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Haiku Alibi

@haiku-alibi.bsky.social
453 followers 87 following 549 posts

Goddamn radical lefty humanist, as is only reasonable. We only get a short ride on the rock. Look out for each other.

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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 28/05/2026
Rapist Uses Power to Violate Woman Who Dared to Fight Back There are exactly zero other valid interpretations. And NYT is fucking holding the dildo with this down the middle headline. There is no middle. Fucking cowards and traitors to their stated profession.
nytimes.com
Justice Dept. Is Said to Open Criminal Inquiry of E. Jean Carroll, Who Accused Trump of Rape
Ms. Carroll, who prevailed in a civil trial after accusing President Trump of sexual abuse, is the latest target in a Justice Department campaign going after his perceived enemies.
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 30/04/2026
This crystallizes the driving force behind the corrupt SC majority. They aren't pro-MAGA, they are anti-democracy. Weakening enfranchisement and institutions at the behest of their "sponsors" to grease the transition to neo-feudalism. November is coming. www.nytimes.com/live/2026/04...
NYT: Supreme Court Updates: Justices Further Weaken Voting Rights Act, Igniting Political Scramble

The court’s conservative majority said it had upheld the landmark law, as liberal justices accused the court of gutting the act. In striking down a Louisiana voting map as a racial gerrymander, the court opened the door for other states to redraw maps.
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 29/04/2026
Altman and Musk scrumming over who gets to be the bigger douchebag. A pox on both their houses. www.nytimes.com/2026/04/28/t...
NYT: OpenAI Trial Starts With Two Very Different Tales of a Company’s Early Years

In the trial’s first day of testimony, Elon Musk said greed led co-founder Sam Altman to pull the A.I. lab away from its nonprofit roots. OpenAI says that’s nonsense.
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 15/04/2026
My eyelids are doing the WTF flutter so hard I'm going to pull a hamstring. Where do you even start with something like this? November is coming.
nytimes.com
Vance Says Pope Leo Should Be More Careful When Talking About Theology
The vice president, who is Catholic, took issue with Pope Leo XIV’s statement that disciples of Christ are “never on the side of those who once wielded the sword and today drop bombs.”
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 10/04/2026
These clowns couldn't pour piss out of a boot if the instructions were on the heel, but we have to go to extraordinary lengths to combat their continuous, casual, abusive stupidity. The First Amendment is a thing. The Epstein files won't go away. November is coming.
nytimes.com
Judge Rejects Hegseth’s Second Attempt to Restrict Reporters at Pentagon
A federal judge gutted a set of rules that were adopted after the court declared an earlier press policy unconstitutional, in a case brought by The New York Times.
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 09/04/2026
What the hell are they going to do? Send SEAL Team 6 on a Popenapping? It's like these fucksticks never met a stupid idea they didn't like. The Epstein files are still waiting. November is coming.
newrepublic.com
Pentagon Threatened the Pope After He Criticized Trump
It was so bad that Pope Leo changed his plans to travel to the U.S.
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 07/04/2026
Dumpster Don didn't know you can't step out of your kiddie pool, take a massive shit on your neighbor's slip-n-slide and go back to your wallowing in peace. Said neighbor will accost you with a garden implement, and there's no ignoring their outrage because you're bored and have moved on.
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 04/04/2026
The official Jesus team boosters say your cheers suck, Kegsbreath. Take your moldy pom-poms and go home. November is coming.
nytimes.com
Hegseth Says U.S. Troops Are Fighting for Jesus. The Pope Disagrees.
In sharp contrast to the Trump administration’s calls for Christian prayers for the war effort, Pope Leo XIV says military domination is “entirely foreign to the way of Jesus Christ.”
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 02/04/2026
@scoundrel2.bsky.social My dollar was also on the "knows too much to be fired" square. Theirs was on "she'll never talk because her knowledge is so guilty she'd end up in the cell next to his". These chuds are getting fired for failing to please Shitler, not for being awful. November is coming.
nytimes.com
Trump Administration Live Updates: Bondi Fired as Attorney General
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 02/04/2026
Where to even start? * Protecting a guilty pedophile and satisfying calls for transparency are mutually incompatible goals * Oh, right, she's a sociopath who works for a pedophile who's going to bus-toss her? 🎻 November is coming.
nytimes.com
How Pam Bondi’s Missteps on the Epstein Files Jeopardized Her Job
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 30/03/2026
Oh, look, actual journalism. Can you even call it regulatory capture when the regulator runs toward industry with open arms, tongue extended? November is coming.
nytimes.com
From Foe to Ally: The S.E.C. Is Now Writing Crypto-Friendly Policies
The embrace of crypto by financial regulators under President Trump has entered a new, cozier phase.
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 29/03/2026
Controlling internal travel is a key requirement for maintaining fascist control. November is coming.
nytimes.com
ICE May Remain at Airports Even After T.S.A. Pay Resumes, Border Czar Says
Transportation safety officers are set to be paid on Monday, but Tom Homan, the White House’s border czar, said ICE agents may stay where there are shortages.
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 27/03/2026
"Allegations". Bigot is as bigot does. November is coming.
NYT:
Hegseth Strikes Two Black and Two Female Officers From Promotion List

Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth’s highly unusual decision to remove officers from a one-star promotion list has spurred allegations of racial and gender bias.
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 23/03/2026
Stationing goons people are used to seeing armed and masked in airports? Sure, why not? Henchmen uniforms that hide faces is only a trope for gaping security holes in fiction. Good thing there's no countries mad at us for some weird reason who might like to exploit that. November is coming.
cnn.com
Live updates: ICE agents deployed to airports as TSA wait times grow | CNN
Immigration and Customs Enforcement agents are heading to 13 airports today to help with crowd management as travelers at some airports wait in hours-long security lines amid the DHS shutdown. Follow ...
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 20/03/2026
So the Islamic State isn't bad in *principle*, only in *specifics*. Got it. November is coming.
NYT:
Hegseth Invokes Divine Purpose to Justify Military Might

Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth has imbued U.S. military actions with a Christian moral underpinning that suggests they are divinely sanctioned.
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 20/03/2026
Nazis eat their own. When it cracks, the whole structure will come unglued as they rush to turn on each other. 🍿 November is coming.
bbc.com
Joe Kent: Former counter-terrorism head under FBI investigation over alleged leaks
The former counter-terrorism head resigned on Tuesday over the war with Iran, saying the country posed "no imminent threat" to the US.
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 19/03/2026
Only Dear Leader knows the truth. November. November. November.
NYT: On Iran, Gabbard Turned Intelligence Duties Over to Trump

Tulsi Gabbard, the director of national intelligence, was left to square the president’s comments about an imminent nuclear threat from Iran with a letter from one of her trusted aides.
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 17/03/2026
Called this back in January. ICE operational budget will be the last thing to suffer in the DHS shutdown, regardless of what it takes. They'll shut down JFK, LaGuardia, and SFO before letting the brown shirts feel the pinch. Be sure to give Schumer a Bronx cheer next time you see him. November...
reuters.com
Some small US airports may have to shut due to TSA absences, official says
Some small U.S. airports may have to shut due to a shortage of ​security screeners if a government funding impasse continues, a senior Trump administration ‌official said on Tuesday.
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 14/03/2026
"Begs", BBC, the verb is "begs". The Trumpstein Files are still a thing. November is coming.
bbc.com
Trump urges UK and others to send ships to help secure Strait of Hormuz after Iranian attacks - live updates
Meanwhile, Israel says Iran has launched a sixth wave of strikes on Saturday and in Kuwait, an air base has been hit by two drones.
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 13/03/2026
"...but I'm helping Putin a lot. Because I'm the bigliest traitor in the highliest office ever. No one can trait like me. I'm just the best." November, November, November.
bbc.com
Trump says Putin may be helping Iran 'a bit' as war continues
In an interview, Trump acknowledged that the US is also helping Ukraine's government fight Russia.
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 12/03/2026
They surged despite promises from the US? It's... it's almost like they don't trust the US government! How could this possibly be?
NYT:
Iran War Live Updates: Oil Tops $100 a Barrel as Attacks Spread Across Middle East

[[Global oil prices surged despite pledges from the United States and other countries to release reserves]]. Airstrikes shook Beirut and Tehran, and more ships were attacked in the Persian Gulf.
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 11/03/2026
Long article, worth the read. This ain't going away.
bbc.com
Epstein had two key aides - why do they still control his money and secrets?
Richard Kahn and Darren Indyke administer Epstein’s estate - court filings allege complicity in his crimes.
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 11/03/2026
I don't even know where to start here. Miscalculated implies any calculation at all, which ain't what happened. They just started 💩💩ing munitions and hoped for an outcome aligned with their aims. Spoiler alert: it wasn't freedom, justice, or a 1/2 price Happy Meal November is coming.
NYT: How Trump and His Advisers Miscalculated Iran’s Response to War

In the lead-up to the U.S.-Israeli attack, President Trump downplayed the risks to the energy markets as a short-term concern that should not overshadow the mission to decapitate the Iranian regime.
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 10/03/2026
Remember this? When Schumer and Dem Senate leadership had the leverage to demand real changes on the ground and then pissed it away? I wonder if we'd be in the middle of an illegal shit show of a war right now if those Vichy Senators had actually held the fucking line.
politico.com
Senate passes $1.2T government funding deal — but a brief shutdown is certain
With the House not voting until Monday, the Pentagon and most domestic agencies are set to shutter briefly.
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 09/03/2026
The "lalalala everything is normal" crew are writing the war news. Quoting incoherent, data-free babble and covering it as if it were an acceptable statement of unremarkable quality is collaboration. It is already a hard year and will get harder, but this is the year we topple the regime.
NYT:
Here’s the latest.

Oil prices fell and U.S. stocks rose Monday afternoon, after President Trump told CBS News that the U.S.-Israeli war against Iran “is very complete, pretty much.”

Mr. Trump, who had predicted a duration of four or five weeks, said in a phone interview with the CBS reporter Weijia Jiang, “We’re very far ahead of schedule.”

His comments appeared to ease market fears of a prolonged war, and the resulting oil price spike and trade disruptions, that could badly wound the global economy. The international benchmark oil price, which had topped $90 on Friday, briefly jumped to almost $120, then fell after the Group of 7 wealthy nations said they were considering intervening to bring prices down, and fell again after Mr. Trump’s remarks, ending the day below $90.

The war has all but halted ship traffic through the Strait of Hormuz, the conduit for about one-fifth of the world’s oil.
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 09/03/2026
So... Fallout is going to slide from fiction to documentary just like Idiocracy did?
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 08/03/2026
www.forbes.com/sites/simone... I wonder if Jax is going to update her lyrics. She'd do a great job ripping him (another) new one. youtu.be/F9K5IS-inHs?...
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 07/03/2026
A journalist won the arm wrestling match for the one. Noem wasn't fired for the things that will get her an economy ticket to The Hague. It was for mildly discomfiting her boss. The midterms cometh. Tick tock, motherfuckers.
nytimes.com
Kristi Noem Survived Many Crises. Then She Crossed a Trump Red Line.
President Trump, who values loyalty, has at times tried to distance himself from his administration’s own actions when they become politically toxic.
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 05/03/2026
And because of blocked funding ICE had to cease operations, right? Not so much. Sentate Dems separating DHS from the rest of the budget when they had the leverage to shut it all down was collaboration and they fucking knew it. Schumer isn't ineffective. He's executing his shitty intent perfectly.
NYT: Senate Democrats Block D.H.S. Funding Again Over Enforcement Guardrails

For the third time, a bill to fund the Department of Homeland Security failed as Democrats refused to support the money without new restrictions on federal immigration agents.
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 04/03/2026
Is it just me or is this fucking ghoulish? Why not do an entire series on conflict investment with a spreadsheet of trading moves in columns divided by displaced and dead? Necessary for protecting retirement accounts, blah blah. Fine, let specialty publications cover it. Mother fucking assholes.
NYT: Strategies
The Best Playbook for Investing During a War Is Usually Doing Nothing
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 04/03/2026
Too little, too late, shitbird. You showed exactly what your values were and people responded. FAFO. The tide of users fleeing OpenAI actually caused overload related outages of Anthropic services. They are never coming back.
bbc.com
OpenAI changes deal with US military after backlash
Chief Executive Sam Altman said the group would prohibit the use of its systems to spy on Americans.
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 03/03/2026
We did our tax returns as soon as we had all the paperwork. You may want to do the same, especially if expecting a refund. It would be right on brand for the regime to issue an Apr 10 directive to trigger automatic audits on blue state returns owed a refund and to delay payment until complete.
1040 tax form
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 03/03/2026
Of all the media org failures the most heartbreaking & enraging is NPR. Their both-sidsing and pretending normality didn't save their federal grants. They sacrificed their duty for nothing. They're supposed to be free from corporate influence, yet report like whipped dogs afraid of the burglar.
npr.org
6 U.S. soldiers have been killed as the war with Iran further engulfs the region
The war over Iran engulfed more of the Middle East and beyond on Monday as strikes intensified, Iran-backed groups stepped up attacks and a sixth U.S. service member was killed in action.
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 01/03/2026
The first military casualties of our new quagmire have occurred. When the asymmetric warfare responses arrive on US soil I hope the shitsticks who voted for this are fucking happy. The fall of this regime is coming, and they are running up their tab on the way down.
thestar.com
3 US troops killed and 5 are seriously wounded during Iran attacks, military says
WASHINGTON (AP) — Three American service members have been killed and five others seriously wounded during the U.S. attacks on Iran, the military announced Sunday, marking the first American casualtie...
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 01/03/2026
We told them and we told them and we fucking told them. Now we're entangled in a new Middle East war. An illegal one, even. The chuds who voted for this ("I didn't vote for this!" - yes you did, motherfucker) have collected the whole set of everything they didn't want. Hope they're feeling stupid.
bbc.com
What is happening in Iran? What we know about US-Israel attack and Tehran response
Iran responds by launching missiles and drones towards Israel and four Gulf Arab countries that host US military bases.
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 01/03/2026
They shouldn't be voting on a war powers resolution. That's begging for authority already granted by the Constitution. They should be voting on articles of impeachment. Anything less is acquiesce and collaboration.
NYT: Congress Faces War Powers Votes in Wake of Iran Strikes
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 28/02/2026
Decapitation strikes on foreign governments. Always a sign of a healthy democacy. This won't keep us from pursuing the Trumpstein case and defending voting rights until they're all in fucking prison. The regime is flailing in panic and will continue to until we rip them out by the roots.
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 27/02/2026
Not a word of this is hyperbole. The regime is drowning and will stop at nothing to hold on. This year*will* be painful, but if we keep up the fight, they will fall.
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 26/02/2026
Well that's just what we've all gone to bed hoping for every night. A nuked up North Korea whose Dear Leader might invite ours for a sleepover. Our best hope is that the two narcissistic mole rats just can't stand the smell of each other.
bbc.com
North Korea could 'get along' with US, says Kim Jong Un
Kim said they could get along if the US accepts that Pyongyang's nuclear weapons are here to stay.
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 26/02/2026
I can't tell if it's sane washing or fantasy world denial any more.
NYT:
For Trump, Military Strike in Iran Could Serve Symbolic Purpose

Some officials in the Trump administration hope an attack would force Iran to give up its nuclear enrichment program. Others have doubts.
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 26/02/2026
Fixed that for them. Hopefully the real journalists will win the next arm wrestling match.
NYT: "Trump’s Push for Election Power Raises Fears He Will ‘Subvert’ Midterms" corrected to "Trump Will Subvert Midterms"
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 24/02/2026
Can the judiciary send 1000 bailiffs to DC? Asking for a friend.
NYT: Judges Grow Angry Over Trump Administration Violating Their Orders
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 22/02/2026
The country where health insurance CEOs legally murder people for shareholder value and annual bonuses wants to send a hospital ship to a country with socialized medicine. The dementia tweet machine is playing Achilles to Irony's Hector. Not just killing, but chariot dragging its battered corpse.
bbc.com
Greenland says 'no thanks' to Trump US hospital boat
Greenland's PM reminded Trump of its free healthcare, after Trump said he was sending a boat to aid people who were allegedly "not being taken care of".
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 22/02/2026
Can you really call it satire if it is 100% plausible?
theonion.com
Aide Wearily Begins 5th Explanation Of Why Trump Can’t Pardon Prince Andrew
WASHINGTON—Exhausted from repeated efforts to explain the most basic aspect of political power, an aide to President Trump nevertheless began wearily explaining for the fifth time Friday why he couldn...
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 22/02/2026
Lest we lose track in all the fuckery, they published the manual ahead of time and provided a handy list of contributors both intellectual and fiscal to investigate when this regime cracks apart. No forgetting. No putting it behind us. Consequences for every fucking one who did anything culpable.
bbc.com
From Venezuela to immigration, Project 2025 provided Trump's roadmap
Just a year into Trump's second term, and about half of Project 2025's policies have been implemented, observers say.
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 20/02/2026
Translation: Corrupt justices smelling midterm blowout scramble to restore illusion of judicial integrity. No one is about to forget how eagerly they supported this fascist. Tick tock, motherfuckers.
NYT: The Supreme Court’s Declaration of Independence

The court’s rejection of President Trump’s tariffs program is the latest in a series of clashes between him and Chief Justice John G. Roberts Jr.
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 20/02/2026
They're pulling out all of the stops on the "Hey! Look at that! Over there!" strategy. No one is having any of it. Wall to wall Trumpstein Files. All day, every day. No letup until they're all in goddamn prison.
bbc.com
Trump directs US government to prepare release of files on aliens and UFOs
Trump says he will seek release of files on extraterrestrials, "based on the tremendous interest shown".
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 19/02/2026
Oh, look. Consequences actually are possible. Who knew?
NYT: U.K. Police Arrest Former Prince Andrew Over Epstein Ties, BBC Reports
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 19/02/2026
New footage released of Bondi's Congressional hearing testimony.
youtube.com
Baby Red-lipped batfish (Ogcocephalus darwini) "Okay, who got her this mad?" 😂
Share your videos with friends, family, and the world
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Haiku Alibi @haiku-alibi.bsky.social · 18/02/2026
This is such a transparent play to make everyone into nodes on a mass surveillance network. If they manage to release this successfully the next step will be deep discounts to make it a loss leader for selling the data to Palantir & friends. Zuck sez: "Hey, Ring, hold my beer."
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