iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

A couple is down on their luck, so the husband volunteers to work the street corner for some extra cash. The next night, he comes home with $100.50, and his wife asks, “Which cheap person gave you 50 cents?” The husband replies, “All of them did!”

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Two men stole an entire stock of viagra from a pharmacy. The police are now on the lookout for two hardened criminals.

360

A couple arrived at the sexual health clinic. There was a sign on the door that said: “For family planning and contraceptives, please use the rear entrance”.

A man walks into a laundromat and goes up to the guy working behind the counter. He takes the items out of his bag and says: “I need to have these clothes cleaned”. The guy doesn't hear him and says, “Come again?” The man shakes his head and says, “Mustard this time!”

010

A girl asks her mother for a Barbie doll and a G.I. Joe doll for Christmas. “But Barbie comes with Ken,” her mother said. “No,” the girl replied, “she just fakes it with Ken”.

How did the woman terrify her gynecologist? She learned ventriloquism

140

What’s the difference between a Lamborghini and a dead body? I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.

When I see the names of lovers engraved on a tree, I don't find it cute or romantic. I find it weird how many people take knives with them on outings

Do you know the phrase “One man’s trash is another man’s treasure”? Wonderful saying, horrible way to find out that you were adopted

030

I’m on a whiskey diet. I’ve lost three days already

140

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, just like my grandfather. Not screaming in terror like the passengers on his bus .

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My girlfriend’s dog died, so I bought her another, identical one. She just screamed at me and said: “What the feck am I meant to do with two dead dogs?!?”

060

I'll never forget my Grandfather’s last words to me just before he died. "Are you still holding the ladder?”

050

I was drinking a beer and the waitress screamed “does anyone know CPR?” I yelled, “I know the entire alphabet” and we all laughed and laughed. Well, except for one person.

173

My wife and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children. If anybody does, please just send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow

040

We’ve noticed how “I’m sorry” and “I apologize” mean the same thing? Except at a funeral.

My older relatives liked to tease me at weddings, saying things like, “You’ll be next!” They stopped once I started doing the same to them at funerals.

091

Why is it that if you donate a kidney, people love you. But if you donate five kidneys, they call the police. It's like donating blood. They always ask those stupid questions.... "Whose blood is it? Why is it in a bucket?" Thats why I stopped doing this.

032

One reason they are so expensive is that it takes between 40 and 50 mink to make a fur coat. They would be a lot cheaper if they used a man with a sewing machine.

010

Gerry 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 🍀 @gerryr.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

Pedigree chum has just gone bust. They've had to call in the retrievers.

260

The two scumbags who gave evidence accusing Conor Mcgreggor’s victim of lying have been charged with perjury. Hope they have the book thrown at them.

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Gerry 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 🍀 @gerryr.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

An orange man is an Irish man who wishes he was an English man so he dresses up as a Scottish man so he can March in honour of a Dutch man. Hope that clears things up a bit 🍊

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I’m smelling shite here. Since when do terror suspects get bailed at all?

18328

How quickly this white supremacist and religious bigot scum organisation that is the Orange Order forget.🤬

12614

I mean Marco Pierre White is a wee bit of a dick but he is spot on about Jamie Oliver 🤣

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Gerry 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 🍀 @gerryr.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

For Odious cretins that are stuck in the 17th century, I suppose it’s no surprise they have dragged the north of Ireland back 30 years.

2112

Cracking wee day out at Two doors down at the hydro.

1193

Tory scum playing to the Daily Heil gantry again.🙄

6112

I thought Fire and rehire had been outlawed in the new employment laws that came in recently?

7116

Not just Israeli products, but any company continuing to do business there.

282

ALT: Scottish Flag Flying

I see a lot of criticism of the SNP that they aren’t doing enough to push independence So genuine question If WM continues to deny us our democratic right to decide our own future, what are the options? Supreme Court? UN? UDI? #independenceNow #IndyRef2 #IndependenceIsNormal #ScottishIndependence

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Scottish Flag Flying

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