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Half Cocked

@halfcockedlaw.bsky.social

696 followers 338 following 9.1K posts

Lawyer. Coffee achiever. Technically not a little person. Husband and sometimes research assistant of @drweevil

Posts Replies Media

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/04/2025

Hey, it's the first funny thing you've ever said. Congratulations.

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Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 18/08/2024

Uhh rizz

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 06/05/2024

Elon and I both want to send Javascript into space, though I want to trap it in the Phantom Zone.

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 06/05/2024

There go the people I must follow them for I am their leader.

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Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 06/05/2024

Bette has a line for that

media.tenor.com

Bette Midler Loveyou GIF

ALT: Bette Midler Loveyou GIF

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Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 06/05/2024

Do you think it will fit in a Honda civic?

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 06/05/2024

media.tenor.com

Bumblebee Bumblebee Dance GIF

ALT: Bumblebee Bumblebee Dance GIF

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Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 06/05/2024

Contracts for Facebook Marketplace: Offer, acceptance, consideration, reconsideration, renegotiation, reacceptance, ghosting

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 05/05/2024

I like the new name of Fort Bragg

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 05/05/2024

Cameo by Tomahawk Cruise

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 05/05/2024

You haven't lived until you've used a depleted uranium driver.

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 05/05/2024

I believe he's confusing Kendrick for Dr. Dre.

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

Passive voice will take credit in a statement later

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Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

They've got the full commando cosplay outfit. Tactical helmet, fisher-tikes radio, plate carrier with rifle mags.

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Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

Welcome. You've got mail.

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

Concerning

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

Peter is sympathetic because he's also familiar with being iced out because he writes shitty stories

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

Police are committing crime: we need them to remain cops

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

I guess nostr got boring, too.

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

"Protestors need to come up with a coherent message." "Why are protestors designating certain people to talk about their message?“

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

His mistake wasn't being a pedophile, it was being a gay pedophile.

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

A protestor politely declined to talk to me. Here's 2000 words about it.

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

Saw a video titled "chiropractor works on wild lion" I am disappointed to report that they were not eaten.

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

Writing on the trash can.

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Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

Ah, didn't count on a hospital having a paint shop. Don't know why but it's always government places that use that stencil.

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Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

Jail?

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Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

You want to go full?

media.tenor.com

ALT: Gamecocks GIF

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

I also suggest the plinkett review. And commentary. And other redlettermedia webzones.

Harry S. Plinkett he's fat and a serial killer. And he wants to know if you want a pizza roll.

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

They forgot New York is Eastern Time.

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

Have you tried sleeping? I hear it works for some people.

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Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

I think he meant phyllo-semolinic. Like Galaktoboureko.

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

Start a makeup tutorial channel on insta.

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

You might like Dennis Chambers reacting to Schism, too. youtu.be/rVwyAsU4dus

Dennis Chambers Hears TOOL For The First Time

What if funk/fusion drummer Dennis Chambers was the drummer for Tool? (Don’t tell Danny Carey.)Dennis is known for his legendary backbeat and funky style. So...

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

"She looks like a prepubescent child, but she's actually 900 years old."

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Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

"I'm only a fictional pedophile."

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Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

"I admire the Jews"

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ALT: "Bravo." GIF

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

Don't believe his lies. Where's his other clopper?

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

Blame whoever did gif integration. And ask him if they can get around to video integration.

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

The gif results for clop are on point

media.tenor.com

Phasmophobia Ghost Orbs GIF

ALT: Phasmophobia Ghost Orbs GIF

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

My wife knows I have a deadline a few days away if there's a sudden uptick in vacuuming and mopping.

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

If that was the point you were trying to make, you ate shit.

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

So who's the poor bastard on the can?

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Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

Guy Leeroy Jenkins'd his way to the appellate courts before you could get there.

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

It's not good bourbon, but it meets the requirements. If I'm picking for myself, I'll take Blanton's or E.H. Taylor, but I'll drink anything decent.

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

It's bourbon if it's 51% corn and aged 6 months in charred new oak barrels, distilled up to 160 proof, and bottled between 80 and 150. Jack meets that, even if it isn't from Kentucky.

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

For once, I agree with the NYPD. The students must be stopped. Proust is awful.

Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

Seriously, the next time you feel like taking a dump, use a toilet.

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Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

Texas needs the power to regulate the abortion laws of other states. Just like it has the right to have its own internet, immigration, and speech lawsm

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Half Cocked @halfcockedlaw.bsky.social · 04/05/2024

Oh, waffles that I don't like, either?

media.tenor.com

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ALT: Tsoukalas Malakia GIF

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