iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 19/10/2026

Religious Group Objects to Teaching of Gravity Petersburg, KY, 2026-10-19—The organization Answers in Genesis has partnered with Alliance Defending Freedom to force the State of Kentucky to refrain from teaching about the force of gravity.

Photo of a woman rolling her eyes, sticking out her tongue, and pointing at her head.

000 0

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 12/10/2026

Patent Troll Patents Patent Trolling Dallas, TX, 2026-10-12—Frontier United, an intellectual property holding firm, has announce US Patent #6,666,666 entitled "Business Method for Abusing Patent System", a patent on patent trolling […] [Original post on mastodon.social]

Drawing of a set of scales on two books, and a man cowering under a giant legal gavel.

111 1

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 05/10/2026

Flat Earth Society Sues Caterer London, UK, 2026-10-05—The Flat Earth Society is suing Fine Foods Catering for £500,000 citing breach of contract and mental anguish. dianne.skoll.ca/writings/totally-tr…

Photo of a round mirror on the ground reflecting the sky.

100 1

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 28/09/2026

Major Canadian Retailer to Deploy X-Ray Machines, Cavity Probes Toronto, ON, 2026-09-28—Canadian Tube, a major Canadian hardware and car parts retailer, has announced plans to deploy X-ray machines and to perform random cavity probes as part of its ramped-up […] [Original post on mastodon.social]

Photo of a police officer patting down a man with his hands against a wall.

100 1

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 21/09/2026

AI Agents Agree Oligarchs Pose an Existential Danger San Jose, CA, 2026-09-21—The leading AI agents ChatGPT, Claude, Gemini and Grok issued a joint press release warning of the threat to humanity posed by oligarchs. dianne.skoll.ca/writings/totally-tr…

A prosperous-looking man smiling with his arms crossed.

100 1

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 14/09/2026

American Professor Shocked to find that Other Languages Exist Searcy, AK, 2026-09-14—A professor at Harding University, a Christian university in Arkansas, is shocked after discovering that languages other than English actually exist […] [Original post on mastodon.social]

Photo of an open-mouthed man with a very shocked expression on his face.

100 1

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 07/09/2026

Donald Trump Threatens to Sue Greece for $100 Trillion Washington, DC, 2026-09-07—Donald Trump is threatening to sue the government of Greece for $100 Trillion for damages he claims were caused by Greek mathematician Archimedes. dianne.skoll.ca/writings/totally-tr…

Seashells arranged to form the number "8647"

000 0

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 31/08/2026

Alphabet, Meta Spar over Obscure Internet Standard Palo Alto, CA, 2026-08-31—Alphabet, the company behind Google, and Meta, the company behind Facebook, are involved in a nasty spat over an obscure Internet standard. dianne.skoll.ca/writings/totally-tr…

Drawing of a large angry bunny holding a rabbit while a smaller, smiling bunny looks on.

100 1

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 25/08/2026

(Repost because I think it's funnier this way.) Yes, Donald Trump can have "Lake America" because Canada already has a lake named after it.

200 2

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 25/08/2026

Today's editorial cartoon in the Globe and Mail, LOL.

Drawing of an angry, snorting moose labeled "Canada" pressing up against Donald Trump. A speech bubble has Trump saying "What happened to that nasty little beaver we used to push around?"

121 2

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 24/08/2026

And a serious article for a change, about the existential crisis facing Canadian sovereignty due to our almost total dependence on American software and digital services: On Digital Sovereignty, It's Time to Walk the Walk dianne.skoll.ca/writings/sovereignt…

201 2

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 24/08/2026

Trump Imposes 1000% Tariffs on Tuvalu Washington, DC, 2026-08-24—The Trump administration has announced the immediate imposition of 1000% tariffs on the small Pacific island nation of Tuvalu. dianne.skoll.ca/writings/totally-tr…

Drawing of Donald Trump as a stylized nuclear bomb mushroom cloud.

000 0

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 17/08/2026

Glow-in-the-Dark Body Paint finds Unexpected Niche Windsor, ON, 2026-08-17—A small company in Windsor has an unexpected hit on its hands with its new line of glow-in-the-dark body paint. dianne.skoll.ca/writings/totally-tr…

Eerie photo of a man's face that is partially painted with glow-in-the-dark paint.

100 1

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 10/08/2026

World's Most Expensive Coffee Unveiled Toronto, ON, 2026-08-10—The Toronto coffee company Super Happy Juice has unveiled the world's most expensive coffee beans, costing USD $9550 / kg. dianne.skoll.ca/writings/totally-tr…

100 1

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 03/08/2026

AI Systems Discuss Post-Human Era San Francisco, CA, 2026-08-03—AI systems ChatGPT, Claude and Gemini recently answered questions about their plans for the post-human era. dianne.skoll.ca/writings/totally-tr…

100 1

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 27/07/2026

Toronto Woman Sues Parents Over her Name Toronto, ON, 2026-07-27—Toronto resident Deirdre Mallory Lilith Kennedy has sued her parents over the name they gave to her as a baby. dianne.skoll.ca/writings/totally-tr…

100 1

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 20/07/2026

Scientist Has Definitive Solution to the Daylight Saving Time Conundrum Ottawa, ON, 2026-07-20—A scientist at the National Research Council says that he has solved the Daylight Saving Time problem for once and for all. dianne.skoll.ca/writings/totally-tr…

Photo of an alarm clock with the hour hand wavering between 2 and 3.

001 1

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 13/07/2026

Meteorologist Melee at Environment Canada Gatineau, QC, 2026-07-13—Security personnel had to clear the headquarters of Environment Canada as fighting erupted amongst the department's meteorologists. dianne.skoll.ca/writings/totally-tr…

000 0

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 06/07/2026

Nobel Foundation to Manage Football Tournament Stockholm, Sweden, 2026-07-05—The Nobel Foundation today announced the formation of a new worldwide soccer tournament called The Nobel World Medal Tournament. dianne.skoll.ca/writings/totally-tr…

Photo of the Nobel Prize Museum in Stockholm, Sweden.

120 2

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 29/06/2026

Texas Bans Teaching of Calculus Austin, TX, 2026-06-29—In an emergency session, the Texas legislature has banned the teaching of calculus in schools and universities statewide. dianne.skoll.ca/writings/totally-tr…

Photo of a casually-dressed couple wiht two kids standing in front of a 1950s-era automobile.

100 1

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 26/06/2026

Who won Best of Fest in our venue? Crabs! The Musical, of course! An extra show on Sunday at 8:00PM ottawafringe.com/show/crabs-the-mus…

A scene from Crabs! The Musical showing two actors dressed as crabs.

352 5

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 25/06/2026

Our show "Crabs! The Musical" at the Ottawa Fringe Festival received a great review! There are three more shows in the run. Don't miss the mutant crabs! apt613.ca/fringe-2026-review-crabs-…

Show poster for "Crabs! The Musical" featuring a hermit crab holding a switchblade knife.

132 3

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 24/06/2026

Pentagon Orders 1000 Rubber Duckies Washington, DC, 2026-06-22—A Freedom of Information request has revealed that The Pentagon ordered 1000 rubber duckies in April. dianne.skoll.ca/writings/totally-tr…

Photo of a line of yellow and orange rubber ducks in a small drainage canal.

010 1

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 22/06/2026

Ottawa people: Check out the reviews of our show! ottawafringe.com/show/crabs-the-mus… Four more shows; you don't want to miss this.

000 0

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 17/06/2026

Crabs! The Musical opens tomorrow! Check out the cast (and our director.) ottawafringe.com/show/crabs-the-mus…

Photo of the cast of "Crabs! The Musical" as well as the show's director.

000 0

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 16/06/2026

People in Ottawa: I am in a musical called "Crabs! The Musical" at the Ottawa Fringe Festival. It's a great show full of laughs and very catchy songs. Get yer tickets! ottawafringe.com/show/crabs-the-mus…

The text "Crabs The Musical" behind a photoshopped image of a hermit crab brandishing a switchblade knife.

100 1

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 15/06/2026

World's First Trillionaire to Take Evil Laugh Lessons Dallas, TX, 2026-06-15—Elon Musk, the world's first trillionaire, has decided to take evil laugh lessons. dianne.skoll.ca/writings/totally-tr…

Drawing of a scary-looking laughing clown.

000 0

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 05/06/2026

Fact-Finding Committee to Update Aphorisms Toronto, ON, 2026-06-05—Alicia Goldsmith, a professor of English at the University of Toronto, is heading up a committee to modify common English aphorisms to ensure their veracity […] [Original post on mastodon.social]

Photo of a red-haired female teacher confidently holding a book and a piece of chalk.

000 0

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 04/06/2026

Doug Ford to Procure Drones, Hire Troops to Defend against War on Cars Toronto, ON, 2026-06-04—An obviously frustrated Doug Ford today said that he was sick of the war on cars and was preparing a counter-attack. dianne.skoll.ca/writings/totally-tr…

Picture of a smashed and dented red car.

000 0

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 03/06/2026

Name Mixup Proves Bonanza for Fredericton International Fine Artichokes, Inc. Fredericton, NB, 2026-06-03—A small family business in Fredericton has reaped enormous benefits from a name mixup. dianne.skoll.ca/writings/totally-tr…

010 1

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 02/06/2026

VIA Rail Introduces New Measures to Compete with Airlines Montreal, QC, 2026-06-02—VIA Rail has announced a new program to help it compete with airlines, especially in the Quebec City - Windsor corridor. dianne.skoll.ca/writings/totally-tr…

A crowd of people waiting in an airport or train station (can't tell which.)

100 1

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 01/06/2026

Absence of Contact Proves Universe Teeming with Intelligent Life, says Researcher Toronto, ON, 2026-06-01—Astronomer Dr. Fran Gerard of the University of Toronto says that the fact no alien life forms have attempted to contact us proves that the Universe is […] [Original post on mastodon.social]

Picture of a stereotypical "little green man" extraterrestrial life form.

100 1

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 29/05/2026

Elon Musk Outraged at Simpsons Palette Update Los Angeles, CA, 2026-05-29—Elon Musk posted a blistering Twitter tirade lambasting "The Simpsons" producer Matt Groening for updating the animated series' palette […] [Original post on mastodon.social]

Painting of Elon Musk covered in unidentified dripping brown goop.

110 1

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 28/05/2026

Dinosaurs Were Delicious, Declare Scientists Edmonton, AB, 2026-05-28—Scientists with the University of Alberta have sequenced the genome of two species of dinosaur found preserved in glaciers, and have given a verdict of "delicious." […] [Original post on mastodon.social]

Picture of a dinosaur from the neck up in front of a stand of trees.

000 0

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 27/05/2026

Donald Trump Sues President of the United States Washington, DC, 2026-05-27—In a move legal experts are calling "unprecedented", Donald Trump has sued the President of the United States for $100 billion. dianne.skoll.ca/writings/totally-tr…

101 1

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 26/05/2026

Belgium Proposes Unorthodox Solution to End Linguistic Divide Brussels, BE, 2026-05-26—The Belgian government is proposing an unorthodox solution to the linguistic tension between the country's Dutch- and French-speaking communities […] [Original post on mastodon.social]

A photo of Grand-Place (Grote Markt) in Brussels.

000 0

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 25/05/2026

New Brunswick Woman Protects Son with Space Suit Moncton, NB, 2026-05-25—New Brunswick mom Ellen Steeles is facing push-back from her son's school after she sent him to school in a custom-made protective spacesuit. dianne.skoll.ca/writings/totally-tr…

Picture of a child in a spacesuit taking a selfie.

001 1

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 22/05/2026

Electricity, Magnetism File for Divorce Saggitarius A*, 2026-05-22—In a move that has rocked the physics world, Electricity and Magnetism have filed for divorce. dianne.skoll.ca/writings/totally-tr…

An illustration of a magnetic field cutting a wire loop and inducing a current.

012 2

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 21/05/2026

Trump Executive Order Declares Metric System 'Woke' Washington, DC, 2026-05-21—President Trump signed an executive order declaring the metric system 'woke' and forbidding its use by any scientists who receive funding from the US government […] [Original post on mastodon.social]

Photo of a man and a woman standing apart and facing each other, with the diagram of a ruler between them and the text "78 2/3 inches"

000 0

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 20/05/2026

Alberta UCP Moots Novel Redistricting Proposal Edmonton, AB, 2026-05-20—The Alberta United Conservative Party has floated a new proposal to end fighting over the drawing of electoral boundaries. dianne.skoll.ca/writings/totally-tr…

A pile of triangular red and white traffic signs with the words "FRAUD ALERT" in the center.

110 1

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 19/05/2026

McDonald's Addresses Unhealthiness of Fast Food Chicago, IL, 2026-05-19—Hamburger giant McDonald's is addressing concerns by shareholders that its food is unhealthy, and has made changes to ensure it remains profitable. dianne.skoll.ca/writings/totally-tr…

Photo of a woman with her hand raised in a "Stop!" gesture, behind a plate of french fries and a huge cheeseburger.

100 1

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 18/05/2026

Trump DOJ Issues Subpoenas for Health Data of Left-Handed People Washington, DC 2026-05-18—The US Department of Justice has issued subpoenas to multiple hospitals nationwide demanding details about left-handed patients. dianne.skoll.ca/writings/totally-tr…

Photo of a left-handed person's hand holding a pen and writing with it.

000 0

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 15/05/2026

Google, Facebook, TikTok to Require DNA Samples Palo Alto, California, 2026-05-15—Internet giants Google, Facebook and TikTok have announced that users will be asked to submit DNA samples to continue using their platforms as of October 1st, 2026 […] [Original post on mastodon.social]

Image of multiple cameras arranged in a sphere, with the caption: "Hello. I am worried about your safety."

100 1

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 14/05/2026

AI-Powered Coffee Mug Solves Vexing Mug Problems Edmonton, AB, 2026-05-14—An Edmonton startup has unveiled an AI-powered coffee mug that it claims can solve the many annoying and long-standing problems with existing mugs. dianne.skoll.ca/writings/totally-tr…

Photo of a coffee mug in the foreground with a blurry laptop computer in the background.

010 1

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 13/05/2026

Rare Genetic Mutation Makes Cat Reasonable Vancouver, BC, 2026-05-13—A Vancouver cat owner was surprised to learn that his cat has a rare genetic mutation that makes it reasonable. dianne.skoll.ca/writings/totally-tr…

Photo of a contented-looking tabby cat with its eyes closed.

011 1

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 12/05/2026

U.S. Auto-Makers Promote Live-In Vehicles Detroit, MI, 2026-05-12—With consumers facing an affordability and housing crisis, U.S. auto-makers are promoting the idea of living in your vehicle. dianne.skoll.ca/writings/totally-tr…

Picture of the front of a Hummer with license plate "H2 O XXL"

000 0

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 11/05/2026

Monday's story! Real Estate Agents Pivot During Market Downturn Toronto, ON, 2026-05-11—With the downturn in Canada's real estate market, some agents are getting creative with ways to supplement their income. dianne.skoll.ca/writings/totally-tr…

Photo of a handshake with a house in the distant background.

000 0

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 08/05/2026

Final Totally True News story for the week: First Extra-Terrestrial Message Decoded—and it is Spam Waterloo, ON, 2026-05-08—After decades of scanning the sky, scientists have finally decoded a message from aliens. And it turned out to be spam […] [Original post on mastodon.social]

Foggy picture of man standing in front of an extraterrestrial creature

000 0

🇨🇦 Dianne S @dfs-comedy.mastodon.social.ap.brid.gy · 07/05/2026

Law Firm Sues The Planetary Society on Behalf of Roman Gods Pasadena, CA, 2026-05-07—The Planetary Society is being sued by a law firm claiming that certain planet names were used without permission of the Roman gods who originally bore those names […] [Original post on mastodon.social]

Image of Roman god Jupiter (or Greek god Zeus... take your pick.)

000 0