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But the truth of the matter is, no one is totally evil, though many people do evil things. And while I still get a little tense when I see a white man walking on the same sidewalk as me, I have given up that reactionary hatred. They're suffering hard under the patriarchy and it's sad.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 8h

I honestly think it's harmful to post reaction videos to this kind of content, that is (hopefully) fringe, because it just makes it more popular. I am losing brain cells talking about it. For me, it sort of played on what I thought about men after the assault. Totally evil.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 8h

bell hooks's intersectionality really makes the most sense, and the way she explained how patriarchy is also harmful to men. It blows my mind that people would not espouse and kind and thoughtful feminism like that. I just get tired of people giving these manosphere people mics by responding.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 8h

Right? I don't want to see hatred. Is there a weird pushback from certain (usually white men) people? Yes, there is. Should we take matters like safety and consent seriously? Yes. But FFS it needs to be intersectional and it needs to be thought critically and people just want to go the cheap way.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 8h

Which was part of why I wanted to make video content, to help fill in that gap. But meh.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 8h

It's dumb, TBH. Like, for obvious reasons I don't want to see porn in the mainstream, but I also don't want to see these gothfluencers or whatever profit from arguing with it, making people think it is A Thing. It's also frankly hard to find good goth content that is not "Here's how to look goth!"

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 8h

But yeah. I totally support you seeing a therapist, because it will help, and because you deserve peace.

static.klipy.com

Ghost Hug: You Can't Feel It

ALT: Ghost Hug: You Can't Feel It

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 8h

It sucks that we have to work so hard to get back to a baseline, because we did not deserve to experience what happened. It wasn't our fault. And whatever happened to you wasn't your fault. Your body was trying to protect you. And sometimes when it does that, it's hard for it to get out of that.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 8h

I wouldn't be alive if it weren't for my therapists, and my current one really helped me a lot, to the point where most stuff is maintenance now. All this to say that it won't always be this way, and it will get better.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 8h

I intend to look into EMDR, because I still get flashbacks, and the assault was in 2020. I don't get them nearly as bad as I did the first year, but they don't come around all the time anymore. Oh, and make sure you look for a trauma therapist. If you get a good one, you won't be stuck.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 8h

If you are having flashbacks, do the thing that people in contemplative prayer say: let it pass. Just try to tell yourself, "That's a thought." Because the more you fight it, the more it will "Here's Johnny!" Jack Nicholson style you. But trying to keep your baseline chill is the best you can do.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 8h

You'd think horror and creepiness would make things worse, but honestly watching and snarking on those vids with my friend probably saved my life. The point is, find a thing and latch onto it, because your brain will go weird places. You just kind of have to battle it.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 8h

It's funny. What worked for me ultimately was watching dumb "ghost" videos on YouTube. I started watching them remotely with my friend, when I was living in an extended stay in a bad part of town. Being creeped out and calling out people making these vids kind of helped?

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 8h

That's a good idea! I find doing a craft at night does help. Also reading something light before bed is super helpful too. I've been missing out the past few days, but I will usually read from an anthology or one of my favorite historical romance author's novels.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 8h

Right? It's so weird that toxic positivity is seen as something good.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 8h

It has been that way for over a decade. I remember people remarking about it for a while. But it's still frustrating to see and when I was struggling was very depressing. But yeah, the curated life story is bizarre. And we call this social media, but it feels so antisocial.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 8h

It's so frustrating to see friends blithely post AI stuff that they "made" while I am a creative person whose livelihood has been destroyed by gen AI. So lame.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 8h

Right? Like, I was even in a junk journaling (FFS!) group for a while. I learned a lot, but had to leave because of the people harassing others on a huge level. It was an anti-AI group, but people would get so cruel if someone accidentally posted. On the other hand, I don't want to see AI slop!

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 8h

And I added that if people need help fact checking, I would be more than happy to help. This cagey person there said that I must be a fascist because I didn't like the piling, and that I should "KYS." I honestly hadn't heard the term before that. I looked it up and left the group. It's so bad.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 8h

I was in a goth antifascist group for a minute, and they were witch hunting Gary Numan, with no evidence. I actually dug into his life, scoured primary sources, etc., and put them out there. I then posted that maybe we shouldn't be calling out public figures as fascholes without evidence.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 8h

Right? I find it really disturbing that people can just tralala someone's life, even if it isn't someone they personally know. Like, I understand distancing to some extent, but the gleefulness is another level of WTAF. And yes! People who go on there and tell people to off themselves are sick.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 8h

It's not a sign of intimacy. It's also not healthy for people to get that close. It does mean there is something wrong, and I say that from experience of being in a relationship where I was anxiously attached. It never goes well.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 8h

I've also observed that these kinds of accounts are also merged because the (usually guy) doesn't feel like making an account but wants a presence. Which is creepy in some kind of surveillance way. Like, can't be bothered to make an account? Why use your partner's?

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 8h

Oh God, right? I frankly don't understand why any loving person would do that. Like, at best it reeks of codependency. It's so important, even for people in relationships, to have your own things, separate from the other person. Your own agency.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 19h

Why are we streaming executions now? Living in America is like living in a nightmare, every day. I personally do not think anyone should ever be killed by the state, but most certainly no one's last moments should be on display for all and sundry. I also don't want to see this by proxy.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 19h

Absolutely. Two of my closest friends are people I met from online, and my favorite person I also met online. I'd love for things to go back to where you could establish connections with people. Social media has kind of made these more difficult, though. Oddly.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 19h

Life happens! I haven't been online as much because I'm frankly just burned out. Haven't felt very social. Vaguely depressed. You are gonna be OK and things are gonna work out even better.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 19h

I even sleep without my glasses on now, which I kept on for all of around four years. I was so afraid I'd have to wake up and act, you know? If you need anyone to talk to about how to handle things, LMK. It sucks butt, and likes to pop up in random ways. Sending you so much love.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 19h

Oh sending you my best wishes. It's a very annoying path to have to walk, but it does get better, I swear. I was homeless a few years ago, after an assault, and some other unfortunate things that happened. I am so lucky to be in a safe place now, and to have a good therapist.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 19h

I have that sometimes, too, where sleep is something I am kind of scared to do. It's been really hard to regulate since the assault. Sometimes I get hypervigilant. But it's gotten better over time. White nights suck, especially if you want to sleep.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 19h

And they have probably never written a paper in their lives. It's so maddening. But unfortunately, it's one of those triggering things for me, that makes me mad. It upsets me when I see cosplayers of color or size and the comment sections....:( I can't imagine what it must be like to receive that.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 19h

And I had to stop following a few social justice pages that didn't really do anything bad, other than that their comment sections were riddled with people/bots saying that the Cambridge prof deserved to die because he plagiarized, which is suddenly, when accused of doing it while Black, a crime.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 19h

Holy crap, yes. For some reason people thought it was cute to openly come out as racist on FB and parade it like some dudes in white bedsheets. I can't even follow people like Ibrahm X. Kendi on there because of the laugh reacts and really genuinely nasty things these people say.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 19h

Right. Like, you just get a bunch of brainwashed or even not thinking people who just go with it. I have a cousin who makes these performative posts about her family and suggested that her boyfriend may have done something nonconsensual to her. The facade is apparently so important.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 19h

Holy cannoli! Or those accounts where it's like NickNTina Lastnamehere. Like, the concept of having your own account is completely foreign? That is triggering.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 19h

I am a fat woman and both of those things are not loved in a community that is chock full of bros. I spent a year worrying about the comments, even though the account is not managed by me. If you don't get harassed, you get ignored altogether.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 19h

You know? The best I get on those things is a few likes, and I am excited for it. I just don't have the energy to post clever things 20 times a day, you know? Also, one of my biggest worries was doing shortform video content for the company I write for, The Philosopher's Shirt.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 19h

Like, I'd rather not see porn go mainstream enough for people in a subculture to be concerned about goth women getting harassed, but... Sigh.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 19h

They made these OF ladies into a big issue for the subculture, which I do not think they are, as they are OF ladies, and pornography is all fantasy anyway. Talk to people in real life and they don't care (as you should). It's really f-ed up, with the algorithm.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 19h

It has gotten so bad that I frankly started to look at things and go, "Dude, that is a stretch to assume this about men." Similar with the goth stuff. I found a nice goth community from a creator who talks goth nostalgia. But am also tired of the SWs with goth aesthetic vs. gothtubers.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 19h

I will say that I haven't seen a bunch of AI content, but I personally get a lot of gender wars kind of content, to the point where I just want it to go away. I am a feminist and was, after the assault, edging toward misandrist (I am glad I never got there), so I watched a few videos on the subject.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 19h

Yes! All of the above! I really did keep up with my friends from college there for a while, but many of them have (understandably) left the platform. I do actually have online friends from Facebook, who I met on the platform. But try posting even a cute comment and watch as they explode.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 19h

Yeah, I have PTSD and frankly it played so hard on my mental health that I spent about a week in a psych hospital, just to get back to a baseline. But I have also been to the ER for chest pains related to anxiety, so you definitely have my sympathies and compassion.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 08/10/2026

I had started to amass a following on FB, as a writer/professional eccentric. I was even going to start shortform video content. But now I don't even know if it's worth it. I joined FB as a college student, when it was only for college students. It's pretty disgusting to see what it has become.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 08/10/2026

As I understand it, this is not the only such page that is receiving the FB chop. One wonders if they are preparing the rhetoric they want for the election. Which sounds so conspiracy theory...but sometimes it feels like the times in which we are living are c. theories come true.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 08/10/2026

The dogpiling and bullying have been part of FB for several years now, at least, but it's definitely ramped up in the past year. Today, I saw one of my favorite pages get downgraded for "unoriginality" of its content. This page has been on Facebook for literally years, and is LGBTQIA+.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 08/10/2026

Facebook was the reason I've migrated to Bluesky. Last year, I landed in the hospital from the anxiety from using Facebook and witnessing the world fall apart around me in real time. The harassment there has become unmanageable. Every comment is met with bullying or vitriol.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 08/10/2026

I appreciate your approach, nonetheless.

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C.M. Black @foucaultu.bsky.social · 08/10/2026

And it is really appreciated! We are not expecting the next Lord Byron to wax poetic about our work.

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