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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin

@esaeger.bsky.social
3.6K followers 3.2K following 2K posts

Writes political humor books, reviews music, sells antiques. Close the CIA before I get really performatively angry.

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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 22h
Say, did anyone else have "Democrats will become overconfident and start chasing votes in hopeless hookworm-infested shitholes like Mississippi, all while doing everything they can to weaken progressive candidates and ignoring literally half of their voters" on their Bingo card? I did, just sayin.
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
Too late. The minute that lunatic appeared I tried to remind people that the oldest rule of internet discourse is "ignore the trolls." He should have been completely shunned by the press starting on day one. Corporate media is and always has been our biggest problem. This is *all* their fault.
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
Just happened to google this right on time. I'm ready baby 🤣
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
How groovy rock fans, a (totally fixed) "Open For Ed Sheeran" contest in partnership with Guitar Center, where idiots who don't know how to check Craigslist for second-hand Les Pauls go to get royally ripped off. He might as well just start his "Carnival Cruise To Haifa" tour with Gwyneth right now.
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
Cnspiracy theories have entered the "AI will kill us all" chat. Some say OpenAI couldn't "escape the sandbox" and hack HuggingFace without help. No. The only way to prevent an AI from "escaping a sandbox" is to give it *no possible route at all* to the internet. OpenAI was negligent and reckless.
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Not paywalled: If Trump Weren’t a Redhead He Wouldn’t Be So Insane. ericsaeger.medium.com/if-trump-wer...
ericsaeger.medium.com
If Trump Weren’t a Redhead He Wouldn’t Be So Insane
I’ve never told anyone but Jen this one and it might sound kind of stupid (all together now: “What else is new?”) but I’m committing it to…
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
You know, if this country were a person it'd be a scarily overweight 75-year-old in a glittery star-spangled "Fueled By Bullshit" tee shirt and an NFL team cap riding around on a Walmart mobility scooter. I demand that my $5,000 be paid in pennies so I can pick out the "valuable ones" and double it.
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
Voting for the "lesser evil" doesn't make you the least bit superior to the 23-year-old who stays home out of spiteful hopelessness after they conclude that none of the available candidates represent any of their interests. Dickens would wonder why any modern American bothers at all.
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 06/09/2026
When the Colorado River dries up and California and Las Vegas finally enter their inevitable Mad Max phase, will people blame it all on data centers or will they remember that growing a single avocado for disgusting guacamole takes roughly 70 to 80 gallons of water?
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 01/09/2026
100%, except I'd add that all that crap is in the form of a 10,000-word "plan" that they barf onto their website and then scold normal people for not ever reading after they lose in yet another "close election"
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 06/08/2026
New tactic in the anti-police-state resistance movement just dropped, but don't do it pleeeease
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 30/07/2026
Not paywalled: Now AI Companies Are Destroying Priceless Books: The Dying Information Age medium.com/p/now-ai-com...
medium.com
Now AI Companies Are Destroying Priceless Books: The Dying Information Age
I don’t know about you, but for me it’s been a particularly nauseating week of endless outrages, one thing after another. The topper for me…
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 29/07/2026
GenX are just boomers who unironically complain because their parents weren't around to make them miserable for a couple of hours after school.
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 29/07/2026
There are plenty of libruls who defend people like former right-wing (Daily Caller) "journalist" Kaitlin Collins with "Whatever, she's on our side now" just because she landed at CNN. I'm just like "Yeah bro, Joey Goebbels totally should have co-anchored the CBS Evening News with Walter Cronkite."
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 28/07/2026
The aggregate left can't get out of its own way to organize for power because everyone thinks their stupid fucking club is more valid than the others.
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 20/07/2026
Yuh. At maximum capacity, the U.S. Strategic Petroleum Reserve can supply the U.S. market for about 2 to 3 months. A presidency focused on literally nothing but insider-trading nonsense and payback against political enemies was eventually going to lead to some extraordinary events. Clock's ticking.
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 19/07/2026
"Tumorland"
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 16/07/2026
Jfc I don't know what was burning in Canada yesterday but here in New Hampshah it totally smells like the public men's room at York Beach, Maine, a combination of bulk-purchased urinal cakes, old-dude piss and the random glandular activity of 11-year-old boys who have no idea what's happening
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 14/07/2026
Not paywalled: Stephen King Predicted Obama ericsaeger.medium.com/stephen-king...
ericsaeger.medium.com
Stephen King Predicted Obama
What do I think of Obama glad you asked. I think that like Trump he hated the job, having to do everything his oligarchal owners told him…
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 11/07/2026
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 04/07/2026
Happy birthday failing republic, George Washington had to beg Thomas Jefferson to take the position of the first Secretary of State until he resigned in disgust. Nowadays our Secretaries of State are nothing more than architects of genocide.
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 02/07/2026
I hope every MAGA who bought this moronic "investment" has to eat Little Friskies for the rest of the year. Trump isn't just "the most corrupt president ever," he's one of the top five worst people ever born. I mean can you even believe this?
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 17/06/2026
Coming soon to a shithole country near you. But no really, ladies, keep believing that the fact that NOW is currently run by the same bunch of snobby, brunching, progressive-hating useful DNC idiots that helped lose Roe v Wade for you won't lead to anything a million times worse.
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 06/06/2026
Leadbelly being intentionally ironic about the horrors of capitalism's exploitation of... well, everyone (1945).
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 04/06/2026
Common sense tells us that real socialism would work because most people would be more than happy to contribute their time and labor to bettering others' lives. Psychologists say people's existential miseries stem from *not* being able to help others because under capitalism it's "just not done."
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 03/06/2026
The endgame will not be tweeted.
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 29/05/2026
One hundred fucking thousand dollars for a court-side ticket to the Knicks game
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 22/05/2026
Yes, and then force the CIA to tell Congress everything they do and how astronomical their funding is, then replace them with the State Department's INR, which would focus our "intelligence" more on building international relationships and not randomly killing brown people for oil and rare metals.
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Reposted by Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin
Stellbound: Stellraiser II @antlervel.vet · 17/05/2026
Grogu’s family has announced he has passed away. “He was probably like 56 years old, which is like a baby age for little freaks like him,” his mother told the Times. He will be flushed down a special toilet with an extra wide pipe designed for Yoda disposal. “Like a big green turd,” she added
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 18/05/2026
ha ha
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 17/05/2026
Not paywalled: Rebellion Across The Generations: What Would Kerouac Say About Livestreamed Genocides? medium.com/p/rebellion-...
medium.com
Rebellion Across The Generations: What Would Kerouac Say About Livestreamed Genocides?
A funny thing happened. I’d never had any interest at all in the 1950s Beatniks (or the hippies who came after them; both movements…
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 11/05/2026
Not paywalled: Contrapoints BATTLES Briahna Joy Gray in Online Silly-fest, Audience LOSES medium.com/p/contrapoin...
medium.com
Contrapoints BATTLES Briahna Joy Gray in Online Silly-fest, Audience LOSES
Okay, so I was going to write a long serious piece about Briahna Joy Gray’s new interview with Contrapoints, but it’s antiques-buying…
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 07/05/2026
Me, suddenly realizing I have to start posting a lot of stuff in a hurry because I took like a whole week off social media and everyone just figured I died
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 07/05/2026
All my life, every time I pick up a baby it starts screaming and squalling. I always figured it was because babies can totally sense when a carnivorous egg-eating scavenger is close by.
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 06/05/2026
Daily reminder that collective action, pooled resources and complete rejection of the status quo are the only things that matter anymore.
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Reposted by Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin
Cɧɾis Ϣitɧεɾfεɾɳ @chriswtfern.bsky.social · 04/05/2026
They should make a social platform exclusively for AI chuds. Call it "Glass House" and its core feature is that it automatically and instantly blocks anyone who disagrees with you.
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 06/05/2026
America's civilian population reacts to $6 gas prices ruining all their tightly budgeted summer vacation plans on top of having no healthcare, political representation or viable career paths
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 04/05/2026
"One of my friends is like a beer expert, you know, he's like 'We gotta go to a brewery,' I'm like 'Why can't we just go to a bar?' He's like 'It's fun, you can see how it's made!' I don't care how it's made. Look, I like porn, but I don't need to go to a broken home." - Mark Normand
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 03/05/2026
Weasel-speak: "Don't be silly, we're not laying people off and replacing them with bug-infested beta versions of AI workers! We're simply spending so much on fixing AI bugs that we can't afford to keep our human workers, lol don't you get the difference?" *That's* how stupid he thinks you are.
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 01/05/2026
Oh stfu about "86 47 means REMOVE, not moider!" Your daily reminder that us way-too-online types who eat raw liver with hotXXX tabasco sauce first thing in the AM are all messaging each other with stuff like "Actually, I'm more like '187 47' baby, what is this Brady Bunch bullshit?" Grow a couple.
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 22/04/2026
It'll be such a time-saver when people can walk into a store and the salespeople know not to even ask them if they need help because of their -100 credit score
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 22/04/2026
Even corporate AI can't lie about the fact that capitalism is basically slavery, go ahead, ask it
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 22/04/2026
The shitlibs are going to fall for it again. Not paywalled. medium.com/p/tucker-car...
medium.com
Tucker Carlson, The Liberal Sphere’s Latest Trojan Horse
Behold the shitlib NBC/MS NOW punditocracy, preparing to welcome verified transphobic misogynist (go read his book) Tucker Carlson into the…
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 22/04/2026
Behold the shitlib punditocracy, preparing to welcome verified transphobic misogynist Tucker Carlson into the cool kids club. All he'll change after he replaces Trump in the hearts of the heartless MAGA faithful will be firing any ICE stormtroopers who can't do 10 pull-ups.
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 21/04/2026
Friggin hate this joke country
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 21/04/2026
The problem with Facebook is that you'll post a meme like the one below, highlighting some slightly dated statistic, and you can always count on some jerkoff who's feeling rebellious to barge in and reply with something massively douchey like "Welllll, that's not eNtiReLy aaaaaaaacuraaaate"
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 18/04/2026
I have no respect whatsoever for anyone who tries to sound smart by adding superfluous syllables to words that are perfectly suited to their given purpose on their own. It's dumb, knock it off.
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 05/04/2026
Finally the generic-standard psychedelic, mawkish-yet-ghoulish greeting card this stupid holiday deserves.
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Eric Saeger, Obscure Author & Rate-Limited Goblin @esaeger.bsky.social · 04/04/2026
Where's that confounded military coup to finish off Trump already, not paywalled: ericsaeger.medium.com/wherefore-ar...
ericsaeger.medium.com
Wherefore Art Though, Military Coup? (or, Is Trump Dying?)
You may have seen some chatter about U.S. military generals getting fired by Trump for refusing to comply with some of his utterly insane…
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