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Haldan

@haldan.bsky.social
643 followers 2K following 40 posts

lawyer, world destroyer. aka boody 🐡

PostsRepliesMedia
Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 09/07/2025
Iris, 3: your nipple looks like ice cream
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Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 23/05/2025
Iris: can I lick the toothpaste a little? Her mom: no, you already licked it a little. Iris: no, I licked it *a lot.* Her mom: ok, you can lick it a little.
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Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 08/05/2025
Iris, 3: Help me! Take my pants off, I need to eat some water.
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Reposted by Haldan
Alison Fisk @alisonfisk.bsky.social · 25/12/2024
An ancient and magical amber bear. Carved some 10,000 years ago, it washed up on a beach at Fanø in Denmark from a submerged Mesolithic settlement under the North Sea. ✨Merry Christmas everyone✨ National Museum of Denmark 📷 by me #Archaeology
Figurine of an amber bear carved some 10,000 years ago during the Mesolithic period. The bear is seen in profile facing right. The legs are incomplete. The ears, muzzle and mouth are depicted. The figurine is displayed on a small metal stand. The display lighting shining on the bear’s head and neck enhances the translucence of the  orange coloured amber
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Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 21/04/2025
Iris, 3: I got my knives when I was a baby, from a police man, and that’s how I learned to talk.
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Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 31/03/2025
@flysas.com your website and app have both been giving me a system error when I try to book. I’ve tried on three different devices—it’s been doing this for the past 2 hours. I’ve also been on hold with customer service for almost the same amount of time. Are calls still being answered?
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Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 21/03/2025
Wife, to our newborn: you have a little bit of bellybutton on your penis, which is a sentence I never thought I’d say
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Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 14/03/2025
I would upgrade my iPhone immediately if Apple Intelligence was able to effectively identify political texts and block them all automatically
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Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 08/03/2025
Me: what do you want to be when you grow up? Iris: gum. Me, confused: what’s gum? Iris, impatient: it’s like food.
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Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 03/03/2025
Iris: I love chewing tweety bird’s eyes
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Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 03/03/2025
Iris pronounces playground as “pain ground”
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Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 01/03/2025
So is succession ultimately just a show about how being rich is kinda boring?
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Reposted by Haldan
Terra Field @rainofterra.gay · 24/02/2025
The public comment period for changing passports to misgender trans people is open. Please take a moment to let them know that you do not support that change.
federalregister.gov
30-Day Notice of Proposed Information Collection: Application for a U.S. Passport
The Department of State has submitted the information collection described below to the Office of Management and Budget (OMB) for approval. In accordance with the Paperwork Reduction Act of 1995, we are requesting comments on these collections from all interested individuals and organizations....
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Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 12/02/2025
Olaf’s “When I’m Older” from Frozen II = Rodgers & Hammerstein’s “Maria” + Björk’s “Oh So Quiet” + Who Wants to be a Millionaire sound FX.
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Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 07/02/2025
Samsung comprises 22%+ of South Korea’s GDP, and has the 5th strongest brand value on earth. Nonetheless it has for years had a website that is essentially nonfunctional. 🤷🏽‍♂️
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Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 07/02/2025
Augustina A. always be purchasing
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Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 02/02/2025
Ah yes the real world/road rules challenge —> US secretary of transportation pipeline
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Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 20/01/2025
[playing picnic] Me: ooh, edamame! Iris: eda-my mom?
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Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 17/01/2025
There’s so much to admire about David Lynch, but it should be noted that the man had maybe the best head of hair on earth
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Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 03/01/2025
One song I get stuck in my head sometimes is that meme collage of Jason Derulo singing his own name over and over again
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Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 29/12/2024
Are all the sex bots on bluesky named Camilla?
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Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 27/12/2024
Watching peaky blinders is a great way to get back into smoking cigarettes
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Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 26/12/2024
Hey before the end of the year is a great time to donate a few dollars to @wikipedia.bsky.social since it’s the best website ever and operates on a shoestring.
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Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 16/12/2024
Iris: I like ketchup on my Hot God
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Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 15/12/2024
I’d bet Ben would be making great music right now
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Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 13/12/2024
Fatherhood is holding Santa’s legs apart so your daughter can clean poop off his butt
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Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 13/12/2024
Iris went to Disney on Ice and came home with “Olaf knockers”
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Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 11/12/2024
Just realizing that Pharrell’s and Chad’s use of the name The Neptunes may have been a Jabberjaw/Hanna-Barbera reference? en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jabberjaw
en.m.wikipedia.org
Jabberjaw - Wikipedia
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Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 11/12/2024
What is it about parenthood that makes me refer to myself in the third person
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Reposted by Haldan
Soraya Nadia McDonald @soraya.press · 08/12/2024
"There is no single regulator for a private health-insurance company, even when it is found to be violating the law. For United’s practices to be curbed, mental-health advocates told ProPublica, every single jurisdiction in which it operates would have to successfully bring a case against it."
From the New Yorker

At the same time that news was breaking about the NaviHealth algorithm, the company was fighting—ultimately unsuccessfully—a court decision that it had acted “arbitrarily and capriciously” in repeatedly denying coverage of long-term residential treatment to a middle-school-age girl who repeatedly attempted suicide, and has since died by suicide. Several years ago, government investigators found that UnitedHealth had used algorithms to identify mental-health-care providers who they believed were treating patients too often; these identified therapists would typically receive a call from a company “care advocate” who would question them and then cut off reimbursements. Though some states have ruled this practice illegal, it remains in play across the country. There is no single regulator for a private health-insurance company, even when it is found to be violating the law. For United’s practices to be curbed, mental-health advocates told ProPublica, every single jurisdiction in which it operates would have to successfully bring a case against it.

Thompson’s murder is one symptom of the American appetite for violence; his line of work is another.
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Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 07/12/2024
I put on Iris’s current fav movie yesterday morning (Scoob), and she flipped out yelling that she needed “yellow scoob.” I frantically flipped through the movie trying to find whatever part she was asking for as she got more and more upset. It turned out she needed the Warner Bros intro sequence.
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Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 06/12/2024
Iris: “ima build a snowman with a butt *and* a gina”
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Ken Klippenstein @kenklippenstein.bsky.social · 29/11/2024
Mark Zuckerborg , got em
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Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 02/11/2023
I get my dinner mints from tractor supply
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im here now @nicebigdog.bsky.social · 25/08/2023
I think my big problem is I have a lot of hobbies and not a lot of time and a brain that makes that the most unbearable sensation in the world
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Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 24/08/2023
Having a toddler makes for thunderdome dinners
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Haldan @haldan.bsky.social · 24/08/2023
Sure
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