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Good Samaritan

@goodsamaritanhq.bsky.social
3.4K followers 25K following 13 posts

Bringing good news, laughter, and joy. Help make this the biggest account on Bluesky!

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Good Samaritan @goodsamaritanhq.bsky.social · 8m
Have you ever wondered how long it would take a giraffe to throw up?
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Good Samaritan @goodsamaritanhq.bsky.social · 18h
I love when a hotel says checkout is 10am. I’m on vacation. At 10am I have barely established consciousness. Now you expect me to shower, pack, locate six chargers, check under the bed AND make sure I haven’t accidentally stolen a teaspoon? Checkout should be based on emotional readiness.
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Good Samaritan @goodsamaritanhq.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
I love when a recipe says “use half an onion.” Absolutely. And what exactly is the plan for the other half? Put it in the fridge? So three weeks from now I can discover it wrapped in cling film, looking like an archaeological specimen? No. We’re using the whole onion.
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Good Samaritan @goodsamaritanhq.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
I miss the confidence I had as a child. You could ask eight-year-old me to draw a horse and I’d hand you something resembling a microwave with legs and say: “That’s a horse.” No insecurity. No revisions. No feedback requested. Just pure artistic certainty. Honestly, I need that energy back.
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Good Samaritan @goodsamaritanhq.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
There should be an Olympic event for carrying every grocery bag inside in one trip. No second trips. No surrender. Just eight bags cutting off circulation to your fingers while you attempt to unlock the front door with one functioning knuckle. Gold medal. Permanent nerve damage. Worth it.
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Good Samaritan @goodsamaritanhq.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
I love when a recipe says “prep time: 10 minutes.” Ten minutes for WHO? A professional chef with eight hands? It takes me ten minutes to find the paprika. Then another five staring into the fridge hoping the ingredient I forgot to buy will spontaneously appear out of shame.
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Good Samaritan @goodsamaritanhq.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Being an adult is mostly saying “after this week things should calm down” until you die. I’ve been saying it since 2007. At this point I’m beginning to suspect there may not actually be a calm week. Just different themed disasters with occasional snacks.
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Niall Harbison @niallharbison.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
When I found her like this she could no longer move. She had 1000s of fleas on her and her life was about to end. Just look at her now. She has everything a dog could ever want! Beautiful little Skye
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Good Samaritan @goodsamaritanhq.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
I changed my password to “incorrect” because I kept forgetting it. Now whenever I enter the wrong password, the computer helpfully says, “Your password is incorrect.” Brilliant. Technology has finally become supportive. It’s basically my therapist, except cheaper and significantly more judgmental.
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Good Samaritan @goodsamaritanhq.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
A guy walks into a lumberyard and asks for some two-by-fours. The clerk asks, “How long do you need them?” The guy answers, “A long time. We’re going to build a house.”
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Good Samaritan @goodsamaritanhq.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
Did you know there is a species of antelope capable of jumping higher than the average house? This is due to its powerful hind legs and the fact that the average house cannot jump.
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Good Samaritan @goodsamaritanhq.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
Many of the proposed solutions have already been implemented somewhere and could, scientists claim, rapidly repair the planet within five years if they are scaled.
positive.news
51 ways to get the planet tipping the right way
Researchers have identified 51 positive tipping points that could save the planet. Here are five of the most promising
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Good Samaritan @goodsamaritanhq.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
Artificial intelligence has brought about a revolution in medical screening practices, with the technology able to make detections across hundreds of scans in seconds which can be forwarded to trained pairs of human eyes.
goodnewsnetwork.org
New AI Model Can Detect Heart Disease Markers in Simple Electrocardiogram Readings–a Breakthrough
Heart valve diseases and heart failure are the 2 conditions the AI is capable of detecting in the blink of an eye.
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Good Samaritan @goodsamaritanhq.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
A Baltimore woman has set out to eliminate the city’s book deserts by hopping aboard a trolley.
today.com
This Woman Is Bringing Free Books to Hundreds of Kids With Magical Trolley
Ms. Maze, who calls herself a “radical street librarian,” tells TODAY.com how she is working to eliminate book deserts around Baltimore “in a fun and magical way.”
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Spiritual Refuel @spiritualrefuel.bsky.social · 03/07/2026
Wherever the #Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom 2 Corinthians 3:17 Whether we are on vacation or simply running to the grocery store, there is #Freedom in every journey. For God's presence breathes life into our souls, calling us to share His #LOVE and #kindness with all folks! ✝️ #Truth
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