I still make a comic that I post to my website every Monday even though I rarely post on socials about it anymore. You can view it here:
ellejohara.com/threads/
Look at that subtle blue/green CSS. The tasteful simplicity of the UI. Oh my god, it even has an RSS feed.
ellejohara.com/threads/feed/
![Anouk and Midori converse as their trip continues north.
Midori (off panel): Then you arrived all the way from the Southern Water Tribe!
Midori: Since Harmonic Convergence was a global phenomenon, it makes sense that new airbenders would come from all over the world.
Midori: Who knows how many others are out there.
Midori: Oh!
Midori: This is so exciting!
Midori: I hope you don't mind that I'm doing so much talking.
Anouk (writing): It's okay. I'm not the best at conversation.
Midori (looking at her hands): I'd love to learn how to talk with my hands.
Midori: It seems like a beneficial skill to have.
[Anouk's journal is filled with her previous conversation, plus the following:]
Anouk (writing): I should introduce you to my old waterbending master. She could teach you.
Midori (off panel): I wonder if the old Air Nomads had a handsign language of some sort.
Midori: Wait...
Midori: You had a waterbending master?!](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:smfbrzsfsmjotl42ibwscqua/bafkreiciuooszojfqb5oerfrch6spwjs5n2mfpehl5zrpwaxg4yf5estdm)
![Azula is snurled up like a little kitten on Ty Lee's lap. Ty Lee is texting Suki.
Ty Lee: I'm running late. Stuck in traffic.
Suki: Not a problem. Get here when you can.
Suki: Say hi to traffic for me! [wink emoji]](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:smfbrzsfsmjotl42ibwscqua/bafkreigncgmcvfhzda5s2p2t5sm5wzakthdkdzb476337mje6s4lxqjqni)
![From my webcomic, "Threads from the Blue Rock Tapestry". Roimata and Drago are having a conversation in her car.
1.
[Drago and Roimata are sitting in a car together, waiting outside of an apartment complex.]
Drago: Hey, can I ask you something?
Roimata: Sure.
2.
Drago: Why are you helping me?
Drago: I mean, you don't owe me anything. And I've got nothing to offer you.
3.
Roimata: What is the most important thing in the world?
Drago: Money. Wait, food. ... Air?
4.
[Roimata pokes Drago in the shoulder and he pulls his hand back in surprise.]
Roimata: People. People! It is the people!
5.
Roimata: None of us choose to exist. Every single person is fighting a personal battle that shapes the way they deal with the world. And often that can feel really isolating.
Roimata: But it doesn't have to be.
6.
[Roimata points back and forth between the two of them.]
Roimata: Humans and sprites, in our universe or in this one ... we're all struggling together in this chaos called life.
Roimata: I feel we owe it to each other to make our short time here the best it can be for everyone, not just for ourselves.](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:smfbrzsfsmjotl42ibwscqua/bafkreid6z7pjvozce64mtizqgcun2hn7rtha5qtbvz3iw5pelmgjcsi4yq)
![Kitab - Not Really Anything
1.
[I lean on the sink and look at my reflection.]
In my youth, people often told me I had so much potential to become somebody.
Like a famous artist or something.
But I have never been able to live up to this potential.
Now, decades later, I understand why.
For a while I thought it was Borderline Personality Disorder.
But I found out what it actually is.
2.
[I hold my fists up. Above each is a figure: the ADHD Creature and the Autism Creature.]
It turns out one can be ADHD and autistic at the same time.
That's a hard-hitting one-two punch that makes everything I try to do much more difficult and frustrating.
3.
[Behind me are some folks. Two are chatting. Another two are flirting. I cannot tell the difference.]
It's why I don't understand how people work.
For example, I always misinterpret social cues.
4.
[Around me are examples of hobbies and projects I've abandoned or left unfinished. I look very sad/frustrated.]
Vintage computers; making videos for my YouTube channel; belly dance (and dance in general); my graphic novel; my homebuilt electronic wind instrument (and music-making in general); volleyball (specifically sand court)
It's why I abandon hobbies and never finish what few projects my executive dysfunction actually allows me to start.
5.
[I cry out in anguish as the tag on my tee shirt drives me insane.]
It's why I sometimes lose my shit over something completely trivial.
Like an itchy tag irritating the back of my neck.
6.
[Finger guns to my reflection.]
I am AuDHD. It's not a bug. It's a feature.
Which is fine, I guess. I'd definitely rather be autistic than borderline.
7.
[I glare over my shoulder into the camera.]
I'm 50 years old now. I've always been like this. It's not going to change.
I'm fundamentally dysfunctional.
8.
On the bright side, I guess I don't need to feel pressured to try and become someone anymore.
Because now I know that's probably not even possible.
[Text on each side of my face: Certified Nobody]](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:smfbrzsfsmjotl42ibwscqua/bafkreiasmgx2oxkd6wqpe2r5pmnuz3yeqo3bcy6kwu2mwncbzxyduqiy3m)
![Beau (Beau-ly): I'm gonna go sleep in my own room. Just pound on the wall if you need me.
Jester (confused): Wuh... You don't want to...
SADNESS looms over Jester and her heart cracks in twain
Jester (weakly): Yasha? Do you want to be my roommate?
Yasha (with stoic kindness): Yeah, I'll be your roommate.
Jester: Okay
Yasha (who loves flowers): You have one of the garden rooms, right?
Jester (bits of candy floating above her): Sure!
Yasha: Yeah. I will come in there.
Jester: Okay!
Beau: Caduceus, you flying solo?
Caduceus (pointing at Fjord): No, we're...
Fjord (interrupting): Just you.
Beau (dawning realization): Oh! *I'm* flying solo.
Jester (exasperated): I thought that's what you said you were doing, Beau!
Beau (pointing her thumb back toward the guys): I just didn't want to sleep with *them.*
Jester (eager once again): Well then, sleep with me and Yasha.
[Beau considers this in a probably non-canonical dream sequence]
[Jester is the little spoon, Yasha is the big spoon, andBeau is snugly sandwiched between them on the bed. They're all smiling.]
Beau: (making a good decision): All right. I'll sleep with you and Yasha!
Jester (very pleased): Oh, okay!](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:smfbrzsfsmjotl42ibwscqua/bafkreibegeb2lca7oj3unzrmv347qql3prl5vx77uqjv6j6d6bf7lzqunu)
![Knot Great at Drawing Smut
1.
[Sarita is in a blue latex dress, and Astrid looks like The Baroness from G.I. Joe.]
S: So you're thinking about drawing some smut, but don't know where to begin?
A: Yeah.
2.
[Suddenly Sarita is artistically nude, with her hair draped to hide anything that might cause someone to clutch their pearls.]
S: Well, start simple. Draw a nude person.
A (scoffing): Tch! But nudity is so boring!
3.
S (surprised): I'm sorry? Nudity is boring?
A: It's like, "Here's a naked person. Wow. So neat."
4.
A: It leaves nothing to the imagination.
S: What about nudity with a little spice?
5.
[Astrid ponders while Sarita continues talking.]
S: Maybe you should try drawing kink.
S: How good are you at tying knots?
6.
[Now Sarita is draped in rope from a sad attempt at shibari.]
A: Terrible.
S: Ah. So maybe not this one then.](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:smfbrzsfsmjotl42ibwscqua/bafkreieenzksqoum4c4k6k7lwecvcasp2bhmay7uh4bobvptgdixjmjpnm)
![1.
The people of the Earth had skin the color of the stones, the sands, and the soil.
And the people of the Sky had skin like midnight, or noon, or a stormy sky. Sunset or dawn, and so on.
[A diverse assembly of people holding various tools. The style is that of petroglyph art.]
2.
The Skyflesh had powerful magic and lived like pampered gods, while the Earthflesh had no magic and were forced to do all the work.
[The Skyflesh party above while the Earthflesh labor below.]
3.
Secretly, a tiny few among the Earthflesh had taught themselves to use magic.
They called themselves Elementals.
[The Earthflesh learn the power of (going counterclockwise like the purple spiral in the center) water, air, earth, fire, and spirit.]
4.
With the power of air, earth, water, fire, and spirit at their side, the Elementals stepped up to demand justice and equality for the Earthflesh.
[The five Elementals demand justice from the Skyflesh emperor.]
5.
Of course the Skyflesh refused. So the Earthflesh used the magic of the elements and fought to free themselves from the tyranny of their oppressors.
[The Elementals, sick of Skyflesh bullshit, use their power to bring down the Skyflesh.]
6.
They rent the skies open and forced the Skyflesh back into the Heavens. Then all the Elementals together cast a powerful sealing spell to lock the Skyflesh away forever.
[The Elementals cast their magic skyward.]](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:smfbrzsfsmjotl42ibwscqua/bafkreiagsyhqfhvlslrbu2o5cepz7eqwytkkottvy475kmyf2z7vrnptmq)
![1.
[Jo, Gabrielle, and Mitsuki are standing around the computer.]
Mitsuki: So... Which character do you want to cosplay?
2.
Jo (pointing to Gabrielle): I definitely think Gabrielle should be Karlach.
Gabrielle (flexing her arms): I'm not quite as big as she is, but I do have the height.
Mitsuki: And the abs.
Gabrielle: Plus I want to see what I look like with horns.
3.
Gabrielle: Jo, who were you thinking about being?
Jo (hesitating): Uh, well, I was leaning toward Lae'zel.
Mitsuki: I don't know, babe.
4.
Mitsuki: I think you'd make a good Shadowheart.
Gabrielle (excited): Ooo! Definitely!
Caption (pointing to Mitsuki and Gabrielle): Both of them *really* want to see a femme Jo.
5.
Jo (scoffing): *Shadowheart?!* Really?!
Mitsuki: A Child of the Darkness who is aloof, moody, and secretive? I can see it!
6.
Jo (crossing her arms over her chest): Chk! Fine.
Mitsuki: So I guess that means *I'm* Lae'zel.
Gabrielle: This is going to be great!](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:smfbrzsfsmjotl42ibwscqua/bafkreihuhjxnzr4tjjdyykaynbhptbjaddzk2wgncx2vk4eeniaybvn6ou)
![Kitab - Rain with a Chance of Vertigo
1.
[I'm checking the weather on my tablet.]
Blonde: Are you checking the weather *again*?
Me: Yeah.
Blonde: Why?
Me: I have a *vestibular disorder*.
2.
Blonde: What is that?
Me: The vestibular system manages balance and spatial orientation.
Me: It's in the inner ear.
3.
Me: Weather changes can make barometric pressure mess with the inner ear and that can cause all kinds of problems.
Me: Like dizziness, vertigo, nausea, tinnitus, migraines, light sensitivity, brain fog, and occasional hearing loss.
[A barometer shifts back and forth between stormy and sunny weather, while a bunch of emoji style faces exhibit dizziness, nausea, tinnitus, light sensitivity, brain fog, and migraine.]
4.
Blonde: Whoa, that sucks.
Me: Yes it does.
5.
[I hold in my fingertips a couple of blue and yellow earplugs.]
Me: But I've got it under control, more or less, thanks to earplugs.
Blonde: Earplugs?
Me: Yeah.
6.
[I put the earplugs into my ears.]
Me: If I block my ears from the changes in pressure, it can ease some of my symptoms.
Blonde: Weird.
7.
[I hold my hands over my ears, blocking two floating icons of speakers emitting sound.]
Me: Of course it also means I'm deliberately kneecapping my hearing, which isn't totally great to begin with.
Me: But I would much rather have no hearing and no vertigo than yes hearing and yes vertigo.
8.
Blonde: Kind of idiotic that such an important system in the body can be broken by weather.
Me: What?
9.
Blonde: I said it's kind of ... Oh. I see what you did there.
Me (smiling): ... What?](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:smfbrzsfsmjotl42ibwscqua/bafkreidz2r5hgipswymt2bgwpwy36vlcikex4wuclw3zpn4tpjchnycwwu)
![1.
My first awareness of gender nonconformity was in 1983. I was eight.
(Pointing at eight year old me) Future sapphic aroace trans enby.
[Eight year old me lies on the floor watching MTV and drawing with crayons in a sketchbook.]
2.
Annie Lennox was the first to make me go, “Hmm…”
“She’s a girl, but she’s dressed like a boy. Curious.”
[Annie Lennox with bright orange hair and wearing a suit, from the Eurythmics video for Sweet Dreams]
3.
The 1988 movie ‘Vice Versa’ got me thinking about body swapping.
Especially after I saw what happened to the villains.
[Scene toward the end of the movie where the villains have a freakout upon seeing their bodies switch.]
4.
In 1991 I saw David Duchovny’s Denise in Twin Peaks.
But I didn’t quite connect Denise’s trans experience with my own, probably because I still didn’t know 'transgender’ was a thing.
[Twin Peaks 211: Denise reintroduces herself to Agent Cooper.]
Denise: Coop!
5.
In 1994 I learned about a movie called 'Switch’ in which a guy dies and comes back as Ellen Barkin.
Yes. Switch. THat is what I would like to do. But how?
[The movie poster for 'Switch’]
6.
Sometime around 1996 or 1997 a chance viewing of an episode of Maury Povich introduced me to the word 'transsexual’.
(Pointing at Maury) Just wants to exploit trans women.
(Pointing at trans woman in red dress) Genuinely wants to explain what it means to be a trans woman.
7.
Me: Wait, that’s what I am?! but I don’t want to look or act like that!
(Pointing at my drawing pad on the table) Drawing girl versions of myself.
8.
In 1999 I attempted to begin my transition, but I panicked. What if I was wrong?!
Me (stressed): But I don’t really want to be a feminine straight girl! Maybe I’m not really trans!
9.
In 2002 at the Oregon Country Fair, I could no longer hold together the shattered pieces of my egg.
[Guy Me wanders through the fair between two women. One is topless and walking away.]
Me (thinking): I really want boobs so I can look good in a suit and tie.](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:smfbrzsfsmjotl42ibwscqua/bafkreigqalgjt7muwma4ca43cjwmmk4aqfayeazybszl47vhknttjpgf4a)
![Kitab - Assistive Technology
1.
[pointing to my throat and left ear]
Astrid: I can't use my voice anymore due to abductor spasmodic dysphonia.
Astrid: Plus I have audio processing issues and actual hearing loss.
2.
[signing: COMMUNICATE]
Astrid: So I could use some *assistive technology* to help me communicate.
3.
[wearing AirPods in a crowd - On the right, a maxed out volume in the red goes down to four pips of green on the right.]
Astrid: The new Apple AirPods Pro 2 are apparently hearing aid quality.
Astrid: I could use the noise cancelling to help me hear in crowded environments.
4.
[holding an iPad Mini in my left hand and an Apple Pencil in my right hand]
Astrid: The iPad Mini is my favorite iPad size.
Astrid: And the new one is compatible with the Apple Pencil Pro.
5.
[I'm writing on the iPad Mini while surrounded by paper notes]
Astrid: Since I can't speak now, I could use this to write notes.
Astrid: It saves paper and keeps my communication *ephemeral*, like speaking.
Notes: Yeah, my voice is broken. - If you speak clearly. - I'd ... a latte please. - Where is the bathroom? - I'm still learning ASL.
6.
[enjoying music, represented by a staff of assorted notes floating up and away]
Astrid: Of course, I can also use this for digital art and listen to music.
Astrid: Bonus!
7.
[Sarita is in a white dress and has her arms crossed. Astrid signs: YES]
Sarita: You're just trying to justify dropping $1000 on fancy toys.
Astrid: Well, I mean, *yeah.*
8.
[Sarita still has her arms crossed. Astrid signs: DRAW]
Sarita: Do you even ***have*** $1000?
Astrid: ***Of course not!*** I draw comics and post them on the internet. How would I have ***money?!***](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:smfbrzsfsmjotl42ibwscqua/bafkreianyet7mcas5xfuuxl7feuwp2huqdsnobqkm7rowzlo46ku63itua)
![Kitab - I Kinda Hate Smiling
1.
[Golnaz and I stand together and address the reader.]
Me: This is Golnaz. She's from my webcomic "Threads from the Blue Rock Tapestry".
Golnaz: Hey.
Me: She never smiles.
Me: She represents that part of me that wishes I didn't have to smile all the time.
2.
[I pull the corners of my mouth up into a mock smile.]
Me: Because I smile a lot.
Me: But rarely does my smile accurately reflect my emotional state at the time.
3.
Me (VO): I smile because:
I'm nervous or anxious. [me looking nervous with sweat]
I'm trying to be perceived as friendly. [me smizing brightly]
I'm in an uncomfortable social situation and about to freak out but I'm trying not to completely lose my cool in public. [me grinding my teeth with electric bolts coming out of my head]
I'm performing a version of myself that I assume you'll feel more comfortable seeing. [me smiling a huge fake smile with an exclamation point]
4.
[I'm holding a little 'smile on a stick' in my right hand, and definitely not feeling like smiling.]
Me: I wish I was bold enough to only smile when I genuinely feel like smiling.
Me: Instead of, you know, constantly.](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:smfbrzsfsmjotl42ibwscqua/bafkreibocxhsfes6ppel422bjrmb7mi6cqyyqnejfwbgg5mvkbmrsi5wu4)
