enkille @enkille.bsky.social · 04/06/2026our financial advisor told us scientists said the first person to live to be 150 has already been born. i'm like yeah because millennials can't afford to finance a midlife crisis until we're 75 000
enkille @enkille.bsky.social · 31/05/2026would it be more appropriate to hold a funeral for the country on july 4th? people could give eulogies and talk about better times? it was never perfect, but it was at least better. 000
enkille @enkille.bsky.social · 18/03/2026my wife and i are both playing pokopia, and every time she tells me about something she's encountered i respond with "ditto" 010
enkille @enkille.bsky.social · 11/02/2026i thought i had jazz in my soul but my doc says they're palpitations 010
enkille @enkille.bsky.social · 24/09/2025fun fact: the rapture actually occurred in 2016. all the christians' souls left their bodies, and the remaining soulless husks voted for trump. 000
enkille @enkille.bsky.social · 24/05/2025i think diddy was only successful because he knew whose palms to grease 010
enkille @enkille.bsky.social · 27/12/2024Some of my neighbors already have their Christmas decorations up, it just starts earlier and earlier I guess 000
enkille @enkille.bsky.social · 14/12/2024Saw some pillows at Target the other day that said "All is Calm". I wonder how many of those you could place in a room before it becomes unsettling. 000
enkille @enkille.bsky.social · 10/12/2024So are Republicans out there watching V for Vendetta and rooting for the government? 000
enkille @enkille.bsky.social · 07/12/2024I really enjoy how the JetBrains Rider splash screen matches my wallpaper 010
enkille @enkille.bsky.social · 28/11/2024Smoked the turkey this year with apple wood, turned out pretty good 010
enkille @enkille.bsky.social · 25/11/2024A grilled cheese should be smashed as flat as possible and cut diagonally 000
enkille @enkille.bsky.social · 20/11/2024I'm generally against AI in my web browser, but if the technology exists to replace Trump with the Hamburglar in images I'd be into that. 000
enkille @enkille.bsky.social · 15/11/2024Aha, I found it. Luke chapter 24 verse 51b: As Jesus ascended into the heavens he spake unto his disciples saying "But if the price of eggs gets a little too high, ignore all that stuff I said." 000
enkille @enkille.bsky.social · 12/11/2024Very important not to conflate Steve Miller 🎸 and Stephen Miller 🤢 010
enkille @enkille.bsky.social · 07/11/2024So president hamburglar and vice president grimace then? 000
enkille @enkille.bsky.social · 03/11/2024Sorry if it's too cold out today, I accidentally left the patio ceiling fan on overnight 000
enkille @enkille.bsky.social · 27/10/2024Trying to see if I can pinpoint when seeing an update for my phone went from "Oh cool, what'd they do this time?" to "Jesus Christ what'd they do this time?" 000
enkille @enkille.bsky.social · 05/10/2024The other day my mother-in-law says to me "You're not red in the neck, you're red in the face." We were just trying to determine if my face was flush, but as a southerner it was the sickest burn I have ever received. 000
enkille @enkille.bsky.social · 02/10/2024The Cybertruck is less of a pickup truck and more of a letdown truck 000
enkille @enkille.bsky.social · 01/10/2024It sure would be nice if you could collect random items off the ground and sell them to any shop for money like in video games. Find a particularly neat rock? Take it over to Publix and vendor it for $5 000
enkille @enkille.bsky.social · 23/09/2024The Cybertruck kind of looks like somebody tried to make an N64 model of a Pontiac Aztek from memory 0203
