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Real Pope Francis

@differentspice.bsky.social

5 followers 14 following 135 posts

hello it is me pope francis I am enjoying my retirement. everything I say is directly endorsed by the catholic church.

Posts Replies Media

Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 13h

I only take advice from people who’ve had less than 2 suicide attempts

Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 15h

Dangerously close to creating a new ideology: all stuffed animals are inherently fascist

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Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

If I was in hellraiser I would not have solved that gay little rubiks cube

Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

Broom is for witches and I get scared every time someone uses one

Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

It’s ok to poop in your bed if it’s your birthday

Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 21/09/2026

Men look gay as fuck when they smile. AND ITS A GOOD THING.

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Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 21/09/2026

Trouble youth would not be writing yaoi fan fiction about those two columbine boys if they were fat. And that’s everything wrong with society.

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Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 21/09/2026

The Smithsonian is adding my name to their list of “Bitches Who Eat Honey By The Spoonful”

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Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

I wanna do drugs with wire mother

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Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

My name is Fats McCool Clusky

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Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

They should make a gun that shoots berries

Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

Young people are like dog blood

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Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 14/09/2026

The lead pipe is the cudgel for the 21st century

Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 06/09/2026

I work for slender man as his tailor. He pay me $200 a second and has offered to finger me many times. Which I have always politely refused.

Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 05/09/2026

My name is Oswald Five Hundred Dollars

Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 03/09/2026

I have chronic SIDS

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Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 03/09/2026

My name is Julie Cigarettes

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Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 03/09/2026

Young people loooooooove underscores

Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

My name is Professor Red Berries

Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 01/09/2026

My name is Ruth Angela Vibes

Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 30/08/2026

Who is my Bosnian contemporary????

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Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 29/08/2026

They’re calling it “Sophie’s Choice for Gamers”

Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 19/08/2026

My deluxe luxury handcrafted gourmet chocolate delicacy with an absolutely sensual water filling

Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 01/08/2026

Pauppoydoggggggggggggg. We let rhythm take us

Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 01/08/2026

I have a Wallace and Grmoit type moveset. Grombit Was my sensei

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Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 01/08/2026

Me and Gena Rowlands are scheduled to engage in combat. BUY TICKETS NOW.

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Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 01/08/2026

Mister DJ play that song before I detonate the bomb

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Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 01/08/2026

People use to throw rotten and FRESH vegetables at me because my blood looked like fish blood. But. Now it looks like mouse blood. Big improvement. Huge.

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Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 01/08/2026

Paper towel elites. I STEAL PAPER TOWELS FROM FANCY RESTAURANTS. We. Do. What. We. Need. To. Do.

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Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 01/08/2026

No one’s ever made music. We’ve never heard it. But. Sometimes. If you drink sweet vermouth. You can get Ever So Close. cunt.

Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 01/08/2026

Tonight we let the cold noodles talk and I don’t know. I don’t fucking know.

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Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 31/07/2026

Starting a charity that feeds grapes to underprivileged lanky dogs

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Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 31/07/2026

Everyone calm down the Italian woman is here

Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 26/07/2026

Sending a cease and desist to people who are short

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Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 25/07/2026

I have generous donation to the lesbian bar of 1 (one) paper towel holder.

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Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 23/07/2026

Beer before cheese: covered in fleas Cheese before beer: people will jeer

Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 14/07/2026

Everyone is horny or suicidal these days. Sometimes both. I have gone beyond this though by stealing different amounts of money from the people around me.

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Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 14/07/2026

Sending my haters invoices

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Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 14/07/2026

I have grilled cheese type personality. TOMATO SOUP. Bitch!!!!!!

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Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 06/07/2026

Sucking dick is fine, a great way to pass the time even. Sucking cock is unforgivable.

Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 02/07/2026

I can confirm that Dead Dog University lies in Dog Bone Village

Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 02/07/2026

I have been slightly Chinese for decades

Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 02/07/2026

Lowkey feels good as fuck to hit innocents with hammers and other blunt objectssssss

Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 02/07/2026

I am a tenured professor at Dead Dog University I teach Fat Economics

Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 02/07/2026

I graduated Cum Loud at Dead Dog University

Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 30/06/2026

A chicken is spiritually similar to a great ape in the eyes of a frog

Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 26/06/2026

I can’t give blood because they told me my blood look like fish blood

Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 21/06/2026

The octagon would be nothing without the stop sign

Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 12/06/2026

We are all one race. Lithuanian.

Real Pope Francis @differentspice.bsky.social · 08/06/2026

I am the manger at the evil mall where everyone dies