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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹

@garethkthomas.bsky.social
282 followers 53 following 548 posts

Redefining our understanding of child trauma. Therapeutic Specialist with lived experience. Speaker & Writer. Director of Strategy @coect.bsky.social.

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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 14/11/2025
Another day, another sign our SEND system is utterly broken. At the start of this year, there were 638,745 EHCPs in place. That’s up 10.8% from the same time last year. However, it’s not just EHCPs that are breaking budgets...
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 09/11/2025
Nothing says “well done” like a failed mail-merge.
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 09/11/2025
I’m part of the last generation to experience childhood without a smartphone. I learned how to “swim in the digital deep” as an adult who got to play as a kid. Seems to work well.
We are educating children for a world where they will navigate social media, manage personal data, identify misinformation, and use mobile technology for work and communication.

If we ban the device entirely for seven formative years, we are sending them into the digital deep end without ever teaching them how to swim.
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 09/11/2025
Last weekend, a machine cut a duplicate key for me. This weekend, a machine processed my lunch order. I didn’t need to speak to another human. Is this progress?
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 09/11/2025
As a care-leaver, my eldest was automatically entitled to significant benefits. I encouraged and supported him into part time work. The ‘benefits’ he’s gained from this are immeasurable.
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 04/11/2025
From the Child Practice Review (CPR) looking at Neil Foden, the former head teacher and "prolific sex offender who harmed many children". Will lessons be learned?
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 02/11/2025
For the families I work with… Their children didn’t play when they were little. They were too hungry, scared, terrified. They were trying to survive. I no longer have any doubts about the importance of play.
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 01/11/2025
All while charging Local Authorities £85,617 per pupil, per year.
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 17/10/2025
In Wales, over a period of 18 months: “...14 people have not been killed on Welsh roads because of 20mph and 98 will have avoided a hospital visit for a serious injury.” Proud to live in a country where research and policy override politics.
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 03/10/2025
Ooooh... new book from Charlie Mackesy out this month. 😍
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 18/09/2025
5pm, after school, on a mild September evening. This purpose-built facility in our village is empty. Not a child in sight here, or on the two surrounding playing fields, or in the two nearby playgrounds.
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 17/09/2025
Keep school at school. Keep home at home. For children with trauma, this is often essential.
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 17/09/2025
Why do schools do this? An email goes out asking, “Are you nervous about being back in school?” on the same day they’re putting a child into a “lunchtime lockdown” for chewing gum (a well-known regulation strategy for children with trauma).
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 14/09/2025
From an interview with Peter Lamont, author of Radical Thinking.
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 12/09/2025
All three of my kids were shown graphic videos of Charlie Kirk’s assassination yesterday. They’re three different ages, in three different education settings (two of which have phone bans), across three local authorities. One of my kids doesn’t have their own smartphone.
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 10/09/2025
UNDERSTANDING behaviour is not EXCUSING behaviour. 👉 Going below surface-level behaviour is not dismissing behaviour 👉 Being radically curious about behaviour is not accepting behaviour 👉 Accepting what drives behaviour is not endorsing behaviour
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 09/09/2025
Therapeutic bath. 🛁 ❤️‍🩹
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 08/09/2025
As our kids return to school, I’m thinking of all those wonderful security blankets in the form of humans who work tirelessly with our kids. Children with trauma want a better life. That starts with never feeling that scared again.
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 07/09/2025
Is this sustainable? From Lana Hempsall in The Spectator.
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 06/09/2025
“A more substantial factor for me was the fact that staff and leaders said they felt safer and better trained,” [Bennett] said.
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 05/09/2025
Fostering doesn’t have a recruitment crisis. It has a retention crisis. From Mary Wakefield in @thespectator1828.bsky.social.
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 03/09/2025
We don’t have a behaviour crisis. We have an understanding children crisis.
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 02/09/2025
The job of adults isn’t just keeping children safe. It’s helping them feel safe.
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 12/08/2025
My son recently finished secondary school. He was there for 5 years. I never met any of his teachers.
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 12/08/2025
We need an education and social care system that *knows* children. Knows them on an individual basis. Knows their family. Knows their story. We are moving further away from that with each passing day.
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 11/08/2025
Can we normalise kids not taking mobile phones into their bedrooms? We have this as a house rule (even when friends come over), and we’re very much in the minority.
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 09/08/2025
I’m watching one of my kids thrive in part-time work. After so many years in education, where the consequences of behaviour are illogical and unnatural, the consequences of actions in work make perfect sense. Seems a much better way of learning.
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 08/08/2025
The news is out... following the success of the original A-Z of Therapeutic Parenting, I’m pleased to share I’ll be writing the follow-up A-Z (for teens and tweens), alongside the brilliant Sarah Naish, Sarah Dillon, and Sair Penna.
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 01/08/2025
I just took an early evening walk around my village. Lots of families live here. (Our primary school has two classes of 30 for each year group.) You wouldn’t know that—because none of the children who live here are outside.
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 24/07/2025
“If we want our sons, our daughters, all young people to read, we must grant them the same rights we grant ourselves.”
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 23/07/2025
Dr Sue Morris-King (Deputy Director for Schools and Early Education at Ofsted) tells MPs that schools with good levels of attendance think of it ‘like safeguarding’.
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 23/07/2025
From one of the slides I use when delivering training. We must understand the difference between accepting behaviour, and endorsing behaviour. They are very different, yet I often see them confused with each other.
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 22/07/2025
Forgotten your planner? Day in isolation. Why would any school do this? Because... if you don’t focus on small things, they spiral into big things. This... is broken windows theory. Here’s why it’s rubbish... 🗑️👇
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 22/07/2025
What I hear: If the focus is on connecting with children... how will they ever learn? What I think: Without connection, there is no learning.
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 21/07/2025
It's interesting that we have this concept of having a “good baby”. One that sleeps through the night, doesn't fuss too much, etc. The idea of categorising children based on their need for connection starts at a much younger age than I had imagined.
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 21/07/2025
Nobody wants this outcome, I'm sure. We need to think seriously about what we are doing to children. You don't grow great kids by drowning them in the fear of punishment. 🪴
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 21/07/2025
I played this with my 12-year-old every week for almost a year. Never once did I win. And it pains me to admit that I was *really* trying.
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 21/07/2025
When some schools hear about the need for a trauma-informed approach to teaching... “I think a lot of people worry that A, it's going to cost a lot of money and B, it's going to be a lot of work.” — Sarah Naish Featuring a shout-out for ‪@jennknussen.bsky.social‬ 🙌
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 18/07/2025
I’ve been thinking about the power of storytelling for children with early-life trauma. This got me thinking more... 🤔
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 17/07/2025
“Dozens of little doses of attention, kindness, patience each day can provide the therapeutic bath that one hour of therapy a week cannot.” — Bruce D. Perry
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 17/07/2025
“So if my children had to do homework, they’d stay at school and do an after school homework club, because then you’re keeping homework at school, which is where it belongs.” From our latest podcast series... Trauma Talks.
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 17/07/2025
Currently re-reading Punished by Rewards by @alfiekohn.bsky.social and I get this email. 👀
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 16/07/2025
“What we see a lot of in education in particular is people who are defending to their last breath the outdated models that do not work for children...”
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 16/07/2025
Very pleased to discover ‪@alfiekohn.bsky.social‬ has a new podcast. “If all his books and essays have one thing in common ... it’s that they are extremely inconvenient to read while driving, exercising, or making dinner.”
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 16/07/2025
On Tuesday, the grandparents of two-year-old Ethan Ives-Griffiths were found guilty of murder and child cruelty.
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 15/07/2025
“There is no need to scream when you want more food if you can simply say 'I’m hungry', and a caring adult responds.” Fascinating insight into what happens during the often overlooked middle childhood, from David Robson.
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 14/07/2025
“Fairy tales do not tell children the dragons exist. Children already know that dragons exist. Fairy tales tell children the dragons can be killed.” ― G.K. Chesterton
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 13/07/2025
This classic cartoon ran in Columbia University’s humour magazine, The Jester, in the November 1950 issue. Drawn by Mazzeo & Gardner.
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 13/07/2025
“For pupils with an education, health and care plan (EHCP), suspensions increased by 31.7 per cent compared with the previous year, crossing the 100,000 barrier for the first time (101,381).”
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Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹 @garethkthomas.bsky.social · 13/07/2025
Our children's social care system. **EVERYTHING IS FINE**
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