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Benny Feldman

@feldfrog.bsky.social
5.4K followers 261 following 1.6K posts

👽🤝🦋🤝🐸 My first stand-up special Butterfly Pavilion is coming soon. bennyfeld.com

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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
I wish I could get all my friends together in one room for one big laugh
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
She’s sound mixing
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
My special should be out in like two weeks or some shit
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
My dad always said “I’m not a big pithy quote guy”
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
I don’t drop any loot when I die, but there is a funeral cutscene
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
Clout should fall out of you like sonic coins when you die
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
People often ask if I am neuro divergent . No I am simply conventionally an odd duck
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
When a comedian is a dentist or some shit, they love to do comedy and be like “so I’m a dentist”
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
Clout is a bludgeon
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
We should obviously hunt the moon in case it’s alive
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
I would be woke in the apocalypse
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
The apocalypse is one of the few times it’s fine to be a cannibal, but sadly it’s also when people probably taste the worst
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Why would you become a marauding cannibal in the apocalypse. Just kicking people while they’re down. Show some respect for the wastes
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
Me: I just invented a new slang term, “Buster,” for when a guy thinks he’s fly. My Girlies: You mean a scrub? Me: yes. Also known as a buster
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
Imagine coming up with the slang term “buster” for a guy who thinks he’s fly, and finding out there’s already a slang word for it
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
Some of the best stand-up specials are from comedians who are in their late thirties / early forties and haven’t had any sort of big break, and have a pent up true spirit because of it
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
A scrub is a guy who thinks he’s fly. A buster is a guy who thinks he’s fly.
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
Shoes on the bed is fine who cares. Oh no I’m sleeping in a tiny bit of dirt
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
Lady at the train station is loudly watching an AI slop marital court drama series
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
Jeopardy money becomes worse and worse over time with inflation, but the questions get harder and harder with new information
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
Throwing a decoy version of yourself into the discourse to see what everyone says
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Going back to your hometown and seeing faces that look like an old ex, like ohhhh they make those there
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
No no. Writing is all about brevity. Just say, “A buster is a guy who thinks he’s fly.” It’s cleaner.
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
Doing an entirely different hour from Butterfly Pavilion that I haven't named yet
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
A second apple hits Isaac Newton "Ah, shame on me that time”
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
My name is Chanty Beluga (My name is Chanty Beluga) I'm walking down the street (I'm walking down the street) I love you (I love you) Let's go to the beach
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
If you just watch enough YouTube video essays, you’ll figure it all out, your mind will unlock everything, and you’ll be able to fix the world. The shipping logistics, the voting systems, you’ll use the best new battery, you’ll undo everything Raegan did, and you’ll make the perfect action movie.
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
May cars were set on fire and eaten shortly after in the Busytown race riots
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
A lot of comedians don’t realize you have invincibility frames between the setup and punchline
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
Dragging my mind across your posts
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
Real Gs move in silence like a breathtaking video of owl flight
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
They say a hippo can crush you with their jaws. But did you know they can also crush you with the rest of their body
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
If you’re a squirrel who lives underwater in a bio-dome, and your best friend is a sponge, you might be a redneck
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
I would sit down with Squidward and be the first person to just truly listen.
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
I feel like the glass at the aquarium is less about keeping the fish in and more about keeping me out
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
Irony is literally just caricature
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
My name's not Thomas
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
Many people seem to think the word "exploitation" in exploitation of labor just means when the workers are treated actively poorly in a workplace, as opposed to having the value of their labor siphoned by owners. They offer what they think are counter arguments of companies that treat employees well
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
I can see every inch of your skull
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
Every step I take in New York City, the Manayunk canal flows with me beneath my feet
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 01/09/2026
my dad emailed me an article by copying the entire body of the article to the email
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 30/08/2026
(Becoming poop) AHH ! The poop symbiote !
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
People love to say to me, unprompted, hey man I've got a joke you should use in your act. And then they unwittingly tell me a street pun
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
Jerry Seinfeld in a Sensory Deprivation Tank
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
Guy asked me if I do one-liners because they are easier lol
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
People are constantly telling me that they told their friend one of my jokes and their friend didn’t get it
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
Some people are worried about 3D printed weapons. I've been printing out little Redwall swords and giving them to mice before I put them in my ball python's tank. I promise you 3D printed weapons are harmless
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 20/08/2026
People went to the movies back in the day and thought the train was going to come right out of the screen at them. Nothing has changed. Nowadays people go to the movies and think they are just like the quippy superheroes
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 20/08/2026
Some people believe in a clockmaker god. I believe in a haberdasher god. I think the universe is a well made hat
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Benny Feldman @feldfrog.bsky.social · 20/08/2026
Women love to maintain the PH balance of their pussy like a terrarium . It’s perfectly balanced and cum will throw it off like aphids
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