews to be able to listen to.
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
They asked me to come back! So I brought The Black Sun Incident, a choose-your-own-adventure joint with five ways to die, only one of which is okay-ish.
scifihappyhour.podbean.com
Ep.049, Guest Chris Tannhauser – Cult Writer. Cosmicism Without Cthulhu: Updating Lovecraftian Dread for a Post-Disclosure World. Body Horror Renaissance. Writing the Scene: The Black Sun Incident | S...
Episode 049. (02:40) Guest Chris Tannhauser – Cult Writer. (16:50) Cosmicism Without Cthulhu: Updating Lovecraftian Dread for a Post-Disclosure World. (53:58) The New Weird's Body Horror Renaissance. ...
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
That’s me snapping approval at the poem above.
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
🫰🫰
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
Same here. I am a time traveller from a dead age.
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
The bookmark is printed with a foil effect, so at the right angle you get weird reflections.
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
Only two chapters in & I’m hooked…
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
PS. FUCK AI
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
makes a slappin’ hand itch
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
New short story! "The Bride’s Prosthetic"—she just needed a little something extra to feel complete… (Content warning: Misogyny, ableism, narrative whiplash.)
doomthinkequations.blogspot.com
The Doomthink Equations
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
the real death of superman
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
Plan a horrorfest using only your first name. Cabin in the Woods Heredity Ritual (The) In the Mouth of Madness Substance (The)
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
New pages—lots of ‘em. Full story in the alt text.
I tend to look at my calendar the way a medieval peasant might: there's stuff that happens every season, there's stuff that happens "in a while", and then there's the blazing now. As you might expect, this gives rise to situations—like when spacetime folded over and I realized that someone horrible had given me two deadlines inside the same week! (Reader, you know that horrible someone was me.)

Now-me figured that future-me could handle this—no problem—so he fucked current-me by reading comics and watching movies and sleeping instead of writing his ass off. As the deadlines loomed I fantasized about getting sick or breaking an arm or just not doing it. In the same way the living envy the dead in apocalyptic scenarios, I envied those hollow saps who lean on AI.

Instead, I made my oblations at alien altars and summoned my muse (the sexy librarian one with the sneer) and had her strap me in. I banged out The Bride's Prosthetic and presented it at a literary salon on Saturday to much acclaim. (Said an author with nine published novels: "One word: Eeew.")

Halfway there. Now all I had to do was finish up a choose-your-own-adventure joint for a podcast on Tuesday, where I'd been invited back because the last time I was on was their most downloaded episode, so no pressure. I mean, it's just a bunch of short paragraphs scattered like one of Burroughs' cut-ups, right? But you have to produce the text, then map it all out and make sure it works, which is a recursive process where the map pushes the paragraphs and the paragraphs push the map and and and... Yeah, it's a nightmare hallway.

Again, fantasies of lost limbs and house fires so I wouldn't be a liar when I let them know I couldn't possibly make it.

But I did. We recorded last night. It was a hit.

It turns out past-me was right, goddammit.
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Chris Tannhauser @hivegod.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
The people who choose to be billionaires shouldn’t be billionaires.
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